dekuimagines

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Fake laughed at a customer's joke today and dropped the smile within milliseconds of them turning around. when I tell you that I felt like Patrick fucking Bateman

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jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:

I’m the best to ever do it

Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)

No one’s ever done it like me

I could be President/they should make me President

Behold, a mere fraction of my power!

The public wants to be me soooooo bad

I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)

How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?

Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix

I’m being sabotaged

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I’ve decided that all bats fall somewhere on this horrid little graph I’ve devised. Here are some prime examples of the various Creature Varieties found in nature.

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unfortunately The Character has now lived rent free in my head for so long they can claim squatters' rights

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@emilyscartoons sums it up perfectly💔 I'm heartbroken for all the people in the us that will be affected by this election, keep standing up for your rights and what you believe in❤️

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Hayao Miyazaki

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山の怪？？？　（トトロパロ）　

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the other day i started writing an office romance but i quickly remembered that i have no idea what working in an office is like

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you've heard of "my brother in Christ" now get ready for, an unarguably more gender neutral option:

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