deathxwalkerxx

[deathxwalkerxx]

Is this going to be a happy ending or https://www.tumblr.com/deathxwalkerxx/713650571498897408/where-did-it-all-go-wrong

Hey Panda! I do my best to give all my stories a happy ending ( because I believe Natasha deserves happiness ) though the person who came to me with this story doesn't mind how the end goes.

It's more about the overcomings really, and closure. So we'll see how it ends up.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Where did it all go wrong?

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x F/Reader, side Maria Hill/Natasha Romanoff

Warnings: None for this chapter! Just trying to set the scene in this one.

Summary:  Poly isn’t for everyone.  When one is left out or excluded, it will never last…

A/N:  @whatshername86 ​  came up with this amazing story and had asked me to write it! So here is the first chapter of said story!! Also sorry it has taken me so long to update anything. But I’ve managed to handle things on this end so hopefully I can get back right into this. 

Chapter 1

You and Natasha started SHIELD around the same time. Both of you had something to prove. Both of you wanted to prove to the rest of these agents that you deserved to be here that you wanted to be here. Of course you didn’t know what Natasha had to prove and she didn’t know what you did either. You had come from HYDRA experiment, day in day out was just tests and being locked away unless they needed you. It was how you got your gifts in the first place. Of course you don’t consider them gifts, more like a curse considering who had given them to you. You had been going to therapy before you entered SHIELD and you remember your therapist telling you to write your emotions down in a letter. Of course you thought it was ridiculous, but when you had been doing it for a week you felt lighter and found yourself doing it more often. You didn’t show anyone these letters of course, they were for your eyes only. You mostly wrote about what you thought about yourself in the first letters, how you felt now that you were in SHIELD. 

A few weeks went by and you found your back against one of the mats, Natasha above you. Neither of you were holding back from your training. She was light on her feet, quick in her steps, and at times you just found yourself glued to the mat just trying to watch her movements to see a weakness in them. She was good at protecting herself, shielding herself, and you found it hard to get a hit in. Another thump echoed in the gym as your back once again landed on the mat, and you could feel yourself getting angry as you pushed yourself up on your feet, hands turning into fists as you began to swing, not widely, you were trying to hit her, to keep your anger in check.

Once again your back hits the mat, and you didn’t get up this time. “You’re trying too hard.” You hear Natasha say as she once again stands over you, her face coming into view instead of the ceiling that you were looking at. “You’re a lot harder to hit.” You say to her now, a smile gracing her features as she chuckles before helping you up. “I don’t think hand to hand combat is your strong suit.” She retorts to you, making you scoff at her words. “That wasn’t my training.” You say to her now before you were moving away from the mats, calling it a day. It was different for you now. Because you didn’t have a choice to call it a day in HYDRA yet here, you could do that. You couldn’t hear Natasha behind you, but you could feel her following you as you grabbed your water bottle and taking a few mouthfuls of water, before grabbing a towel to wipe at your face. 

“Can I ask what your training was?” Natasha asks you as she sits down on the bench staring up at you. For a moment you just stood there, staring at her. Wasn’t like anyone asked you that question before, no one here seemed to care where you came from, they just cared about getting past you and getting closer to their destination. You didn’t even know what you were working toward honestly. “You could, but I’d have to kill you.” You say in a deadpan tone that Natasha is unsure if you were joking or not. Instead she just watched you walk away from her, with the towel and your water bottle in hand. You trained with Natasha still, but you didn’t talk much. Instead three weeks after she asked you that question, you had written a letter. She watched as you came into the gym, noticed the piece of paper in your hand, and a small frown appeared on her face when you handed it to her. 

You stood tall as you gave it to her, no nervous ticks could be seen as you stood there. Natasha could only smile as she noticed her name on the piece of paper before opening it up to read it.

I was with HYDRA before being rescued and coming to SHIELD. I was mostly strapped to a table and experimented on. I took to the serum that they gave me which gave me control of the elements. I did some horrible things that I am not proud of and I’m trying to convince myself and others here that I want to be better that I can be better. 

Natasha pockets the letter with her emerald hue looking at your face. She wasn’t good at comforting, she wasn’t good at these emotional talks either. She didn’t know what to say but she nodded her head, letting you know that she understood what your letter was saying. Natasha wasn’t ready to disclose her own troubles, it wasn’t how she was trained. This wasn’t what she was trained for. You nodded back to her before you were heading out of the room. It felt awkward and you didn’t feel up to training with Natasha today. You didn’t know what to expect from her when you gave her that letter, but her staring at you definitely wasn’t something that you thought was going to happen. 

A year had gone by and you found yourself flat on your back once more, Natasha standing above you while Maria Hill was standing there watching you both. You knew that they were seeing who could progress and who couldn’t. With the help from Natasha you had become better at hand to hand combat. Natasha wasn’t able to always put you on your back, though you had yet to put her on hers. You could see the smirk upon her face and you were using your leg to sweep hers off the mat. You took her by surprise because you usually tended to just lay there on the mat, not even bothering trying with getting her down. You were quick to crawl on top of her, pinning her down your eyes daring her to try and get out of it. 

