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darkiplierxreader · 3 years ago

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I wrote a one-shot! It’s a Markiplier ego fanfic where you (the reader) live with the egos! It’s a platonic oneshot so all the relationships in here are platonic! (Example: a lot of the egos are like brothers or caretakers or you can view it as just freinds :>)

(Cross posted on AO3)

Tittle: Grounded

Words: 14k

Chapters: 1

Summary: You were so incredibly fucked. After getting into a fight at school, (it was less a fight more just a beat down you really did a number on the kid,) one of the egos is tasked to pick you up. Dark is not happy with your actions and grounds you, the other egos don’t know how to feel but they are upset because you are upset. Big Brother Bing knows exactly what to do though, he cheers you up by, in true teenage rebellion fashion, sneaking you out.

Without further ado! I present grounded! *insert jazz hands* (Happy reading! :>)

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You were so fucked.

There was no way you would be able to talk yourself outta this one. No amount of pleading, reasoning, or puppy dog eyes was gonna get you off the hook.

You picked at your nails nervously, it was a bad habit you had been trying to break for the past few weeks.

An office secretary walks past you, you vaguely recognize him from an assembly. You watched him walk and sit at a nearby desk.

Sitting in the office chairs and picking at your nails, you try to muster up the courage to talk to him. Your knuckles were bruised and you had a few bleeding cuts, hence why you needed to ask the secretary for bangadges.

You had spotted the bandages on his desk earlier but had been too nervous to ask for some. You didn’t wanna come off as rude like you were entitled to bangadges after what the other kid looked like right now.

You winced remembering how busted the kid looked. He had been shipped off to the nurses office as soon as security managed to pry you off of him. (Compared to you it looked like he had gone through hell and back.)

While you felt a little bad for him, that sympathy had been squashed when you remembered why you had punched him in the first place.

Asshole had gotten a bit too snarky with one of your more anxious friends. They weren’t too fond of confrontation so they opted to ignore it, and per their request you were gonna ignore it too! You swore you were gonna!

But that asshole just had to open his mouth again.

You clenched your fist in anger, remembering what he had said. You remembered watching your friends eyes shine with tears, you remembered how they caved in on themselves, and then you remembered how you had turned around and started swinging.

Let it be known, you were not one to pick fights and you didn’t endorse unnecessary violence.

But you didn’t regret a damn thing.

Or you hadn’t regretted a thing until you had been all but dragged to the discipline office. You had been sat in a chair and told to wait here until your parents came to pick you up.

You were pretty sure the only reason they hadn’t called you into an office to talk yet was because you were quite literally shaking with rage when you walked in here.

Realistically they were just giving you a chance to calm down and normally you would have appreciated that.

But right now it was like a death sentence. Because calming down meant you were left with no defense. The nervousness had already started to worm its way into your head, as much as you had tried to cling onto your anger it was swiftly replaced with fear.

All because of what the secretary man had said.

“Stay here for now and we’ll call someone to pick you up.”

we’ll call someone to pick you up.

Those seven words were like a death sentence.

Someone was coming to pick you up.

Meaning one of the egos would be here.

Meaning that they knew you had gotten into a fight.

Meaning you were absolutely and totally screwed.

You were double screwed now that you weren't mad anymore. If you were angry then they would have at least left you alone for the rest of the day to cool off.

Worst part is you didn’t even know what reactions to expect because you had no idea who was coming to pick you up.

You could only hope and pray with all your heart that it wasn’t Dark.

The man was scary on a normal basis but you had no idea how he would react to you getting in trouble at school.

You always used to feel sympathy for whatever poor soul that had to deal with a pissed off dark. And today there was a possibility that soul would be you.

You might as well start digging your grave now.

Mentally you ran through who would come pick you up.

You could start with people that had little to no chance of picking you up, King of squirrels was highly unlikely.

His royal attire would catch too many eyes, bring too much attention. While he sometimes wore normal clothes, he never went anywhere without his crown. (You're pretty sure he slept with it on.)

While the egos would no doubt be upset that you had gotten into a fight, they would never risk having someone question your living situation.

No matter how pissed off they wouldn’t bother you at school, they didn’t want to crush the tiny sense of normal that you got from going to school. It helped to make you feel like an average kid.

(Plus they didn't want anyone to call CPS on your ass. You're pretty sure your house was most definitely not up to code and that CPS wouldn't like you guardians. Especially considering half of them couldn't be counted as human.)

It did make for awkward situations whenever someone asked to hang out at your house.

Whatever, point is, they wouldn’t blow your cover. That meant that King wasn’t coming to get you. (You’re pretty sure that a man in full monarch attire, who smelled like peanut butter and had an army of squirrels following him, would be a dead give away.)

So King was crossed off the list.

Another easy cross off was Host. While you would admit it would be funny as hell to scare the shit out of those annoying kids from math, Host was a no go.

A man with constantly bleeding bandages over his eyes that only spoke in third person was bound to attract a lot of stares.

(A shame, Host is quite calm, the most you would get from him would be disappointment. You didn’t take him to be angry, and even if he was, the Host was always one for quiet anger.)

(You imagined the Host being disappointed in you, or ignoring you out of anger, and on second thought you don’t think you could emotionally handle that.)

Considering that Silver didn’t take off his costume often, he wasn’t coming either. (Plus you're pretty sure he was working right now.)

(He would also probably be disappointed, he was a hero after all, and the one that had taught you how to throw a good punch. Though, the kid you hit had kinda deserved it, maybe Silver would be ok with it considering the asshole was basically a villain in the making anyways.)

Edger wouldn’t be coming either. Honestly you kinda hoped he would stay home. You two clashed heads a lot, sometimes playfully sometimes for real, it was hard to tell.

(Sometimes even you didn't know the difference).

You didn’t really like his whole selling babies thing. You could never really seriously hold it against him though, considering that you lived with a bunch of morally questionable people.

(I mean come on. How would it be fair for you to chew out Ed when Willford was right there?)

(And that’s not even mentioning the other egos' crimes. You didn’t know the full extent but you did know that they had all done thier fair share of fucked up shit.)

Except for maybe Eric.

He seemed like he would die of guilt if he did anything to mildly inconvenience someone. Man had apologized for breathing too loudly once.

You didn’t even entertain the idea of Eric coming to get you.

There was no way in hell he would be sent to get you, the egos wouldn’t let you off that easily. (Eric wouldn't have the confidence to discipline you.) Besides, even if he did come, you don’t think you would be able to take the uncomfortable silence for the drive back.

You would feel bad, he would feel bad, it just wouldn’t work out. (You would then blame yourself for each other feeling bad, then feel worse, and the endless cycle of blaming yourself would continue for both you and Eric.)

On a similar note there was no way that Yan would be picking you up.

For one, he was the youngest in the house, only second to you, and you didn't know if the administration would let a high scholar pick you up. Granted he was a senior and would be graduating and going to college soon, but his age wasn't the only issue.

With his more… protective nature he was more likely to kill the kid you had just beat the shit out of, rather than discipline you.

He was almost always on your side and would give you the world in a heartbeat if you asked. (He was also very possessive of your attention and affection. He strives to be your favorite ego.)

(Unfortunately for Yan, had long ago decided that you would never ever pick a favorite for fear of them all mauling each other.)

(Seriously, it was so weird. Half the time you could barely figure out if they tolerated your presence and the other half it seemed as if they adored you.)

So that meant Silver Shepherd, Host, King of the squirrels, Yandereilpier, Ed Edger and Eric Derekson were crossed off the list. There was little to no chance any of them would show up.

Who did that leave?

Who had a chance of showing up but it was unlikely?

The jim’s weren’t likely to get you. Actually the more you thought about it there was nearly no way they would be sent to collect you.

(They would probably try and interview you about the fight. Might even ask your classmates for the video. Speaking of that video, you need to figure out who recorded it and ask them to send it to you. You didn't even consider the idea that no one recorded it. You knew you could throw a pretty good punch. Must have been entertaining to watch, which is exactly why the Jims would ask for the footage.)

You mentally moved Jim to the list of “definitely not coming.”

Dark could show up. You shivered thinking about how scary the man would be when he found out you had gotten in trouble.

You would place him in the “definitely not coming” list, his monochrome skin and red and blue auras would be difficult to hide. Plus the air around him was typically static, these traits made it very easy to assess he wasn’t human.

All of these factors made it so that he should be on the not coming list, but, well, you didn’t wanna cross him off completely. He did have reality altering abilities after all, you didn’t know if he could hide his appearance but you sure as hell didn’t wanna find out.

All in all, you were praying it wasn’t Dark coming to pick you up.

You knew you would have to face him once you got home but at least you could prolong that fate a little while longer if someone else came to pick you up.

Another on the list of, “probably not but don’t rule it out completely”, was Derek. It wasn’t likely the man would come and get you.

(You're not even sure he really liked you, he just tolerated your presence. Then again the same could be said for a lot of the egos.)

Next up in the list was Wilford. Now, the man was a wild card. You weren’t too sure how he would react, or if he would be sent to retrieve you.

As much as you wanted to say that the rest of the egos would have the sense to not send Will, you couldn’t be certain.

While it was highly unlikely, you could never rule out any possibility when it came to Will.

Anuus was somewhere in between the “most likely” category and the “not likely but don’t rule it out”.

While he should be in the most likely as he is quite calm, (ergo he’s able to act like a normal law abiding citizen) and he looks relatively human.

Only problem is that sometimes he was a bit too calm. It seemed to be an ability of his, he was able to soothe anyone around him just by being there. His presence seemed to inflict calm in the people around him, even if they should not be calm at that current moment. Besides his abilities, you still didn’t figure he was coming to get you for 2 reasons.

