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Starsky and Hutch, My Hero

a Sweet Revenge tribute (a tribute to David Soul too)

Charcoal pencils and sort pastels drawing on paper

Onnakarot on AO3

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😭😭💔💔

Paul and David, Starsky and Hutch

Forever

feeling nostalgic and sad

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I would totally watch it too! Starsky & Hutch-the Golden Years

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Celebrate Valentines Day with Starsky & Hutch

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Linda McGee's Classic zine fic is now on the new Starsky and Hutch Archive

Good morning... more good news from the new archive. Our archivists have been working hard to bring classic fiction to all of us. They've been working on Linda McGee's stories, and while not all of them are up yet they will be soon. Risk won the prestigious Huggy award and is filled with lots of h/c and jeopardy. Special thanks to Keri for posting this update!

Enjoy!

Linda's posted stories to date:

The Sweetest Revenge: http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/the-sweetest-revenge/

Retrospective: http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/retrospective/

Risk: http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/risk-2/

Home Repairs: http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/home-repairs/

Lifewatch: http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/lifewatch/

"Forever": http://www.starskyandhutcharchive.net/forever-2/

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every small city has that one dictator chic house

I don't know why, but every city, no matter how big, has some insanely stacked dictator-looking McMansion somewhere outside the city limits. If you sort your Zillow results as Price: High - Low, this house will pop up first. It costs something like $5,000,000. It is 10,000 square feet. There are usually frescos and tawdry gildedness of some variety. The realtor's text brags of marble and uses the word "Manor."

Today, our house, squarely in this category, is found in the suburbs of Milwaukee, WI, not really a place known for unhinged 21st century robber barons. In fact, I find Wisconsin to be one of the least McMansion-dense states in the country. Even the guy who invented Culvers or the Milwaukee Bucks probably has a much less insane house than the one I'm about to show you:

Built in 1999 (owing to what kind of economic event outside of perhaps the dot-com bubble, I'm not sure), this house is indeed around $5 million and 10,000 square feet. I am not sure how much of the square footage includes the garage. Anyway, if you told me this house was from Wisconsin, I would not have believed you. Illinois, maybe, the DC area, maybe, California, maybe, Texas, most likely. But no. It is in Milwaukee and it is the one house in the surrounding area that looks like this and costs this much.

In typical local-magnate fashion, the house opens up with white and gilding. This is how you know the people who live there are really rich and have Made It. All the McMansion signifiers are present: chopsticks machine, lawyer foyer, puzzling and dull art, always in imitation of something architecturally undefined but possibly French.

In an attempt to not be too off-putting (indeed, having a ceiling full of religious symbolism seems a bit overzealous even if its purpose is to scream "I HAVE MEDICI-LEVEL AMOUNTS OF MONEY"), the house is furnished, well, normally. It cannot decide whether it wants to sell (it will never sell) or if it wants to lean into being an eccentric millionaire's house. This is very cowardly.

Perhaps the decorative thought process comes from a desire to elevate the ordinary into the realm of the sublime. Sure, let's go with that and not the fact that obscenely rich people are uniquely obsessed with French Rococo aesthetics because they long for a time when democracy wasn't real.

On the other hand, I guess you don't really need a functional kitchen if you never have to work a day in your life!

One thing that strikes me about extremely rich people is sometimes they don't know how ordinary people live and function and in this case, design a bathroom. Hence, they are one clogged toilet away from carpet replacement. Imagine living life on the edge like that.

"I wish to lie awake and stare wistfully into copies of my visage." - things totally normal people would say.

Everyone needs to have one chinoiserie room in their house - it's part of being a global citizen. Also I appreciate the effort of turning six acres in Wisconsin into Versailles 2. That's a worthy endeavor because $6 million dollars goes half as far in California. You might be able to buy a shrub for that much.

Finally, we reach the rear of the house, which is, well, phallic:

Obviously this is paying homage to the vernacular forms of the grain silo. Or something.