“That’ll be all for today.” You hear Maria say and you lift yourself off Natasha, offering her a hand up that she happily took before you both turned to Maria. “Good work the both of you. You’ve definitely been approving since being here.” Maria says and you watch her offering Natasha a smile, and you walk off the mats to take a seat on the bench where your water bottle is and your towel. You watch as Maria and Natasha talk for a bit, before Maria leaves and Natasha wanders over to you now. “Do you have plans?” She asks you, making you shake your head before you were wiping at your face with the towel that was resting beside you. “Do you?” You ask, watching her shaking her head which just has you frowning at her. “Maybe we could watch a movie? I feel like watching a movie.” She says to you which makes you smile and nod your head. “Sure, let's go watch a movie.” So that was how this night went. The both of you are sitting in the small space watching a movie on the small screen. It wasn’t uncommon for those here in SHIELD to have something to wind down with. Wasn’t like movies weren’t allowed or anything.

Though you and Natasha both weren’t accustomed to watching movies, and neither of you could tell each other what your favorite movie was. Because neither of you had a favorite movie. With your backgrounds neither of you had time to go to the movies. Neither of you had gotten a chance to sit down and learn about movies. The two of you had found yourselves like this most nights, some nights Natasha would be called away by Maria, and that would end the movie night. You didn’t want to continue watching the movie without her, and Natasha never returned so you stopped waiting for her. You were fine not being in Maria’s radar, being the experiment of HYDRA and always being the center of their attention it was nice to not be the center of someone else’s. So you enjoyed the quietness that the nights brought you, despite the nightmares that sleep would give you. 

Training was easy, you gotta show them what you were capable of, and be able to use that time to get rid of the pent up tension in your bones. Natasha was the first to notice of course, but you weren’t exactly open to talking about it. When she had asked you that night on one of your many movie nights, you told her you were fine, even offered up a smile though it didn’t reach your eyes. Though when Natasha was getting ready for sleep, she had found a letter on her pillow, her name scribbled in your hand writing. You told her about the nightmares that plagued your mind, though you also had told her that you found peace in the nights you got to watch movies with her, got to listen to her talking about anything and nothing. It had her smiling as she tucked the letter underneath her pillow with the other one. 

Natasha wasn’t very good at communicating herself. She had trouble opening herself up to not just you but others around her. She wasn’t very good at letting you know that she appreciated you, and the company that you brought. Her favorite moments were when the both of you got to sit down and enjoy a movie together, it was something that she always would look forward to. But how was she to tell you that? She didn’t want to come off as vulnerable or weak, so she didn’t say anything, she just let things play out how they always played out, why ruin that with speaking?

[deathxwalkerxx]

I am so sorry I haven't been updating or been around.

Things have just been hectic over here and I'm just feeling a little run down and not doing so good.

I will get to things when I can. I promise you all that. I just need to figure stuff out. Again I'm sorry pandas.

[deathxwalkerxx]

We Are Equals.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x F/Reader

Warnings: Ah I think none? Maybe a little self eestem issues? Idk if that’s it. 

Anonymous asked:

I have a request if you're taking them, I may also request this to a few other blogs, so don't mind that, I absolutely love your work btw!!

I was hoping for Wanda and reader

wanda recently invited her gf R to live with her, but R has a habit she doesn't know about. The previous person R lived with always made R do the laundry, make all the food, do all the cleaning, and do everything, and R doesn't realize how messed up that is, R thinks their ''lower'' than whoever they live with, therefore they should do everything.

wanda is heartbroken to see R waiting on her like that, making her meals and cleaning up after her, and doing it happily too, and is upset that her love thinks so low of themselves.

que Wanda reassuring R they will split the work evenly, and R doesn't need to do everything

thank u in advance!

A/N: thank you so much for sending this in Panda!! I hope I’ve done this justice for you and it’s what you’ve envisioned the fic to be!! It’s my first time writing Wanda solo, so I hope again I’ve written this right!! Is it hot in here?? Cause I’m nervous lol.

They say you know what love is, the moment that you see the person you’re supposed to be with. Your heart would start thumping hard in your chest, your palms would become sweaty. All you could think about was when you’d see the person again, needing to see them again. Your routine would change just so you could fit them into your life. Your life wouldn’t no longer revolve around you, but your mind would revolve around your partner. That you would do anything to make them happy, and they would do the same for you. You’d never be able to look at life the same, and you’d feel like you finally woke up when you have met this person. 

Of course that wasn’t for you. Your first real relationship wasn’t like what they talked about. Of course for you, she was your everything and you’d do anything to make her happy. You didn’t think you deserved her, you found yourself thinking that you were beneath her, and that at any moment she would be whisked away by someone better, someone worth more than what you were. Of course that was a long time ago. You were now dating Wanda Maximoff, and she was everything that you thought no one should touch. Perhaps you put your partners on a high pedestal and never allowed yourself to be up there with them.

Wanda and yourself had been dating for a few months now, and everything was going swimmingly. Both of you learning about each other, and unable to stop touching each other. She knew just how to love you, and soon you were enthralled by her, needing her just as much as she needed you. One day out of the blue while the both of you were lounging around, watching a sitcom that Wanda loved she had asked you to move in with her. Granted it already felt like you both had been living together. At your place Wanda had a few of her things there and the same with you at hers. You liked Wanda’s place, it was more open than yours. The bedroom was a lot bigger and the bed was much more comfier also. 

Wanda didn’t mind which place you both picked to live in, though it warmed her heart that you picked hers, that you felt at home at her place. You found out that Wanda loved cooking, but while you were now living together you were doing the cooking. Wanda had to leave for work, and you began to clean up the place. It was clean, but you began to dust the place, and do the laundry. It was only the first week of living together so Wanda didn’t think anything of it. She was astonished when she came home and everything was sparkling, even the window sills were. She came home to a lovely cooked meal, and she wanted to savor it. She thanked you profusely, and even showed you that night how thankful she really was. 

