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doeeyedseer · 6 months ago

Text

Some positive things said about elain.

“Elain had always been gentle and sweet—and I had considered it a different sort of strength. A better strength. To look at the hardness of the world and choose, over and over, to love, to be kind. She had been always so full of light."

"I gazed again at that sad, dark house—the place that had been a prison. Elain had said she missed it, and I wondered what she saw when she looked at the cottage. If she beheld not a prison but a shelter—a shelter from a world that had possessed so little good, but she tried to find it anyway, even if it had seemed foolish and useless to me. She had looked at that cottage with hope; I had looked at it with nothing but hatred. And I knew which one of us had been stronger."

"'Elain nodded, smiling up at me, and it was tentative joy—and life that shone in her eyes. A promise of the future, gleaming and sweet. "

"But Elain, the flower-grower, the gentle heart"

"She had come alive here and her joy was infectious. There wasn't a servant or gardener who didn't smile at her, and even the brusque head cook found excuses to bring her plates of cookies an tarts at various points in the day. I marveled at it, actually- that hose years of poverty hadn't stripped away that light from Elain, Perhaps buried it a bit but she was generous loving and kind- a woman I found myself proud to know, to call sister."

“Beautiful—she’d always been the most beautiful of us. Soft and lovely, like a summer dawn.”

“That smile grew, bright enough that it lit up even Azriel’s shadows across the room.”

“Elain quietly washed his face. Combed out his hair and beard. Straightened his clothes. She found flowers—somewhere. She laid them at his head, on his chest. We stared down at him in silence. “I love you,” Elain whispered, voice breaking.”

"The Cauldron seemed to realize what she’d done, too, as his head thumped onto the mossy ground. That Elain … Elain had defended this thief. Elain, who it had gifted with such powers, found her so lovely it had wanted to give her something … It would not harm Elain, even in its hunt to reclaim what had been taken.”

"Nesta was wrong, Cassian realized, to think Elain as loyal and loving as a dog. Elain saw everything Nesta had done and understood. "

"For a moment, I just stared at my sister, the wisdom she'd spoken. Not a whisper of those oracular abilities. Just clear eyes and an open expression. "

"I think she’s kind, and I’ll take kindness over nastiness any day. But I also think we haven’t yet seen all she has to offer.” A corner of his mouth tugged upward. “Don’t forget that gardening often results in something pretty, but it involves getting one’s hands dirty along the way.”

"She loves her garden. Always loved growing things. Even when we were destitute, she managed to tend a little garden in the warmer months. And when - when our fortune returned, she took to tending and planting the most beautiful gardens you’ve ever seen. Even in Prythian. It drove the servants mad, because they were supposed to do the work and ladies were only meant to clip a rose here and there, but Elain would put on a hat and gloves and kneel in the dirt, weeding. She acted like a purebred lady in every regard but that."

"and Elain was so gentle, so sweet …"

“My sister Elain can convince anyone to do anything with a few smiles.”

“Elain, who had been gentle and sweet. Elain, who was to marry a lord’s son who hated faeries …”

“Even wasted away by grief and despair, Elain’s beauty was remarkable. Hers was a face that could bring kings to their knees."

“Nesta met her sister's warm brown eyes. When human, elain had easily been the prettiest of the three of them, and when she'd been turned High Fae, that beauty had been amplified. Nesta couldn't put her finger on what changes had been wrought beyond the pointed ears, but Elain had gone from lovely to devastatingly beautiful. Elain never seemed to realize it.”

“Including Elain, who is more than capable of defending herself against the darkness of the Trove, if she chooses to. Don’t underestimate her.”

“Elain, mourn as she might for the life she would have had with Graysen, had found a place, a role here. Tending to the gardens of Feyre’s veritable palace on the river, helping other residents of Velaris restore their own destroyed gardens—she had purpose, and joy, and friends: those two half-wraiths who worked in Rhysand’s household. But those things had always come easily to her sister. Had always made Elain special."

"I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. "

"Lost to whatever fog of memory had crept over him, he was smiling mildly at his beloved Elain, the only one of us who bothered to really speak to him at all."

"There was a slight sparkle in her brown eyes.As if she’d been enjoying herself with them. I put a hand in my chest, leaning against the wood panels of the stair wall. Rhys’s hand covered my own a heartbeat later. “that was what I felt,” he said, “when I saw you smile that night we dined along the Sidra,”

“Some were as lovely as you, Elain,” Rhys said from beside Feyre"

"I smiled at my sister, memorizing her lovely face, and wiped her tears away. "

"My sister was beaming, content- prettier then I'd ever seen her, even in her simple muslin gardening dress. Her cheeks were flushed beneath her large, floppy hat.

"Her face had somehow become more beautiful- infinitely beautiful, and her ears...Elain's ears were now pointed beneath her sodden hair."

"The cauldron purred in Elain's presence as the King of Hybern slumped to his knees, clawing at the knife jutting through his throat. "

"The faelights gilded Elain's unbound hair, making her glow like the sun at dawn. "

"Elain stood at the wall of windows, clad in a lilac gown whose close-fitting bodice showed how well her sister had filled out since those initial days in the Night Court. Gone were the sharp angles, replaced by softness and elegant curves."

"Her sister turned toward her, glowing with health. Elain’s smile was as bright as the setting sun beyond the windows."