Happy New Year.

If you like this post and want more like it, support McMansion Hell on Patreon for as little as $1/month for access to great bonus content including a discord server, extra posts, and livestreams.

Not into recurring payments? Try the tip jar, because media work is especially recession-vulnerable.

[daisy-loves-sh]

DC Slash Con is Coming! July 14-16, 2023

Registration is currently $5 per person until March 15th. Visit our registration page to register or find more information.

What is DC-Slash?

We are a group of like-minded slash fans who want to have the opportunity to talk about our favorite obsessions together whether it be at conventions or online. We started in the DC Metro area hence DC-Slash. The original members were people who used to attend ConneXions.

We used to do a Fandom of the Week on our Social Media where we recommended vids and fics, but we have currently put that on hold in favor of our Social Distance Gatherings held on Zoom and Discord. We will still post some recommendations, but we don't have enough time to read enough to do recommendations while doing the gatherings.

We meet on Tuesday nights for Vidders Chat, Wednesday nights for Tatort, and on Saturdays for Virtual House Parties and Binges. We have a calendar of opportunities to get together in person and several online opportunities for discussion - Facebook (DC-Slash), Dreamwidth (DCSlash), and Discord (dc-slash).

If you are interested in joining us and are having some trouble finding us or just have a question, you can reach us via dcmf.office@gmail.com or at @dcslash or @aaronantium.

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hello to the other 2.5 Starsky and Hutch fans who use this as their primary social medium. did you know i’m autistic and work in history? no? would you like to? well, then, do I have the chronological spreadsheet for you.

✨ The Comprehensive Starsky & Hutch Pre-Canon Timeline ✨ 

containing:

birthdates!

family!

a weird amount of abandoned friends!

footnotes!

no, seriously, a lot of footnotes!

someone make them stop with the footnotes!

You can partake of this resource in one of two modes: straight-up (the clean PDF) or on the rocks (the S&H archive post with more irrelevant detail)!

Thank you, and have a pleasant stay

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by S (Hartley_Jr)

A fanvid to Read my mind showing both Starsky’s and Hutch’s povs and trying to capture the essence of their relationship through its lyrics.

Words: 7, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Starsky & Hutch

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: David Starsky, Ken Hutchinson

Relationships: Ken Hutchinson/David Starsky

Additional Tags: Fanvids

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Things I Love About This Scene:

Starsky casually tending to Hutch, getting him water so he can take his medicine and opening the pill bottle for him

Starsky’s ADHD moment where he forgets why he was getting water in the first place and takes a drink out of the cup and Hutch’s indignant  “Hey!” followed by that sheepish “oops” look on Starsky’s face 

Dad!Dobey scolding them for leaving him out of the loop. Hutch clearly thinks he’s just being reprimanded for not following procedure, when Dobey is obviously really worried about what happened. You could have been killed Hutch, and he’d have no way of understanding why. 

Starsky just picking up Hutch’s water once he’s taken the pills and drinking out of it again. Their constant cup sharing makes me smile. 

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Scenes From a Botched Hit // “I may not know a lot about a lot of things but there’s one thing I know about Hutch: he’s a creature of habit. He does things a certain way.”

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Shippy Episodes

These are the ones I remember the best, but I may add more! If I missed any, please also feel free to add.

Season One

· S1E1: Pilot- my goodness. The intro. The snark. The conversations. The chemistry. They have an hour to convince you these two men are best friends and soul mates and they do just that.

· S1E3: Death Ride- I just love this episode. Everything goes to shit, and yet we see these two work in perfect sync. Putting hats on each other, eating off each other’s plates, joking about the watch. So many small moments that they can play off of each other with, and you can really see their relationship both professionally and outside of work.

· S1E5: The Fix- Can you even talk about shippy episodes without bringing up this episode? Seeing Starsky so protective over Hutch, seeing him literally hold him down and nurse him through withdrawal is I think the solidifying moment of these two as something more than friends.