Weeks went by and then months and it began to dawn on Wanda. She started to realize that something was wrong with this picture and she couldn’t believe that she let this go on for so long. You were doing the laundry every night, cooking, doing the dishes, making the bed, vacuuming, cleaning anything in this house. Wanda realized that she hadn’t once lifted a finger. You even made breakfast and then cleaned up while she was in the shower. You even cleaned the toilet. Wanda was mad at herself for allowing this to go on for as long as it had.

You were always like this? Thinking so little of yourself that you think you were some kind of servant to her? That you didn’t feel like you were an equal in this relationship at all? She couldn’t fathom how you would come to be this way, who made you like this? Why didn’t anyone stop you from being this way? It made her mad, that one day she knocked Natasha on her ass, before storming out of the training room. To say the assassin was surprised was an understatement. But Wanda didn’t have time to deal with that, she had something else on her mind. She had texted you that day, telling you not to cook, that she was picking up dinner on the way back. She needed to sit down with you and talk to you about this, she needed to set this right. 

She couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who thought they were beneath her, she couldn’t let you live like that, she couldn’t live like this. To Wanda you both were equal partners. You were not her maid, she was not royalty. No one deserved to be waited on hand and foot by someone that should be standing by their side. She never thought of you as below her, and she never would. It was driving her mad with how much this hurt her. Guilt was eating at her as she drove back to your home now, knowing that you’d be cleaning. She hated walking into this home and seeing how it was sparkling. She hated to see the look on your face like you’re proud of yourself for what you’ve accomplished. It just made her angry that you expect this to be a good thing. How could you not see how wrong this was? It made her feel dirty, though she wasn’t mad at you, she could never be mad at you for the way you had conditioned yourself to believe that this was what a relationship was supposed to be like.

Her eyes were burning with unshed tears as she brought the food into the kitchen, you leaning against the counter top with a mug between your hands as you peered into one of the bags. “Chinese for dinner?” You asked her a soft smile gracing your features as you hummed in approval before moving to grab some plates out of the cupboards. “Stop.” Wanda says, and you freeze at the tone she used. As you looked closer at her you could see the tension in her muscles and you swore that she was visibly shaking. You tried to rack your mind to find what made her this way. Had you folded the clothing wrong? Did you use the wrong washing powder? Did it make her itchy?

“I’m sorry. For whatever I have done.” You breathe out to Wanda now, and you could see her jaw clenching while looking at you, her eyes had tears in them and it had you canting your head, trying to figure her out. You had never seen her like this, you never wanted to see her like this. You wanted her happy, you wanted to do everything in your power to make her smile. “I’m not mad at you.” Wanda assures you, though it does nothing to make you relax. Something had her unhappy, and you were still trying to find out what exactly had made her this way. “Okay.” You say the word slowly, letting her know that you don’t trust her words. Palms began to sweat, but not in the way people told you about.

“I’m mad at myself.” She says now, her eyes glancing down at the kitchen counter that she was still standing beside, and your eyes stay glued on her, while you were standing in the middle of the kitchen, the counter keeping you both separated. “Why?” You had to ask, because you weren’t sure what was going on, and you wanted so badly to understand where Wanda was coming from, you wanted to be able to comfort her. “You don’t even see it.” Wanda says her voice cracking as she lowered herself into one of the stools, her legs feeling wobbly from the realization that you just didn’t get it. That you didn’t see how bad this was, how wrong it was.

“See what?” You ask softly, your own voice cracking as you made your way over to where Wanda was sitting, and you sat down next to her taking a hand in your own, your thumb brushing over her knuckles, trying your best to help soothe her, to be there for her. “How wrong this is, sweetie. You do all the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning. You’re not my servant. A relationship should be equal.” She says to you now, and you were frowning while looking at her, before pressing a kiss to her hair. “You do so much already, Wands. I just.. I wanted you to come home and just be able to put your feet up.” You whisper to her now, watching as she was shaking her head, her hand squeezing yours a little tightly though you don’t say anything about that.

“No. You do just as much as I do, Y/N. You work just as much as I do. A relationship should be equal, we should be splitting up the chores, not one of us doing them all. You’re not beneath me, baby. You should be beside me.” She says to you now. Your heart was breaking listening to her. All the things you were doing, you thought were the right thing. It wasn’t like you felt like you were her servant, you enjoyed cleaning up the place knowing that Wanda would just be able to come home and put something on tv to watch while you both enjoyed dinner. You opened your mouth to say something but nothing came out. Instead you silently move away from her, deciding for the time being to place the food on some plates. You could feel Wanda’s eyes on you, but you were focused on getting the food on the plates.

Once again you tried to open your mouth to say something to her, but nothing came out. You shake your own head while shaky hands place the food on the plates. “Detka?” You hear softly from Wanda now, and you shake your head a little harder now, your eyes not looking toward her. It broke Wanda, and she moved to wrap you in a hug, where you bury your face into her neck. “I didn’t want to lose you.” You finally say after some time, just breathing her in and letting her warmth calm your nerves. “I didn’t know that what I was doing was upsetting you, and that’s the last thing that I wanted to do. I love you, and I just. You’re very special to me, and deserve everything that I can offer you.” You say to her while Wanda was shaking her head. “Not like this, sweetie. This isn’t how a relationship works. We’re going to split the chores equally, okay? Because that’s what a relationship should be like. You’re my equal, you should always be equal in a relationship, not anything underneath.” She whispers before pulling back to place a soft kiss to your lips.

