davunathen

[davunathen]

013125

we'll see if i stick with this, but: tumblr is more and more seeming like the easiest and most future-proof place to connect with people, and share longer-form, more nuanced content without being subject to (as much of) an algorithm? i'm hoping this remains true. i've been feeling for a while like maybe i should try to write about the mundane day-to-day process of my phd program. maybe by yapping about my likely boring experience while keeping it as real and informal as possible, maybe that will help someone else feel less alone or like an imposter? so, hello! i'm a 30-something, neurodivergent, queer (she/they) phd student studying microbiology for a little over four months now :~)

maybe it's my less-than-traditional background, my specific flavor of neurodivergence, or just plain going into this degree from a separate STEM field and playing catch-up at the phd level, but i do feel a smothering amount of isolation and imposter syndrome. but the feeling of constant struggling in silence makes a certain logical sense, given how academia operates---STEM in particular. but also: thousands of people would not be graduating with doctorates every year if this were impossible, and people only get accepted to phd programs if they qualify and deserve to be there, regardless of how incompetent or like an imposter they feel.

i have to keep reminding myself of these things, so just in case, i'll say it here, in case you need to some reminding too.

we're all out here, working hard, and i believe in all of us <3