dontaskme4apic

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I remember looking out across the snow as a kid. It was so beautiful with the sun shining down on it making it sparkle.

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“Verily, we are from God and to Him we shall return.”

— The Holy Koran

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This movie was super hilarious!

Superbad (2007) by Greg Mottola

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My friend posted this on Facebook.

I began tapping, "Honestly, it makes me feel worse. I feel like I'm not doing enough, then someone says they're proud of me? So I feel like they aren't seeing the reality of who I am and now I'm being deceptive. Because who would be proud of me." Then I took a second to reread it, as I do because GoD FoRBiD SoMEoNe tHInK i DOn'T KnOW WhErE tO pLAcE A COMMA oR WhaTEvER tHe FUCK, and almost instantly my eyes swelled with tears. How can I be so damn hard on myself. Nothing is ever good enough. Why am I so mean? BUT, the bright side of this is that I'm recognising it. I am aware of it and I don't fucking like it. I don't like it and I GENUINELY (for the first fucking time ever, I think) don't want that for myself and I'm kinda mad at myself for being such a fucking asshole. People always say, "You wouldn't let someone talk to your friends like that." I'm always like, "fuck ooooffff. I'm helping myself do better." (Which makes absolutely no sense) I want better.

And at the end of this I realise, I'm being hard on myself for being hard on myself...

I feel inherently not good enough.

I feel like, "just fucking love yourself goddammit!"

But if I do that then I have to accept myself as good enough but I'm not so I would be living a lie.

raw cold hard truth.

I'm not saying that it's just gunna be this way forever. I'm working really hard on myself. This is just the "assignment"? I've been given at this time (not a literal assignment but a universal assignment, one that the universe or whatever you believe or don't believe gives to everyone we just choose to complete it or not). This turned into much more than I thought it would. If you are still with me, why? Why? But ALSO thank you. Maybe I'm as strange as I feel. Maybe I'm not. Maybe you are as strange as I am. Whatever it is, I hope maybe that this helped someone. Even if it's looking at this like, "wow I'm so much better off than I thought." Or "damn, I feel that." Whatever man... Fuck okay I'm done bye.

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Trespassers

The stinging echos 

of memories I have tried so hard,

to eject.

into the abyss 

As hard as I try those

noises 

images 

smells linger

and I am stuck.

In that moment

I am there, a wallflower

helpless 

was it taken?  or did I give it way?

the ground is shaking from the pillage of my temple

forgive us our trespassers

where are you?

as we forgive those who trespass against us

where?! 

lead him not into temptation, but deliver him from evil.

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He

I become so lost in him. 

Every inch of him was mine,

And I wanted to enjoy him while I could.

How his body made me 

quiver

His skin.

So soft and warm.

Every cell of him was mine and 

In these moments,

I think of 

nothing.

Because there was nothing better

To memorize every outline

Of every

curve.

Tracing his stomach,

Kept my heart racing

Every second of the time we

Spent together

To caress the

Curves of

Every

muscle.

So perfectly placed on his frame,

To feel him on my body to taste

Him in my mouth to squeeze him 

inside me

Knowing that in these moments

He is mine, 

and no one else’s

My heart breaks as my inner voice says,

“…for now.”

Tha sadness turns

To desparation,

The desparation

Turns 

To

determination

A

Determination filled wanting

To seize these moments.

To capture them in time.

To hold them in my mind

So that I am able to recap

The way his skin turned me

Into a thirsty zombie 

Programmed to 

Relentlessly lust after

his flesh.

He helped me resurface

Things about myself I

Had long forgotten

and that is as far as my love goes for him.

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2008: wow I was so stupid last year

2009: wow I was so stupid last year

2010: wow I was so stupid last year

2011: wow I was so stupid last year

2012: wow I was so stupid last year

2013: wow I was so stupid last year

2014: wow I was so stupid last year

2015: wow I was so stupid last year

2016: wow I was so stupid last year

2017: wow I was so stupid last year

2018: wow I was so stupid last year

to be continued

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Lykke Li - No Rest For The Wicked

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can’t help falling in love on a kalimba

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IT’S GONNA TAKE A LOT TO TAKE ME AWAY FROM YOUUUUU

THERE’S NOTHING THAT A HUNDRED MEN OR MORE COULD EVER DOOOOO

I BLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN AAAAAFRICA

GONNA TAKE SOME TIME TO DO THE THINGS WE NEVER HaAAaAaAAAAAAD

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how does this stock photo make you feel

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So good I had to share! Check out all the items I'm loving on @Poshmarkapp from @lori-brockmeyer #poshmark #fashion #style #shopmycloset #forever21 #yansifugel #kutfromthekloth: https://bnc.lt/focc/ioVHfrw7qN