“We can start that while over dinner. Maybe we can also have every Friday be a takeout day.” She suggests, knowing that neither of you have to cook every night. And Friday seemed like a good night to have takeout. “I’d like that.” You whisper to her now, before pressing a kiss to her lips, and then to her forehead, lingering there before you were grabbing the plates only for Wanda to slap one of your hands, making you yelp and look at her in shock. “I can carry my own plate, detka.” She tells you now, though her words weren’t harsh, and you both move into the living room, sitting on the couch you wrap you both up in a blanket, legs curling underneath you as you grab your plate and turn the tv on. 

Wanda wanted you to pick something to watch, something that wasn’t what she wanted to watch, so you picked a comedy to watch while you both enjoyed the food. You got better over the coming weeks by sharing the chores, and you found yourself a little more relaxed around Wanda doing this. You came to realize that there was nothing wrong with being equal in a relationship, in fact. It just felt a lot better. You both took turns with cooking, one of you would do the breakfast, both of you would do lunch, and then one of you would do dinner. It always changed, neither one of you was just doing the dinner. Friday takeout became a thing, dishes were left until the morning. 

Both of you grew closer after doing this, the house felt more like a home, the relationship was stronger, and you showed how much you loved Wanda in other ways. When Wanda told you that she had knocked Natasha on her ass, you tried making her feel how she did feel on that day, just so you could see it again. But you haven’t succeeded as of yet. Maybe one day.

[deathxwalkerxx]

I loved your latest fic!!

I am so happy you loved it panda!!!

Honestly I wanted to rewrite it the moment I posted it, lol. Just doesn't feel like my best work.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Ray Of Sunshine. Literally.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x F/Reader

Warnings: Sickness, possibly it?

Anonymous asked:

Hey! So here's my fic request

Reader is a happy person, even when overworked. Lately reader has been overworking themselves with schoolwork or something, which makes nat worried, but reader happily assures nat to "stop worrying your pretty head, I'm fine! " or something like that. Eventually reader workes themselves into a cold or the flu, and even thought they feel miserable (which Nat knows) they still have kind words for nat. Nat wonders how their able to be so happy while sick, and eventually is able to pull Reader away from their desk and care for them :)

Thanks darling!

A/N: I am so sorry that it took me so long to get to this!! Life has been hectic but trying to get back into writing! Hope you’re still around, and you enjoy this!!! Thank you so much for sending it in!!

You’ve been dating Natasha for a couple of years now, both of you meeting in a cafe where you had been studying for one of your many classes. You both hit it off right away, and before you both knew it, you were in a serious relationship. You both were always there for each other, and sure at times you’d argue but you’d make sure you made up and it never got out of hand. Each of you were able to see where the other was coming from and soon enough the fight would be over, and you two would be curled up next to one another once more. Lately though you hadn’t had much time for anything. With so many classes that you insisted you needed, you had been working your ass off to get all your assignments done. It wasn’t much of a surprise that you’d be sitting at your desk working your ass off to get these things done. Of course you never once ignored Natasha, when she was home you made sure that you gave her your attention. At times though she would be sitting there reading a book and you’d be working on the assignments that you wanted to get done. You figured the sooner you could get it done, the sooner you could really give her all the attention that she needed.

Though it was clear that it was taking it’s toll on you. Natasha could see the bags under your eyes, the frustration that was beginning to surface in your eyes and your face. Lately you would talk to her for a couple of minutes before asking her if it was alright if you get back to work. Of course the ex assassin would never stop you from working, would never keep you from it. She knew how much you wanted to get this done, and knew that it was important to you. But lately you only napped for a couple of minutes before you were right back to working. She felt like the only times that she saw you was sitting in your seat at your desk in the bedroom. “I’m worried about you, detka.” Natasha says to you now, which has you turning in your seat a smile plastered on your face before you were pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Stop worrying, your pretty little head, I’m fine.” You reassure her, and Natasha believed you.

How could she not? You were smiling and still your bubbly self. She figured if you really were working too much you’d be moody and snappy. As days went on though, she started to notice the way you were rubbing at your eyes, the way your nose began to become red. You were coughing up a lung the night that she came in with groceries, your body slumped in your seat, your head resting on the keyboard of your laptop. She was quick to run over to you, kneeling down beside you now as fingers were running through your hair. “What happened, baby?” She asks you, watching the way you were pouting at her as you sniffled softly. “I was cutting up onions.” You tell her before you were sitting up straighter in your seat a smile upon your face before you were coughing a little once more.

“I guess, I was just thinking of you, and how excited I was about making you dinner, that I began to cry over the onions while telling them how much I wanted this dinner to be amazing.” You say with a giggle which had Natasha rolling her eyes as she lifts you up with ease and places you down on top of the bed. “How are you this happy despite being sick?” She asks, the confusion evident in her voice and in her eyes as she sat down beside you, grabbing a few tissues from the tissue box that was in the drawer beside your bed. She always had medicine in hand for the days that you got sick, though that wasn’t often. You took care of yourself, always getting the flu shot when you could. 

She actually couldn’t think of the last time that you were sick. “I’m sick but not dying, Tasha. Even then though. I think I’d still be happy. Because any moment that I get to spend with you, is my happiest moments.” You say to her now, watching as Natasha was pouring water into a cup and offering you some pills to take. Though you could see her eyes shimmering with tears and it had you smiling softly at her now, before sitting up and cupping her cheeks. You knew this wasn’t an actual flu, it was more of a stress cold that you gave yourself from overworking yourself and not looking after the body that you were given. You barely got to see the ex assassin be vulnerable like this. Always hiding her emotions because she was still learning that it wasn’t a weakness, being able to feel like a human.

