dyketime

[dyketime]

[dyketime]

“lesbian” is not a dirty word

after watching hannah gadsby’s nanette on netflix, I went on to look for some articles about her, and like, 80% chose to use the word “gay” or “q*eer” to describe her.

I wondered why. why is that, that so many people are scared of the word lesbian?

Maybe it’s bc lesbians are seen as terfy “man hating feminists” or just sex objects, so people prefer distancing themselves from the word.

which is so fucking harmful, because it lumps lesbians all together as either transphobes or just objects for men.

another reason why people take their distances I think it’s bc nowadays, people have spread the idea that sexuality is fluid for everyone.

but it is not the case for everyone. and saying that your sexuality is not fluid is Not transphobic, as some might argue. I am a lesbian and I am attracted to cis and trans women and nb people who are aligned with womanhood and are comfortable with me being a lesbian. being a lesbian is Not, in any way shape or form transphobic.

the word lesbian is full of history and love and magic.

pls pls pls, so many young women and nblw are scared to use the word “lesbian” bc the see it as dirty or offensive. hell, even I struggle to say the word lesbian im my native tongue.

but normalising the word for a new generation outside of the context of porn or criticising transphobic feminists is important. we must challenge people’s discomfort so that we can help remove some of the stigma that’s attached itself to an important, historical, beautiful identity.

[dyketime]

we’re supporting bi girls and lesbians all 2019 beetch

[dyketime]

womanhood is really just Traumatising huh

[dyketime]

Just read a radical feminist say something really revealing: “men thinking our bodies are inferior is the root of our oppression”

This is a fundamentally idealist argument. It assumes that set of beliefs and ideas are the source of material oppression. This is why Wittig matters. She reveals the materialist perspective that in fact the economic subordination of women within an economy of heterosexuality is the source of oppression. The ideology of sexual difference which says women’s bodies are inferior is in fact a superstructure which arises from this economic relationship.

Ideas are not the fundamental problem. Ideas come from somewhere, and that somewhere is material and economic. Radical feminism misses this.

[dyketime]

Ace people “coming out” as ace to their coworkers, their boss, or anyone they dont have a personal relationship with is not revolutionary or brave in any way, in fact it is mostly just weird that you think you need to tell these people about how much or how little you feel sexual attraction. It is never going to be the same as a gay person’s employer finding out about their relationships and it is never going to carry the same consequences, you guys just really wanna feel special.

[dyketime]

me talking to my lesbian and bi women friends: i don’t believe that “attraction” is a well-defined concept and i generally lean social constructivist when it comes to sexual orientation—what i identify as my lesbianism arises in a certain social context and i don’t necessarily think it’s some kind of mystical and essential part of me. i think it’s ok to define your orientation that way if you want but i also think that, especially for women, many people find it more healing to define it sort of actively. you’re not beholden to an immutable Nature that you can’t challenge; you can define what you want and seek. as such there’s more of a gray space between lesbianism and bisexuality than many people would tell you, and sometimes choosing one label over the other is a matter of gut feeling and not the cold scientific distinction people may picture. of course it doesn’t make sense to call yourself a lesbian if you’re pursuing men, but in dealing with misogyny and compulsory heterosexuality a woman may make the choice of whether or not to include some kind of “potential” attraction to men in her orientation. basically, if you want to be a lesbian, you can be a lesbian, and if you want to be a bisexual woman, you can be a bisexual woman. sexuality should be something you actively participate in and that makes you feel happy and comfortable with yourself, not something preexisting that you just can’t escape from and are forced to accept.

me talking to men or straight people or people whose politics i don’t know and trust: i was born this way.

[dyketime]

This post came to me in a dream like 3 days ago

[dyketime]

[dyketime]

I was thinking about how you never really see older bi women portrayed or talked about in any way and how bisexuality is linked to immaturity all the time, and then thought about how this fits into the inverse stereotype of lesbians as the old unwed cat lady, and how these are both part of the same misogynist narrative: a woman is bisexual when she’s young and attractive and trying to gain male attention, and she retires as a lesbian when no man wants her. It’s all an attempt to revolve w/w attraction around men, all misogyny.

[dyketime]

Reminder that including all aces in the lgbt+ community doesn’t mean that all aces will want to participate

Many cishet aces aren’t interested in being a part of the lgbt+ community

Many cishet aces consider themselves more of allies to the lgbt+ community

Either is fine, cishet aces should be allowed to participate and identify as they wish without being pressured in either direction

This doesn’t mean that those that do should be denied a thriving community and resources

[dyketime]

gay as a ‘slur’: original meaning was happiness or cheerfulness, got adapted to mean sga men or ppl for over 200 years, then, bc if that affiliation, homophobic society used it as a negative word

queer as a slur: originally meant odd or strange and then was adapted to harass lgbt ppl bc they were seen as odd or strange, then some small circles “reclaimed” it

Queer started as a slur; gay did not. You can never fully REclaim something that was never claimed

[dyketime]

I have just read an inclusionist saying that trans people only exists in our society because of the gender binary and that dysphoria comes from society, so in a non transphobic and non sexist society dysphoria wouldn’t exist, and I have to say that that’s terribly stupid and transphobic. Like, you really don’t see that saying that there’s a form of making trans people “disappear” and that we trans people are only a result of our society is one of the most terribly transphobic things you can say and one of the most used anti-trans arguments of our time? Yeah, dysphoria gets worse due to societal expectations, but that absolutely doesn’t mean that without society dysphoria won’t exist. It doesn’t matter how much society changes or if gender roles dissappear, trans people will always exist because our existence have nothing to do with gender roles or with homophobia.

[dyketime]

A contribution

[dyketime]

i don’t mind the straights but i draw the line at straight people having kids :/ it’s unnatural and unfair, a child needs 2 fathers or 2 mothers. what are all the other kids going to say when they find out your kid has a mother AND a father. kids shouldn’t be exposed to the straight lifestyle, they deserve normal parents

[dyketime]

Stop comparing afab butches to trans men. Lets talk abt experiences afab butches and trans women have in common instead.

-Other women don’t think we should be allowed to use female restrooms or locker rooms/ other female exclusive spaces because they characterize us as perverts/predators

-Sometimes we pass as male and people treat us accordingly (can be advantageous but they’ll find out we’re not men eventually)

-Going off of that^ the experience of being in the company of men when they think women aren’t around

-High risk of being assaulted/kicked out/on the streets because we don’t/can’t conform

-Still not being able to pass as “woman enough” even when we put a lot of effort into it

-Being excluded from women because we’re too much like men

Reblog and add your own?

[dyketime]

is your child texting about butches????

ily: i love youbutches

ilysm: i love youbutches so much

lmao: loving my amazing obutches

abab: all butches are beautiful

lol: lover of lesbianbutches