dispatchvampire

[dispatchvampire]

It's honestly such a shame that we've made such a huge thing out of swimming and swimsuits and looking good in swimsuits and fat people not looking good in swimsuits. Swimming is actually the perfect exercise for fat people because it puts zero pressure on the joints, which is a much bigger concern for us than it is for skinny people, and lets you exercise basically every muscle group without straining too much and risking injury. Yet somehow this is one of the least accessible exercises to fat people due to nothing more than a culture of body shaming. The work to unlearn all the shame to be comfortable in a bathing suit in front of strangers is huge even for conventionally attractive people, but I could probably count on one hand the number of fat people I've met who were confident enough to get in a bathing suit and go swimming in public.

And what is the exercise that somehow everyone thinks they should do instead? Jogging. It's more accessible, sure, it's easy and costs nothing to go outside and run. But I need you to understand telling a fat person to go running is basically telling them to go destroy their knees. Not to mention it's probably one of the most physically uncomfortable exercises to do when you have a body that jiggles even with compression garments.

Imagine a world where everyone had the ability and equal access to whatever exercise fit them best and helped them be happy and healthiest. Imagine a world where fat people go swimming.

[dispatchvampire]

[dispatchvampire]

Time traveling Roman: No I understand the moving pictures on your personal device, I was just wondering why you don't have a grain dole to feed your urban masses like we did even though you produce 1000 times as much food.

Me: Um... well... you see...

[dispatchvampire]

all that said the guy with my car insurance company who answered the phone was so fucking funny. he had a heavy Georgia accent which endeared me to him immediately and he was sooo worried about me and apologetic that there was no one to send to my aid and I said "that's okay. if i end up missing though they're gonna interview you as the last person who heard from me. what if there's a documentary?" and he said "ooooooo, can I start drama?" I said, "well, what kind?" And he said, "I'm gonna tell them you said you saw a green flash in the sky over the field and I heard strange voices then the line went dead."

genuinely obsessed with him to this very day.

[dispatchvampire]

Love me some Eliot Spencer.

The Many Flirting Styles of Eliot Spencer

Leverage 1x1- “The Nigerian Job”

Leverage 1x9- “The Stork Job”

Leverage 1x11- “The 12 Step Job”

Leverage 1x12- “The First David Job”

Leverage 1x13- “The Second David Job”

Leverage 2x2- “The Top Hat Job”

Leverage 2x7- “The Two Live Crew Job”

Leverage 2x10- “The Runway Job”

Leverage 3x4- “The Scheherazade Job”

Leverage 3x5- “The Double-Blind Job”

Leverage 3x6- “The Studio Job”

Leverage 3x11- “The Rashomon Job”

Leverage 3x11- “The Ho, Ho, Ho Job”

Leverage 4x8- “The Boiler Room Job”

Leverage 4x9- “The Cross my Heart Job”

Leverage 4x11- “The Experimental Job”

Leverage 4x14- “The Boys' Night Out Job”

Leverage 4x15- “The Lonely Hearts Job”

Leverage 5x6- “The D.B. Cooper Job”

Leverage 5x11- “The Low Low Price Job”

Leverage 5x14- “The Toy Job”

Leverage: Redemption 1x7- “The Double-Edged Sword Job”

Leverage: Redemption 1x8- “The Mastermind Job”

Leverage: Redemption 1x12- “The Golf Job”

Leverage: Redemption 3x2- “The Digital Frankenstein Job”

Leverage: Redemption 3x3- “The Scared Stiff Job”

[dispatchvampire]

[dispatchvampire]

[dispatchvampire]

Pizza Index strikes again.

Trump is trying to play this like he and his administration had no knowledge of Israel's attack on Iran, but the Index never lies.

[dispatchvampire]

From a state hearing in Texas

[dispatchvampire]

I hate when a tiny stupid thing pushes you over the edge and makes you freak the fuck out because it makes you look like a completely irrational tar pit of a human being. Like no I promise this is warranted just maybe not about that specifically I swear I'm well adjusted. Come closer stick your fingers in my cage

[dispatchvampire]

I love how all of the Batman villains are like “ah he’s not at the manor, it’s defenseless! and then alfred just racks an AK-47 and is like pull up bitch

[dispatchvampire]

[dispatchvampire]

texts from my father continue

[dispatchvampire]

Trump could not have made America look more weak. Republicans ruin everything they touch.

It was not a parade. It was a sad charade.

[dispatchvampire]

No transphobes allowed, only transborbs.

Check out my stuff!

✧Read Namesake✧ ✧Read Crow Time✧ ✧Store✧ ✧Patreon✧

[dispatchvampire]

[dispatchvampire]

This blog is my adult version of cutting pictures out of magazines and glueing them on to paper