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Dear God, If you're here God Make the fire disappear when they stare God
emi
guys, na-in love ako sa may jowa na naka-open relationship. sana binaril nyo na lang ako for real aAAAAAAAAH
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dorm week 1
feeling very out of place, unoccupied, and guilty
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dorm week 0
just did something i shouldn’t have done - on my very first night here at the dorm no less
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parang gusto ko na lang maging artista. indie films lang kasi medyo ligwak tayo sa visuals department hjsklvdf pang-poverty porn lang mukha ko hahaha
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I hate how I so badly want to be good at something but I never do the things I need to do in order to achieve it.
When I was seventeen, I asked for a guitar as my birthday present because I was so sure I could be very good at it. But the very first time I played a chord, I got so mad I wasn’t getting it right right away so I completely abandoned the thought of playing the guitar right then and there. LMAO
Now, I want to be good at writing whilst only having read at most five books in my entire literate life. Also, it’s not that I don’t enjoy reading. I do. It just requires something I cannot provide. UNDIVIDED ATTENTION. God help me and my short attention span.
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I was able to discover my crush’s letterboxd account. I have no idea how far I can go about my newfound obsession until it’s considered unhealthy but here I am. In my defense, all his accounts share the same username which made looking him up as easy as can be. But they’re all private, so I can only see so much. That’s why I still don’t think I’m going overboard with this online stalking that I’ve been doing ever since I got to know about him. Anyway, I have read every review that he has published. And I’m about to see every film that he has put on his favorites pile. I guess this is what they consider being “down bad” for somebody. I want to get to know him better. I want to know what he likes and why he likes what he likes. I also want to like the things that he like. I also want to be good at things he’s good at. Writing, for example. I never knew you could fall for somebody because of the way they write. I mean, I love Taylor Swift’s writing, but I don’t want to be with her. You get what I mean? This one, though! When I read the cute short reviews he has attached on every film that he has watched, I get mesmerized by his choice of words. I can only wish to be as good as him. But I will try :) I’ll keep him as my inspiration to write better.
UPDATE: 08/10/2022 4:37 am
may jowa sya since 2020 (ata?) 🙃 thank u for everything. good bye
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