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RIP Peter Ware Higgs 

(29 May 1929 – 8 April 2024)

The man who theorised the existence of The Higgs Boson has sadly passed. At least he lived long enough to see his theory vindicated.

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Musings On The Monkey Nut!

Yes folks, I'm as surprised as you that Tonka hasn't done anything dateless for a while.

Back to The Monkey Nut. Aside from being more 'bitey' than normal, they've dropped two absolute clangers recently.

Tonka and TMN have been trying out various local activities, (book groups, craft clubs, etc) and while looking online on what was available, Tonka pointed out "I can't believe it, there's a local Naturist group!" and TMN replied "You mean there is a group of Nakies? In Doncaster?" Nakies, I ask you.

Also, fyi, I've recently had a smol pressure sore that had to be dressed at the GP surgery, and after it was sorted, TMN mentioned "At least we won't have to keep going back to the Docs now that Daddy's legion has healed!" Cue five mins of confusion as we work out that out wonderful Hexadecimal Offspring thought that the word legion, and lesion were homonyms.

Bless!

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Happy Saint David's Day Folks!

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Is that an Auton Armchair?

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Quietly to self: "I hate myself for laughing, and this website hellsite for producing it."

Louder to everyone else: "MORE PLEASE!"

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If the Original Trilogy came out now, this would be online within half a nanosecond of the end titles playing at the World Premier.

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i just realized how absolutely earth shatteringly horny the internet at large would be for darth vader if the original trilogy came out right now

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It's quite obviously Weird Al. Why is anyone surprised by anything He does?

I didn’t expect that…

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Keanu Thieves (via mushroombirdornaments)

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Whoops, should have posted here first.

Yesteryear In The City Of York!

The end of an era:-

After moving to York in the early Eighties, I saw many of Berwick Kaler's Pantos, and when The Monkey Nut was old enough, we took them too.

Always witty, inciteful, slightly naughty, but never crude.

As an example, a typical interaction between Berwick Kaler's Dame, and Martin Barrass as the Dame's Son, bear in mind both have broad North East accents.

Dame's Son: "But mam, I'm old enough to shave. And go out wi' lasses at neet (night)"

Dame: "Oh Son, ya know nowt aboot (about) lasses."

Dame's Son: (as if he had a bright idea) "I know all aboot you Mam!"

Dame: (looking knowingly at the audience) "Like I said Son, ya know nowt aboot lasses!"

You and your team will be missed, Berwick.

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Just Pointing Out That This Advert Was Made When Skeletor And He-Man's Uncle/Nephew Relationship Was Just A Google Search Away!

Especially since Skeletor, being He-Man's Uncle, is taking the 'follower role' in the dance.

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Conversations With The Cave Troll!

We went shopping the other day, (that is to say Tonka and The Monkey Nut went shopping while I read in the car) and they bought me, among other things, a three pack of Stitch, Angel, and Leroy plushies.

There is a teeny-tiny, teeny-tiny flaw in the packaging. The first person to spot it, wins a Dream House, as in, within a year, I guarantee you will dream of a house.

Answers on a post card to etc etc...

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Tales From Tonka! Again! Surprisingly!

We are currently rewatching Babylon 5, and when we got to episode 4, and Dr Franklin mentioned The Dilgar War, and Tonka, bless her little hard of hearing heart thought he was talking about The Dildo War.

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Tales From Tonka! Two For One!

The Monkey Nut is currently 'redecorating' a lizard figurine, and we were discussing how to stop the paint being worn off again, when Tonka suggested 'Glossing The Gecko', her words.

Also we reached the 'Eye Of Pincosta' episode of Tangled The Series, and as Rapunzel fought Malice Marauder, I thought, "female, short, and perpetually angry, who does that remind me of?"

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City Of Doncaster Diaries!

We have two elderly neighbours who are not quite all there.

One is a sweet old lady (hereafter known as Mrs L) who I am convinced is playing up to the 'Daft Old Biddy' stereotype more than a bit, the other is a loud-mouthed, opinionated, moron (hereafter known as Al, short for Al Coholic, because he obviously is, and no amount of 'sneaking' his empties into other folks recycling is fooling anyone).

I refer to Mrs L as such because her surname begins with 'L' and she is the living embodiment of 'Mrs Lopsided' from Ealing's original version of 'The Ladykillers', bless her. Anyway, we pop round occasionally to make sure she's OK, and because her house is a bit draughty, we got her a draught excluder that looked like a Fox for crimbo. At weekend we took her some shopping, and some bickies that The Monkey Nut had baked, and we noticed the draught excluder on the sofa next to her, covered in a shawl. When asked, she said, and I quote, because those words are burned onto my brain, "Oh the poor dear looked so cold, and I thought they needed warming!"

I swear she's winding us up at least half the time, but I can't prove it.

For context, large parts of the UK are flooding right now, lots of folk homeless, without power, etc, various rivers are so overflown, that you can only tell where the banks are, because of the trees that normally line said banks. Well, Al, our local loud mouth was proclaiming to all within earshot how only his mighty intellect could solve all the flooding. Dig a really big hole, and have all the flood water flow into it. Don't laugh, it's cruel to mock the afflicted.

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Conversations With The Cave Troll!

We were watching London's New Year celebrations, in the middle of a Rick Astley concert, and in addition to the usual fireworks, there was this amazing illuminated drone display.

I started wondering at the amount of planning and coordinating of computer systems it must take to control those drones, and I thought, wherever Alan Turing is, I hope He can look down, think "That was built on my work" and feel a small glow of pride.

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Conversations With The Cave Troll

In exactly one year's time, Christmas will be over!

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Conversations With The Cave Troll!

You know what really gets on my goat? Disney's double standards!

I mean, if anyone else goes within a hundred miles of their Intellectual Property, Disney go into collective apoplexy, but they feel free rip other folk off.

Case in point, their remake of the Barbie Nutcracker. Now to be fair, the story is an old one, so redoing it is kind of allowable, but the fact they are ripping off the music used in the Barbie version.