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Some time ago (I think in 2021) I had to go see a neurologist over really scary symptoms that resembled seizures. I was a nervous wreck about what I was feeling and had barely slept all week, which seemed to be apparent to the doc’s assistant when I sat down in the exam room for questioning or whatever. Dude was pretty young and soft spoken, around my age. He was laser focused doing something on one of those tablet-laptop Surface things as I spoke, presumably writing down my symptoms.

Midway through talking about my symptoms my voice audibly started shaking as I was describing them, clearly upset.

In the middle of my monologue he turns the tablet to face me, closes whatever program he has open and the wallpaper is this fucking collage of pictures of lord farquaad from shrek, lovingly decorated. Dude just sat there placidly smiling at me until I noticed and stopped dead in the middle of a sentence. We sat there in silence like this for like a solid minute before I started wheezing laughing. Before I could even say anything else or process it he picked up the tablet and wordlessly left the room, and I just sat there dumbfounded until the doctor showed up. 10/10 doctor experience tbh

I didn’t own a cell phone at the time to get a photo so this rendition from memory is all I can provide you

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the real danger of spending too much time with friends is you stumble out of ten days of happiness and good food like oh my god THAT was real life. my job means NOTHING

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the ghost of my dead brother: it would be my turn on computer... if I wasn't aborted... me: fuck off dude you died in a car crash everyone saw it

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pokemon firered and beef greek edition pretzel tribute

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the idea of a clutch purse is nightmarish to me. the whole point of bags was so we could escape the torment of holding things. and now u gotta hold a bag.

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i have no clue what is supposed to be happening here but i am a very big fan of this gif. where are they going……

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Beautiful older woman at the party asks me why such a cute kitten like myself wears a collar despite having no master and I, in turn, ask her if she knows what a Ronin is.

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two pieces of kind of obscure baltoy merch i own. the mega bloks baltoy and the mighty beanz baltoy. i call them bloktoy and beantoy

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What if you went grocery shopping and the produce section was just missing?

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US state borders but they are based off rivers and mountains

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let's be mama's stylish hat

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I love that I share my house with one of the most efficient apex predators millions of years of evolution could produce. I love that two of nature’s most prolific machines met and were like “hmmm. We should lay around and do nothing together”. Now we’re both fat and happy and full of meat. The hedonism of it all

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Me for the last 15 years: Starting a timer when you have to wait for something or stand in line can be helpful, because no matter how impatient you feel you can check the timer and remind yourself it has not been several eternities and has in fact only been five minutes.

Me setting a timer when I got to bag claim just now: I'm so clever! I will now be reminded that it's only been five minutes and bag claim usually takes about twenty!

Me looking at the timer thoughtfully: ...another Very Neurotypical Moment With Sam, it appears.

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This was great last year. At least a handful of people are trying to bring it back this year, and I'm sure gonna do my part.

My comic will be terrible and glorious as the dawn. Can't wait.