"I'll do it," Elain said, taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders. She didn't wait for either of us before she strode out , graceful as a doe."

"Her mouth tightened, the only sign of anger in her graceful countenance. "

"but something in me eased at that laughter, at the light thay returned to Elain's eyes. A light I wouldn't see dimmed further. "

Bonus:

" I knew they’d both die the moment that power hit them. Anything, I begged the Cauldron. Anything— The king’s hand began to drop. And then halted. A choking noise came out of him. For a moment, I thought the Cauldron had answered my pleas. But as a black blade broke through the king’s throat, spraying blood, I realized someone else had. Elain stepped out of a shadow behind him, and rammed Truth-Teller to the hilt through the back of the king’s neck as she snarled in his ear, “Don’t you touch my sister.”

“Elain was the only one who guessed. She caught me vomiting two mornings in a row. " She nodded toward Azriel. "I think she's got you beat for secret-keeping.".

“I mean, she’s been brave when she had to be, but she’s never been confrontational.”

“But I wonder if everyone has spent so long assuming Elain is sweet and innocent that she felt she had to be that way or else she’d disappoint you all.” He sighed toward the ceiling. “With time and safety, perhaps we’ll see a different side of her emerge.”

#elain archeron

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doeeyedseer · 9 months ago

Text

Elriel Masterpost

ACOMAF:

Chapter 24 Page 257-58

A faint smile bloomed upon Azriel’s mouth as he noticed Elain’s fingers white-knuckled on that fork, but he kept silent…

Elain said, "It’s all very disorienting."

"I can imagine," Azriel said. Cassian flashed him a glare. But Azriel’s attention was on my sister, a polite, bland smile on his face. Her shoulders loosened a bit.

[Skip a part]

Elain said to Azriel, perhaps the only two civilized ones here, "Can you truly fly?"

He set down his fork, blinking. I might have even called him self-conscious. He said, "Yes. Cassian and I hail from a race of faeries called Illyrians. We're born hearing the song of the wind."

"That's very beautiful," she said. "Is it not-frightening, though? To fly so high?"

"It is sometimes," Azriel said. Cassian tore his relentless attention from Nesta long enough to nod his agreement. "If you are caught in a storm, if the current drops way. But we are trained so thoroughly that the fear is gone before we're out of swaddling."

[Skip]

Rhys chuckled, Cassian's wrath slipping enough that he grinned, and Elain, noticing Azriel's ease as proof that things weren't indeed about to go badly, offered one of her own as well.

Chapter 50

"And I think Elain- Elain would like it, too. Though she'd probably cling to Azriel, just to have some peace and quiet. "

I smiled at the thought- at how handsome they would be together. If the warrior every stopped quietly loving Mor.

Acowar

Chapter 24 Pg 253-54

Azriel arrived first, no shadows to be seen, my sister a pale, golden mass in his arms. He, too, wore his Illyrian armor, Elain's golden brown hair snagging in some of the black scales across his chest and shoulders.

He set her down gently on the foyer carpet having carried her in through the front door.

Elain peered up at his patient, solemn face.

Azriel smiled faintly. "Would you like me to show you the garden?"

She seemed so small before him, so fragile compared to the scales of his fighting leathers, the breadth of shoulders, the wings peeking over them.

But Elain did not balk from him, did not shy away as she nodded- just once.

Azriel, graceful as any courtier, offered her an arm. I couldn't tell if she was looking at his blue Siphon or at his scarred skin beneath as she breathed, "Beautiful."

Color bloomed high on Azriel's golden-brown cheeks, but he inclined his head in thanks and led my sister toward the back doors in the garden, sunlight bathing them.

Chapter 24 Pg 254

“Cassian and Lucien appeared, neither looking at the other. But Lucien’s attention went right to the hallway toward the back, his nostrils flaring as he scented Elain’s direction. And who she’d gone with.

A low snarl slipped out of him—

“Relax,” Rhys said. “Azriel isn’t the ravishing type.”

Chapter 24 Pg: 256-59

"Azriel knows you're watching," Rhys drawled from where he stood before the mirror in our bedroom, adjusting the lapels of his black jacket.

My hair still damp from the bath I'd just taken, I slid my heavy earring through my lobes and peered out our bedroom window, monitoring the garden below.

Elain sat silently at on the the wrought-iron tables, a cup of tea before her. Azriel was sprawled on the chaise longue across the gray stones, sunning his wings and reading what looked to be a stack of reports- likely information on the Autumn Court that he planned to present to Rhys once he'd sorted through it all. Already dressed for the Hewn City- the brutal, beautiful armor so at odds with the lovely garden. And my sister sitting within it.

"Why not make them mates?" I mused. "Why Lucien?"

"I'd keep that question from Lucien."

"I'm serious." I turned toward him and crossed my arms. "What decides it? Who decides it?"

Rhys straightened his lapels before plucking an invisible piece of lint from them. "Fate, the Mother, the Cauldron's swirling eddies..."

"Rhys."

"You said your mother and father were wrong for each other; Tamlin said his own parents were wrong for each other. So it can't be a perfect system of matching. What if"-I jerked my chin toward the window, to my sister and the shadowsinger in the garden- "That is what she needs? Is there no free will? What if Lucien wishes the union but she doesn't?"