You didn’t know each other too well, he was one of the egos that you hadn’t spent too much time around yet. (He wasn’t wandering the house often, you had only interacted briefly.)

His abilities were… inconsistent. While he normally looked like a normal human in a white suit at other times he took on different appearances. (You remembered staring into the blank white eyes as he became nothing but a skeleton in front of your eyes.)

You still had nightmares about that incident.

Sometimes you swore you heard ticking in the distance when around him. You didn’t know to the extent of what he would do but you knew one thing for sure, Annus wasn’t supposed to be walking around.

By that you meant he was supposed to be dead.

It was part of the reason he wasn’t at the manor often. He had told you that he wasn’t supposed to be alive with such a calm voice, as if talking about the weather.

You weren’t sure where exactly Annus went when he wasn’t at the manor but you didn’t wanna find out.

This meant the most likely candidates to come get you were, Dr. Ilpier, one of the Goggles, Bing, and Bim.

The androids of the house were slightly lower on the list due to the nature of them not being human. While you had no doubt they could blend in well, it was more likely that a human would pick you up.

(You were also praying none of the goggles came to get you.)

(You did not want a passive aggressive lecture for the entire car ride.)

That left the Doctor and Bim.

You hissed as you accidentally picked at injured skin, the pain throwing you out of your thoughts. You had picked at one of your scratches, making the wound bleed.

You glanced back towards the bandages on the secretary’s desk.

Normally you would have been sent to the nurses office, but considering the kid you beat up was there, it was a good idea on the staff's part to keep you both separate.

This did mean that unfortunately you were just gonna have to suck up the pain that came with the tiny bleeding cuts. It wasn’t as if they hurt too much, sure they stung a bit, but you could deal with it.

You just didn’t wanna get blood on the waiting room chairs.

You tried to inconspicuously hold your bleeding hand close to your chest.

Well, if Doc was coming to get you he might have bandages on him. Especially if he was coming from work.

You frowned for a moment. Today was Thursday, typically Dr. Iplier had work on Thursdays and he wouldn’t get out until…

You glanced at the clock hanging on the wall.

He wouldn’t get out for another 4 hours.

Well, out of the two Bim seemed like the better option anyway. The Doc was known to yell and got annoyed pretty easily. If you pulled him outta work, you doubted he would be happy.

That left Bim.

Would he be angry?

In all honesty you weren’t sure. Bim could be a bit snarky at times (more so condescending, and he did it all with a smile) and he had a bit of an ego. (Ironic choice of words considering he was quite literally an ego.)

But on the other hand, Bim was a suck up. You had been subjected to his flattery before. (It happened on occasion, more so when he thought that someone was fighting for his self proclaimed spot as favorite.)

You and Bim were actually pretty close, anytime you would see him in the house it was instinct to spark a conversation.

One of your favorite pastimes was finding ways to insult the next ego that walked into a room you were both in. But the challenge was to do it without making it sound like you were openingly insulting them.

(Ergo, passive aggressive comments, pretending to forget important details about them, just generally being nuisances.) You both made a pretty good team, trading insults and building off of each other to annoy your victim.

(It was like a fun little game whenever you walked into a room and saw Bim. The moment you made eye contact the game began and the both of you would wait. Then the next person to walk through the door was now dubbed as the victim.)

(The only exception to this rule was Eric. You refused to insult him, even indirectly.)

(One time Dark walked through the door after Bim, and the game turned into a game of chicken. A game where you and Bim tried to dance around insulting Dark and see who chickened out or faced Dark’s wrath. Last one standing won.)

(The one and only time you had played chicken, you won and still brag about that to this day.)

On occasion you would mock and insult each other as well. Though, those days were rare and you both took on a very specific tone to indicate you were joking. It was over exaggerated and goofy but you both acted as if the insults had rattled you to your core.

The times Bim was actually annoyed though? He was snappy and snarky. His passive aggressive bumped up to a whole new level. You had seen him like that before, typically when something went wrong with his show or his favorite contestant didn’t win.

You had never been on the receiving end of his anger, nor did you want to be.

(Hearing his insults for you in a serious manner would hurt more than you’d like to admit.)

You must have had a frown on your face or something. Or you had been zoning out staring at the bandages cause, pretty soon you could hear the clicking of the secretary’s shoes.

You panickedly looked up as he stood in front of you.

He held the box of bangadges in an outstretched hand. You blinked before muttering out an awkward, “thank you.”

“Do you want me to go grab you some ice from the nurses office too?” you u

He gestured to your jaw, it would start to bruise soon if you didn’t get something cold on it.

“O-oh! Uh- yes please.” You gave a grateful smile.

The secretary seemed unbothered at your nervousness as he just nodded and walked off.

You went to pick at your nails and skin again before closing your fist, effectively stopping yourself. You sat there tapping your foot for a few minutes until he came back, ice in hand. You took it with another grateful smile and he went back to his desk.

You used a few more bangadges than necessary. (It was fun wrapping them around your fingers, and it stops you from picking at your nails.)

Bim might be annoyed but you're sure that you could get off the hook if you explained why you punched the kid. It wasn’t like you fucked him up too bad, and in the egos eyes what you did would probably only be the equivalent of a scratch.

Yeah, If you told Bim what the asshole said he wouldn’t be too mad.

Didn’t mean it would get you out of Dark’s discipline. Bim had no chance of saving you from that. Really none of the egos did, except for maybe Willford if you played your cards right.

You knew that Dark and Will had known each other the longest, and Will wasn’t bothered by Dark’s intimidating aura. (You're not sure if Will was scared of anything to be honest. He seemed like he couldnt recoginze murder even if it was 5 feet in front of him. Or maybe he just didn't care.)

Only problem with that is that Will typically went along with whatever Dark said. So it was a matter of Will’s fondness for you Vs. His fondness for Dark.

(Could you call his relationship with Dark fond? Not really, but Dark hadn't killed him yet and Will annoyed him on a daily basis so you figured that was as close to “fond” as they would get.)

You didn’t think you would win that fondness battle.

Host might be able to do something as well. Dark respected him quite a bit. Knowing Host though, he wouldn’t come to your aid, the most he would do would be to lessen your punishment if he thought it to be unfair.

(Which he wouldn't because he was basis and all the egos seemed to enjoy you being grounded cause it meant you had to stay home. Meaning you had to stay with them all day.)

(It wasn't just Yan that was overprotective as hell. All of them were in their own little ways. It was just Yan’s type of overprotectiveness that was one of the more obvious cases.)

(His obsessive nature didn't just stick to his crush at school. No, it beld over to anyone he cared about, it just manifested itself in different forms. For that kid at his high school, it was romantic, for you? He was an overprotective, mildly possessive, ride or die, older brother? Friend.)

Annus might be able to calm Dark down as well, making your punishment not as bad. But those chances were slim, Annus went missing quite often.

(Man just kinda disappeared when you forgot about him and when you remembered him he reappeared.)

(He had said something about him supposed to be dead and only live in others memories but you didn’t think he was being serious.)

(Apparently he didn’t think it was serious either cause he seemed just as puzzled as to why he was alive.)

Not to mention, you didn’t think you were close enough to Annus for him to stick up for you.

No one could save you from your fate.

You groaned a bit, you were obsessively looking at the clock waiting for when they would call you in.

It was only a matter of time now.

Then the office door was opening and they were calling your name.

You got up and trudged over to the open door.

Inside was the assistant principal. She pulled out a chair for you, out of courtesy, and gestured for you to sit.

The chair was scratchy and uncomfortable.

She took her own seat in a swivel chair and asked for your name and ID. You assumed she was typing it into the computer to pull up your file or something. (You didn’t know how this worked as you had never really gotten in serious trouble before.)

She greeted you and asked if you knew why you were here today.

Your mind was currently a constant loop of, don’t be snarky, don’t be snarky, don’t be snarky, don’t be-

“Because… I punched a kid?”

You held back a wince at how bad that sounded. As if you were confused on why you were here, as if you had done nothing wrong. (That last one was debatable depending on who you asked.)

“You did more than just punch, but yes. That is why you are here.”

Ok, so you may have punched him repeatedly, maybe a few kicks here and there but she was making it sound as if you mauled the kid!

Besides you would have stopped after one punch if he didn’t start spitting insults.

You mentally scoffed remembering him, cowardly asshole. He did all that talk but as soon as you actually did something he was whining like a baby.

“You did quite the number on Mr. Hernandez.”

“He provoked the fight.” You spoke out in a firm tone before you could stop yourself.

“I don’t think that whatever Mr. Hernandez said, it was bad enough to warrant that type of harm.”

You had to bite back a scoff, Come on! it was rule number one to not talk shit unless you could handle the consequences.

You looked away from the assistant principal and repeated Hernandez’s exact words.

Based on the way her eyes widened and she had to stifle her reaction, it seemed as if yeah his words were bad enough to warrant your beat down.

She had to remain professional though.

“While what Mr. Hernandez said was extremely inappropriate, it does not mean you get to inflict physical harm.”

You crossed your arms, suddenly finding the markings on her desk very interesting.

She sighed and seemed to level with you.

“As much as I would like to reprimand Mr. Hernandez for his behavior, you nearly broke his arm.”

You had to try and hide your surprise and by the look on her face you failed.

“If the security guard hadn’t broken the two of you apart, you would have broken his arm.”

You could tell she was being serious because she said your name in the, “look kid you fucked up”, tone.

You hesitantly met her serious eyes with surprised ones.

