dominatingxit

[dominatingxit]

Hardcore BDSM and boredom

There is often talk about taking being used, abused, taking pain, degradation, objectification, methods of all of this. There is talk of being kept in long term bondage, being captive, being an object, like a table, the excitement of… All of that. But I think there is one thing that is often overlooked. The boredom. Being in long term bondage, even when in a stress position or semi stress position, is about taking the pain the discomfort, but there is also the boredom. The same kind of thing as solitary confinement in prisons. Well, there is also another thing that people do not talk about in this, and that is logistics, how do you water, feed, remove waste in a longer term kind of scenario. It is not just use rubber and restraints and add time. There can be feeding tubes, catheters… Well, it depends on how deep down the rabbit hole one actually want to go. And that is the hard part. Go beyond the fantasy. Get into the boredom. Get your mind truly messed with, being exposed to a accelerated day/night kind of cycle with artificial lights tricking your mind to think that you have spent a week in bondage, while it has been a weekend. Boring can be interesting indeed.

[dominatingxit]

Over elaborate or simple?

When it comes to bondage, and predicament bondage in particular I find great satisfaction in doing elaborate, complicated often time consuming setups, where a great part of what makes it satisfying is the buildup of the set up. And if it is predicament or longer term bondage there are may little details that need to be just right to make it sustainable for a longer period of time.

But.

That being said. There is something very appealing in something very simple. That has great effect. That is essentially inescapable with very simple means. It can be a quick setup. It can be just that the tools are effective. Being handcuffed to a radiator is arguably very efficient and rather inescapable. Incorporating piercings in the bondage can have a pretty thin thread keeping someone captive - or the price for freedom is a ripped piercing… Well, one can do some harder core temporary piercings that cannot be ripped. Much like you would do for body suspension.

An idea that has been floating around my head lately is a pretty simple, but effective idea. Also not the most comfortable. So have a post with a block that is fastened at just the right height, right in front of the subjects mouth. Tongue out, needle of a decent gauge through the tongue and into the block. Hands cuffed behind the back. That will hold most people captive till you let them go. Adding to the setup, making it less simple, but also more interesting. A collar to help hold the neck close to the block and perhaps even be able to support the subject some. Really high heels, making the ramp up of intensity a lot steeper. Also. Lifting the arms by the wrist into a nice strappado would increase the intensity very quickly. Other toys and actions can be added, plugs that vibrate or inflate, impact by floggers or canes or…

How long would you last in that kind of scenario. What would happen to your brain as you are left in the pitch dark and pain?

[dominatingxit]

I love so many things about this... The objectification, the dehumanization, the very obvious use. But it also makes me thnk about what is going on behind the scenes in this relation. Being kept in a chastity belt, sure. Having an interesting evening with bondage, collar gag and blindfold, absolutely. But what happened before this. Look at the dress. Is this the conclusion of date night? Well. I am down for some date night.

[dominatingxit]

As much as I really do not like the aesthetics of this. That blanket is really hideous. There is something appealing with the cable in use. And the cane soaking up water to get more flexible for more impact.

[dominatingxit]

Like a vampire.

Entering a potential slaves home for the first time. I have done this in different iterations. Some are more deliberate. Let me tell you about the formula for a deliberate approach.

I arrive at your door, you know I am coming, you are on your kneeling. Palms and forehead to the floor. If we come in together from a date the first thing for you is to kneel.

I enter and put on some black nitrate disposable gloves, like a crime scene investigator. I tell you "stay" and I start going through your home, the level of detail depends on the size. A small flat gets very thoroughly examined, a large house less so.

I find faults in my inspection and come back to answer questions. For instance "why are there dirty dishes in the sink?" "oh you were in a hurry?" "When is the last time you cleaned your bathtub it is filthy", etc. I do look for things that can be used in creative ways. For bondage, for impact, for humiliation. "The railing is good to tie to", "This cutting board makes a great paddle" "I bet this crucifix will fit in the ass"

I do try to find the sex toys, the vibrator by the bed, the box of various plugs, cuffs and whips etc. I line all the toys I can find up and finally I get you. "Are this all your toys?"

There may be more. Once we have all of them all lined up I name them. "little ruby plug" and "big ruby plug" for the gemmed buttplugs, generic things such as "dildo 1, 2, 3 and 4 " and "plug 1, 2 and 3" but also whatever comes to mind "crab killer", "agony" etc.

Next up is a inspection of body. Like an inspection of livestock or horse trading. For female slaves checking their wetness by slightly inserting two gloved fingers. Sniffing them. Tasting them with the tip of my tongue. And showing them into the mouth. For male slaves same only inserting into their asscunts, and I do not taste ass.

Usually this is the time for a serious conversation about boundaries or lack of boundaries to come. The preferences vs limitations. It is about conversation and focus. And mapping out. Depending on circumstances, usually I deliberately do not engage in any physical activities on this first mapping session.