“Life shouldn’t drag you down. There is always something beautiful to find in life. And. There are people out there that have it worse off. You had it worse off than I did. There is nothing in my life that I should be upset about. Even being sick right now, I’m here getting pampered by you.” You say to her now, before you were taking the pills that were still being held in Natasha’s hand and taking them with a mouthful of water. Natasha could only sit there and stare at you. Looking intensely at you. She could see happiness swimming in tired eyes, could see the smile that was still upon your face. She could see you were tired though, you were miserable, and yet still. Here you were, smiling at her, offering her words of comfort. You pulled at her heart like a puppet, but you didn’t play with it, you secured it in a cage.

“Do you want me to finish dinner off?” She asks, knowing right now that you were in no state to cook. Though she watches as you shake your head, a chuckle leaving your lips which causes you to go into a coughing fit. “No.” You rasp out to her now after the coughing fit subsides. “I fucked that up, pizza should be delivered though.” You tell her, making Natasha laugh as she checks the time, and then looks back at you once more. “Then I’ll run you a bath while we wait for the pizza.” She says to you. You watch as she does this, before you were quietly getting out of bed to go back to your work. Maybe you could get a bit more done before Natasha comes out to get you and puts you in said bath.

You were blocked up and your hearing was a little duller due to the head cold that you had so you didn’t hear Natasha enter the room. Let’s be real though, you never heard her enter the room unless she wanted you to. You squeal when she comes to stand in front of you picking you up once more and walks you into the bathroom. “Enough, baby girl. You have time to finish your work, and you don’t need to finish it right now.” She murmurs into your hair before sitting you down on the toilet. “Come on, Tasha. I swear I’m almost done.” You whine. It had Natasha shaking her head as you began to strip, knowing fair well that you were going in that bathtub. 

“Good. You can finish it when you’re feeling a little better.” She says as you were hopping into the tub a soft groan leaving your lips as the hot water hit your skin. “I think I can handle that actually. I do miss curling up with you.” You say to her as your head rolls to the side so you can see Natasha, watching as she was smiling at her. “You know you can always join me, Natty.” You say to her, watching as she shook her head before she was leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. “One of us has to be dressed to grab the pizza, my love.” She says to you which has a devilish smirk appearing on your face. Well it would have looked like that, if your eyes weren’t half closed and your nose wasn’t red. “Could always give the person a good look.” You say wiggling your eyebrows as Natasha was laughing, that raspy laugh that always did things to you when you heard it. “I think you might give them a heart attack.” She tells you, making you gasp up at her.

“I would never. Besides, I don’t know how to do that.” You point out to her as there was a knock at the door. You watch her leave and then decide to clean yourself up before getting out. As the door closed you wrapped yourself up in a towel and sauntered your way into the kitchen watching as Natasha was dishing out the pizza and the sides that you had ordered. “Were you planning on leftovers?” Natasha asks, noting all the food that you ordered. “Of course. I’m sick, I’m not cooking for the rest of the week. Now, come. I want food and Natasha cuddles. Ooo we can watch that new show we had bookmarked!” You say excitedly, dropping the towel where you stood as you ran into the bedroom calling out to Natasha who was shaking her head and chuckling to herself.

You were a ray of sunshine in her dark corner of the world, and she wouldn’t change you for anything. She took care of you while you were sick and when you got better, she made sure that you took long breaks from your assignments, even made sure that you would go outside and enjoy some fresh air. You never got sick from overworking yourself after this one time. Natasha was always pulling you away and you never fought her, because she gave the best cuddles. She was still amazed even now with how happy you still were while you were sick, that it made her realize. She would never know when you’re sick, unless you showed symptoms. You were always optimistic no matter what you were feeling. It made her love you so much. And you helped her love herself a little more each day also.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Finding Home

Pairing: WandaNat x F!Reader

Warnings: Mental Abuse, Physical Abuse, Anxiety.

Summary: You’ve been abused for most of your life, by the person you trusted the most in this world. Until two women come and take you from there.

A/N: Still no WandaNat gifs I’m sorry panda’s. Also I’m sorry that you had to wait so long for this chapter. Promise I won’t leave that long again, things just got so hectic over here, had to take a step back.

part 1

Chapter 2

When Wanda came back into the room the young girl was still passed out. Natasha was checking over her wounds and she could see that her wife was seeing which ways she would need to break her bones in order to fix them back up. “I got some morphine.” Wanda says, knowing that might help the young woman make sure that she didn’t feel what her wife was about to do to her. The last thing either of them wanted was for you to go through more pain. Wanda isn’t sure who had done this to you, but she knew that she wouldn’t stop looking for them. You weren’t the first person that Wanda had helped out of these situations, but you were the first that had the most injuries. How anyone could treat someone like this, didn’t sit well with Wanda. She couldn’t even try to think about her harming Natasha in this way, or Natasha harming her in this way. 

Their lives weren’t exactly the greatest but they didn’t make their trauma and their pasts turn them into something ugly. They turned into very caring and beautiful people, and whoever hurt you, was ugly in every way. She moved to rest on the bed by your head, using her magic to hold you down while she was watching as Natasha began to strip you of your clothes, and checking over the wounds that were just covering your body.  It disgusted Natasha with what she was seeing over your body. Not to mention how thin you were also. Did no one care about you? And why didn’t they care about you? Emerald hue looks at Wanda’s now, seeing that her wife had you secure and Natasha moved down to your leg, running her fingers over it, feeling where it was broken, then she was bracing her hands tightly around your leg, before she was snapping it back into place.