God damn. Looks like training with Silver had paid off. You didn’t think you were that strong, god, being around the egos was starting to mess with what you thought was strong.

You muttered out a small, “I didn’t mean to. I really thought that I had only roughed him up a bit…”

You trailed off. Sure the asshole had deserved to be hit but damn. Was it really that bad? You looked down at your own hands. You had walked outta that fight with nothing but a few tiny scratches and a bruised jaw.

You tried to recall what he looked like after the fight.

…

Yeiks. It was that bad wasn’t it?

It seemed as though that realization showed on your face as the assistant principal sighed and leaned back in her chair.

“Look, I can tell you're a good kid, but this kind of behavior isn’t going to slide. I’ve already called your parents to come pick you up. In a week we’ll have a parent conference to discuss what your long term punishment should be. Mr Hernandez and his parents will also be present and they will decide whether or not they want to press charges.”

You blanked for a moment. Holy fuck, were you really that strong? Strong enough for them to think it was serious enough to press charges apparently. Oh god, Dark was gonna be pissed.

“Until then, you are temporarily suspended.”

Well shit.

Now you were double fucked. (Triple? You didn't even know at this point, you just knew it was bad.)

You spoke up, asking when the meeting was. You would have to come back here for the conference next thursday.

Who was gonna come to your conference?

Dark?

You couldn't really imagine anyone else going.

Yikes, you were not looking forward to that.

The assistant principal walked out of the room, informing you to wait while she went to retrieve your guardian from the sign in desk.

You wondered if Bim would be all dressed up or if he decided to change into more casual clothes to come and get you.

You prepared yourself to face him with a steady breath.

You could hear the click of the assistant principal's heels getting closer.

Accompanying those clicks was another set of footsteps, you grabbed your bag and stood up.

Maybe puppy dog eyes would work on Bim? You hadn’t really done them with him yet. You hadn’t actually done them with any of the egos, not on purpose anyway.

You didn’t think you were capable of them but according to most of the house residents you were. (And according to a lot of the egos, you were real good at it too.)

You stood outside the assistant principals office watching as she rounded the corner.

You were met with quite the unexpected sight. Instead of seeing the gray of Bim’s suit you were met with black. A black hoodie, Bim would never wear a hoodie. (He actually swore on it one day when he saw King wearing one.)

You couldn’t see what ego it was, as they had their back turned. Very few of the egos wore hoodies though and based on the fact you couldn’t smell peanuts, it definitely wasn’t King.

You knew the doctor also wore them on occasion but if he was pulled from work then he would be in uniform. Yan wasn't as tall as the hooded figure, so it wasn't him either.

Eric?

No, there's no way they would send Eric. It could be one of the Goggles but you had never seen any of them wearing hoodies.

Who did that leave?

You realized just as the figure turned to face your direction.

Seeing the round orange glasses confirmed your theory.

Bing was here, they really sent Bing to get you?

Oh god they sent Bing to get you.

You looked towards the assistant principal seeing her face contorted in confusion. You would be confused too if you saw a kid's supposed “dad” use skater dude slang.

You hurriedly rushed over with a yell of “Hey Bro!” You mentaly cringed, siblings never called each other brother in the manner you had just used it, instead they just used names like normal people. For this purpose though you needed to make it very clear that Bing was your “older brother”.

“Benji! I thought Dad would be picking me up?” You rushed out, walking over. Bing seemed confused for a moment at your on the spot nickname but to his credit he caught on quick.

“Suhh dude,” He greeted you, with a tiny fistbump, “and nah, dad was in a meeting, meaning I got sent to come getcha.” He moved to ruffle your hair.

You glanced towards the assistant principal to see her face relax. Seemed like she bought the whole “big brother Benji” act.

“Well then, we’ll go back to the sign out desk, i've already explained what happened over the phone.” You didn't meet Bing's eyes as she continued to speak. “If you could relay the information to your father, that would be very helpful.” She looked at Bing who nodded.

Then the two of you were signing out and walking to a familiar car.

You didn't take Bing for the driving type. (You didn't think he knew how to drive, now that you thought about it made sense, he was an android. If he didnt know how to do something he could probably learn it pretty quickly. Though if that logic were true he would probably be a master at skateboarding tricks by now.)

You went to ask him before remembering why he was here in the first place and that you were in trouble right now. You quickly shut your mouth. You would ask him later.

If Bing noticed your nervousness, (he probably did, if Google could, then he could definitely as well) then he didn’t show it. He only humed some song under his breath, twirling the keys to Bim’s cars on his finger.

Bim’s car was nice. You had seen it parked in the garage before. A few of the egos had cars and Bim’s was one of the nicer ones.

It was a light gray that was nicely polished to make it shine. You're not sure what type of car it was exactly, you could just tell it was one of those nice ones.

You had never ridden in it before. You were curious as to why Bing was driving Bim’s car though. Actually you were pretty curious as to why Bing was the one to pick you up and not Bim.

You got into the car and Bing started it up. After driving for a few minutes Bing was the one to break the silence.

“So, you got into a fight dude?”

You winced.

“You got that **** on video?” His profanity filter came in, filling his curse in with a loud beep. (It was all apart of his safe search feature.)

You stifled a laugh before hesitantly speaking, “Yeah I had time to video it while I was beating the kids ass.” You made sure to speak in an overly sarcastic tone.

Bing laughed a bit, cutting off your next sentence. “Considering you used your phone to bash his head in, yeah I figured you did have the time actually.” You had the decency to look at least a little sheepish, then you continued,

“Hold up, I'm sure someone recorded it. I’ll see if one of my friends has the link to it yet-“ You reached instinctively to your pocket for your phone before remembering it wasn’t on you.

Right, they had taken it cause you had used it to hit Hernandez in the head.

(Your case was really strong. It needed to be with how much shit you got into. Your phone had been in fires, had been shot, (Thank Willford for that one), dropped off of insane heights and despite all that didn’t have a single crack.)

(Your case and screen protector were really doing miracle work.)

They had taken it from you when you were pulled off the kid. You hadn’t had a chance to ask for it back yet.

You probably wouldn’t be able to even touch your phone once you got it back anyway. Knowing Dark you would even be able to be within a 5 foot radius of it for the next 3 months.

Damn, you weren’t even gonna be able to text your friends that you wouldn’t be able to talk with them for a while.

As you were preparing to mourn the loss of your phone, Bing took one of his hands off the wheel. He dug a hand into his pocket for a bit before pulling out your phone and handing it to you.

You blinked, surprised.

“Figured you might wanna do what you're gonna do before it’s locked away forever. Be quick though dude, and don’t tell any of the egos I gave it to you.”

You smiled and took the phone. “Did the office give this to you?”

“Yeah, had to clean the blood off it. Did you really use it as a weapon?”

“The thing is practically indestructible.” You shrugged, typing in the password for your phone.

“Wicked.” Bing said before asking, “You want the aux?”

You nodded and grabbed the cord, pulling up some music.

“Did the office explain in excruciating detail or something?” You inquired, wondering as to how he knew you had used your phone as an impromptu weapon.

“Na man, they kept it pretty vague. I wasn’t the one to answer the phone though, Bim was supposed’ta come pick you up,”

(You meantlly gave your deductive reasoning skills a pat on the back for guessing correctly.)

“but work called him in at the last minute.” Bing shrugged before continuing, “Something bout the next episode being bumped up to earlier.” He explained, talking about Bim’s game show host job.

The atmosphere was now light and playful even with your looming doom overhead. You and Bing made jokes about how you were totally screwed and likely wouldn’t see the light of day for months.

It was much better than what you had thought would be a tense and silent car ride.

While you weren’t expecting Bing to come pick you up you were kinda glad he did.

“Sooooo, Benji huh?”

You could feel yourself getting hot with embarrassment.

“It was an on the spot decision! I couldn’t exactly walk up and call you Bing now could I? Besides, you aren’t exactly dad material.”

“But I'm big brother material?”

“Shut up!” You punch him in the arm in a non serious manner.

“Alright! Alright! Geez bro I was only joking. Be careful with those fists there, don’t wanna end up like that other guy.” He says teasing you.

“I didn’t know I would mess him up that badly!”

“Right, whatever you say broski.”

You groaned and went back to your phone, determined to get as much use out of it as you could before it was inevitably taken.

You pulled up your messages and texted a few friends.

You had managed to get the video from your anxious friend, as well as inform them that you would most definitely be gone for, well you weren’t sure how long, but you told them it would be a while.

Soon you were pulling up to the familiar off the main road path that led to the manor. It would only be a matter of minutes until you got there.

You gulped nervously as Bing turned off the radio. He turned towards you with a smile.

“If anyone asks, I was chewing you out the whole car ride.”

You smiled. “Yeah, just absolutely lecturing me the whole time, I thought my ears would fall off.”

You and Bing shared a little fist bump, each of you having a tiny grin on your face.

The rest of the ride was silent as you took in the familiar scenery. Your house was nice, it was huge to begin with but had only gotten bigger the more rooms you added. (You're not actually sure how much it cost, nor did you even want to think about it. You had shown up after most of the egos were already here.)

(Actually you’re not even sure if they paid for the house.)

(They probably didn’t.)

The old dirt road eventually gave way to a newer one. You started to see the house in the distance. It looked so peaceful from the outside, a stark contrast to what usually went on inside.

Typically the loud sounds of chaos could be heard from here but today it was eerily quiet. You couldn’t even hear any birds, it’s as if the house itself was on edge with you today.