"A mating bond can be rejected, " Rhys said mildly, "There is choice. And sometimes, yes- the bond picks poorly. Sometimes, the bond is nothing more than some.. preordained guesswork at who will provide the strongest offspring. At its basest level, it's perhaps only that. Some natural function, not an indication of true, paired souls." A smile at me- at the rareness perhaps of what we had.

[skipping a part]

"Do you think she and Lucien match well?"

"You know them better than I do. But I will say that Lucien is loyal-fiercely so."

"So is Azriel."

Chapter 28 pg. 297

The ancient healer jerked her chin toward Lucien." See what he can do. If anyone can sense if something is amiss, it's a mate."

Chapter 27 pg.286

“No. I … I was sleeping, but I heard …” She shook her head. Blinked at our formal attire, the dark crown atop my head—and Rhysand’s. “I didn’t hear you.”

Azriel stepped forward. “But you heard something else.”

Elain seemed about to nod, but only backed away. "I think I was dreaming, "She murmured. "I think I'm always dreaming these days."

"Let me get you some hot milk, " I said, putting a hand on her elbow to guide her into the sitting room.

But Elain shook me off, heading back to the stairs. She said as she climbed the first steps, "I can hear her-crying."

I gripped the bottom post the bannister. "Who?"

"Everyone thinks she's dead." Elain kept walking. "But she's not. Only-different. Changed as I was"

"Who?" I pushed.

But Elain continued up the stairs, that shawl drooping down her back. Nesta stalked from Cassian's side to approach my own. We bother sucked in a breath, to say what, I didn't know but-

“What did you see,” Azriel said, and I tried not to flinch as I found him at my other side, not having seen him move. Again.

Elain paused halfway up the stairs. Slowly, she turned to look back at him. “I saw young hands wither with age. I saw a box of black stone. I saw a feather of fire land on snow and melt it.”

My stomach dropped to the floor. One glance at Nesta confirmed that she felt it too, saw it.

Mad. Elain might very well have gone mad—

“It was angry,” Elain said quietly. “It was so, so angry that something was taken. So it took something from them as punishment.”

We said nothing, I didn’t know what to say—what to even ask or demand. If the cauldron had done something to her as well…

I faced Azriel, exposing my palms to him. “What does that mean?”

Azriel’s hazel eyes churned as he studied my sister, her too-thin body. And without a word, he winnowed away. Mor watched the space where he’d been standing long after he was gone.

Chapter 30

The two Illyrians paused their inspection of me long enough to note my sisters finishing up my breakfast, Nesta in a pale gray gown that brought out the steel in her eyes, Elain in dusty pink.

Both males went a bit still. But Azriel sketched a bow- while Cassian stalked for the table for the dining table, reached right over Nesta's shoulder, and grabbed a muffin from its little basket. "Morning, Nesta," he said around a mouth of blueberry-lemon. "Elain."

[Skip]

Cassian's dark brows narrowed. I dragged a hand over my face before going to Elain and touching her too-bony shoulder. “Can I set you up in the garden? The herbs you planted are coming in nicely.”

“I can help her” said Azriel, stepping to the table as Elain silently rose. No shadows at his ear, no darkness ringing from his fingers as he extended a hand.

Nesta monitored him like a hawk, but kept silent as Elain took his hand, and out they went.

Chapter 32 pg. 334

"No." Elain studied me, then her. "Not that one. The other."

Nesta took a steadying breath, opening her mouth to either whisk Elain upstairs or move on.

But Azriel asked softly, taking a single step over the threshold and into the sitting room, "What other?"

Elain's brows twitched toward each other. “The queen–with the feathers of flame.”

The shadowsinger angled his head.

Lucien murmured to me, eyes still fixed on Elain, "Should we- does she need...?"

"She doesn't need anything," Azriel answered without so much as looking at Lucien.

Elain was staring at the spymaster now-unblinkingly.

"We're the ones who need..." Azriel trailed off. "A seer," he said, more to himself than us. "The Cauldron made you a seer."

Chapter 33

“It made sense, I supposed, that Azriel alone had listened to her. The male who heard things others could not…Perhaps he, too, had suffered as Elain had before he understood what gift he possessed.” He asked Elain, "There is another queen?"

Elain squinted, as if the question required some inner clarification, some...path into looking the right way at whatever had addled and plagued her. "Yes."

[skip part]

But Azriel nodded. "You knew," he said to Elain. "About the young queen turning into a crone."

Elain blinked and blinked, eyes clearing again. As if the understanding, our understanding... it freed her from whatever murky realm she'd been in.

"The sixth queen is alive?" Azriel asked, calm and steady, the voice of the High Lord's spymaster, who had broken enemies and charmed allies.

"Elain cocked her head, as if listening to some inner voice. "Yes."

ACOWAR Chapter 50

Mor took Nesta and Cassian by the hand, readying to winnow them to the camp, while shadows gathered around Azriel, Elain at his side, wide-eyed at the spymaster’s display.

[skip]

Then Azriel, gently taking Elain’s hand is his own, as if afraid his scars would hurt her.

Chapter 63

But Azriel asked softly, "What about Elain?"

