donereallybadly

[donereallybadly]

Raising hopes

Putting your best foot forward, travelling to your interviews a then being pipped at the post by a better candidate.

“You can both easily do the job” doesn’t really help either.

Must take the advice of others who have encouraged more cynicism.

[donereallybadly]

Spaving

‘Spaving,’ the art of opening your wallet with the illusion of snapping it shut. It’s that magical moment when you convince yourself that spending an extra $10 on things you’ll never use is a brilliant move because, hey, free shipping! And who can resist the siren call of “Buy 50, get one free” deals? Especially when that freebie is the least expensive item you never wanted in the first place.

It’s the marketing ploy that whispers sweet nothings about savings into your ear, while your bank account weeps silently in the corner. It’s the financial equivalent of running on a treadmill – you’re putting in a lot of effort to go absolutely nowhere, financially speaking.

[donereallybadly]

Selfish road crossings

Someone very smart once said to me “Be the behaviours you want to see in the world”.

Wise words.

And these should be heeded by the swathes of morons who step into traffic without waiting for the green light to walk and then act swear at the vehicles that had to break to save themselves from running them over.

Sure we have all stepped into the road by mistake. Just when you do hold your hands up and apologise. Don’t blame the drivers who were clearly in the right.

[donereallybadly]

Clients not paying invoices

Let’s talk about that special breed of client. You know the ones. They waltz in with demands as high as Everest and a budget that wouldn’t cover a cup of coffee. They’ll change the scope of the project more often than a chameleon on a disco floor, and when it’s time to settle up, suddenly they’re more elusive than Bigfoot.

So, a friend—bless their cotton socks—decided to play nice with one of these mythical creatures. They worked hard, poured their soul into the project, only to have this client morph into a ghost when the invoice appeared. Spooky, right?

And then, get this, they have the audacity to ask for the deliverables with a promise to pay later. Because, sure, we all just love working on the honor system, don’t we? It’s not like we have bills to pay or anything. We’re all just here for the fun of it, right?

Who falls for that, you ask? Well, certainly not our friend. They know better than to trust a handshake from the Invisible Man. If you agree to a scope, you pay for the scope. It’s not rocket science; it’s just plain old common sense.

But hey, let’s all give a round of applause for those clients who think the world is their free buffet. Bravo, truly. You’re the real pr*cks of the business world.

[donereallybadly]

I do give a duck!

Oh, autocorrect, you digital dictator of decency, how you quack me up. You turn my f-bombs into “duck,” my damns into “darns,” and my heated messages into a farmyard chat. Thanks to you, my rage texts are less “angry human” and more “disgruntled duck.” I’d tell you to go to he’ll, but you’d probably send me to “heck” instead.

So annoying, this has been turned into an original Done Really Badly design and available now in the shop.

[donereallybadly]

Locking up the detergent

In the midst of our cost-of-living crisis, we’ve stumbled upon a revelation so profound it shakes the very fabric of society: the locking away of the sacred washing detergent. It’s a travesty, I tell you! Because, you know, it’s not like we’re dealing with a mere financial hiccup; it’s a full-blown cultural apocalypse!

Let’s put this into perspective, shall we? For the price of less than two gourmet Big Macs with a side of those oh-so-fancy fries, you could wash your clothes 33 times! That’s right, folks, we’re living in an era where clean socks are apparently more valuable than fast food.

And sure, we’re totally aware that some families might be having a tough time making ends meet. But hey, look on the bright side – the UK is now the proud owner of more food banks than McDonald’s outlets in 2024. That’s got to count for something, right?

Plus, there’s a silver lining! This very store that’s fortifying its laundry aisle like it’s a gold reserve is also a beacon of employment opportunities. They’re practically begging for workers, and yet, it’s as if there’s an invisible force field keeping applicants away. How peculiar!

If this post has ruffled your feathers, stirred your pot, or otherwise mildly inconvenienced your day, please direct all your heartfelt grievances to Meh@Whatever.com. Rest assured, we’ll give your feedback the undivided attention it so richly deserves – right after we finish counting our detergent pods.

[donereallybadly]

privacy popups

“We value your privacy”

Oh, absolutely, we cherish your privacy! It’s right up there with our love for Monday mornings and internet ads. You see, we had to take action because some data-hungry rascals got a little too creative with public opinion. And then, the do-gooders came in hot—literally—and pushed us to the other side of the spectrum.

The internet, dear friends, is a place of mystery and wonder, where not everything hides behind the cloak of anonymity. Shocking, we know.

And let’s be real, who doesn’t want a one-size-fits-all policy from their beloved ISP? It’s like a warm, fuzzy blanket that lets us snuggle up with The Daily Hate in peace, minus the infuriating pop-up interruptions.

But why go for simplicity when you can have complexity? It’s all thanks to those job-securing morons who navigate through the maze of illogical processes to ensure our online journey feels like a hike through quicksand.

And hey, don’t forget to thank us for tucking away that pesky legal mumbo jumbo at the bottom of the page. We’re all about subtlety here. And those pop-ups of ours? They’re not distractions; they’re invitations to a shopping spree!