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bad comic

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image found while on google images ©

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based

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happy pride month to the fuck tree I guess

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TO THE PATRONS OF THIS THEATER, I APOLOGIZE FOR INTERRUPTING YOUR SCREENING OF INLAND EMPIRE BUT I DO NEED YOUR HELP WITH SOMETHING. THERE IS A MAN IN ROW E SEAT 7 WHO HAS BEEN GOOGLING "INLAND EMPIRE EXPLAINED" ON HIS PHONE WITH FULL BRIGHTNESS ON, DISTURBING OTHER VIEWERS IN HIS VICINITY. HE HAS NO LOVE FOR FILM AND JUDGING BY WHAT HE HAS GOOGLED HE THINKS THAT ALL MOVIES ARE PUZZLES THAT HE HAS TO SOLVE LIKE THIS IS LOST OR SOME SHIT. I UNDERSTAND THIS IS AN UNUSUAL REQUEST, BUT I WANT YOU TO REMOVE THIS MAN FROM THE THEATER AND POSSIBLY KILL HIM. WHEN HE IS GONE, YOUR SCREENING WILL RESUME. YOUR PAL, DAVID LYNCH

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every time giorno opens his fucking mouth he says shit like this

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this was the first and only time I’ve ever died in a yakuza game and I laughed so hard I almost blacked out

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we did the best we could to extract the perfect columbo reaction gif, and here it is - been wanting to make this for bloody weeks

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I got another photo with Giancarlo Esposito and the conversation went like this

me: hey 10 years ago I got a photo of you pretending a banana was a gun, do you remember me?

Giancarlo: of course I remember you

me: shit you’re a good actor

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i got this photo with gus from breaking bad and the conversation went like this

me: “hey can you pretend this banana I found outside is a gun?” him: “it is a gun” me: “shit you’re a good actor”

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My favorite Soviet era joke: Three Russian men were sent by their company to attend a convention in Moscow. All 3 shared a hotel room. Two of them cracked open a bottle of vodka, but the third just wanted to sleep. The two drinkers got louder and louder as the bottle emptied, telling each other political jokes. The third was kept awake, and got angry.

He went outside for a smoke. On his way back to his room, he stopped at the desk and said 'Please send a pot of tea up to room 23.'

The two drunks were still being loud. The third man went in, looked at them, then leaned over to the light socket 'Comrade Major, please send some tea to my room.'

The other men thought this was hilarious...until there was a knock on the door, and a waiter with a pot of tea. They became completely silent, and the third man fell asleep.

When he woke up in the morning, he was alone. He went to the front desk, and asked where his roommates were.

'Well, the KGB came this morning and took them away.'

The man was horrified 'why did they spare me?!?'

"The comrade major thought the tea joke was very funny."

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by @beetlemoses

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