You pulled on your backpack, picking at the straps. Bing parked the car. You opened your door and stood outside the car, not quite having the confidence to walk up to the front door by yourself, you waited for Bing.

He locked the car, pocketing the keys. (Bim might be annoyed that his car was parked outside instead of his usual spot in the garage.)

(You didn’t really have time to worry about Bim’s annoyance though, Dark’s took priority.)

If you just so happened to walk at a snail's pace, Bing didn’t mention it.

And if you just so happened to pause for a few seconds in front of the door he didn’t mention that either.

You couldn’t bring yourself to move. Slowly, Bing brought a reassuring hand to your shoulder. In one of the gentlest tones you’ve ever heard from him, he asked if you wanted him to open the door.

Hesitantly, you nod.

The door unlocks and Bing slowly opens it, he follows behind you as you walk in. The house is near silent, the atmosphere tense. This typically happens whenever you get into serious trouble, it seemed that whenever you weren't happy, no one was.

Bing offered to take your backpack to your room, you nodded as he walked off. You knew the drill by now, Dark would be waiting in his office.

You knew he would give you about ten-ish minutes of leeway as soon as you got back. It was like giving the hero time to say goodbye and wrap up any side quests before they face the final boss.

You slipped off your shoes by the door, placing them neatly on the rack of mismatched shoes. Making a beeline towards the kitchen you grabbed yourself some water and downed it.

After that you sent one final text to your friend, telling them that they better make your funeral a good one.

They responded with a thumbs up and a text of “got it chief, you want daffodils or lillies?”

You sent back a quick text of hydrangeas and put your phone away. Finishing off the last drops of water, you made your way to the foyer where you spotted one of the Goggles (Green), Yan, Eric and Squirrel King.

Yan looked like he wanted to jump up and run to your aid but green held him back.

Like routine you went over to Green, silently handing him your phone so Dark could retrieve it later. (It would save more time and mean you would leave the room quicker if Dark didn’t have to take the phone from you directly.)

Yan and King sent you pitying but reassuring looks as you made the trek to Dark’s office. Eric had trouble meeting people’s eyes especially when the atmosphere was tense, it always left him on edge, despite this he met yours and gave a lopsided smile.

You knew how much the gesture meant and gave him a smile of your own.

Even Green seemed to send you a look with an emotion that you didn’t have the time to decipher.

While walking up the stairs you ran into Annus, you meant ran in the literal sense as you were so lost in thought that you had bumped into him.

You muttered out a small, “sorry”, while noticing that today his eyes were a crisp white, no iris in sight.

The man seemed to notice your current mental state and he gently placed a hand on your shoulder. A strange sense of numb calm filled you, it gave you the confidence to not break down before you even met with Dark.

You quietly thanked him and he nodded, gracefully walking downstairs.

This was it, you were now standing in front of Dark’s office. You knew that he knew, you were outside the door, but you also knew he wouldn’t say anything until you opened it. He would let you stand out there and steady yourself as long as you needed. (A small mercy, you suppose.)

(While he would let you stay out here for a while, best to not push your luck.)

With the aftereffects of Annus’s abilities giving you confidence, you opened the door.

—<>—<>—<>—

Once you opened the door, you were immediately hit with a sense of dread.

The air was static, making the hair on your arms raise. You could tell as soon as you walked through that door, that Dark was mad.

It wasn’t all that hard to tell, considering you quite literally couldn’t see half the room.

The normal bits of the room seemed to dissolve the further in you got.

It gradually morphed into a black inky void, you would be lying if you said you weren’t scared to step in further.

A few feet away, fully surrounded by void, sat dark. The only actual objects in the void were his desk, the chair he was sitting on and of course, the man himself.

All in all it painted quite the intimidating picture.

Briefly you wondered if it would be possible to walk behind the desk. Just how long exactly did the void stretch on? You couldn’t tell by looking at it so you weren’t exactly sure.

Then you realized you had been standing by the open door for far too long. Mercifully, Dark said nothing as you scampered further into the room, closing the door behind you.

The sound of the door closing was the equivalent to the closing of your coffin lid, it sealed your fate.

The silence was deafening, the longer it went on the more fidgety you got. Some part of you was relieved when Dark spoke, finally breaking the silence, another part of you was even more terrified.

“Now, then,” He droned on, almost sounding bored, but you knew better.

“I will give you the chance to explain yourself.” He brought his hands together, folding them on the desk.

…

You were fucking pissing yourself with fear, with no control of your mouth, words started to fly out.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry! there was the asshole-” You squeaked and corrected yourself at his glare, “This guy, and he- he was being a total di- i mean! Uh- He was being super rude! To ah- a friend of mine! You know them! The one who’s birthday is coming up and- I wasn't gonna hit him! I swear I wasn't gonna! You gotta believe me, Dark!”

You made panicky hand gestures to go with your words.

“But he said the most vile-! I mean you should have been there! What he said would have put what the Doc says on a bad day to shame! And Dr. Iplier can say some pretty fucked- Er- messed up shi- Stuff!”

It was true, the doctor was known for his ability to say the rudest, most vile shit, honestly it was kinda impressive.

(Impressive, but you felt bad for his patients, luckily you had never been on the receiving end of his insults, at least not the serious ones. Occasionally you were subjected to him calling you an idiot and his cranky attitude but that was mild, even tame, compared to his usual self.)

You took a moment to compose yourself, looking anywhere but Dark. With a cross of your arms, you slowly whispered what he said. Then you paused and continued with you little recap of events.

“So, yeah. And then, I punched him.”

You crossed your arms further, still not meeting Darks eyes.

“I didn't mean to maim him, that part was an accident. I didn't realize how strong I got because of Slivers training.”

There was a pause and you gave a weak shrug.

There was a moment of silence as Dark seemed to think over your words. You picked at your nails, waiting for his answer. When he finally did speak, you wished he had just stayed silent.

“5 months, LockDown.”

Nearly as soon as the words left his lips, you were already crying out in protest because that was in no way fair! Lockdown level grounded for 5 months?!

You had a chart of sorts to represent what level of grounded you were, it ranged from light, to Alcatraz.

(You hadn't ever experienced Alcatraz yet and you intended to keep it that way. Lockdown was the worst you had experienced, it was the worst on the scale too, only second to the infamous Alcatraz. With lock down you couldn't even go to school, not that it matters since you were suspended. You couldn't even go in the front yard without one of the egos having to watch you.)

(That was definitely not because you had tried to sneak away once, or twice, ok maybe thrice.)

(Lockdown was terrible. The egos were already strict as hell and barely let you go out anyway, but with Lockdown they had a reason to not let you go. A reason that they abused the hell out of.)

(It was always “Oh sorry kiddo! You're grounded! Darn. Really such a shame! Guess you'll just have to stay in and not go to the movies anymore. How sad. Anyway, wanna play monopoly?”.)

(For fucks sake you couldnt even acompany whoever was going to the store for the usal grocery trip run! One time during Lock Down, you had begged Willford for weeks just so you could accompany Eric and Silver to the grocery store. It was a new low for you frankly.)

And now, you were going to be on lock down, for 5 months! It was ridiculous!

Especially because you knew that the egos didn't even care about how much you had injured the kid! For them what you did was basically the equivalent of a scratch!

But of course! As soon as you got a little cut it was the end of the world!

(They had put you on bedrest for 3 days after a particularly nasty fall you took while practicing skateboarding tricks with Bing.)

If anything, they were probably more concerned about your bruised knuckles and jaw than the state of the injured kid.

Seriously, they were so frustrating sometimes.

Besides, lockdown for 5 months? You didn’t think you could handle it. You wouldn’t be suspended forever, and you were not going to miss half the year just because of one little fight. The longest you had even gone on lockdown was a month and a half! You nearly went insane during that, there was no way you would be able to go 5 months!

Just think of all the things you would miss! Not to mention how much harder it was to do your work if you weren’t in class!

(Ok that last one was a lie. Last time during lockdown, it had actually been easier to get work done. Someone would go and pick up whatever lesson or worksheet you were doing in class from the school and then you would do it at home, typically with the help of Google.)

(But still! You would miss out on nearly the rest of the year! And you didn’t think you would be able to stay sane on lockdown that long. It was unfair.)

Which is why, nearly as soon as Dark finished his statement, you were protesting.

“That’s not fair and you know it! 5 months! With lockdown status?!”

You were finally looking at him now, your disbelief and outrage giving you confidence to do so.

“I’ll go stir crazy if I have to stay stuck here this long! I’ll miss nearly the rest of the year! Not to mention I'll miss my friend's birthday party! I can't miss it! It’s their Quinceañera too!”

You would not allow yourself to miss it. You had begged for months in advance to be able to go. You already had picked out the perfect gift for your friend and everything! For fucks sake you had been there with thier family to help them pick out thier outfit!!!

They had told you about it months in advance, telling you with a slightly disappointed face that “it’s ok if you can’t come, I know how strict your parents are.” (From that day you vowed that you would be coming. Even if you had to fight your way to the party kicking and screaming.)

(The day you had gotten permission to go, you had walked up to them with the brightest grin. The way their eyes lit up and they smiled had almost made the months of begging and extra chores worth it.)

(You didn’t intend to break your vow, but with lockdown you might actually have to go kicking and screaming.)

The unfairness of the punishment was the only thing fueling your confidence. Said confidence quickly left your body as Dark looked at you, his form flickering into red and blue.

“This isn’t negotiable.”

Confidence returned with anger. You bit your lip to keep from yelling. With a deep sigh, you gathered your words together. Yelling and screaming wasn’t going to solve anything.