You let out a howl from the pain that was now coursing through your leg, it was throbbing, but you were still out of it from the injuries that you had endured. “Shit, I forgot to give her the morphine.” Wanda says now, but Natasha was shaking her head, her hue snapping to Wanda’s. “We’ll give it to her after. I have to set a few more bones, and then we can maybe call Bruce in to put her leg in a cast and her arm.” Natasha says to Wanda who was still holding you down, as Natasha then set your arm back into place. They clean you up before taking you to the med bay where Bruce and Cho were fixing you up a bit better. They set you up with an IV that was giving you some morphine and the other that was giving you some nutrients that you were clearly lacking. 

Wanda and Natasha didn’t leave your side of course. Considering you were just a civilian and you weren’t meant to be in the tower. They also didn’t want you waking up alone. Or waking up with Steve in the room asking you questions that you might not want to answer and wouldn’t have the answers to. You mumbled in your sleep and Natasha and Wanda came to realize that you had nightmares a lot. It was understandable considering all that you had gone through, it was no wonder that you were having nightmares. Both women were there to soothe you back to sleep, hoping that you could find at least something peaceful to dream about. It was about just after midnight that you woke up with a gasp. 

The room was dim, and you could make out the sound of beeping that came from your left side. You felt a bit out of it, and you realized you couldn’t feel the pain that would have been coursing through your body. You also realized that this was not your place. The monitor started to beep a little faster as you became terrified. If you weren’t home, your girlfriend was going to be mad. You weren’t supposed to leave the house, you were told to stay there and keep it clean. What was she going to do to you if she found out that you weren’t there? You tried to move, but your body was heavy and you were whimpering as you tried to get your legs to move, it was then that you found that your leg was in a cast. So was your arm. Your girlfriend wouldn’t have patched you up, you knew this. Your head was foggy so you couldn’t recall how you even ended up here.

As you scanned the room you realized there were two figures sleeping on either side of you, their heads resting on the side of the bed. You were sure they were going to have sore backs when they woke up. But why were you here? Why would they bring you here? What did you do? And how were you going to get out of this? The beeping was still going fast and it was Natasha who woke when she heard it. Her eyes immediately went to you and she nudged Wanda awake seeing that you were awake now. She could read the fear in your eyes and it was all over your face as you were trembling under the blankets that they had covered you in. “We’re not going to hurt you, sweetie.” Wanda says to you now, watching the way you flinched when she rested a hand on your good arm. 

“Where am I?” You ask them both now, your eyes darting between the both of them, trying to read their faces but you weren’t good with reading people, you never had been. You knew you had to get back home, god knows what was going to happen if your girlfriend found out that you weren’t at home, it would probably be a lot worse than what you received the other night. “You’re safe.” Wanda decides to go with. She wasn’t sure what you’d think about them breaking into your place and bringing you back to the compound. She wanted to let you know that you were safe first, so you wouldn't have to panic about them hurting you. Wanda could see how you were curling up on yourself, and she didn’t want you to move, she wanted you to be able to relax. 

“You’re in the med bay of our compound.” Natasha tells you as she moves to grab you some water. She figured you’d want to go back to your house, it was a natural instinct. Someone who had been hurting you for no one knows how long, your natural instinct is to go back there, to avoid it. She knew that Wanda wouldn’t want you to go back and neither did Natasha, but she also knew it wasn’t up to them to decide this for you. If you wanted to go back, they’d have to accept that and let you go back. “When can I go home?” Natasha was expecting this question and seeing the way her wife’s shoulders dropped she could see that Wanda wasn’t. She passes you the water before sitting down on the bed. “Whenever you’re healed. Unfortunately you’ve been lacking food. Not to mention your arm and leg had been broken. If we send you back home now, chances are you won’t survive through the day.” She wasn’t exaggerating this. You were weak, and if whoever was hurting you decided to really go for it? You really wouldn’t survive. 

You on the other hand had a choice to make. You weren’t suicidal, and honestly, did you really want to go back? Maybe you could stay here and heal and then disappear. Of course you had no money to your name so you couldn’t go anywhere. You laid back down in your bed, the water just being held in your hand as you stared up at the ceiling. The way you thought about your life going, this wasn’t it. “I supposed, just until I get better.” You mumble out, fear still radiating through you though, because if she did find you here, you were sure you wouldn’t be staying here for very long. You could hear a sound that you deciphered as a squeal but you didn’t look to see where the noise came from. To be honest with each sound that was happening had you flinching, your eyes closing tightly like you were expecting something awful to happen.

“You are safe here.” Wanda says again as she stands beside Natasha, a hand running through her short curls while the both of them were staring at you now. “Yeah. I’ve heard that before.” You mutter under your breath, before you were placing the water back on the table not feeling like a drink right now, you actually felt pretty tired and soon enough you found yourself falling asleep once more, while Natasha and Wanda make plans on where you’d be staying while you were healing. It was better to have you close to them, so as you slept they began to organize a room across from theirs, making the bed, making sure the tv was working, and the room looked inviting for when you were able to come and stay here.

[deathxwalkerxx]

hi are you still updating finding home ?

Yes I am!! Sorry I haven't been on to update! Things are kind of hectic here lately. A lot has happened so just trying to adjust to it while also now with Christmas here and all.

I will do my best to get to the next chapter though!! I haven't given up on my stories!!

[deathxwalkerxx]

Heyyy is it cool if I give you a fic idea to write? :D

Absolutely panda!!!! I'd love to write your fic idea!!!

[deathxwalkerxx]

Finding Home

Pairing: WandaNat x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mental Abuse, Physical Abuse, Anxiety.

