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Untangle
How do I unwind us
I no longer recognize us
I don't know me
All the ins
All the outs
Ups
Downs
Every which way
Everything intertwined
It's one big tangled mess
How do we untangle
Poetry Art Collection 3
Dannie Sinisi
2020
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I’m Me
Waking nightmarish hell that haunts my life.
Why can’t I escape the darkness’s embrace.
Tortured endlessly by thoughts that won’t leave me.
To scared to call for help in my echo chamber of fear.
To young to see it was constructed around me.
An ideology constructed by impotence and control.
Creating a self loathing cage to hold my soul.
It’s sting hot bars glowing red hot from the fire within.
Illuminating the darkness with pain and fright.
I peer out carefully and feel the heat.
Spears stab through the bars pushing me back in.
Madness starts to set in with it’s think black ooze.
Holding me back down against the far back wall.
Putrid rot of all the dying dreams lying at my feet.
A far sound, keys jingle.
Is this the culling or to set me free.
I am happy to meet either destiny.
A small beam of prismatic light hits my face.
It has a warmth and beauty I’ve called to from my heart.
As quick as it came it left.
Leaving me yearning desperate to feel again.
Still the days or nights pass in these bowels of hell
No jingle, No light.
Creeping along the floor to peer out.
Nothing but dark mist.
Sounds of a distant cacophony of screams frightens me.
I’m not the only one in here.
Again, the keys jingle.
My heart flutters with anticipation.
The light of colors slowly traces along a bar of fire.
The fire turns to ash as it is extinguished.
The light begins to dim so I scurry to it.
I try to bask in it’s light but it fades away.
It left behind an even stronger yearning.
Now one bar is extinguished but I can’t escape.
I now understand what is needed to get free.
I scream.
Come back.
Oh, please come back.
A jingle again with a quick flicker of light that sizzles a bar.
Not strong enough.
Where is the strong light I need.
I yell out again.
My voice scratches at my throat that I can taste the blood.
No sound of keys.
No light.
The screams of others pierce my ears.
I fall to the mold ridden floor grasping them.
Trying in vain to muffle them out.
Blood drips out my ears like roaches crawling out.
I feel it run down my neck.
An internal darkness fills me with impending doom.
I seek to end this.
I get to my feet wobbly and battered.
I rush to the bars.
I take in their burning.
Spears pierce threw my leg and arms.
I reside that this is death’s sweet release.
I hear over their screams the keys.
I see her in her prismatic glory.
She didn’t extend her light.
She stood fast before me making way of darkness.
Quieting the noise around my pit of despair.
I release the bars and staffer back.
Blood dripping from all my wounds.
My weaknesses has me woozy.
I ponder if she is real.
I fear it’s a trick my captors play on me.
Why would she not move to me like the others.
What spell has she cast.
She just stands stoic and steadfast.
A peacefulness I have never known.
Yet something familiar.
I feel something I’ve never felt before.
A safety summons me.
My heart warms from within.
I feel a strength radiate from it around my body.
The blackness at my feet retreats from where I stand.
Tingling glorious light emits from the pores of my skin.
Shimmering colors extend around me.
Where they touch the blackness, it surrenders.
All my wounds heal.
I yearn to embrace her.
Without hesitation I step to the bars and press on them.
The sound of freedom sizzles echoing through this hell.
Ash falls to the floor.
I’m free as the darkness retreats for good.
The amalgamation of our souls begins.
We are strong as we ascend from the darkness.
Its tendrils stretch out in vain.
We attain a higher level of self love and acceptance.
We are free.
She steps back from me.
There is space but not distance.
She walks beside me in life.
Ever chasing out the darkness from each other’s lives.
Other’s come and go.
But not my ever-present prismatic soul.
I no longer fear that darkness will envelope me.
It can’t hurt me for long even when it does sting.
The light inside myself is strong.
I use it to show other’s that are still in their cells a way out.
I am a force of beautiful nature.
Pure and true to myself.
Unbound of the atrocious history I was forced to endure.
I’m free.
I’m me.
Poetry Art Collection 4
Dannie Sinisi
2022
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Summer Land
Our place is between life
Under our purple tree
In our moss-covered bed
Alongside a warm stream
We dance on water
We sing our loves song
A few years in-between
We search to find each other
You know my soul each time
I always find you
Our love is transcended all time
We then do it all over again
No one else worth coming back for
This time a little less the halfway through
I'm just waiting for the end
I want to dance with you again
In our summer land
Poetry Art Collection 2
2023
Dannie Sinisi
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You didn't
Sometimes I go back and reread our pain
Torture myself with your past transgressions
The knife dulled yet the cuts are still deep
When repercussions still rip through my life
Maybe I didn't mean to reread your cheating poems
Maybe subconsciously I need that to keep me
To keep me not falling back into lies you weave
I don't want you, I don't have that love anymore
So why does it hurt so sharply inside me
Why does it turn my stomach upside-down
I've always loved another also and she heals
She is her own burden on my soul
Yet you can still wound me and anger me
Your kindness is their on your good days
Your sober days and your happy days
You show up to help and care in your way
Yet the pain you caused so makes me scream
I scream in my car so no one hears
Shaking in terror of the mess you left me with
I trusted so deeply in you not knowing truths
I can't give that ever again to anyone
Never will I have that peace inside me
I've come to understand I'm the exception
Everyone lies and cheats in one way or another
I was honest from day one about her
You knew that I would never have cheated
Now I'm stuck with your dull knife of deceit
Financial ruin and homelessness plague me
I hold our child and cry as she sleeps
Just wanted to support her and keep her safe
My broken body curbs my ability to provide
My broken mind needs time to mend
Yet it doesn't have the time to heal
Dark caverns if gooey gray moss cover my mind
I struggle to learn for her so we can survive this
Every help falters and every hope fades
Every step forward is giving way
My bloody fingers claw at unstable stones
I watched others climb and succeed
Yet I keep failing over and over
How much more can I take off this all
Wispers in my mind hope for war to end it all
For Earth the spin is off so this can just be over
I want to see our daughter grow
I want to see her life bloom into beautiful moments
The cold nights are here and the treat of loss looms
Will we have heat or food or gas or safety
What will become of us
We where supposed to do this together
Now I get a few years of financial support
I'm alone and terrified with no way out of this hell
Sometimes I go back to reread the pain you caused
I try to find the reason you would hurt us like this
Why you would utterly decimate the only ones here
The only ones who loved you honestly
I was just not as string as your drinks or your lusts
I never could give you my whole heart
She still held it but I have you all I had to give
Now I choose to wait for her or to stay alone
No more half hearted lovers
Who would want this broken mess anyway
You didn't
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Silo
Silo - Vernon, New Jersey 2022
Absolutely no editing.
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The Devil Inside 2022 (at Vernon, New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/CbUB4VTuVmy/?utm_medium=tumblr
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The Vanishing- Ramapo College of NJ school assignment The Mysterious Object ( no sound), 2/2022
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Mark Tiarra- professional guitar player in his home studio. NJ
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