dig-bickenergy-blog

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I thought he was gonna stick the tree up his butt

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Maybe I'm just allergic to being pretty

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Apparently Gen Z kids who want to push themselves off of bridges are not millennials but high on life AND death 👌

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Have you ever been on the verge of a mental breakdown so thickly coated in anger that you want to drown yourself?

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My biggest regret in life is not once saying "then wait bitch" after the teacher says "ill wait" in elementary or middle school because now I'm in high school and I'm too scared to do it

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No body who is my age right now should worry about losing a job later in life based on a background check on internet profiles and social media because when we are all old enough to have jobs that care about that stuff it'll be normal and everyone will have embarrassing shit that pops up.

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How safe do you think we would be if zombies could break any wood and metal but not glass?

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It used to be : ew, you drink your soda without a straw??? Ugh #germs

Now its: omg, you drink with a straw?!?!? Ugh # no love for the animals

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The titanic only sank because not enough people shipped jack with rose.

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When Ariana Grande said "rather your body than half of your heart". I felt that.

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Your birthday is also the anniversary of you meeting your parents for the first time.

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When I was like 9 I had a nightmare where I was spending the night at my grandmas house and while we were eating dinner and I had been there for several hours she told me that she had a psychic (think that's how you spell it) come to her house and she let about 10 cockroaches loose in the house. And then I went to bed and wouldn't go to sleep to the fear that a cockroach would crawl into my vagina while I was asleep.

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A Birthday Party

God: somethings missing. We have the song, the food and the gifts. What else could I be forgetting

Satan: (quietly) the human can not age until they have put out the fire that has burned for a year, blocking the delicacies that await them.

God: that's it! no one can eat until the human has made a wish and spit on the cake!

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Life Hak

If you can eat it with a fork, you can eat it with a spoon.

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What does a lesbian with a daddy kink say during some heated sex with her girl?

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Is no one gonna mention how Megan Trainor was right in the song All About That Bass? Everyone pushed it aside because it was literally a year before thikc girls werent considered fat and she was ahead of the times but now look at us. Those bitches who bashed Megan Trainor on Twitter for "thinking fat girls will ever be cute" are getting cocked blocked by their own eraser looking head ass selves.

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I was today years old when oh realized that every women who ever had sex with Brian on family guy, committed bestiality.