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dealing with the worst case scenario
your condom breaks
you feel a lump on your breast
your friends are ignoring you
you’re stranded on an island 
you got rejected by a crush
you get into a car accident
you got stung by a bee/wasp
you got fired from your job
you’re in an earthquake
your tattoo gets infected
your house is on fire
you’re lost in the woods
you get arrested abroad
you get robbed
your partner cheated on you
you’re on a ship that’s sinking
you fall into ice
you’re stuck in an elevator
you hit a deer with your car
you have food poisoning
your pet passed away
you fall off of a horse
you or your friend has alcohol poisoning
you have toxic shock syndrome
your house has a gas leak
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I wanna know what people assume about me because of my tumblr.
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Conversation
James: Sirius Orion Black! What on earth is that dick doing in your mouth?
Sirius: Mmmm mf mmmph erggh.
James: What do you mean you have no idea how it got there? Do you even know where that’s been!? Spit it out, right now!
Remus: Oh my god.
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Dude, you good?? It says that you can't receive messages so I'm just worried
Hey, yeah it just because tumblr is an ass. If anyone needs to pm me, I'm available at im-so-gay-dude or wiccan-witchy-nonsense
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the hotel has an on demand section called “mood” & these are the moods
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Chris+Chris = Chris ²
I went to fool around on face morph but instead I unlocked a conspiracy 
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hey if ur reading this and ur in a bad spot mentally or anything i hope u feel better soon and have a good day
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i’m just casually going to go on a follow spree for my other fandoms
like / reblog this if you frequently post;
-markiplier
-jacksepticeye
-crankgameplays
-pewdiepie
-peebles
-thomas sanders
-connor franta
-jacksfilms
-kickthepj
-natewantstobattle
-robertidk
-wiishu
-harry potter
-twenty one pilots
-tokyo ghoul
-ouran high school host club
-owari no seraph (seraph of the end)
-bo burnham
-lyrics
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Okay, but French-speaking Draco:
Draco being raised by a mainly french-speaking Narcissa
Maman instead of Mom/Mommy
Lucius having to slowly transition Draco to speak predominantly English as he gets older
Draco getting a headache when he’s immersed in English for too long
Draco feeling like he’s missing a limb when he has nobody to speak in French with at Hogwarts
Him writing all his letters to his mom in French
Draco eventually realizing that most of the house elves are multilingual and him sneaking down to the kitchens to chat with them 
Draco teaching everyone in his House how to curse in French
Slytherins blurting out obscene phrases in French during frustrating classes
Not having to lock his journal because none of his housemates speak French
Draco getting frustrated and cursing in French beneath his breath
Harry staring on, flabbergasted, as Draco stomps past him, mouth going a mile a minute, spitting out beautiful, flowing words so rapidly and harshly
Draco being one of the best duelers of the school because he duels in French so his opponents can’t understand him and can’t counteract properly
He and Harry facing off because Harry duels in Parseltongue
When he and Harry eventually get together, he teaches Harry small phrases
Draco reverting to French in bed because it comes as first nature to him
Harry loving the filthy spew of typically elegant words coming from Draco’s mouth
Everyone knowing which hallways/broom closets/classrooms/dorm rooms to avoid due to the cries of Parseltongue and French
Draco getting mad at Harry and cursing him out in French
Firecalling his maman and ranting to her about everything, feeling relieved and comforted by the familiarity of his language and his mother
Draco’s heart fluttering when Harry sheepishly, and with an awful accent, mumbles to him, “je t’aime”
Him kissing Harry and hissing “I love you” in Parseltongue (he didn’t mention it had taken him months of research to find the correct translation and pronunciation)
Draco raising his kids to speak French and being their papa
Just, French-speaking Draco. 
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Concept: a dragon that tries to sleep on top of it’s friends and family every night bc they’re it’s greatest treasure
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Do y'all smell white privilege too?
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What are your headcanons about me?
Just curious. 
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Wow just wow.
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Reblog this if its okay for your followers to introduce themselves to you.
Just come to my ask box and tell me stuff about yourself. Your pets. Your favorite music. What you had for breakfast this morning. Literally anything you want, I love making new friends
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Pineapple🍍: We never talk but I care about you!Awe thank you. We totally could talk !
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A picture of Thomas using the fact that twitter now allows 280 characters to the best of his ability
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You know how the Sides get badly affected if they stay in another Side’s room for too long?
Imagine late night conversations through the cracks under their bedroom doors because that really wouldn’t affect them.
“Hey Princey”
“Virgil?”
“Shrek 5 comes out in-”
“You woke me up at 4 AM to discuss SHREK 5?”
“Logan didn’t want to talk to me.”
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