deeprelief-blog1

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nothing is stopping me from yanking these tubes from me and walking away. i have everything that should stop me but it’s not. not even my baby.

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u n w a n t e d

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I'm scared.

actually, I'm petrified. every day I feel lighter, every day I find it harder to pick up luna because I feel so tired and lifeless. I'm scared luke is falling out of love with me, every day I feel like he becomes more distant and every day we just get sicker and sicker.

I'm currently in the middle of a tour, away from my love and away from my baby. it isn't how it's supposed to be, but it's the way it is. I don't know how I feel, I feel numb and all of this is just drivel.

It's becoming a chore to be able to get up on stage, that isn't how it's supposed to be. If he is falling out of love, I wouldn't even blame him.

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I feel disgusting.

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Siga/Follow: @foitaodoce ♡

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the most beautiful human. I can't believe I'm lucky enough to be in love with you, spend every day with you, listen to your stupid singing every morning when you shower, everything about you is just perfect. we've had it tough recently, but things are getting better and we're going to be better.

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can you please fuck off?

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i cant breathe and i want the floor to open and swallow me up i cant breathe i cant see straight and i cant think properly 

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‘‘No wonder Harry said you were too much. You are. You're too much."

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20387) Why am I so obsessed with the idea of hospitalization? I feel like the only way I can prove to people that I'm hurting is to get hospitalized. I feel like the only way I'll for sure have an ED is if I get an NG tube down my nose. It's horrible and messed up.

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You will fall in love with someone who’s cold and always seemingly pushing you away. When all is said and done, they will be forever known as the one person you couldn’t get to love you. Unfortunately, it will hurt and sting worse than the good ones, the ones that chopped up your meat for you and picked out an eyelash from your eye and were nice to your mother, because love often feels like a game we need to win.

Ryan O’Connell, The People You Will Fall in Love With in Your 20s (via seulray)

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Everything has changed and yet, I am more me than I’ve ever been.

Iain Thomas, I Wrote This For You (via natural-magics)

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me: *thinks about love literally all day*

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I thought my mother was bad before I met Luke's. there can be no comparison between the two of them, I've never been called disgusting or been looked at with such hate and disgust in my 22 years on earth, I've never witnessed a mother tear her son up like that. I wanted to meet her so she knew how much I love Luke. I tried so desperately hard for nothing but heartache.

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recovery is not ‘soon i will be untouched, perfect, and in a permanent state of bliss. i will be healed and all will be well, forever.’

recovery is ‘i will continue to survive despite what happens, i will find ways to cope instead of continually tearing myself down. i will recover and will see myself in a light that i never thought was possible.’

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shout out to transboys, and femmeboys, and girly boys, and wears-wing-tipped-eyeliner boys, and shy boys, and asexual boys, and wears-skirts-and-is-straight boys, and bottom boys, and feminine bi boys, and has-only-female-friends boys, and crying boys, and demiboys, and manicured boys, and pacifist boys, and limp-wristed boys, and boys who need hugs, and boys who’ve self harmed, and boys with eating disorders, and boys with boobs, and boys with high pitched voices shout out to boys who feel no shame about how “feminine or weak” they seem or act

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boys with personality disorders are valid and important boys with eating disorders are valid and important boys with psychotic disorders are valid and important boys with mood disorders are valid and important boys with processing disorders and autism spectrum disorders are valid and important the media often tries to push the idea that boys can’t cry or be sensitive. in spite of that idea, boys are allowed to cry and be sensitive. neurodivergent boys matter.