drunkforestnymph - Tumblr blog

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Egg mass of a conical moonsnail illuminated by the moon. ©Kandy Curran

[drunkforestnymph]

by bradley_images

[drunkforestnymph]

3 core beliefs of be kind be weird eat berries

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Ranunculus by greenandgorgeousflowers

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Budding birches by marie_skoven

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Sports bra is lingerie if you're good enough at gender

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[drunkforestnymph]

[drunkforestnymph]

taylor swift fans heads would explode if they encountered the head explosion monster

[drunkforestnymph]

when you censor yourself like this -> *** on my dash i respect your right to privacy but I AM trying to decipher it like we're playing hangman or something. is there an o in there give me something to work with

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dating simulator where it starts normal but it slowly becomes clear that all of the romanceable characters are attempting to cover up an extremely specific murder they committed a year ago before you arrived

[drunkforestnymph]

i am about to bestow upon you the secret butter technique. i am sorry, but it is french. i am sorry again, this only works with cow butter. i am certain plant based butters wouldn’t work, and alternative animal butters may or may not work

has this ever been you: you have a nicely steamed vegetable, or maybe you want to make the best butter noodles, but you know that if you put butter on those it’ll just melt and you end with kind of greasy noodles or vegetables? don’t you wish it was instead a luscious buttery glaze?

introducing: beurre monté

you will take a small sauce pan, and begin heating it with 1-2 tablespoons of water (use very little water) and bring it to a hard simmer or boil

turn the heat down slightly, and add Butter. how much? however much you dare. (start with 3-4 tablespoons and go from there)

you are going to either whisk Aggressively or you can pick up the saucepan, still holding it over the heat, and swirl aggressively so the butter is skating around the sides of the pan

done correctly, you will have liquid butter that is still emulsified. you have made Butter Sauce. season it with a little salt, and toss whatever you want in it.

if you’re butter splits, i’m sorry. you didn’t agitate it enough to maintain the emulsion, and now you have melted butter.

you can use this knowledge to make other sauces by swapping out the water for another liquid. white wine becomes beurre blanc. red wine is beurre rogue.

you want to CUM? sweat minced shallot in a tiny bit of butter, add white wine and cook it out until it’s reduced by about half. then whisk butter in hard. a few flecks of minced thyme or fennel frond stirred thru, and you eat that with a nice seared fish? or scallop? or even shrimp? wow. you will Nut

your boxed mac and cheese game can also be elevated by cooking your pasta and making a beurre monté first, tossing your pasta in that and adding the cheese packet. wow. hey; you’ll cum

go forth now with this butter secret

[drunkforestnymph]

No one makes Galadriel spooky enough. Like yea I get she’s the most beautiful elven maiden the world has ever seen but she’s also downright unsettling.

I bet she fuckin stares at people without blinking for like a solid five minutes and then when you finally ask her what fuck is up she tells you how you’re gonna die.

[drunkforestnymph]

I noticed you haven’t been online in 10 hours, is therapy finally working?

this websites hate mail game is ruthless

[drunkforestnymph]

by Alexander Pisarev

[drunkforestnymph]

For 2 days in a row I have seen this little guy removing leaves from my plant and eating them until he passes out. He's missing an ear, so he may be self-medicating his PTSD, but still, I think it's time for an intervention.

I'll let him sleep this time, but when he wakes up, we'll have a serious talk.

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I loved when AI art could never be anything but AI art. the dreams of a computer. now it's all boobs and photorealistic women doing bad kink. but I remember you. I miss you. I love you, Secret Horses.