“It’s also not fair.” Ok bad start, a little too much snark in your tone with that sentence, tone it down. “I spent months doing extra chores and begging to go to the party. I don’t care about the rest of the things I'll miss, just at the very least let me go to the party. They're already expecting me.”

“Lockdown, 5 months. End of discussion.”

“But-!”

His auras flickered and the static in the room grew tenfold. He looked at you, with a look that said not to test him further.

“End of discussion.”

You grit teeth together, fists clenched because, it wasn’t fair! And he knew that!

With nothing else you could say, you all but stomped out of the room. Dark sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose as you left. God, now you are gonna be angry with him for a while. Meaning most of the egos would be upset with him as well.

He sighed. Maybe the 5 months lockdown was a little much, it wasn’t as if what you did wasn’t justified. If the kid had said it to you he probably would have been killed, (whether it was by Darks hands or one of the other egos. Actually the kid might still be killed for hitting you back, Dark remembered how your knuckles and jaw were already starting to bruise. Or perhaps it might just be for ruining your mood.)

It was then that Dark cursed softly under his breath as he realized he needed to check on Yan and Will to make sure they weren’t already leaving to kill the kid.

—<>—<>—<>—

You tried not to stomp as you made your way to your room. Even with your effort, you found your footsteps heavier than usual. No one tried to stop you as you went to your room, they knew to let you cool off for a while. You opened your door, and roughly shut it, locking it with a small “click.”

Once you were in your room you stood for a few moments, then you calmly walked over to your bed, and screamed into a pillow.

(You needed some way to get all your pent up anger out. You were angry at a lot of things, what Hernadnezz had said, the fact that you were grounded for 5 months, the fact that your punishment was totally unfair! Honestly, you were just upset with the whole situation.

You could only scream so much before your throat got tired.

With a huff, you walked over to your desk searching for a pen. You pulled out a familiar plain looking notebook, it wasn't intended but this notebook had become your vent notebook.

You started to scribble over the page with a pen, even ripping the paper at one point with how hard you were pressing. You would scribble out haphazardly words or explain your feelings or just in circles sometimes. It was a good way to get your anger out without it being destructive.

(You're pretty sure a lot of the egos had vent notebooks as well. Host had suggested having one and it didn’t take long for you to realize that the man had done the same for everyone in the house.)

(He had even been the one to give you a blank notebook and a box of pens.)

It wasn't long before tears started to fall onto the pages of the notebook.

You let your emotions overflow and decided to wallow in your feelings for a bit.

Furiously rubbing at your eyes, you curled up in bed and cried till you fell asleep.

–<>--<>--<>--

You didn't come down for dinner.

The way meals worked in the house was weird, everyone ate at separate times, some ordered, some cooked, and some people shared meals occasionally.

(There were typically groups, one group would be getting takeout from one place, another group at a different place, then there would be a group cooking, then there would be solo people who were just having dinner for themselves.)

There was the very rare instance where someone would be cooking, and then more and more people would help or ask for some until eventually everyone was eating together.

(Those days were always your favorites, they were so chaotic, everyone would be strewn about, some eating, some cooking and some just talking, you would always joke that it was a family reunion.)

(That was actually how these dinners had gotten their names, everyone now referred to them as reunion nights.)

(Of course there was also always the occasional barbeque, those were fun. They always ended in some fire or unexplainable disaster.)

It wasn't uncommon for you to not go down for dinner, as everyone always had dinner at different times.

Typically you would order something with Bing, or whatever ego was ordering a food you liked. You would sometimes get roped into making your meals with someone else though.

You had tried to make solo meals but every time you made something just for you, halfway through another ego would join you and the two or three of you would share.

The point is, it wasn't uncommon for you to not be downstairs for dinner. People would be in the kitchen as early as 6 and as late as 12 to make things. Tonight though, you were not a part of any of those groups. You also hadn't asked anyone if they wanted to order something with you.

Even when Yan had slipped a note under your door with the offer of ordering from your favorite place, you had not responded. (Normally it would be done through text but everyone knew Dark had your phone.)

Even as Goggle and Host made food in the kitchen, slowly getting most of the house roped into eating it or helping prep, (With the exception being Wilford and Yan who were ordering off the Denny's breakfast menu) you still didn't come down.

Bing, who was sitting on the couch, took a concerned look towards the stairs. He wasn't the only one, it was 9 now, and tonight it seemed like it was going to be a dinner reunion night, but you still weren't here.

(He knew how much you liked these dinners, they were a rarity and most of the time you dropped everything to attend them.)

You must have been really upset then.

Bing looked towards Yan who looked like it was physically painful for him to not run up the stairs to your room.

It seemed as though everyone was avoiding the stairs, anytime someone would get close the underlying tension in the room seemed to increase ten fold.

It wasn't long until the food was done, everyone was seated around the large dining table. Normally, everyone would be strewn about in the kitchen and living room, but right now this felt less like dinner and more like an impromptu meeting.

The tension in the air was thick, so thick that Willford quite literally started cutting at the air.

Bing didn't think he would ever be able to make sense of his reality bending abilities. (Then again, not even Wilford himself could make sense of them either.)

After getting a chunk of air, he cut off a slice, adding it onto the top of his pancake.

(The Denneys had just gotten here, Wilford had gotten pancakes with everything sweet on them, there were various fruits, whipped cream, icecream, sprinkles, syrup ext.. Yan had gotten chicken and waffles with bacon and hashbrowns as a side. Everyone else was eating the meal that Host and Goggle had made.)

Bing could hear Wilford say something along the lines of, “Nothing like a little tension on pancakes to get the blood pumping!” The man seemed to be oblivious of the tense mood, or maybe he simply just didn't care.

Bing technically didn't need to eat, but he was able to break down food to store as biofuel, so he supposed the mechanics were similar to how organic people did it.

Just his process was less necessary and much less messy.

(He knew goggle hated eating, the stuck up android didn't have taste buds like Bing, (something Bing made fun of him for daily) so for him it apparently was, in Goggles words, “A vile activity that he didn't see the need to partake in.”)

Bing grabbed himself a plate and sat down with the others, he was sitting next to Eric and Derek. At the head of the table, sat Dark, to the sides of him, Goggle and Host.

Bing started to eat his own food, it was pretty good, he noted that it was something Host had made before. It was the same meal that you and Host typically made together, it was one of your favorites but you never made it without Host.

Bing noted that there was a plate of food sitting on the counter, it even had a drink to go with it.

It looked like everyone had collectively agreed to leave you a plate, just in case you did happen to come down.

Everyone ate in silence, it was nothing like the usual dinner reunions, then again the key component to those reunions was missing.

Everyone kept taking glances towards the last seat available at the table. Your seat. Anytime you sat at the table, you always sat there. (Or the few times you would sit at the head of the table in Darks seat, just to annoy him.)

After 13 minutes of uncomfortable silence, Willford was the one to break it. Mouth full of pancakes and with whipped cream on his mustache he spoke,

“So where's the little devil themselves hmm?”

He was referring to you, one of his many nicknames for you was little tyke or something like it, in this case, little devil.

(He was also prone to things like gumdrop, tootsie roll, his nicknames were always the ones that never came to mind first.)

If the atmosphere was tense before then this was practically unbearable.

Everyone looked physically uncomfortable and was fidgeting.

Bing looked towards Eric who looked like he was going to start sobbing. He felt bad for the dude, he would offer to leave with him, but leaving right now seemed like a death sentence. (More so just going upstairs felt like one.)

Leave it to Wilford to say what they were all thinking. No one knew just what had happened in Darks office when you got back, only that you had practically stormed out of there and slammed your door.

Most of the egos didn't even know the specifics of what exactly you had done, they knew you got into a fight and were suspended but they didn't know why you had fought.

(Or why you were this upset, at the very least you would have grumpily come down for a reunion and gotten a plate before leaving.)

It was silent for a moment before Dark, without pausing in cutting his meal up, spoke,

“In their room. They are upset with their punishment.”

“Well” Wilford continued, asking the questions everyone else was too scared to ask “What's their sentence?”

Dark took a bite, Yan sipped at his drink nervously looking at Dark and the stairs, then Dark spoke in an even tone.

“Lockdown, 5 months.”

Then the chaos started.

Yan did a spit take and went to protest, the drink had hit Derek (Some of it also got on Bing but he didn't really care too much, he needed to wash this hoodie anyways)

Eric had tried to grab napkins to help his father dry off and in a panic had knocked over his drink right into one of the Goggles lap.

Eric then squeaked as the Goggle glared at him, somehow based on the way the Squirrel king looked up at Eric’s squeak, Eric had said something in squirrel, because soon there were a few squirrels running around.

The King tried to control his subjects that were in a panicked frenzy, Silver loudly saying some heroic speech then trying to help the King.

Willford was loudly protesting along with Yan, he had gotten a steak knife to cut his pancakes and was waving it haphazardly around.

Bing made eye contact (well not eye contact, Bing couldn't see his eyes though the bandages and Host couldn’t see at all) with Host, who was calmly narrating the chaos and his own opinion on the matter.

Ed, was for some reason yelling about something, and Bing turned to see the squirrels trying to steal his hat.

Bing got up, quickly moving away from the table as the squirrels dragged his plate away. He put his hands up in surrender, “It’s all yours little dude.”

He looked towards the door to see Annus standing there. He made eye contact with the man, before Annus apparently had the sense to walk away before anyone else noticed him.

Dr. liplier who had just gotten back from work, looked at the chaos with tired eyes, irritation clear on his face. He walked over to the table, grabbing Ed’s untouched plate, then left for his room.

