daturida

[daturida]

hey! i'm not sure if anyone is even still around here. it's been 5+ years, i bought a house, got engaged, developed my prefrontal cortex etc. etc. i still love furuta / tg, so if anyone's still around and wants to catch up, my discord is pomelheim!

---

anyway, the other reason i wanted to log in here: to the person who's lifting posts from this blog for a twitter portrayal, you're such a fucking loser lmao

like this one doesn't even make sense outside of the AU context it was written. even took the ooc text!

this one's just funny because i made this with a crytyper generator, it's just a slider. the chance of you just "happening" to land on the same value is next to none

this one is just a rewrite of this headcanon. you actually merged it with another one for the head comment, good job

you get the point.

furuta is a really fun character to write/explore, hence why i put so much time into it. a lot of the stuff here was written before the manga ended, so it was a lot of interpreting and coming up with my own spin on it as and when chapters released. i don't mind taking inspo, he's a canon character so there will always be similarities, but this isn't that because you're even taking what i wrote out of character in the tags. i'd even understand if you came to the same conclusions of his character (i'm assuming we both read the same manga) but you didn't. you just took what i wrote, sometimes word for word. and not just my stuff, but the stuff my friends wrote too, for AUs we made together.

yeah, it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. none of it does, it's just roleplay, we're strangers on the internet pretending to be anime characters for a laugh. but i put a lot of time and love into this character, both by myself and with my friends in the tg rpc. i have really fond memories here, this blog/series got me through some really hard times. so, forgive me if i'm not overjoyed to see it bastardised elsewhere in the year 2025.

[daturida]

im the sexiest bitch in this secret government containment facility

[daturida]

@penitentprodigy

this makes me really happy omg it's so so great that you've gotten to this point and moved up so far in both your career and your personal life. you were always one of my favorite people to see on my dash and it's so great to see you again! thank you for sharing this with us and welcome back!! also if it means anything i think we've all stopped taking rp seriously and just do whatever the hell we feel like for fun lmao and i think that's how it should be <3

OOC. it makes me so happy to see that you’re still around! i was thinking about you earlier, hope everything is going well! and i think it’s good that roleplay overall has become more relaxed, there’s always been an air of it being like a career rather than just a hobby lmao. the second you start feeling guilty about not being active is the point it stops being fun imo.

[daturida]

tentatively lifts hiatus?

OOC. i kinda wanna talk about where i’ve been, and why i haven’t been here. my life has changed a lot since i made this blog in sept 2016. 

tl;dr : lifting hiatus, not promising anything, just wanna enjoy myself so no pressure.  i can’t guarantee i’ll be consistent, but i don’t really care either. i just wanna have fun :o)

i made this blog when i was really struggling with myself. i’ve made no secret of the fact that writing furuta helped me overcome my own trauma and my own anger towards my perpatrators. i needed to see a character like myself to get a good model for what was good/bad about having these feelings. before, i was just angry at myself and hurting myself. now i don’t feel like a victim anymore and that’s what i needed to alleviate the self-hatred. i had control, it wasn’t taken from me, i’ve always had control in every situation. i did what i could with the control i had, and i did what i thought was the best thing to do. i wouldn’t have come to that conclusion without writing furuta -- at least, not so soon.

in a more practical sense, i finished university in that time and got my degree, and i started a full-time job at a games company. that job is really demanding, and sometimes it eats into my personal time. i love my job a lot, but i’ve recently gotten more responsibility now i got made perm and i’m managing more people. i love investing in the projects i’m working on, so i give it my all. i play the games i work on at home for fuck’s sake haha, i really want to see these projects do well. so my time is often spent decompressing from that, or investing in that.

so it left me at a weird point in my life. my career is starting and my mental health is recovering (somewhat). i didn’t... need the distraction anymore. i used this blog to escape from how miserable i was in university, with myself, with my lack of achievements. i think i wanted to say it was just time constraints that kept me from writing, but it was more personal than that.

i didn’t know what to write because i didn’t feel bad anymore. how do i write the character that i turned to when i felt bad, when i don’t feel bad anymore? i felt like i had an obligation to write furuta in that horrible way he is, and i could do it then, because i felt so horrible and low. it’s not that i wrote myself when i wrote him, i really really dislike that, but it’s more that it was easy to pull from my own experiences. there were a few months where my characterisation was great, but that’s because i was so fuckin sad lmao. 

anyway. the point i want to get to is i want to come back to him. i love this character. a whole fucking lot. i love tokyo ghoul, even if i disagree with the ending, i still love it. but i have a different perspective now, and i think that’s good, because i feel less involved with everything i write. i feel less pressured. i’m going to be slow at first, and it may never pick up. but that’s alright, because i do this for fun lmao

[daturida]

tiny update

yooo, still on hiatus but i guess just checking in to say i’m alive. i got made permanent at my job (i got my name on 4 shipped games! i got a physical switch copy of one of them! it’s rly cool hhhhh) but it takes up a lot of my time. i’m pretty much putting my personal time into staying alive (groceries, cleaning, sleeping etc.) and drawing occasionally, so idk when/if i’ll be back here. dm me for discord if you wanna catch up?

either way, hope you’re all well and that life is treating you kindly.

[daturida]

[daturida]

independent OGURI MUSHITAROU of bungou stray dogs / as penned by syd

[daturida]

finding starters ppl wrote for me 3 months ago that i never even liked..... fuck .....