[skip part]

Azriel stalked to my side, right into the tent where Nesta had now come to her feet. He tucked his wings in tightly as he squeezed through the narrow space, ignoring Nesta's snarl of warning, and knelt at the cot.

He ran a scarred hand over the rumpled blankets. "They're still warm."

Chapter 64

"We'll get her back, Cassian rasped.

Nesta lowered her hands, lifting her head. Her eyes were red rimmed, lips thin. "No you will not." She pointed to the map on the table. "I saw that army. Its size, who is in it. I saw it, and there is no change of any of you getting into its heart. Even you," she added when Cassian opened his mouth again. "Especially not when you're injured."

And what Hybern would do to Elain, might already be doing-

From the shadows near the entrance to the tent, Azriel said, as if in answer to some upspoken debate. "I'm getting her back."

Nesta slid her gaze the the shadowsinger. Azriel's hazel eyes glowed golden in the shadows.

Nesta said, "Then you will die."

Azriel only repeated rage glazing that stare. "I'm getting her back."

With the shadows, he might stand a change of slipping in. But there were wards to consider, and ancient magic, and the king with those spells and the Cauldron...

For a moment, I saw that set of paints Elain had once bought me with the extra money she'd saved. The red, yellow, and blue I'd savored, used to paint that dresser in our cottage. I had not painted in years at that point, had not dared spend the money myself... But Elain had.

I stood. Met Azriel's wrathful stare.

"I'm going with you." I said.

Azriel only nodded.

[Skip part]

"I need one of your Siphons," I said to Azriel. The blue was slightly deeper but at night... they might not notice the difference.

He held out his palm, a round, flat blue stone appearing in it, and chucked it to me. I wrapped my fingers wound the warm stone, its power throbbing in my veins like an unearthly heartbeat.

[skip part]

Azriel was honing Truth-Teller with relentless focus.

Chapter 65

Azriel's shadow-hand grasped my own, tugging me closer. His rage rippled off his invisible form.

[skip part]

Elain was in her nightgown. Gagged, wrists wrapped in steel that glowed violet. Her eyes went wide as she saw us- Azriel and me-

I shifted my face back into my own, raising a hand to my lips as Azriel knelt before her. I kept up my litany of praying, beseeching the Cauldron to make my womb fruitful, on and on-

Azriel gently removed the gag from her mouth. "Are you hurt?"

She shook her head, devouring the sight of him as if not quite believing it. "You came for me." The shadowsinger only inclined his head.

[skip]

Azriel scooped up Elain, looping her bound arms around his neck. “Hold tight,” He ordered her, “and don’t make a sound.”

[skip]

"Grab onto him!" Elain ordered the wide-eyed human girl as Azriel thundered toward her. The girl looked like a doe about to be run down by a wolf.

The girl did not open her arms as they near.

Elain screamed at her, "If you want to live, do it now!"

The girl dropped her cloak, opened her arms wide.

Her black hair streamed behind Azriel, catching amongst his wings as he practically tackled her in the sky. But I saw, even as I ran, Elain's pale hand lurch- gripping the girl by her neck holding her as tightly as she could.

And just in time.

One of the hounds broke free from Tamlin in a mighty leap. I l ducked, bracing for impact.

But it was not aiming for me. Two bounding strides down the stone ledge and another leap-

Azriel's roar echoed off the rocks as the hound slammed into him, dragging those shredding talons down his spine, his wings-

The girl screamed, but Elain moved. As Azriel battled to keep them airborne, keep his grip on them, my sister sent a fierce kick into the beast's face. Its eye. Another. Another.

It bellowed, and Elain slammed her bare, muddy foot into its face again. The blow struck home.

With a yelp of pain, it released its claws- and plunged into the ravine.

So fast. It happened so fast. And blood- blood sprayed from his back, his wings-

[skip]

The king fired another arrow-two. one for me, one soaring for Elain's exposed back. Azriel slammed both away with a blue shield.

[skip]

The gray light of morning had broken over the world, mist clinging to our ankles as we headed into the camp, Azriel still cradling Elain to his chest. He dripped blood behind him the entire time- a trickle compared to the torrent that should be leaking out. Contained only the the patches of power he's slapped on it. Help- he needed a healer immediately.

[skip]

She (briar) only gazed at the tents, the soldiers who stumbled out. One saw Azriel and shouted for a healer to hurry for the spymaster's tent.

Rhys winnowed into our path before we'd made it past the first line of tents. His eyes went right to Azriel's wings, then the wound in my shoulder, the paleness of my face. To Elain, then Briar.

"I couldn't leave her," I said, surprised to find my own voice raw.

Running steps approached, and then Nesta rounded a tent, skidding to a halt in the mud.

She let out a sob at the sight of Elain, still in Azriel's arms.

{skip}

Rhys lunged for Azriel, taking Elain from him and gently setting my sister down. Azriel rasped, swaying on his feet, "We need Helion to get these chains off her."

Yet Elain didn't seem to notice them as she rose up on her toes and kissed the shadowsinger's cheek. And then walked to me and Nesta, who pulled back long enough to survey Elain's clean face, her clear eyes.

"We need to get you to Thesan, Rhys said to Azriel. "Right now."

ACOWAR Chapter 69

Azriel, still limping, merely nudged aside Cassian and extended another option. “This is Truth-Teller.” He told her softly. “I won’t be using it today—so I want you to.”