Summary: You’ve been abused for most of your life, by the person you trusted the most in this world. Until two women come and take you from there.

A/N: Do I still not have WandaNat gifs? I do not. I know, panda’s, I know. I am terrible at this. Also am terrible at Summary’s all of a sudden. Boo me. 

Chapter 1

Throughout your life you always had been told that you were nothing. Even your family made you feel that way. You worked hard in school because you wanted to get out of the place that you were in. Even managed to change your name. Life was going good for you. You wanted a better life than what you had been offered, wanted to even get yourself some friends that wouldn’t drag you through the mud like your family had done. You met your girlfriend while you were both in college. Everything was going amazingly. She was really sweet to you, even shouted you out for dinner, and helped you when you needed to study. She helped you change your major because she thought you could do something less stressful, and more relaxing. Of course you wanted to follow your dreams, but she made some good points. Plus she was the only one that truly cared for you so why wouldn’t you take her advice? You always wondered what she saw in you.  Wasn’t like you had many people lining up to get to know you and spend time with you, and asking you out. Not to mention everyone that you knew just didn’t think of you at all. 

You could stand in a crowded room and no one would notice that you were there. Sometimes you’d even think your special power was that you could make anyone around you believe that you weren’t there, like being invisible, but no one would be able to bump into you and find out that you were still there. Of course you weren’t cool like superheroes, you didn’t get a superhero ability. You were just some loser that people didn’t care about, that people didn’t want to know. So what made her want to know you? You weren’t sure. But she invited you out to the parties that she was invited to. Now you didn’t like parties, you didn’t see the point in getting drunk that you were regretting it tomorrow. Or making a complete fool of yourself. Perhaps this was why people didn’t like you. You were too closed off, too in control of yourself that people thought you didn’t know how to have fun. You made jokes though, and you were comfortable with just making a fool of yourself for her. Until she told you enough, and then you stopped making jokes around her. You stopped doing a lot of things due to upsetting her. You didn’t know when she became so violent, or even angry but you figured it was you.

You were what upset her, you could tell by the way she just looked at you from across the room and you could see the anger in her face. Yet there were days where she absolutely loved you, where your relationship just felt normal like the good ole days where you both laid on the couch laughing with each other and sharing stories. The rooms were brighter back then, full of light, and warmth. That all changed though, and you can’t pinpoint the moment that it all changed, you can’t pinpoint when she had changed, you just know things were getting rather cold and dark. She’d come home, with alcohol in her system though she wasn’t drunk. She didn’t want you to use that against her. Not that you’d use anything against her. She was the only person that truly loved you, who truly saw you for who you were, and you didn’t want to push her away, you didn’t want her to leave you. 

So you did everything that you could to make her happy. You made sure that the food was prepared for when she got home, and if she got home late, you’d be there to warm it up for her, while also making sure she had a fresh pot of coffee, or a beer depending on what she wanted. You were afraid to speak to her, so you waited to see if she’d start a conversation, but that just ended up with her arguing with you of course. You apologized to her profusely, letting her know that you’d never do it again, you promised that you’d make sure to do better, and you did. You didn’t watch any shows that you wanted to watch. She ruled the place and you allowed it to happen. Hey, it was better than getting a fist to the ribs, that was for sure. Sad thing was, you didn’t even know about the mental abuse she was putting you through. All you could think about was the physical. One day she came home and told you that you should stop working, because she wanted this place to be looked after. It was her place after all, despite the fact all your money went into it. You now had no money to your name, nothing. Everything that you had paid for went into her name. 

It was better that way she told you. Since you were no longer working, if things went south you would lose everything. It was better in her name and you couldn’t find it in you to argue with her. You were getting tired, exhausted. You barely slept, because you were worried that the house wasn’t cleaned enough, so you spent a lot of your time making sure it was so spotless that there wasn’t even a single spec of dust on anything. You couldn’t even count how many times you cooked her food until you were sure that you’d made it to perfection. Of course she did all the shopping, so it was always her favorite food that she brought, it was her favorite dishes that you made. She went out, and you stayed in. Your friends stopped messaging once you stopped answering. You were tired of always shutting them down, telling them you can’t go out, making up some excuse. It made her mad when you’d go out with your friends.

Though it was her decision, she’d tell you to go hang out with them and you’d go, but when you came home she would get pissed. It was like a game, and you failed every time she played it. If you told her you were fine staying home with her, she’d give you the cold shoulder, and you couldn’t fathom what you’d done. Considering you had done as she asked, you went out and enjoyed yourself like she had asked, but she wasn’t happy about it. You didn’t understand, and you were afraid to ask her what was wrong. So you stopped. You stayed at home, cooked her a meal, sometimes she wasn’t home to eat it, sometimes she would be. Then the dinners weren’t good enough for her, her beer wasn’t cold enough, her coffee wasn’t hot enough, you hogged the covers so much that she moved you to the spareroom. You weren’t to come out until she had gone, and you were to be back in that room before she got back.

The hitting got worse, she no longer cared about where she hit you, because you were never going out, you were never leaving this damn place. You were trapped here, unable to leave. It made you wonder if you should just finish yourself off for her, if that would make her happy. Not that it would matter, because you wouldn’t be here. You were only still a young woman while you were going through this, and you had no one else. You thought she cared for you, thought she loved you, but that was a lie. All of this was a lie. Every night when you laid in bed, you screamed inside of your head, begging someone to come save you. Little did you know, one night someone heard you.

