dstnyher

[dstnyher]

Unwrap the worst things you’ve ever done, put it in the table. Watch me hold them to the light and not even flinch. I will not abandon you. You are both my chaos and peace. You send rain on my yard to make my flowers bloom.

[dstnyher]

I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions to you. You are like a journey that I’m willingly excited to experience, the fleeting joy of listening to your music while gazing to the window, daydreaming of what could’ve happen.

[dstnyher]

Most idiots will tell you to heal, to process, to do some therapeutic bullshit to make the pain stop.

They don't understand that pain is pure voltage. Raw fucking current that most people try to ground when they should be channeling it.

Your telomeres literally start extending when you convert that kind of suffering into rocket fuel.

It's basic thermodynamics - that much emotional energy has to go somewhere. Either it burns you or it propels you.

Unavailable love is basically evolutionary pressure in disguise. Forces you to level up or die trying.

That pain isn't asking to be healed. It's asking to be weaponized. Every time your chest feels like it's caving in, that's just your spirit doing forced reps with weight it's never handled before.

Bystanders will tell you to move on. To find someone else. Pure cope. They don't understand that some loves aren't meant to be fulfilled - they're meant to be transformed. Emotional alchemy. Turn that lead in your chest into fucking plutonium.

Stop trying to numb the pain. Heartbreak isn't your enemy - it's just energy looking for somewhere to detonate.

Your only job is to make sure when that explosion happens, it launches you into orbit instead of leaving you in pieces.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

[dstnyher]

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[dstnyher]

A Self Reminder to love yourself

1. Your biggest enemy is yourself. That enemy is the one who makes you overthink, develop a low self-esteem, make you emotionally unstable and give you headache. Love yourself from the inside first before you expect love from the outside.

2. You are not in a relationship with a man until you both clearly state it. Don't get carried away by the idea of love with a man simply because he spends time with you or treats you special

3. If you are in a relationship or marriage, demanding your man to spend time with you will not make him do so. A man willingly spends time with you because you give him peace and he enjoys your company. Attract him the same way you peacefully and warmly attracted him when he was pursuing you

4. Mr. Right is the man who offers a conducive environment for you to be the best you. Choose your environment well

5. Your husband will never find you if you keep fooling around with other women's husbands

6. Mr. Right can also hurt you. The difference is that Mr. Right hurts when he hurts you, he apologises, owns up to his short comings and makes effort to love you better. Love is a learning process

7. Silent treatment will not solve anything. If your man hurts you, learn to speak your hurt and teach him to love you better. The best couples have mastered the art of conflict resolution

8. Most men don't mind being corrected. What they do mind is the tone with which you correct them. The world has been harsh towards women for years, but tone down your defensive mode and learn to communicate effectively with respect and love. You two don't have to fight and argue to look like you are addressing issues

9. A man who is not serious about you will avoid accountability, will operate in grey areas and will hide you. You will never go far with him. Serious men like being kept accountable, they take pride in what they commit to and are not afraid of responsibilities

10. Getting pregnant for a man will not make him serious about you. Men are serious about a woman because they have a personal vision that includes her

11. If you are not a woman who knows herself, relationships and marriages will bring you drama. Your self awareness is your personal responsibility

12. If you do know yourself and you get married to a man who doesn't know himself, he will frustrate you. Be careful in him being lost he doesn't make you lose you. When marriages go bad, the repurcations are heaviest on the woman.

13. Just because you have a relationship with God or you marry someone who has a relationship with God does not mean your marriage will work. You two have to learn to relate with each other, not just with God

14. There are good men in this world, just like there are good women in this world. You will not encounter those good men if you keep entertaining the wrong ones and frequenting where the wrong ones dwell

15. During dating, if you want to see the calibre of man you are getting to know, put off sex and see if he will stay, if he is interested for more than just sex. Be careful, some men will tell you all kinds of promises to get you to bed. They are just curious about how sexing you feels like, not interested to grow with you. Once they sex you, the curiosity goes, especially after you get pregnant

16. Relationships/marriages don't always end or struggle because of the man, sometimes you are the problem. Learn to be honest and objective to see your wrong. If you two work together, your love will grow stronger

17. An insecure man will fight everything that is good about you; from your success, your career, your beauty, your personality, your education and he will blame you for his own issues. He is the problem, not you. Don't dim your light for a man whose identity is in darkness

18. If you have a good man, don't exaggerate the wrong he has done today to the point that you forget how good he has been to you. Don't make him feel unappreciated because he didn't do as you wanted him to today. Keep your perspective and don't overreact

19. Don't be that woman who has been so damaged by wrong men that when the good man comes along you push him away

20. Before you go and share your issues with your man to your friends, share them with him. The solution lies between you two. If he is stubborn or you two still disagree, then share with someone he can be accountable to, like a true friend or a counsellor, if it gets worse, involve both your parents

21. Disagreement or a bad day in your relationship or marriage doesn't mean it is breaking apart. Keep calm. Don't panic

22. No matter how much your husband loves you, he might not see your dreams or even support you that much. You have to learn to defend and nurture your dreams even if he doesn't get it

22. Complaining and nagging will never give you the desired results, it will only push your man away from you and make him tolerate you instead of enjoy you. If you want to inspire him to do more for and with you, appreciate him, have pleasant conversations with him, be easy to talk to

23. If you don't learn how to say no, people and the world will use you and dump you

24. Remember, there is more to life than marriage, sex and having children. You are a blessing with so much to accomplish and pursue as an individual

25. Don't be hard on yourself. Pat yourself on the back for how far you have come.

[dstnyher]

Why do men cheat?