Elain’s eyes widened at the obsidian-hilted blade in Azriel’s scarred hand. The runes on the dark scabbard. “It has never failed me once.” The shadowsinger said, the midday sun devoured by the dark blade. “Some people say it is magic and will always strike true.” He gently took her hand and pressed the hilt of the legendary blade into it. “It will serve you well.”

Cassian gawked at Azriel, and I wondered how often Azriel had lent out that blade. “Never.” Rhys said from where he finished buckling on his own weapons against the side of the wagon. “I have never once seen Azriel let another person touch that knife.”

Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade. I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and Dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection…that knife.

ACOWAR Chapter 80

“What now?” Elain mused, at last answering my question from moments ago as her attention drifted to the windows facing the sunny street. That smile grew, bright enough that it lit up even Azriel’s shadows across the room. "I would like to build a garden," She declared. "after all of this.. I think the world needs more gardens."

ACOSAF

Chapter 7

“Send Lucien, then. As our human emissary.”

I studied the tenseness in Azriel’s shoulders, the shadows veiling half of him from the sunlight. “Lucien is away right now.”

Az’s brows rose. “Where?”

I winked at him. “You’re my spymaster. Shouldn’t you know?”

Az crossed his arms, face as elegant and cold as the legendary dagger at his side. “I don’t make a point of looking after his movements.”

“Why?”

Not a flicker of emotion. “He is Elain’s mate.”

I waited.

“It would be an invasion of her privacy to track him.”

To know when and if Lucien sought her out. What they did together.

“You sure about that?” I asked quietly.

Azriel’s Siphons guttered, the stones turning as dark and foreboding as the deepest sea.

[skip]

“Az ran a hand through his dark hair. “Are we…” unusual for him to stumble with words. “Are we supposed to get the sister’s presents?”

“No.” I said, and meant it. Az seemed to lose a sigh of relief. Seemed to, since all but a breath of air passed from his lips. “I don’t think Nesta gives a shit, and I don’t think Elain expects to receive anything from us. I’d leave the sisters to exchange presents amongst themselves.”

Az nodded distantly.

Chapter 12

Elain’s voice was colder than usual. I glanced at Nuala and Cerridwen, the latter giving me a shake of her head as if to say, Not a good day for her.

“Don’t.” Elain said flatly, starting once more into a walk, veils of steam drifting past her shoulders from the roasted rosemary potatoes in her hands, as if they were Azriel’s shadows.”

Azriel emerged from the sitting room, a glass of wine in his hand and wings tucked back to reveal his fine, yet simple black jacket and pants. I felt, more than saw, my sister go still as he approached. Her throat bobbed.

But I strode to my seat—nestled between Amren and Mor—in time to see Elain say to Azriel, “Hello.” Az said nothing. No, he just moved toward her. Mor tensed beside me. But Azriel only took Elain’s heavy dish of potatoes from her hands, his voice soft as night as he said, “Sit. I’ll take care of it.” Elain’s hands remained in midair, as if the ghost of the dish remained between them. With a blink, she lowered them, and noticed her apron. “I—I’ll be right back.” She murmured, and hurried down the hall before I could explain that no one cared if she showed up to dinner covered in flour and that she should just sit.

[skip]

“One moment, his hand was spearing toward the serving spoon. The next, it was stopped, Azriel’s scarred fingers wrapped around his wrist. “Wait.” Azriel said, nothing but command in his voice. Mor gaped wide enough that I was certain the half-chewed green beans in her mouth were going to tumble onto her plate.”

Azriel didn’t let go. “Wait until everyone is seated before eating.”

Elain swept in, apron gone and hair rebraided. “Please don’t wait on my account.” She said, taking the seat at the head of the table.

[skip]

“I’d feel bad for the mice.” Azriel muttered. Mor and Cassian howled, earning a blush from Azriel and a grateful smile from Elain—and no shortage of scowling from Amren. But something in me eased at that laughter, at the light that returned to Elain’s eyes.

Chapter 16

Azriel strode to the lone window at the end of the room and peered in the garden below.

[skip]

"If Lucien shows, " I corrected.

"My money's on yes," Cassian said. "Want to make a wager?"

"No," Azriel said, not turning from the window.

[Skip]

Azriel remained at the window.

Chapter 19

“I made to move toward Elain, but someone beat me to it. The shadowsinger was clad in a black jacket and pants similar to Rhysand’s—the fabric immaculately tailored and built to fit his wings. He still wore his Siphons atop either hand, and shadows trailed his footsteps, curling like swirled embers, but there was little sign of the warrior otherwise. Especially, as he gently said to my sister, “Happy Solstice.” Elain turned from the snow falling in the darkness beyond and smiled slightly.

Chapter 20

“Oh, that’s from me.”

Azriel’s face didn’t so much a shift at the words. Not even a smile as he opened the present and revealed—

“I had Madja make it for me.” Elain explained. Azriel’s brows narrowed at the mention at the family’s preferred healer. “It’s a powder to mix in with any drink.”

Silence.

Elain bit her lip and then smiled sheepishly. “It’s for the headaches everyone always gives you. Since you rub your temples so often.”

Silence again.

Then Azriel tipped his head back and laughed. I’d never heard such a sound, deep and joyous.