Wanda never took this route back to her place. But lately every night when she was trying to drift off to sleep she just got a nagging feeling and every night she would wander out trying to find what was nagging at her, but coming up empty. She would always take a different route hoping that somehow she would find that nagging feeling that kept her up at night. Every time that Wanda thought she was getting close, those thoughts would vanish and she was left standing in the street hoping that she could hear them.  But she couldn’t. So she would go back home, explain to Natasha where she’d been, though the redhead knew where Wanda was, because it was the same night every night, and Natasha wished that she could help her, but she couldn’t read minds. 

Then one night Wanda woke in a panic, screaming that she had woken up Natasha while the ex assassin was asleep. She cradled Wanda pressing a kiss to her head doing her best to calm the witch down. Wanda was quick to get herself dressed, pulling herself out of bed, with Natasha in tow. The ex assassin wasn’t going to leave Wanda to do this by herself. The both of them make their way back to the same spot Wanda had found herself standing in front of. Though now the thoughts were rather loud, and Wanda knew where they were coming from. Her eyes looked to Natasha now, her hand tightening in her wife’s hand. “Nat.” Her voice was quivering as she continued to listen in on these thoughts. “Let’s go.” Natasha says to her now, not even questioning Wanda.

Something had shaken her wife, and Natasha would do anything to make sure that she was feeling better, that whatever was keeping her up at night, would be here for them to solve it. Wanda took to the skies with her wife’s hand in her own, landing on one of the balconies, and as she got there, she was shivering like she was cold, that had Natasha making quick work on pick locking the sliding door open. It was dark when they got into the place, and if Natasha had to admit it a little creepy. It was too quiet, there were no sounds going on around them, the place almost looked like no one lived in it. It was spotless, no dishes in the sink, even the tv had no spots on it. Again it was a little creepy. Though she kept close to Wanda who was wandering down the hall to the furthest room in the place. Natasha paused her steps to look into the room that they had passed, and she could see that someone had been living it in.

It was a mess, a lot more messier than the rooms they had stepped into beforehand. Natasha didn’t think the person that was occupying this room was the one that had been cleaning up the place. You couldn’t see the floor of the room, it was that messy. It had Natasha scrunching up her nose at the sight of it, not understanding how anyone could have a room like this. She was pulled out of her thoughts when She heard Wanda gasping and she made her way toward her. She could see that Wanda had the door cracked open slightly and was peering into the room.

What Wanda could see was you laying in your bed unmoving. Granted you were breathing, and she could hear your thoughts which let her know you were still alive. They quietly wandered into the room, and Wanda could see the casts that were on your arm and leg, she could feel how pain you were in. Natasha could see it by the grimace that was on your face. Wanda was kneeling down in front of you now, fingers brushing damp curls out of your face, and her heart broke when you were whimpering out a soft ‘no’, which had her backing up a little. “We need to get her out of here.” Natasha now says before she was bending down to pick you up and cradle you in her arms. 

Wanda adored Natasha so much that she wasn’t questioning her wife as they moved toward the balcony once more, and took to the night sky. Wanda’s magic kept Natasha close to her as they flew back to the compound, a place that they both had come to love and couldn’t see themselves leaving any time soon. Natasha took you to their room and placed you down on the bed softly, keeping you above the covers of course, so they could examine your wounds. “Who the hell did this?” Natasha questions while Wanda was shaking her head, checking your own for the moment, seeing the purple blush that was appearing on your skin, an indication that you had been hit previously. “She’s going to need some antibiotics, and better casts than this. I think they’re handmade.” Wanda says as she was studying the rags over your arm and leg. 

She knew that these needed to go, and so she was unwrapping them, seeing the bruises under your skin on your arm, seeing the way it was bent the wrong way. “We’re going to have to reset these.” Natasha says as she examines them. “Is that going to hurt her?” Wanda asks, her head turning to look at her wife who was nodding her head, though Wanda could see that she didn’t want to do that. “We might need to get painkillers for her then, to help knock her out.” Wanda says as she gets up to move out of the room and down to the medical bay so she could find the medicine that she would need to give you, before making her way back to her quarters that she shared with her wife. Things were about to get a lot more complicated.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Sorry I haven't been writing much!

I've got so many ideas swimming in my head that, it's hard atm to write everything.

So imma just start throwing shit out there and hopefully be able to continue old stuff.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Are ur anons called panda? Cool

Yes!! I call all my followers panda's! Just because there are so many, and especially for Anon's, as I don't exactly know your genders I don't want to misgender.

So I just came up with Panda as a nickname for my furry little pals :)

[deathxwalkerxx]

I’m sorry I got ghosted

But hey dodged a bullet right?

I suppose you're right about that panda! Just sucks when you're craving to have someone to cuddle up to and you just have more first dates in your life and can't figure out how you get to the next step.

I really thought her and I had a connection. Maybe it's a me issue.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Welp.

I guess you shouldn't get excited about a first date. Or the second, because people can quickly change.

[deathxwalkerxx]

how was the late?

It was good!! Now I'm just hoping to see if I'm worth a second one or if we're just going to be friends.

[deathxwalkerxx]

OH? HOW DID THE DATE GO?

It went so good!! I didn't know I could make someone laugh just from being my awkward self. And boy did she compliment me a lot. Which I didn't know what to do with because I've never gotten those types of compliments before.

Usually after a first date I get ghosted and never get a second one. Yet she's still talking to me and I have no idea what I did to deserve her attention honestly.

I'm still nervous, cause I'm just waiting for reality to crash down and just expect her to just disappear.

[deathxwalkerxx]

Congrats on the date !

Ahhh thank you so much!!! Honestly I'm still giddy about it!!