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The single greatest picture ever taken in my life. We threw Yu-gi-oh cards at the ceiling fan to watch them scatter, and just happened to take a picture right at this exact moment. To this day, this is the only time I’ve ever heard of anyone breaking a ceiling fan blade with cards.

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a few doors down from me my neighbors have a squirrel bar nailed to the tree in front of the sidewalk, not exactly this but something like this:

it's been there for years and they never "stock" it so it's just sitting there. anyway, i thought it would be cute to make a little squirrel out of sculpey and leave it on one of the stools in the middle of the night. i also made a little sculpey beer bottle with its own label.

it lasted exactly one day and now it is gone. it didn't fall off, i stuck it on with tape. what do you think happened to it? your most fantastical and wrong answers only, please

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Portals to Hell by hrmphfft

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psychic *reads my mind*

Me;

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My recommendation is that you give your clown to someone who actually knows what they're doing. theater kid clown breeds are not beginner breeds, and are in fact very difficult to care for. The fact that you don't know whether you need to unwrap their candy or not proves that you haven't done any research into caring for any clowns, let alone such a difficult breed to care for. you're a terrible clown owner and you should report the breeder you got your theater kid from for negligence.

Do I need to unwrap taffy and candy or can clowns do this on their own? I don’t want to hurt my new theater kid friend.

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TCAF is over now, so here's my new comic I debuted there!

Enjoy!

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I'm bored as hell so im overhauling my blog(s)

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"damn I'm crying over an insect" "why am I having such strong feelings over how the sky looks" "it's weird how happy this small thing made me feel" THAT'S BECAUSE YOU LIVE HERE!!!! you live on this earth. everything all the time is an experience, no matter how common or mundane. this world is unique. so are its small moments. it is good to enjoy a tiny thing. you love the world even at its smallest scale.

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) <- super parenthesis. reblog to close all parentheticals you opened and forgot to close in your life and return to equilibrium

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Am I getting a good grade in tumblr mutual?

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WDYM WE GOT EVERY SNOWFLAKES DIFFERENT EXTENDED VERSION BEFORE MCR 5

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james: prepare for double [conspicuous, LOUD silence]

james: ... misty: where's the other one james: oh, ok. so that's how you remember her. well you know how when you defeat us, we go blasting off again? brock: yeah james: well when we landed this time she crashed through a window and got lovingly nursed back to health by a milf so now she's too busy being someone's dad now to be part of team rocket. meowth: its some real romance novel shit, meowth! wobbuffet: WOOOOOOOOBBUFFET james: so yeah. no more jessie. just james now. i'm definitely not jealous that my best friend is off hanging out with someone else now. i'm fine. i'm normal. also when i find the brat who she's giving fatherly advice to i'm going to kill him. im just going to kill him i think

ash ketchum: hey sorry i'm late you wouldn't believe how weird my home life just got. luckily someone just taught me how to ride a bike! and also how to steal bikes!

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It's easier to accept that you're aromantic once you understand that what you want isn't romance per se and it's really the companionship that appeals to you. I never actually liked the thought of being in a relationship but I liked the thought of being important to someone

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Edit because I think this is being misinterpreted: The aroace tag is not colored, it's a petition for Tumblr to color it (sorry for the confusion)

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LIKE TO CHARGE REBLOG TO CAST LET'S GET THIS FUCKER EXPLODEDED

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as an aroace, im particularly dangerous, because i wont fuck or marry. i only know how to kill.

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Here's a fun story of malicious compliance to brighten your day:

Until recently, a few people in my office had these desk shades to combat the obnoxious fluorescent lights, which is very helpful for people (like me) with migraines or other light-sensitivity issues.

A few days ago, everyone who has them was told to take them down. Different people were given different reasons - It violates fire code (it doesn't) / It blocks line of sight (sort of?). Since this goes against the existing status quo, the union reps (my beloved) jumped on it. Someone jokingly suggested using umbrella hats instead, since hats are allowed in the dress code. Today, the union reps are passing out these ridiculous things in protest:

If the rules are absurd, the resistance should match.