· S1E14: Shoot-Out- My personal favorite. Oh my god. Lets go get dinner together! Lets do a well worn good cop bad cop routine! Lets playfully insult each other and then tearfully apologize because you cannot stand your last words to each other being anything other than loving and caring! We’ve got on and off work relationship, protective Hutch, honestly some protective Starsky, it really is just such an adorable and simultaneously painful episode.

· S1E21: A Coffin for Starsky- My god, what The Fix is for Hutch to Starsky, this episode is that for Starsky to Hutch...if that makes sense. Hutch catching him as he crumples in the parking lot, Hutch threatening people to protect him, the angst of it all!

Honorable Mention

· S1E10: Lady in Blue- Now I know what your thinking- the episode where Starsky’s ex dies? But the protective and understanding nature of Hutch is so tender and well done. It really does show that these two be in love with other people, either concurrently or in the past, but they will always love each other.

Season Two

· S2E3&4: Murder at Sea- Oh the banter and snark in these episodes is so good! The teamwork of removing the bomb, holding each other when they blast the door open, desperately trying to do a talent show and deal with guests. They are so clearly on the same wavelength the whole episode and they are so over literally everyone else. Even the little conversation when they are searching the boat in the first episode shows such casual closeness, and it feels so natural.

· S2E5: Gillian- Similar to Lady in Blue, it shows that even when in love with someone else, their duty is to each other. And the scene “you love him too, don’t you?” the subtext is slowly making its way to text.

· S2E9: Tap Dancing Her Way Right Back Into Your Hearts- So these two slow dance together regularly right? These two argue whose leading with quite well worn arguments. These two flirt and “accidently” step on each other’s feet and roll their eyes and are each others partner in every way. Buying each other hot dogs on lunch break. C’mon boys.

· S2E12: Iron Mike-Very me & thee this episode. Also, just the scene where they try to look over the fence? Incredible.

· S2E14: Bloodbath- Ah and we get to separated but together. The fear in Hutch as he looks for Starsky, and just holding each other at the end. It really has a special tone, this one.

· S2E18: Survival- I would argue the accompanying episode to Bloodbath- separated, one in unknown danger, the other looking for him. The reunion is so simple and sweet and they do such a good job keeping it genuine.

Honorable Mention:

· S2E25: Starsky and Hutch are Guilty- Oh the me & thee vibes are strong with this one.

Season Three and Season Four I am having major issues remembering exactly (a lot of them are overlapping with Hardy Boys and A-Team lol). I’ll maybe take some time to re-watch these seasons, or if anyone wants to add these seasons feel free!

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Part 2 of my Hal Fischer’s Gay Semiotics-inspired Starsky & Hutch photo montage series(!) is on the advent calendar today (spoiler alert: he’s a cowboy)

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Great post! Love this especially: "Partner A and Partner B do not stray more than a foot from each other for entire episode." 💖💖

I wanted to mention that while the first 911 call was placed in 1968 in Alabama, emergency 911 service wasn't implemented in Los Angeles until 1984. Although Starsky could have dialed "0" to reach an operator who would transfer his call. But if he'd done that, the operator probably wouldn't have understood what he was saying since he could barely speak. Plus then we wouldn't have had the lovely scene of Hutch being all angsty in the ambulance with him. 🥰

I have a lot of questions about ‘coffin for starsky’ but I will limit myself to the most obvious for now:

Trained police officer, drugged and on the verge of blacking out, manages to secure a telephone and instead of dialing a very expedient three-digit emergency number, he decides to dial an excruciatingly long seven-digit number because he clearly needs an ambulance, but he needs his ‘partner’ more. What is that? (Thank god it wasn’t a rotary phone.)

Same man, drugged—but with the good shit now—insists on leaving the hospital, pantsless, so the entire staff ends up ogling his ass. (No seriously, what was that entire pantsless argument about? You called your ‘partner’ instead of 9-1-1 and you expected him to stop and pick out your clothes on the way to the hospital???)

