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I’ve decided that my 20s are actually age 25 - 35

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need to have someone in love with me who’s a little freak about it

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HATE that were calling every recipe Marry Me [Recipe]…. Fucking hate that. How bout Frig My Clit Brownies. Kill Yourself At My Feet Pasta. Shut The Fuck Up And Pay My Grocery Bill Cookies (vegan).

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Bright red sky after a storm when I was working at Walmart a few years ago. Still one of my favorite pictures

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more of the bisexuals to stare at longingly

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I will continue being mean to thin people because the entire world is made for you but people like me can't get a diagnosis without threatening to sue the doctor <3

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Hey don't cry, okay? We just found Attenborough’s long-beaked echidna, a species thought to be extinct for the past 60 years.

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my coworker accidentally doordashed 8 baja blasts #bounteousblasts

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True love

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Could yall stop shooting each other outside my window im trying to masturbate

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• 👁👁 •

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The ability to turn reblogs off has really added a new dimension to shitty posts

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i don’t get ppl who are fine w period pussy. smelling like wet parking lot pennies

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pridehog

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so it turns out that time actually does go by faster as you get older. just like how adults told me it would when i was younger. pisses me off

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dreamt about a knight coming to you after a battle and getting on his knees in front of you and roaming his hands up your legs and smearing blood across your skin as he rests his cheek against your upper thigh. btw. additionally i would like to add taking his helmet off and hearing it rattle against the stone floor and running your hands through sweaty hair and praising him for protecting your kingdom. anyways.