Bing looked to see Darks face grow agitated. His red and blue aura’s flickered brightly before lashing out as he screamed, voice distorted,

“Enough!”

And just like that everyone seemed to pause with a flinch. His auras still flickered behind him but he now spoke in a calm voice, with just an undercut of threatening.

“I am not discussing this right now.” He looked towards mostly Yan and Will with a sharp glare. Will just huffed and muttered something along the lines of “someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed”, as he sipped on his Denny's sprite. Nonetheless he didn’t protest anymore.

Dark looked at the squirrels who were frozen with fear, “King, get these squirrels out of the house. Silver, help him.”

He took one final sweep of the area before pinching the bridge of his nose, “And someone clean this mess up. I’ll be in my study.”

With that he rose, leaving the room. Once he did everyone relaxed slightly, silently and slowly, people started moving again, each doing their respective tasks.

Bing looked at your plate then towards the stairs. He looked towards everyone, they were all shuffling to help clean up the remains of dinner.

…

Slowly Bing slipped out of the kitchen, unnoticed.

–<>--<>--<>--

It was 9:24 when you heard knocking on your door. You listened in without any real intent to open it.

By this point you could recognize most of the egos knocks, Goggles was a swift and efficient three knocks, Eric’s was always two soft ones so quiet you might miss it, Host always did one knock, then a pause, then two more, ext..

This time it seemed as if the person knocking was trying to be quiet, but failing. You didn't know who it was and you frankly didn't care. You rolled over to the side, facing away from the door.

After a few minutes the knocking stopped. You didn't feel up to talking with anyone right now. Or letting anyone see you right now, you're pretty sure your eyes were still red and your eyelashes were all clumped together.

Long story short, it was gonna be really obvious to anyone you saw that you had been crying.

You could hear the footsteps of someone walking away from your door.

You thought nothing of it and closed your eyes, trying to will yourself to sleep.

And then a few minutes later you could hear knocking again.

Only this time, it wasn’t at the door. You furrowed your eyebrows, looking confused towards your window.

Peeling the covers off your body, you moved towards the window, only to jump back as it opened and someone came tumbling in.

The person swore, or tried too but a beeping sound covered the word. Tumbling into your room was none other than Bing. He sat up on the ground, fixing his orange glasses. You started at him and he stared back in silence.

“Suhhhh dude.”

…

“What the fuck are you doing in my room?”

—<>—<>—<>—

You can’t believe you were roped into this. The logical part of your brain told you that this was a bad idea. Now while it was a risky, stupid, terrible, borderline idiotic idea that you knew you shouldnt go along with, you were feeling like a spiteful bitch right now. This little rebellion was exactly what you needed to satisfy the more spiteful parts of yourself.

Which is why you were tying your bedsheets together with Bing, movie style. To make sure your trusty rope didn't break, you had forced Bing to look up knot tying tutorials.

(Sometimes you forgot how useful being an android was, granted it had been a bit awkward having to watch the tutorials through his eyes. Seriously, you had to lean in uncomfortably close to be able to see the tiny screen.)

After about twenty minutes of practicing the knots, you had decided that you were confident enough in your skills. (Granted you were still nervous the knots would come undone halfway through climbing, you also wanted to stick it to Dark, so for now you decided your skills were good enough.)

Bing carefully looped another knot, the two of you worked in silence, not comfortable, but not uncomfortable. He raised his handiwork up towards you to inspect.

(You were sitting criss-crossed on the edge of your bed. Bing was sitting on the floor, leaning against your bed.)

You inspected it, giving a nod of approval. Then you went back to tying your part of the makeshift rope, with the two of you both working it didn't take long before the rope was done.

Bing held up the rope as you clung onto it like a fucking squriel. Bing swung the rope around a bit, testing how well it would hold your weight. The knots held and you scampered off, reaching to grab gloves so you didn't get carpet burn. (Or in this case bedsheet burn / rope burn.)

Pulling on the gloves, you turned to Bing, your voice was still a bit hoarse from crying when you spoke.

“So, are we doing this or what?”

“Aw yeah, dude.” Bing grinned, grabbing the makeshift rope and tying one end to your bed. He then threw the other end out of the window, with a sly (ergo; he was trying to look cool and just ended up having a dumb) grin, he began the climb down.

You waited, leaning out of the window, for Bing to get to the ground. He eventually made it, almost slipping and falling off the rope at one point.

He sent you a wink and another dumb grin when he managed to regain his balnace. You found yourself smiling despite this.

Once he made it, you then realized it was your turn.

It wasn't too high of a drop, luckily you weren't on the third floor, but it was still high enough to make you nervous.

You hesitated for a moment as Bing watched from below. He seemed to sense your hesitation and gave you a friendly smile, gesturing for you to come down.

When it seemed as though you weren't convinced, he opened out his arms in a “ill catch you” manner. It was silent reassurance that even if you did slip, he would be there to catch you.

With Bings reassurance, you left your room, slowly shimming down the makeshift rope.

You expected getting down to be harder. Not to say it was easy, far from it actually, but it was easier than you expected. (Gods, as much as you hated boot camp with Silver and Will, it was really paying off.)

(Doesn’t mean you would ever do it again though. In fact, just reliving the memories from boot camp filled you with a sense of dread. You grimaced and shook your head to rid yourself of the memories. You could relive your traumatic training another day.)

Even with the gloves you have on (cause god forbid Bing let your poor hands get the slightest of rope burn) you're able to keep a pretty good grip on the makeshift rope.

You’re making good progress, in fact you’re almost all the way down, about 6 to 8 feet from the floor when things start to go very wrong.

One of the king's squirrels is on your rope.

You, having been focused on getting down, panic for a second when something fuzzy brushes your hand. Instinctively you pull your hand away making the squirrel scatter at your sudden moments.

You can’t afford to worry about the panicking squirrels though because as fast as lighting you're grabbing onto the now swinging rope. (It swings due to your now shifted weight. and unbalanced weight.)

The squirrel panics more now that the rope is moving wildly and it crawls over you in a frenzy, in turn causing you to panic more because you’re gonna fucking fall!

Your knuckles hurt from how tightly you're gripping onto the rope.

In your panicked state you failed to see Bing moving throughout the chaos. He moves under you aiming to catch you and to stop the rope from swinging.

But Bing’s attention is split, because now that the rope has moved the both of you are very clearly visible from one of the living room windows.

He holds his arms up to catch you while nervously glancing towards the window.

Meanwhile inside there Eric and Willford sit, or more so Eric stiffly sits on the couch while Will paces behind it. He wildly waves his hands, and a pink revolver gun, around in the air while ranting.

Eric is incredibly tense and it doesn't take a genius to figure out he wants to leave.

(It seems impossible how stiff he is, he looks like he’s frozen in fear. A fair response to an annoyed Willford.)

“I mean don’t get me wrong!” Wilford says in his strange accent. “I’m happy the little devil has to stay home, but i just don’t get what Darky’s getting at here!” He waves his gun around more.

“I mean that kid was the wise guy that decided to upset them! Really the audacity of some people.” He waves his gun around in the air.

“I mean i would have shot him for that,” he gestures to himself with the gun, it’s at this moment Eric notices movement out the window.

Him and Bing make eye contact.

Bing who is currently trying to help you down from a swinging rope.

Bing who is sneaking you out, making gestures at Eric to not say anything.

Bing whose attention is split.

Before Eric can react you're falling onto Bing with a thud.

A loud thud.

Willford starts to turn his head with a question of “what was that?”

And Eric fucking panics.

“I-I heard that the- the kid- gave them a bruised jaw!” He blurts out in a panic.

Willford looks at him, eyebrows furrowed end oh god he does not look happy and holy shit Eric totally may have just doomed this Hernandez kid and fuck does this make Eric an aconplaince to murder he just sent fucking Wilford Warfstache after the poor kid-

“-that from?”

Shit.

Eric shoves his panic attack down and looks at Willford like a deer in headlights.

He stutters out an illegible sentence trying to figure out what Will asked him.

“What little birdie did you hear that from?” Willford repeats, he is now wiping his pink gun with the end of his, now untucked, shirt.

“i- uh- i um,” Eric gulps nervously, his throat feels tight. “i was there when um Bim answered the phone.”

He nervously picks at his nails, it was a bad habit that he was working on breaking but right now he didn’t care.

Will frowns, then hums. Eric takes a glance towards the window, he sees you sitting up and holding onto your head, you look dazed. Bing gets up soon after, he shakes his head, a few leaves falling out when he does so, and then he is holding your face making sure you're ok.

“Are you looking at something?”

When Eric looks back he flinches. It’s like a jump scare seeing Willford leaned in close to him.

He scrambled back pushing himself to the other end of the couch. Will just stares and blinks.

“You should see a doctor about your low attention span.” He nods seriously after he says this and Eric is literally too scared to speak.

He can’t take his eyes off the bubblegum looking man. Despite how goofy and silly he looks, Eric knows better. (The man in front of him may not look visually intimidating but he was one of the scariest egos in this house.)

Willford blows a raspberry and continues speaking. “Pah well,” he puts his hands on his hips and stands back up to his normal posture, “As i was saying! I just don’t understand what Darky is doing!”

He goes back to pacing about again and Eric doesn’t know whether to sigh in relief now that the man isn’t focused on him, or to scream because he now has to stay longer.

Eric risks a glance towards the window.

He finds Bing helping you up and scanning you up and down. You give him a disgruntled thumbs up. Eric can see the way Bing relaxes with relief.

Bings eyes flutter to Eric. He gives a sheepish grin and mouths “suhh dude” while shaking his hand in greeting. (It’s in the surfer boy pose, with the only fingers up being the pinky and middle.)

