eckkeh - Tumblr blog

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Something that will never NOT make me laugh is the fact that the Gortash fandom is like, "We will WILLINGLY band together and PAY for JASON ISAACS himself to do more Gortash lines if we can romance him" and honestly, that's dedication.

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Very funny to me how Gortash flip flops between expecting you to be evil with him vs chiding your savior complex, especially if you’re Durge.

Lord Gortash over here talking about how it’ll be all my fault when corpses start washing up on the beach. Uh huh. Enver. Look me in my Bhaalspawn eyes, Enver. Corpses? Because of me? Groundbreaking.

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a torn strip of paper with two lines of barely legible script

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So I think in most things, Xan (the gith egg baby) would be like a completely average kid but Lae’zel would genuinely be like “Incredible. Few would be able to finger paint with such dexterity. You can see the images with clarity and passion that most artists would only dream to achieve.” because she would genuinely believe that but with everything he does

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Someone forgot about sunscreen. ☀️

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Oh hey Gortash.

Credit: @reminasantalilio

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Inside me are two wolves - one wants to play Baldur’s Gate and the other wants to draw Baldur’s Gate.

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Shane: [sneaks into the house wearing a big coat]

Marnie: What’s with the big coat?

Shane’s coat: [muffled cluck]

Shane: Drugs

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these are actual diagnoses from my dr appt today

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Karlach: "This is it. I'm gonna finally kill Gortash. 🔥😠🔥"

Wyll: "My dad is here, Karlach. 🥺"

Tav: "There's also a ton of giant rock-em sock-em robots, but sure, your terrible dad is the obstacle here. 🙄"

(I love how whiny he sounds when he says it, tho. Like, "omg, karlach, stop, ur embarrassing mee" 💀)

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Listen. I don't know exactly how long Durge and Gortash knew each other, but wouldn't it have been absolutely hilarious. if upon meeting karlach the first time just

Wyll: ah I have finally found you, advocatus diaboli-

Karlach: yeah okay give me a minute before you kill me, YOURE THAT GUY THAT FUCKED ENVER WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE

durge, like 3 days old, freshly discovering the whole "sex" thing again: I did what. With who

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I feel bad for Ketheric Thorm because he went mad with grief and loss, I also feel bad for him because if Gortash and Dark Urge were constantly whispering and giggling and sitting in each other's laps during their evil chosen three meetings in front of ME, I'd definitely mock the Dark Urge when they came back to me with no memory of what happened and also not tell Gortash what happened to them even though I probably knew.

Like I'd definitely be like, *nodding at dark urge* that's what you get for being a whore, and *nodding at gortash* I'm not telling you shit about your slut. Fuck you for making me third wheel. You guys thought you were so cool and smart and sexy for coming up with your dumb plan well, your stupid romance ruined everything, hope you're happy, harlots.

And then I'd fuck off and die.

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Sceleritas Fel Disapproves (of any significant others Durge decides to have)

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FIX-IT AU 2

bullying Cazador is a thing good and right 🖤