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easter-lily · 3 years

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2021-06-15 07:26

Yet another day of being useless.

Managed to retain intermittent fasting and wrote a bit of words yesterday. Just a bit. Maybe a sentence or so. Was completely blocked on my assignment. Just, no words came. The fear was too great. It was paralyzing. I wish I could set myself on fire.

The situation affected the community more than I expected. Managed to arrange the transition smoothly, or at least smoother than I thought.

Cat and new cat continues to yowl at each-other. I have no idea what's their actual relationship. New cat still flee from my touch, really make me wonder how it grew-up.

Currently in the middle of intermittent fasting. It goes well so far.

I'll need to do laundry very soon. Maybe tomorrow, at the latest.

Shallots and garlics continues to grow well. Mint, too. Spot a weed on the mint pot, but decided to let it go for now. I'll need to fertilize mint, somehow. It almost completely covered the whole container, so I can't rely on letting mulch decomposing.

It's raining today, so it's pretty cold. Twenty-three or so. My nose is mildly clogged. I see no chicken flock, not even the cock's cries. They'll probably alright.

Saw one of hummingbird's vegetable's flowers. Was too lazy, decided not to bother harvesting it. Lots of pods. Pretty old now though, so probably not a good eating. Not old enough to be seeds, though.

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easter-lily · 3 years

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2021-06-14 08:53

Spend a pleasant night yesterday discussing OCs, basically. Not so pleasant sleep, though. Got two hours before being awakened, then spending it on OCs. Perhaps those two are related.

Further sleep after that is only a bit less than four hours, apparently. At least going by my Mi band - but well, it's not exactly the best at counting sleep. Manual timekeeping told me I've spent seven hours or so sleeping, but it does count attempt at sleeping. So who knows.

Shouldn't be too bad, though. Hopefully this means today I'll get uninterrupted sleep. This is new week too, so fingers' crossed.

No chicken flock today. Yesterday only one cock appear, but I did see the rest of flock at the other end of the road - perhaps the new construction scared them. I give the cock half dried bread, and some eel bones. It was eager to eat, but also a lot more wary. Can't really blame it, it's just a lone cock without a flock, after all. It even go away much quicker. Fortunate I don't give much food to it.

Cousin's durian seeds has grown tiny leaves. I think they should be moved to proper plot soon, but my uncle doesn't seems to be in a hurry.

Cat continues to attempt at courting the new cat. I can't say if it's successful. The new cat, which seems to be female, mewed against my cat. I wonder sometimes if teaching consent is possible to cat, but that seems unlikely.

Discovered yesterday old cat deliberately come inside to shit, which doesn't exactly made me like it. It makes that digging gesture cat made on the sand, except it was on the tile. Then it put its butt 'on' the 'hole'. I immediately removed it to outside, but it didn't shit. So, who knows - maybe I'm wrong, maybe it didn't actually want to shit. I'm not a cat, after all.

Mint seems happy on new location. Trouble is it get relatively little rain, so I actually need to water it. Hopefully when it's properly overgrown again, I can put it somewhere open, and it'll be able to thrive even against determined chicken flock.

Tomato plants continues to struggle. I admit, I've grown them now less with expectation for tomatoes, more wanting to know how long I can keep it going. Of six, only two manages to grow tall and flowers. Well, three, but chicken or something snapped it, so two. The other four remains tiny. None of them fruits so far. Their chance of fruiting is further reduced by constant rain, though if it's proper variety it should still fruit, even if only once or twice.

In contrast, shallot and garlics flourishes. Shallots has very visibly multiplied. I've only put one bulb - well, two bulb as it turned out - but I can see something around four, six visible bulbs at least. Garlics remain safely underground, but it's still growing strong. I've heard being in hot climate, it won't flower, but I'm curious what happened if I'll keep them as long as possible.

My deadline is approaching, which is never a pleasant sensation. Still, if I worked a bit here and there, it should be alright. So long I make a progress - good progress, I'll be fine.

I'm trying to restart my intermittent fasting, starting today. So, I won't get breakfast - lunch only. Saves breakfast and dinner for lunch, next day. Well, just breakfast now, but it should be sufficient. Maybe more milk will help?

I still have many seeds for leaf celery. Perhaps I should grew them. I don't think I'll have enough space for them, admittedly, but that's probably alright. Can just put them somewhere, I think. Plenty of good ground, so long I'm not too picky who owns what

The construction work does get annoying, though. Means I have to be careful with plants. Oh, I've put most of them away, but if I want to grow celery... well, that's another matter, isn't it.

Anyway. Today, my main obstacles would be my despair, my gluttony, and my despair. For despair, I'll remember I don't do this just for myself - but also for others. To delight them, to make them happy. For my gluttony, I'll remember that today is a new day. If I get this one's right, I can handle the rest of the week. Remember to be generous

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easter-lily · 3 years

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2021-06-09 20:25

I didn't write much today. Perhaps just two hundreds words or so, and it took me an hour. I wrote until I felt I couldn't write more, though, and I think that's enough. I managed to hold on for a couple hours, before buying a whole lot of take out - so, will need better way of not indulging.

There was only one cock that appear in the afternoon. I'm not sure where's the rest of the flock. I gave it half a presumably-moldy bread. It seems happy enough.

I managed to avoid caffeine past noon today, which is nice. I think I consume a little too much sugar, though. Talking about sugar, that mobile bread-seller near four-way is quite pricy, but delicious. Something to consider in the future.

Tomorrow, I'll feel loathing and despair when I write. I should accept it's normal, and let it pass. I'll also feel an urge to overindulge - I'm... not sure how to fix this part, save perhaps hiding my money from myself. Somehow. A tall order.

I also want to minimize my time for idle browsing. Going full offline could work, but I do have obligation that required me to keep my computer online. Perhaps I can arrange it to stay up when I'm sleeping? Interesting idea.

I'm not quite sleepy. It was suggested I stay up as long as possible, to ensure maximum sleepiness. If I can't get good length of sleep today, perhaps it's because of recent meal.

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easter-lily · 3 years

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2021-06-09 06:50

So far, the day started well enough. Managed to wake-up at good hour. Fed chicken. They seems to accept moldy bread just fine, but I've read a case of pet monkey died after eating moldy bread, so hopefully it's actually fine. Watered mint just a bit, it was raining yesterday, they probably don't need much. That new cat appeared again, still quite shy. Wary with my cat, and they hissed at each-other, but no physical confrontation.

Does make my cat more affectionate a bit, though, so I don't mind much.

Still feeling somewhat crummy. Let's see, the obstacle I'll encounter today would be the despair and hopelessness for finishing my writing at a good amount of time, indulgent urge at eating and sleeping a lot, and reflexive reaching-out at phone or chat to banish boredom.

I'll remember I write is just not for my self, but for others - I can't let them down. I'll remind myself with my ideal body, whenever I feel the urge to indulge. And for banishing boredom-

Well, no way around it. I'll store my phone somewhere else, and close my chat program.

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