Eric has never wanted to inflict physical violence on someone before this day.

He watches as you catch sight of him watching. He sees the way your eyes go wide and you look at Bing for a split second with a look that can only be described as ‘OH SHIT-!’ and then you break out into a lopsided awkward grin.

You know, the type of grin you give when you know that you’ve just been caught doing something you weren't supposed to.

Say for example- oh i dunno- Sneaking out!

Eric sends you a ‘really! Are you seriously doing this? You do realize if your get caught then you’re dead!!!’ look.

You in turn look between him and Will then send him back a, ‘yeah but now you’re an accomplice’ look.

He sends you a wide eyed urgent look that is the equivalent of him yelling your name.

You look at him pleading.

Oh no.

It’s the face.

Eric can’t bring himself to look away from you.

Eventually he does and he briefly sees you light up with happiness. God damn it why did you have to be so good at those damn puppy eyes.

(Eric is a weak man.)

He looks back in time to see you and Bing running away from the window.

And as he watches you both go, he can’t help but worry.

(His worry spikes when he watches you trip over your own feet and absolutely eat shit.)

“-hurt my gumdrop! You know what I mean?” And now Wilfords attention is back on Eric. Will moves his gun to point limply at Eric when he questions him.

Eric’s eyes lock onto the bubblegum pink revolver and the only response he can muster is a fearful sob.

Will blinks.

Eric stays paralyzed in fear.

Neither move for what feels like hours. (seriously Eric’s eyes are starting to tear up because he hasn’t blinked in so long.)

“I’ll take that as a yes!” Will continues his over dramatic antics and Eric settles down. (This was gonna be a long night for him wasn't it?)

—<>—<>—<>—

After getting back up from absolutely eating shit, you tumbled forward with Bing and then made a fucking sprint across the open lawn towards the tree line.

Once you got there, you could follow the old dirt road to the main gate, and then walk across the highway to the skate park.

You joked the whole way there and even threatened to push Bing into oncoming traffic a few times. (Yeah sure a few.)

It wasn’t long before the two of you reached the skate park, it was completely empty. (Reasonably so at this time of night.)

You and Bing spent awhile just fucking around and hanging out there. You would watch Bing do some tricks, occasionally he would teach you one on his skateboard, but mainly you just sat and talked.

It was nice. Helped to calm you down, especially the late atmosphere, just something about the night really helped you. Maybe it was the air.

The night air made your face cold but it felt good in a soothing type of way. It helped cool down your red eyes and hot tears. You yawned a bit, realizing how tired you were. At this point you were mentally and physically exhausted and it was getting late.

Softly muttering to Bing, you asked the time, to which he replied by telling you it was 11 o’ clock. (11:07 to be exact.)

Bing, for as much as he was air-headed, was also quite observant.

(Due to his demeanor people seemed to forget he was also an android just like Google and therefore also had the whole internet at his fingertips. His scanners, while not exactly like goggles, were still on a similar level as Goggles. Meaning they were still incredibly high tech.)

Due to this he noticed your droopy eyes and quiet yawns.

He suggested that the both of you start heading back but you didn’t want to go back just yet.

But god were you tired.

But when you got back you would have to deal with the consequences of sneaking out.

But it would mean you get to sleep.

Consequences.

but… sleep.

Your mind was a battlefield as you had an internal struggle. You did wanna go home and sleep but you didn’t think you could emotionally handle the repercussions of sneaking out right now. If anyone had found out you and Bing snuck out, you were screwed. You wanted to say you regret it but…

You sleepily look towards Bing who is attempting to do that skateboard trick.

Your face contorts into a small smile as you watch him.

It was nice hanging out with Bing. You didn’t regret a thing.

You decided to tell Bing about your dilemma. You didn’t really know the specifics of how exactly you got here, but you were now in his arms, bridal style.

(It had happened as you explained your plight while trying to do a trick.)

(With your focus split on explaining your conflicting thoughts to Bing, and trying not to fall asleep, you had tripped and nearly fallen face first into the bowl. Before you had even registered what happened, Bing was by your side, picking you up.)

Without your control your body had relaxed into Bings arms. Normally you might complain that you were too old for this, (He was holding you like you were a toddler after all) but, you were mentally and physically exhausted, so you let it slide.

You were fighting sleep, willing your eyes to stay open when Bing started to hum a funky tune. He was saying something but it fell of deaf ears.

You finally gave in and closed your eyes. It wasn’t long before you drifted into unconsciousness.

Bing, who was mid-way talking about what would happen when you got back, realized you hadn’t answered his question. He had asked if you wanted to stop for something to eat before you went back home.

(You typically had a snack right after school and you weren’t able to eat one today as when you got home you had immediately gone to Dark. You had also skipped Dinner, so Bing figured that the two of you could stop by a pizza place or something.)

He looked down at you, only to find you resting soundly in his arms.

Man you really clocked out, I mean he expected it, but not that fast, you must have been really tried.

Trying to be quiet, Bing walked over and picked up his skateboard. (The both of you had been using it to do tricks though, he was considering getting you your own skateboard. Maybe for a birthday or something, cause you seemed to enjoy practicing. At the very least it would give him an excuse to hang out with you more.)

He smiled, imagining teaching you more sick tricks then quickly got back on track. Now was not the time to think of new tricks, not while you were sleeping in his arms.

You were at your most vulnerable right now, so he was gonna get you back safely. (It was kinda shocking just how vulnerable humans, especially adolescents, were.)

He sifted you in his arms so he could grab his skateboard. He did this all without breathing, as to not rouse you.

(Technically he didn’t need to breathe anyway but he did it to make everyone around him more comfortable. It’s the same reason he blinked.)

He slowly slid his headphones over your ears. After scrolling a bit, he pulled up one of your video game OST playlists.

(While there wouldn’t be too many cars on the highway, there would still be some and he would hate for you to wake up because some asshole decided to rev their engine a bit too loud.)

That’s when Bing began the trek home, his trusty skateboard and you in his arms.

(He made sure to walk with extra care, considering he had two of his greatest treasures in his arms. Honestly it was a wonder he even let you use his skateboard, he carried the thing around practically everywhere and him letting you use it really spoke volumes about how much he cared for you.)

Bing continued to humm his Funky tune, it was one of the songs he had been meaning to show you actually. Maybe he could do that tomorrow.

That is, if he wasn’t dead by then. He grimaced a bit, realizing that, now that you were asleep, he would be the sole person to deal with the aftermath of sneaking you out.

(There would be no way in hell that he would mention how Eric helped you. Bing wasn’t gonna sell him out like that.)

God. The others were gonna kill him.

He looked down at your peaceful form.

Well, better him than you.

And that was how the night ended. With “Big Brother Benji” carrying you home.

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darkiplierxreader · 3 years ago

Text

━"Manning The Mics"

━Tw: None

━Notes: I have delted this over five times on accident. If there's any typos- too bad so sad I'm never revisiting this. It took so long ;-;

━Song: "Why Am I Anxious" By Tom Cardy

"You know I have the power to fire you right."

Giggles filled with pure mirth came from (Y/n) as they tried not to double over, staring at their unamused boss, whom, was covered head to toe in sticky notes.

Their record for how many post-it notes they could place on one person had been 18. Had been.

Now it was a whopping 23.

As one could clearly tell if they took one look at the man in front of (Y/n).

You know, suprisingly, working at a studio downtown dedicated to airing a local t.v channel wasn't all that entertaining. Especially when someone like (Y/n)—who had mounds of untapped potential according to the company—was stuck wiping the dust off of camera lenses instead of putting their four years at college to use.

What's the use of going to school for a degree in sound design if they didn't even use it.

So they had to find a way to spice up their day to day routine. That didn't involve loitering around the snack table untill the day ended. (The coffee tasted like shit anyways.) What better way than slapping half a pad of post-its on your co-workers.

"If I didn't like you so much I would have kicked you out a long while ago."

(Y/n) paused their laughing fit to swipe dramatically at the corner of their eyes, pretending to wipe a tear away.

"Yeah. But you wouldn't want to get rid of 'one of the most talented workers you've seen in years'. Your words not mine." They clasped their hands together with an overdone grin, looking up at their (still) uninterested boss. He just grumbled at them in response.

Honestly Robert wasn't a bad supervisor. He never yelled at anyone, only tossing the occasional death glare when people needed to be reminded of things. Which was much appreciated concidering his sagging eyebags and sardonic demeanor made it seen like he would and could snap at the smallest thing.

He was pretty nice to (Y/n) anyways. Treated them like a hyper cousin. You know; the one you always saw getting yelled at by their mom at family gatherings because they put a whoopee cushion on someone's seat.

"Listen. I didnt call you in here to talk about, er, this." Robert plucked a blue sticky note off his temple, crumbling the material up into a ball and flicking it across the room.

It landed in the waste bin by his desk perfectly, making (Y/n) widen their eyes with an entertained smile. Robert didn't share their enthusiasm.

"I got an email from HQ this morning. One of the cast members saw you, ah 'performing by the water cooler' the other day so to speak, and wanted to meet you for something in building 2M today. As in, fifteen-minutes-from-right-now today."

(Y/n) saw a flash of remorse pass across his eyes. His tone was gentler now. The kind of gentle tone people use when they tell you your dog was just run over by a steam roller.

They felt their heart drop, face twisting into an unpleasant expression.