Azriel mastered himself enough to say “thank you.” I’d never seen his hazel eyes so bright, the hues of green amid the brown and gray like veins of emerald. “This will be invaluable.”

Chapter 22

Azriel and Elain remained in the sitting room, my sister showing him the plans she’d sketched to expand the garden in the back of the town house, using the seeds and tools my family had given her tonight. Whether he cared about such things, I had no idea.

ACOSF

chapter 3

Cassian said tightly, "He says he’d rather stay up here than at the river house." That made two of them. ‘"Why?"

"I don’t know. He’s Az. He likes his space.”

(Note: It's because of Elain.)

Chapter 19

“At least you’re honest.” Azriel smirked. “You and Nesta are wanted down there.”

“Because of the shit with Elain?”

Azriel stilled. “What happened to Elain?”

Cassian waved a hand. “A fight with Nesta. Don’t bring it up,” he warned when Azriel’s eyes darkened. Cassian blew out a breath. “I take that as a no regarding the meeting topic, then.” "It’s about what I discovered. Rhys said he requires you both there.” “It’s bad, then.” Cassian surveyed the shadows gathered around Az. “You all right?”

His brother nodded. “Fine.” But shadows still swarmed him.”

Chapter 21

“Maybe you’ll become interesting at last, Elain."

Nesta saw the blow land, like a physical impact, in Elain’s face, her posture. No one spoke, though shadows gathered in the corners of the room, like snakes preparing to strike. Elain’s eyes brightened with pain.

[skip]

Feyre smiled. “Elain was the only one who guessed. She caught me vomiting two mornings in a row.” She nodded toward Azriel. “I think she’s got you beat for secret-keeping.”

ACOSF Chapter 22

Azriel stiffened. “I know. I helped rescue Elain, after all.” Az hadn’t so much as hesitated before going into the heart of Hybern’s war-camp.

[skip]

“Do you want a child?”

“It doesn’t matter what I want.” Distant words—ones that prevented Cassian from prying further. He was still happy to be Mor’s buffer with Azriel, but there’d been a change lately. In both of them. Mor no longer sat beside Cassian, draped herself over him, and Azriel…those longing glances toward her had become few and far between. As if he’d given up. After five hundred years, he’d somehow given up. Cassian couldn’t think why.”

Chapter 23

Where have you been exercising these days?"

"Here," Azriel said. "At night." After he returned from spying on their enemies.

"Can't sleep?" Cassian took up a fighting stance.

A shadow curled around Azriel's neck, the only one brave enough to face the sunlight. "Something like that," he said, and settled into his own stance across from Cassian.

Cassian let it drop, knowing Az would have told him already if he'd wanted to share what had been hounding him enough to exercise at night, rather than in the morning with them.

"Well?" He asked Az. "Why don't you show me what all that nighttime brooding has resulted in?"

chapter 29

Azriel stiffened, an outright sign of temper from him as he said quietly, "There is an innate darkness to the Dread Trove that Elain should not be exposed to."

"But Nesta should?” Cassian growled.

Chapter 30 “No. But we need to summon Lucien,’ Azriel said, just a shade tightly, as if he didn’t like it one bit.”

Chapter 31

Nesta said, "The trove. And what happened the last time I scried."

Feyre said, "We won't allow any harm to come to Elain. Rhys warded her this morning, and we have eyes on her at all times."

"Eyes can be blinded," Nesta said.

Not the ones under my command,” Azriel said with soft menace. Nesta met his stare, knowing he was the only one aside from Feyre who could truly understand her hesitation. He’d gone with Feyre into the heart of Hybern’s camp to save Elain—he knew the risk. “We won’t make the same mistake twice.”

She believed him.

Chapter 44

"She made ballrooms into battlefields and plotted like any general. Like you two," she said, nodding to Cassian, and then, a bit more shyly, to Azriel. Azriel offered her a small smile that Elain quickly looked away from.

Cassian tucked away his puzzlement. Lucien was certainly not here to snarl at any male who looked at her for too long.

Chapter 58 - Winter Solstice

“You came,” Elain said behind her, and Nesta started, not having heard her sister approach. She scanned Elain from head to toe, wondering if she’d been taking lessons in stealth either from Azriel or the two half-wraiths she called friends.

[skip]

Azriel stood in the doorway, monitoring them. As if he’d heard Elain’s sharp laugh and wondered what had caused it.

"I was just checking on dessert," Elain explained as they approached the doorway and Azriel. Nesta met the shadowsinger’s stare and he gave her a nod. Then his gaze shifted to Elain, and though it was utterly neutral, something charged went through it. Between them. Elain’s breath caught slightly, and she gave him a shallow nod of greeting before brushing past, leading Nesta into the room.

[Skip]

Azriel lingered near the door, quiet enough that when Feyre and Mor began talking about some of her paintings, Nesta went over to him.

"Why don’t you sit?’ [Nesta] leaned against the doorway beside the shadowsinger.

"My shadows don’t like the flames so much." A pretty lie. She’d seen Azriel before the fire plenty. But she looked at who sat close to it and knew the answer.

"Why did you come if it torments you so much?"

"Because Rhys wants me here. It’d hurt him if I didn’t come.”

Shadows darkened his eyes, full of enough pain that she couldn’t stop herself from touching his shoulder. Letting him see that she understood why he stood in the doorway, why he wouldn’t go near the fire.