Would you welcome me into your home? I am like a vampire. I do require consent. Only to get consent to not require it any more.

[dominatingxit]

I wonder. Would you have regrets. Or. No regrets?

I know I would have none. And just keep going.

[dominatingxit]

I came across this and remembered I had saved these pictures. I find this thing really fascinating. Chastity devices. Specially plugged ones. The weights make this unique. And also obviously is making the wearer here quite happy. It is a nice setup. A longish skirt and a jacket and nobody would (really) know in public.

[dominatingxit]

Awaiting something... Interesting. I really like the focus on the pear of anguish. It is such a nice and effective little device.

[dominatingxit]

SSC and RACK

Safe Sane Consensual (SSC) and Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK) are two approaches to BDSM that cover a lot of the same ground. However I feel that SSC falls a little short of covering the depths of depravity that I often seek out. I feel that SSC is a little soft, I mean it does not have to be, but it feels like;

"Oh, my daddy put some chained clamps on my nipples and spanked me, but only twice on each ass cheek as I requested. Then he put a piece of duct tape on my mouth, and fucked me, it was so hot".

While RACK, well, my version which is more RACNCK being consensual non consensual kink can in its extremes more be;

"Oh my owner caned the shit out of my ass, I love the velts and hotness of my ass. He then proceeded to tie up my breast paddled them nice and dark before pushing skewers through them. I was a bloody mess drooling from my dildo gag as he raped my ass in the gynecologist chair I was tied up in."

Well, silly examples, but you get the idea. SSC lacks the range of RACK.

A larger rope community I know had a experienced, trusted and known rigger do a scene with a girl. It was all good and after they were having a cup of tea. As she was leaving he gave her a hug. That was not something she had explicitly consented to so she wanted him black listed in the community, etc. SSC indeed.

To me that is a little insane. And also part of the reason why I do not want to actively participate in communities like that. I just tend to skirt at the outsides of them, interacting, but not joining in. Mostly because of drama.

I like quite intense things. I like the CNC everything goes, but just because everything goes does not mean that everything needs to happen. The range is there. Preferences are after all preferences. To each his or her or its own.

[dominatingxit]

This drawing is what I currently use as my blog avatar. It is drawn by Simon Benson.

Generally when it comes to drawings and photos in general I like it to reference the real me. The things I have done and the things I could do.

This drawing is a bit of a fantasy. It does flow into the river of reality, but is still a fantasy. I like the setup. It is more involved than what I have done. It is a good setup for longterm bondage. The subject in a chastity device with a catheter going to a bag keeping things clean. It is being fed by liquids, I can only imagine something somewhat nutritious that can sustain the long term bondage. The subject has a rubber bulb pump that will feed it. The aesthetic of it all really speaks to me. The rubber, the chastity device, the metal restraints.

[dominatingxit]

Triggering fight or flight. Have you ever felt that? The panic setting in? That very primal response that makes you loose control of your thoughts. I have seen it manifest so many times, and in various ways.

With serious immobilizing bondage it turns into panic and struggle against the bonds. And it can vocalize, which can be impractical depending on surroundings. Gags like ball gags can only do so much. More serious gagging can lead to even more panic.

How do I deal with it? As it manifests in many various incarnations my response and strategy gets to be varied as well. It very much depends on the relation and the depth of connection. Or lack of connection.

With serious immobilizing bondage with some good gagging I can enjoy watching it riding it out. Listening to the nasal panicking sounds. Watching the struggle against the bonds. Bonus if the bonds hold in too long/large plugs that get some extra action and tension. Or. Is this the time some light physical touch, some encouraging words whispered into an ear. Blindfolds removed. Letting it settle. Calm.

The response can come without too much physical aspects, such as bondage. I took a girl home from a first date. I took her into my bedroom. It was a all blacked out deal. Walls, floor, ceiling all painted black. I had her stand spread eagle up against the wall. I pulled up her skirt and slapped her ass. Pretty hard, but just with my hand. And that sent her spiraling. I dealt with that by holding her tight. Feel physical closeness. And let her calm. I did this as I did want to go deeper and did not want to go too deep down the rabbit hole the first date.

[dominatingxit]

TPE - Total Power Exchange, what does it mean to me? Well, total is total and I do think it goes in hand with CNC - Consensual Non-Consensual. It is a point where the consent is given to anything. Anything goes. There are no limits imposed by the slave. It is all up to the dominant. This can lead to quite wide range of outcomes.

It can be anything from being kept locked in a cage in the basement to a on the surface completely normal relationship with varying degrees of kink. If we go deeper into CNC, it often gets manifested as rape not-rape. To me rape like that is obviously not rape, but it is the very physical aspects of rape. Which can be interesting.