It had just been a bit of goofing off. Balancing a cherry on their nose before popping it in their mouth and tying the stem like a magician presenting their next trick—that kind of stuff. They didn't even know a cast member would be there. If so they would have used one of their sick days ahead of time. (Can you blame them. No one wants to be in the same room as their boss when their working.)

"Do you know who saw-"

"No. I don't know. I'm sorry (Y/n)." Robert's lips twitched down into a frown full of sympathy. He reached out to place a hesitant pat on their arm, the gesture holding a lot more meaning than anyone would think.

"If they try to fire you, quit before they can. That's business 101."

Well that certantly made them feel a lot better.

"Thanks. Want me to just hand in my resignation now or-?"

"Shut up (Y/n)." He rolled his eyes. But there was no annoyance behind it.

"You need to get going anyways. And-" He rubbed the back of his neck.

"-good luck."

"Just make sure my headstone looks nice and neat alright?"

"Fuck off."

Offices surrounded by glass should be illegal.

That's all that was going through (Y/n)'s brain as they walked through the winding hallways of headquarters. More specifically building M2.

They could see everything going on in the rooms due to those stupid glass walls, yet nothing at the same time. It was anxiety inducing.

But also what-the-fuck inducing.

A man with a cowboy hat, sunglasses, and atrocious mouth mullet was talking to a group of terrified looking people in one area while waving around what was, hopefully, a fake gun.

In the room next to him was a masked figure in a skin tight black body suit, posing like a superhero while resting their comically large hands by his hips. They almost looked to be roleplaying if anything.

The company didn't talk about this in the introduction video.

What room were they supposed to be in again? The lady at the front desk had said the one with the cream walls right? Or was it gray-

They let their feet lead them down a few more twists and turns while trying not to think about it too much. The contents in the rooms only got more bizarre as they went, albeit less and less people occupying them untill no one was left.

The journey only paused when a room on their right came up, big bold letters above it reading Conference Room.

Hey, that room looked cream colored enough.

(Y/n) pushed the glass door open, head popping in as they scanned the contents of the place. Just as their view from the outside suggested, no one was in there.

"Yeah. Okay. That's great. Invite me up here why don't you. Give me a heart attack why don't you. Make sure not to show up before me why don't you."

Their words were full of nerves, bones in their neck popping as they cracked it anxiously.

Who exactly was the cast again? They knew the general idea that surrounded all of them. The Big Men. The bosses. The people who ran this entire company in their free time.

Wispers about who exactly they were ran rampant on set some days. How one was a demon. The other was an insane pink Willy Wonka. Someone even had a thoery that they were all just fragments of one mans mind, which was met with as many eyerolls and scoffs as one would think.

Honestly (Y/n) had never paid much attention to any of the theories. They were never gonna meet the guys in charge anyways, so why bother? They'd much rather spend their time getting their job done quickly so they could spend the rest of their shift goofing off.

But now, walking around the oval shaped table and eyeing the place skeptically, they wish they had listened in to those conversations.

"Ah! Wonderful! We were wondering when you would show up sugarplum!"

(Y/n) nearly jumped three feet in the air, whirling around to the source of their sudden spike in heart rate.

Right where seconds ago no one had been sitting were six individual men surrounding the brown table.

Everyone looked the same. But different. It was a wonder how they had never really seen any of them before, despite working on set and them being the 'main cast'.

They all were staring straight at (Y/n), who swore their face lost all color at the attention.

Each one was dressed in different attire, ranging vastly from suits to hospital scrubs. A couple of them even looked to be glitching. Or was that buffering? They couldn't tell.

"Well come on! Sit down sit down. There's a chair right next to Bim and Hosty right there!"

Their eyes flickered to the enthusiastic man with messy brown hair, his voice slurred as if he'd been drinking. A pink tinted mustache moved with his words, which they couldn't help but stare at for a moment.

Nonetheless they listened, walking over to the chair he spoke of and slowly sitting down. If they hadnt felt small enough being stared at by six separate pairs of eyes, they certantly did now.

The one—Hosty he had been called?—on their left was a man in a light brown trench coat. He was rather handsome looking, albeit solom. He had a bandage around his head, weaving through his dark tresses and covering his vision. There looked to be dried blood stains where his eyes were, causing them to wonder how he could even see them.

"The Host thinks it's rude to stare."

(Y/n) quickly looked away at their words, choosing instead to eye the other man beside their seat.

Not like they had much of a chance to before a hand was shoved in their face.

"HI! Bim here. Bim Trimmer. Extrodinare in everything! That's Bim Trimmer. B-I-M, T-"

"Alright that's enough Bim. You're startling them." Someone said with a sigh.

The hand pointing straight inbetween the area of their eyes slowly reclined, Bims smile still ever present—if a bit forced now.

Who the absolute hell were these people.

"Wilford, why exactly are we all here?"

"Ah, yes. That!"

(Y/n)s eyes furrowed in the slightest, shifting in their seat as they watched the smiling man shuffle around for some papers. His tounge would come out and lick his lips occasionally and they tried not to acknowledge Wilfords little wink when he noticed them looking.

He then slammed a file decorated with stickers down on the table, patting it gently as if he didn't just completely demolish it against the furnitures surface.

"(Y/n) (L/n)! Works in building 4A, mic check crew. Born in Nevada, moved to Ohio to pursue their career in sound design! An adventurous little thing."

"We know Wilford. I recal reading the report on their interview. A very interesting one." A very monotone voice said, before screaming.

(Y/n)s eyes widened as a red and blue verson of the person across from them split in the air, howling. They looked to be in the worst pain imaginable. It was enough to make (Y/n) forget about the mention of their rather embarassing interview. (Let's just say the janitor had to stay overnight that day)

And then the figures were gone.

"Host notices (Y/n) jump. He wishes tell them that they were not imagining that. It is simply Dark becoming a bit aggitated."

Alright. So that made no sense. Perfect.

How to deal with this. Avoid eye contact? No they were already doing that. Music? Earbuds were in the car damnit. Oh-

Humor.

"So, is this gonna be done by my lunch break, because I have some tofu in the fridge I really can't let sit too long. Last time that happened I had to quarantine for a few months and oh boy-"

Their words faded the more they talked, nerves increasing by the moment.

Alright so no jokes. Tough crowd.

"Are you going to fire me? Becuase if so I quit first."

That made Wiford let out a hearty laugh, a few others joining in with small chuckled. Even the monochrome ones lips tilted up slightly, his expression having been stony untill now.

"Fire you? Why of course not! On the contrary sugar! Here, have some candy."

Before (Y/n) could say anything in retaliation a lollipop was shoved forcefully in their mouth. They gagged on it slightly, muffling out a 'hey!' as the sweet flavor coated their tounge.

Wilford just winked.

Host quietly narrated their flushed face with a slight tilt of his head.

They worked the treat around with their tounge, successfully muted as Wilford continued to go on a rant, pacing around the room and its inhabitants. Tossing out reasons why he had called them all up here with the occasional off topic discussion.

"-ut (Y/n) we were wondering if you'd like to come work in our building! On Warfstashe Tonight to be specific." He finally finished, filling with his suspenders and leaning down to look them in the eye with half closed lids.

He was so close, they could have stuck him in the eye with the end of their lollipop stick—and honestly was thinking about it just to see what would happen. So thank god for Host.

"The Host feels a bit neglected when Wilford fails to mention his podcast."

"Yeah, what The Host said. I'm Bim Trimmer! The Bim Trimmer! I need a mic guy too for my show about me! Bim!"

"They could help me with my diagnosis'. It's always more fun to tell people that their dying with an audience."

"I-I have no-o use f-for a us-seless huma-an."

Fuck you too blue shirt guy.

"Settle now." The dark man said again. Wait, dark? Dark.

(Y/n) thought someone had called him that. Strange name. However, it fit them.

"Wilford I recommend you stop playing with this poor human and get on with it. We can all figure out a schedule later. We've already confused them enough."

"You're no fun Darky." Wilford pouted, snatching the lollipop right out of (Y/n)'s mouth and placing it in his own. He sighed as he walked away, licking it at his leisure.

They blinked at the unsanitary action.

"But fiiiiine. Meeting dismissed. That means you too bubblegum. I can escort you out to your car if you'd like."

The pinkette was smiling at them innocently while twirling the spit coated treat around in his hand. But with the way Wilford looked them up and down they felt like he wanted to do more than just escort them to their car.

By now most of the other members at the table had gotten up to leave, shuffling around and making small talk amongst themselves. Not many spared an extra glance at (Y/n). Which they were thankful for. Their head was already spinning a little.

"Uh, no thanks Wilford. I'll just go back to my erm, building now." They declined his offer as politely as possible.

"You have some important tofu waiting for you if I'm not mistaken." Dark smoothed down his suit as he stood up, red and blue iris' boring into (Y/n)s own as he spoke. They had forgotten he was even there, which unnerved them a little. Silent guy.

"Uh, yes. Yes. That's it. Mhm yes totally. Tofu. I'll go get that and then I'll just- see what's left to do around here." (Y/n) stuffed their hands into their pockets, already starting to inch towards the door stiffly.

Wilford whined once or twice. But the glass door slammed in his face before any real words could make it out of his mouth, (Y/n)s pace increasing as they sped walked away with eyes as big as dinner plates.

They mentally thanked Dark for an opportunity out of there. They had never had trouble socializing in any sort of way, but in that room being offered so many promotions—could they even be called promotions if you're just thrust into the job—it felt more like they were being cooed and ogled at by a bunch of higher beings. Mainly Wilford.

But- whatever. They would do their research. The deranged Willy Wonka theory didn't seem too crazy anymore.

For now though–

–they were really craving a lollipop.

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