His secret to tell, never hers.

Bonus Chapter

The river house had finally fallen quiet after the raucous Winter Solstice party, the faelights dimming to cast little pools of gold amid the deep shadow of the longest night of the year.

Amren, Mor, and Varian had finally gone to bed, but Azriel found himself lingering downstairs.

He knew he should get some sleep. He'd need it come dawn, for the snowball battle up at the cabin. Cassian had mentioned no less than six times tonight that he had a secret plan regarding his so-called impending victory. Az had let his brother boast. Especially since Azriel had been planning his own victory for a year now.

Cassian wouldn't know what was coming for him. And Az fully planned on capitalizing on the fact that Nesta likely wouldn't let Cassian sleep much tonight.

Az snickered to himself, to the listening shadows around him.

Sleep, they seemed to whisper in his ear. Sleep.

I wish I could, he answered silently. But sleep so rarely found him these days.

Too many razor-sharp thoughts sliced him any time he grew still long enough for them to strike. Too many wants and needs left his skin overheated and pulling taut across his bones. So he slept only when his body gave out, and even then only for a few hours,

Azriel surveyed the empty family room, presents and ribbons littering the furniture. Cassian and Nesta hadn't reappeared downstairs, though that came as no surprise. He was elated for his brother and yet…

Azriel couldn't stop it. The envy in his chest. Of Cassian, and Rhys.

He knew he'd be swallowed by it if he went up to his bedroom, so he'd remained down here by the dying light of the fire.

But even the silence weighed too heavily, and though the shadows kept him company, as they always had, as they always would, he found himself leaving the room. Entering the foyer.

Soft steps padded from under the stair archway, and there she was.

The faelights gilded Elain's unbound hair, making her glow like the sun at dawn. She halted, her breath catching in her throat.

“I..." He watched her swallow. She clutched a small gift in her hands. "I was coming to leave this on your pile of presents. I forgot to give it to you earlier."

Lie. Well, the second part was a lie. He didn't need his shadows to read her tone, the slight tightening of her face. She'd waited until everyone was asleep before venturing back down, where she'd leave her gift amongst his other, opened presents, subtle and unnoticed.

Elain closed the distance, and her breathing quickened as she again paused, now a scant foot away. She extended the wrapped gift, her hand shaking. "Here."

Az tried not to look at his scarred fingers as they took the gift. She hadn't bought her mate a present. But she'd gotten Azriel one last year -- a headache powder he kept on his nightstand at the House of Wind. Not to use, but just to look at. Which he'd done every night he’d slept there. Or attempted to sleep there.

Azriel unwrapped the box, glancing at the card that merely said, You might find these useful at the House these days, and then opened the lid.

Two small, bean-shaped fabric blobs lay within. Elain murmured, "You put them in your ears, and they block any sound. With Nesta and Cassian living there with you..."

He chuckled, unable to suppress the impulse. "No wonder you didn't want me to open it in front of everyone."

Elain’s mouth twitched into a smile. "Nesta wouldn't appreciate the joke.”

He offered her a smile back. "I wasn't sure if I should give you your present."

He left the rest unspoken. Because her mate was here, sleeping a level up. Because her mate had been in the family room and Azriel had needed to stay by the door the whole time because he couldn't stand the sight of it, the scent of their mating bond, and needed to have the option of leaving if it became too much.

Elain's large brown eyes flickered, well aware of all that. Just as he knew she was well aware of why Azriel so rarely came to family dinners these days.

But tonight, here in the dark and quiet, with no one to see…He pulled the small velvet box from the shadows around him. Opened it for her.

Elain sucked in a soft breath that whispered over his skin. His shadows skittered back at the sound. They'd always been prone to vanish when she was around.

The golden necklace seemed ordinary -- its chain unremarkable, the amulet tiny enough that it could be dismissed as an everyday charm. It was a small, flat rose fashioned of stained glass, designed so that when held to the light, the true depth of the colors would become visible. A thing of secret, lovely beauty.

“It's beautiful," she whispered, lifting it from the box. The golden faelight shone through the little glass facets, setting the charm glowing with hues of red and pink and white. Azriel let his shadows whisk away the box as she said softly, "Put it on me?"

His head went quiet. But he took the necklace, opening the clasp as she exposed her back, sweeping her hair up in one hand to bare her long, creamy neck.

He knew it was wrong, but there he was, sliding the necklace around her. Letting his scarred fingers touch her immaculate skin. Letting them brush the side of her throat, savoring the velvet-soft texture. Elain shivered, and he took a damn long time fastening the clasp.

Azriel's fingers lingered at her nape, atop the first knob of her spine. Slowly, Elain pivoted into his touch. Until his palm lay flat against her neck.

It had never gone this far. They'd exchanged looks, the occasional brush of their fingers, but never this. Never blatant, unrestricted touching.

Wrong -- it was so wrong.

He didn't care.

He needed to know what the skin of her neck tasted like. What those perfect lips tasted like. Her breasts. Her sex. He needed her coming on his tongue --

Azriel's cock strained behind his pants, aching so fiercely he could hardly think. He prayed she didn't peer down. Prayed she didn't understand the shift in his scent.