[daturida]

favorite lit quotes ➤ vicious, v.e. schwab

[daturida]

Uh I love you so much I wish I could talk to you more you are my beautiful wife whom I love ur art and writing are AMAZING

2018 IS ALMOST OVER MEME

TEM MI WIFE............ im so glad we’re still talking like literally 2 years after we met?? i found ‘soft hunge’ the other day from the old old old gc and yeeted. thank u for continuing to fill my life with tsun tsun tem and ur amazin self..... u deserve so many good things and i hope 2019 is kinder to you wtf

[daturida]

Hewwo I'm here for the end of 2018 meme to say that although I'm horrid at answering IMs in a timely manner I truly appreciate your presence on here and all the things you've done with fruitfuck! I'll always aspire to put the same amount of thought and depth into my ocs as you've put into Furuta. I hope 2019 treats you well! <3

2018 IS ALMOST OVER MEME

CIRQUE!!! TAKES UR HANDS AND KISSES THEM.......... likewise, my love!! i love seeing you on my dash in any capacity, may you continue to bring ur amazin ocs, laughs n tears to the remaining rp comm of tunglr! ur gonna kick 2019s ass, bitch doesnt stand a chance :o)

[daturida]

(logged in on the wrong blog, but from youngscion, post-canon emo or whatever tbh ahxhsh) "I think I loved you, for a while there. Or at least it felt like love."

2018 IS ALMOST OVER MEME

LOVE.

The word simultaneously excites and disgusts him. Nauseous and ignited all at once. protectively holds his stomach and lets out a bark-like laugh, other hand raising to tuck his hand behind his ear. Wants you to see his every expression for this. Face contorts from laughter to pity in mere seconds -- ‘ You mean you’re capable? Is it not just utter devotion for you? Hasn’t it always been? ’ 

But they are like mirror images. Scorning the other would mean scorning himself ( and had he himself ever felt anything other than everything? ) and its at that thought that he lets out another laugh, descending into a snicker. Did they always have to be on the same page? Maybe it was love. What would he have known?

LOVE is a word that frightens Furuta. Makes him want to peel his skin off and scoop out his very core just to get the ‘icky’ out of him. Ew. Ew. Ew. Maybe their plotting, their scheming, their late nights mulling over wine like a subverted tryst, had been love. What would he had known? It’s not like he was an expert. All he had ever know was utter devotion. One and only. All and everything. The sheer prospect of their rendezvous’ being more than just tactical have him second-guessing their entire relationship. Associates? Colleagues? Partners? (In crime only, surely?). 

Furuta is not laughing anymore. He purses his lips. He had relied on him to pull the strings from the inside when he could not. Only puppet strings. Just puppet strings. On that note, had he ever put the same level of trust into anyone else to carry out some of his best work? ‘ In that case, I can only feel pity for you. It’s a sickly feeling, isn’t it? ’

Maybe it was love. What would he have known?

[daturida]

Bold the “bad” habits your muse has!

nail biting | throat clearing | lying | interrupting | chewing the ends of pens | smoking | swearing | knuckle cracking | thumb sucking | muttering under their breath | talking to themselves | nose picking | drinking | oversleeping | snacking between meals | skipping meals | picking at skin | impulse buying | talking with their mouth full | humming/singing to themselves | chewing gum | leg jiggling | foot tapping | hair twirling | whistling | eye rolling | licking lips | sniffing | squinting | rubbing hands together | jaw clenching | gesturing while talking | putting feet up on tables | tucking hair behind ears | chewing lips | putting hands on hips | rubbing the back of their neck | being late | procrastinating | doodling | shredding paper | peeling off bottle labels | forgetfulness | running hands through hair | overreacting | teeth grinding | nostril flaring | slouching | pacing | drumming fingers | fist clenching | pinching bridge of nose | rubbing temples | rolling shoulders

tagged by: @furnezh !

tagging: MMMMMMMMMM STEAL IF U WANNA

[daturida]

2018 is almost over!

Send the mun or muse something that you’ve wanted to say to them this year but didn’t have the chance to!

[daturida]

[daturida]

MOBILE DATING GAME: NIMURA FURUTA ROUTE!

TAGGED BY: @furnezh THANK UUUU BAby U ARE MY ANGEELLL TAGGING: i meAN feel free to steal hehehe

ROUTE START:  ❝ Really? This is what you’re into? Alright - action! ❞ ROUTE SWITCH:   ❝ It’s all gonna be the same outcome anyway, so have at it... ❞

MENU INTERFACE, POKE A:  ❝ Can I be of help? ❞ MENU INTERFACE, POKE B:   ❝ Is this important? I’m kinda busy right now! ❞ [ day ] / ❝ If I should be sleeping right now, then you definitely shouldn’t be here. ❞ [ night ] MENU INTERFACE, POKE (REPEATEDLY): ❝ Persistent little thing, aren’t you? ❞ MENU INTERFACE, POKE MAX ♥:  ❝ Okay. Now you have my attention! ❞

COMPLETED SCENE, +♥:   ❝ Hey, you stuck to the script! Cue good route! ❞ COMPLETED SCENE, -♥:   ❝ Uh oh. That wasn’t in the script. You sure you’ve played one of these before? ❞

GIFT (NEUTRAL): ❝ Thank you! ❞ I hate it. GIFT (DISLIKED):   ❝ Thank you so much! ❞ I hate it. GIFT (LIKED):  ❝ Eh... it’s quite nice. ❞ Would examine it closely. GIFT: (THEIR BIRTHDAY):  Somewhat disappointed. ❝ I get the feeling you don’t really know me that well. ❞

BIRTHDAY:   ❝ I hear it’s someone’s Special Day. I hope you like clowns... ❞

[daturida]

seeing my own art on my dash  (´• ω •`)