demilardner

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when I was a kid you had to do the charlie the unicorn voice whether you liked it or not. you had to say candy mountain charlieeee in the voice. not like these days

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Can you believe it? This thing 👇 just told a lie.

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these guys look like theyre fighting over how to make a soup

"hey can i put this in"

"NO ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME IT'LL RUIN IT"

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but the good news is:

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I think that people who balk at the phrase "all cops are bastards" might be helped out with "good cops don't last."

Sooner or later, every cop will encounter a situation where they can be complicit or try to do something about it. A good cop will try to do something about it. They will encounter immediate resistance, and will be pressured to shut up and be complicit (whereupon they cease to be a good cop). If they persist, they can expect to be fired, harassed, thrown in a mental hospital, or even directly physically attacked and murdered.

Hell, if they're in the NYPD, after they're done with you they'll probably make a commemorative challenge coin about it.

All cops are bastards because good cops don't last. You are absolutely not allowed to be a good cop.

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LGBT+ games need to be better man i dont want to play gay dating sim/rpg maker game #48174 i want someone to make max payne with gay sex in it

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putting “lying to kids is ok” on the table immediately looks bad. but theres nuance. because kids deserve to have as much context and respect as anyone else you live with. but also. telling them that leaving doors open will make ants carry away the entire house is necessary until their brains can quantify the heating&air bill

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there’s a big difference between “food waste” as in “farmers destroy tons of food to avoid exceeding quotas” or “supermarkets throw away this much edible food because it doesn’t sell”

and “food waste” as in “it is not actually within the capacity of humans to perfectly predict and track household food consumption, so a certain amount of food per household inevitably goes bad and has to be thrown out every year”

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Embossed braille should be standard on computer keyboards. 

It would raise braille literacy more than anything else I could imagine - among both the blind and the sighted. Currently braille is actually vanishing due to an increasing reliance on audiobooks and screen readers. 

I think that braille has a lot of potential use among non-blind groups. As an alternative to traditional writing for dyslexics. As a way to help photosensitive people type with their eyes closed. Or simply as a means to help sighted people find things without needing the lights on all the time!

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this little freak keeps sneaking into my garden and rubbing himself all over my flowers??Hello?????

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It’s 2022 and this James Acaster bit continues to be relevant

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“Luh”

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You know what line gets me every time I watch MAD MAX FURY ROAD? 

“Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence.”

Think about that. “Addicted to water.” It makes it sound like water is an extra luxury that people don’t need but are greedy for, something they should be able to go without, and if they are desperate for it, it’s their own fault, and not the fault of the man who has all of it, and withholds it.

Think about how the people in power tell us not to be greedy for the things we need, like healthcare, like a living wage, like the right to be free of fear and violence in our own communities. The people in power tell us not to be greedy for these things, when they themselves already enjoy them freely, and withhold them from us.

Don’t trust the narrative that tells us we’re being greedy by asking for things that we need.

Don’t trust the asshole sitting on a grassy hilltop with his hand on the spigot telling us not to be greedy for water.

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whatever is going on with misha collins aside i think all discourse about celebrities like harry styles or whoever else “queerbaiting their audiences” is inherently stupid. reinforcing the norm of people being gnc without having to publicly come out is good, actually. you aren’t being queerbaited because a gnc person or someone who is physically intimate with members of the same gender exists and you don’t know their sexuality

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The Milt Kahl Head Swaggle (Source: Cartoon Brew)