‘Partner’ does not stop once in 24-hour death watch to notify the family of dying man because we’ve established early on that he is the best friend and the hospital staff is, like, cool with it. No question, just an observation.

Partner A and Partner B do not stray more than a foot from each other for entire episode. (Also an obvious observation that really needs no comment.)

They just. They just said those things. In the middle of the squad room. They just. Sat there, holding hands and looking intently at each other in the middle of a fucking police office on television in 1976. Because they were pals???

I need a moment.

Dying man kills the only lead they have to a possible antidote becasue he’s SAVING HIS PARTNER’S LIFE. smh.

I need another moment.

(Interlude) Is the entire hospital staff blind? Quit calling them friends! Do you not see how they are looking at each other, clinging to each other, in these finals hours??? What is wrong with you robot people!?!? (Deep breath.)

Deranged chemist is holding a grudge against both Starsky and Hutch but chooses not to take them both out at once. He hits Starsky first so that Hutch can watch him die, for maxim revenge. Was I supposed to interpret this confrontation scene any other way???

Also, how was this an efficient plan? You let Hutch live—thereby assuring that Starsky has 24 hours during which time Ken “I don’t give up” Hutchinson would be able to save him.

Partner A, upon finding out that Partner B will live, blinks back tears of joy and closes eyes and sends up a thank you prayer to a god he may or may not believe in—and he looks so damn pretty doing it. Wait. That’s not even remotely a question. I better quit while I’m ahead.

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I have a lot of questions about ‘coffin for starsky’ but I will limit myself to the most obvious for now:

Trained police officer, drugged and on the verge of blacking out, manages to secure a telephone and instead of dialing a very expedient three-digit emergency number, he decides to dial an excruciatingly long seven-digit number because he clearly needs an ambulance, but he needs his ‘partner’ more. What is that? (Thank god it wasn’t a rotary phone.)

Same man, drugged—but with the good shit now—insists on leaving the hospital, pantsless, so the entire staff ends up ogling his ass. (No seriously, what was that entire pantsless argument about? You called your ‘partner’ instead of 9-1-1 and you expected him to stop and pick out your clothes on the way to the hospital???)

‘Partner’ does not stop once in 24-hour death watch to notify the family of dying man because we’ve established early on that he is the best friend and the hospital staff is, like, cool with it. No question, just an observation.

Partner A and Partner B do not stray more than a foot from each other for entire episode. (Also an obvious observation that really needs no comment.)

They just. They just said those things. In the middle of the squad room. They just. Sat there, holding hands and looking intently at each other in the middle of a fucking police office on television in 1976. Because they were pals???

I need a moment.

Dying man kills the only lead they have to a possible antidote becasue he’s SAVING HIS PARTNER’S LIFE. smh.

I need another moment.

(Interlude) Is the entire hospital staff blind? Quit calling them friends! Do you not see how they are looking at each other, clinging to each other, in these finals hours??? What is wrong with you robot people!?!? (Deep breath.)

Deranged chemist is holding a grudge against both Starsky and Hutch but chooses not to take them both out at once. He hits Starsky first so that Hutch can watch him die, for maxim revenge. Was I supposed to interpret this confrontation scene any other way???

Also, how was this an efficient plan? You let Hutch live—thereby assuring that Starsky has 24 hours during which time Ken “I don’t give up” Hutchinson would be able to save him.

Partner A, upon finding out that Partner B will live, blinks back tears of joy and closes eyes and sends up a thank you prayer to a god he may or may not believe in—and he looks so damn pretty doing it. Wait. That’s not even remotely a question. I better quit while I’m ahead.

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Comparing the rotations of objects in the Solar System. Just look at them lol.✨🪐

To everyone that's confused, the planet Venus rotates very very slowly, with a single revolution taking about 243 Earth days, and Mercury rotates slowly, but not as slow as Venus.