If you asked ten people to define cheating, you’d probably get ten different answers. Some people consider a wandering eye the mark of a cheater, while others define it as strictly sexual conduct outside a marriage or committed relationship. Some people feel that online affairs are cheating, while others think that flirtation even in person is completely acceptable.

It’s also tough to determine the reasons people cheat—they’re different in every relationship. If you’re dealing with a cheating partner, your best bet is to come right out and ask. However, getting a straight answer from the guilty party isn’t always easy.

So Why do cheaters cheat?

Poor self-control. A person who has difficulty controlling impulses might act without thinking. If the opportunity presents itself, a person with poor self-control might cheat.

Selfishness. Someone who puts his or her needs and wants before their partner’s may not care that there could be negative consequences for their actions.

A need for attention, whether physical or emotional. When a person doesn’t get the fulfillment they need within a relationship, they may go outside it to have their needs met.

Boredom. Some people are natural thrill-seekers, and they may thrive on the excitement an extramarital affair will provide.

Insecurity. People who are insecure might use an affair as a way of feeling more secure by thinking things like “I can get others to have feelings for me; that’s how good I am.”

If your partner cheats on you, you have two main options: stay or go. Staying means you’ll have to forgive your spouse and learn to let go of the hurt, anger and resentment they caused you.

[dstnyher]

I hate small talk.

I wanna talk about atoms, death, aliens, sex, magic, intellect, the meaning of life, far away galaxies, the lies you've told, your flaws, your favorite scents, your childhood, what keeps you up at night, your insecurity

and fears...

I like people with depth, who speak with emotion from a twisted mind.

I don't want to know "what's up".

[dstnyher]

A person is dangerous when he can't live alone and badly needs someone's attention to feed his own ego. When he feels sad and alone he collected female attention in order to feel an assurance of his own existance.

[dstnyher]

The Sea is Vast as It is

In a sea of strangers, you've longed to know me,

Your life spent sailing to my shores

The arms that yearn to hold me,

will ache beneath the heavy oars,

Please take your time and take it slowly

as all you do will run its course

And nothing else can take what only

was meant as solely yours.

[dstnyher]

A Letter to anyone hardworking

This letter is to you..

The you thats had a rough week. The you that seems to be in a constant storm clouds. The you that feels invisible. The you that doesn't know how much longer you can hold on. The you that has lost faith. The you that always blames yourself for everything that goes wrong.

Just know that you are incredible. You make this world a little bit more wonderful. You have so much potential and so many things left to do. You have time and better things are coming your way. So please hang in there. You can do it.

[dstnyher]

Modern love...

People don't like love, they like that flittery flirty feeling. They don't love love. Love is sacrificial, it's not emotive. Our culture doesn't love love, it loves the idea of love. It wants the emotions without paying anything for it. Ridiculous

04-08-24

[dstnyher]

An Old Soul

The person who wore a pink polo shirt

There is a beautiful thing inside you that is thousand years of old

Too old to be captured in poems and fossils

Too old to be loved by everyone

But loved so deeply by a chosen few

[dstnyher]

Happiness

That I have a home to go back in the evening

That I have a person to think of when Im exhuasted

That I have a song to sing when I feel that life gets tough.

In the end of the day

We all live in poetry we can't all write

-Grace

[dstnyher]

source

[dstnyher]

@caseyxjean

[dstnyher]

08-04-21

Why did no one ever teach you that you cannot turn people into homes

Your home does have a heart beat, but it isn't one locked in someone else's chest.

Just look inside your own.

[dstnyher]

The Writing Insecurity

Not feeling good enough about myself has been an issue since I was little, and find the older I get, the harder it becomes to deal with these things..

Being a woman we're naturally wired to be more sensitive, to have those extra insecurities, and feel every word sometimes deeper than they were intended, with the age of some social media platforms, young girls are growing up, constantly comparing themselves to others, often left feeling that they simply are not good enough.

As what I've observe to some girls especially to those people I deeply encourage today to be better. Being a person with a lot of sensitivity in the environment and virtually growing up with social media. Every time they scroll, they compare, scroll and compare.

These are the ways to avoid being insecure, something I would recommend to those who are facing their tough times.

*Always appreciate your unique perspective- No one can articulate the same things as you do and no one can see the world like you. always be grateful in your own perception. It's your asset.

*Conversation through Writing- Fundamentals are great the more we speak, the same thing as writing. Our brains do operate, for instance in a push and pull conversation we dig our ideas further. Writing much like a good discussion, can help us go deeper.

*Believe in Yourself- Fear is a set of handcuffs. If you don't believe in yourself no one else either

*Write for someone specific- Write as though you are speaking to them. Design your jokes to make them smile, your words to feel them near. Nothing will crystallize your voice. Write for the people who deserve your word. It doesn't matter who it is, it doesn't have to be the same person twice.

*Allowing influences to inspire you- creativity is borrowed. None of our thoughts are formed within our natural cycle but some of it are models. Inspiration lives inside of us, and our subconscious never forgets. We don't need to copy what nor who inspire us, their hand is always there to guide us.