He had only allowed himself these thoughts in the dead of night. Had only allowed his hand to fist his cock and think about her then, when even his shadows had gone to sleep. How that beautiful face might appear as he entered her, what sounds she'd make.

Elain bit her lower lip, and it took every ounce of Azriel's restraint to keep from putting his own teeth there.

"I should go," Elain said, but made no move to leave.

"Yes," he said, his thumb sweeping in long strokes along the side of her throat.

Her arousal drifted up to him, and his eyes nearly rolled back in his head at the sweet scent. He'd beg on his knees for a chance to taste it. But Azriel just stroked her neck again.

Elain shuddered, drifting closer. So close one deep breath would brush her breasts against his chest. She looked up at him, her face so trusting and hopeful and open that he knew she had no idea that he had done unspeakable things that sullied his hands far beyond their scars.

Such terrible things that it was a sacrilege for his fingers to skin, tainting her with his presence.

But he could have this. This one moment, and maybe a taste, and that would be it.

“Yes" Elain breathed, like she read the decision. Just this taste in the dead of the longest night of the year, where only the Mother might witness them.

Azriel's hand slid up her neck, burying in her thick hair. Tilting her face the way he wanted it. Elain's mouth parted slightly, her eyes scanning his before fluttering shut.

Offer and permission.

He nearly groaned with relief and need as he lowered his head toward hers.

Azriel.

Rhys's voice thundered through him, halting him mere inches from Elain's sweet mouth.

Azriel.

Unrelenting command filled his name, and Azriel looked up.

Rhysand stood atop the staircase. Glowering down at them.

My office. Now.

Rhys vanished, and Azriel was left standing before Elain, who still awaited his kiss. His stomach twisted as he pulled his hand from her hair and stepped back. Forced himself to say, "This was a mistake.”

She opened her eyes, hurt and confusion warring there before she whispered, "I’m sorry."

“You don't-- Don't apologize,” he managed to say. "Never apologize. It's I who should…” He shook his head, unable to stand the bleakness he'd brought to her expression. "Goodnight.”

Azriel winnowed into shadows before she could say anything, appearing at the doors to Rhys's study a heartbeat later. His shadows whispered in his ear that Elain had gone upstairs.

Rhys sat at his desk, furya moonless night across his face. He asked softly, "Are you out of your mind?"

Azriel donned the frozen mask he’d perfected while in his father's dungeon. "I don't know what you're talking about.”

Rhys's power rippled through the room like a dark cloud. "I’m talking about you, about to kiss Elain, in the middle of a hall where anyone could see you," he snarled. "Including her mate."

Azriel stiffened. Let his cold rage rise to the surface, the rage he only ever let Rhysand see, because he knew his brother could match it. "What if the Cauldron was wrong?"

Rhysand blinked. "What of Mor, Az?"

Azriel ignored the question. "The Cauldron chose three sisters. Tell me how it's possible that my two brothers are with two of those sisters, yet the third was given to another." He had never before dared speak the words aloud.

Rhys's face drained of color. "You believe you deserve to be her mate?"

Azriel scowled. "I think Lucien will never be good enough for her, and she has no interest in him, anyway."

"So you'll what?" Rhys's voice was pure ice. "Seduce her away from him?”

Azriel said nothing. He hadn't gotten that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to.

Rhys growled, "Allow me to make one thing very clear. You are to stay away from her."

"You can't order me to do that."

“Oh, I can, and I will. If Lucien finds out you're pursuing her, he has every right to defend their bond as he sees fit. Including invoking the Blood Duel.”

"That's an Autumn Court tradition." The battle to the death was so brutal that it was only enacted in rare cases. Despite being an outsider, Azriel had wanted to invoke it when he’d found Mor all those years ago. Had been ready to challenge both Beron and Eris to Blood Duels and kill them both. Only Mor’s right to claim their heads in vengeance had kept him from doing so.

“Lucien, as Beron's son, has the right to demand it of vou."

"I'll defeat him with little effort." Pure arrogance laced every word, but it was true.

“I know." Rhys's eyes flickered. "And your doing so will rip apart any fragile peace and alliances we have, not only with the Autumn Court but also with the Spring Court and Jurian and Vassa." Rhys bared his teeth. "So you will leave Elain alone. If you need to fuck someone, go to a pleasure hall and pay for it, but stay away from her."

Azriel snarled softly.

"Snarl all you want." Rhys leaned back in his chair. "But if I see you panting after her again, I'll make you regret it."

Rhys had rarely threatened punishment or pulled rank. It stunned Azriel enough that it knocked him from his rage.

Rhys jerked his chin toward the door. "Get out"

Azriel tucked in his wings and left without another word, stalking through the house and onto the front lawn to sit in the frigid starlight. To let the frost in his veins match the air around him.

Until he felt nothing. Was again nothing at all.

Then he flew to the House of Wind, knowing that if he slept in the riverside manor, he'd do something he regretted. He'd been so vigilant about keeping away from Elain as much as possible, and had stayed up here to avoid her, and tonight...tonight had proved he 'd been right to do so.

He aimed for the training pit, giving in to the need to work off the temptation, the rage and frustration and writhing need.

Chapter 59 - Post Solstice

He’d been replaced in training by a stone-faced Azriel, who was more aloof than usual and wouldn’t even give her a smile.

#masterpost

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