doe-of-artemis

[doe-of-artemis]

the purpose of friends is to have people who unconditionally hate your shitty exes & relatives. like maybe YOU have a complex relationship with your father but i sure don't. i'm outside his house with a gun. he's not the unforgivable asshole who raised me he's just an unforgivable asshole

[doe-of-artemis]

god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait

[doe-of-artemis]

[doe-of-artemis]

You know I'm gonna be honest. I don't think all these apps really need access to my precise location

[doe-of-artemis]

[doe-of-artemis]

The good feeling when a little cat rests their head against you like you’re a pillow is actually pretty significant

[doe-of-artemis]

Why don't they make stained glass fish tanks? Give those fish Catholic guilt

[doe-of-artemis]

[doe-of-artemis]

I copy pasted parts of this but I do hand letter everything, because while I'm trying to work easier as I'm chronically ill, I am still chronically stupid

[doe-of-artemis]

Dropout didn't spend $15,000 on Seal's Kiss from a Rose. They spent $30,000.

[doe-of-artemis]

[doe-of-artemis]

"the new pope is problematic" well folks it's the catholic fucking church so im not really sure where your hopes were at

[doe-of-artemis]

I hate calling in sick I don't want to inform anyone about my abnormal bowel movements

[doe-of-artemis]

to all the warriors who will feel pressured to shave their legs now that it’s warm enough to wear shorts… HOLD THE LINE!!!

[doe-of-artemis]

you ever watch something and just think... "god i cannot wait to get on ao3 after this"

[doe-of-artemis]

thank you mother