edwardskhakipants - Tumblr blog

[edwardskhakipants]

it’s because you’re always romancing that damn vampire

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i'm really out here saying i could fix the twilight saga like it's an emotionally unavailable boyfriend

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Chapter 4 posted now! We get a peek into Edward's mind for a bit. It might clear a few things up...

Impeccable Face Value

A Twilight Fanfic

FFN

A03

"He pushed the door open with his shoulder, moving with too much grace for someone of his size. From across the room, he caught her staring. Bella’s breath caught in her throat. His eyes widened. Then dulled, disinterested with what they landed on.

The same golden eyes that haunted Bella’s dreams every night since she first saw them last summer."

Vampire!Edward x Human!Bella. Heavily Rory x Jess inspired.

[edwardskhakipants]

Rialto Beach, Washington. April 2021.

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Forever and always a defender of fictional men who suck a little but 90% of people are wrong about why they suck.

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You're dead serious. I'm alive silly. We're not the same

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TWILIGHT (2008) | deleted scenes

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the fact that i'm no longer the same age as the protagonists of novels and films i once connected to is so heartbreaking. there was a time when I looked forward to turning their age. i did. and i also outgrew them. i continue to age, but they don't; never will. the immortality of fiction is beautiful, but cruel.

[edwardskhakipants]

Some obvious facts:

The Black Death reduced the population of Europe by between one third and one half.

Vampires are immune to mortal ailments.

Late 14th-century Europe suffers from a massive vampire surplus.

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no no no, it’s totally fine—will you excuse me for a moment? (steps outside to shriek and sob)

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Undefeated OTP

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you know, you really gotta hand it to smeyer for writing a 'happy ending' that literally has every character worse off than before edward met bella

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would have loved to see the absolute mental unraveling of Edward Cullen during his honeymoon. in just a few short days the man goes from "oh no, i'm going to have to be physically intimate with my new extremely breakable wife," to "Oh No, that was the hottest night of my existence & i almost broke my new extremely breakable wife so now i definitely can't do this again even if it's hottest thing i'll ever do," to "oh nO, my new extremely breakable wife is wearing vIRTUALLY NOTHING on this hot tropical island & she's finally got the confidence to try & seduce me & i have to reject her despite kNOWING HOW GREAT IT IS TO HAVE SEX WITH HER" to "OH NO MY WIFE IS WEARING THE WORLD'S SCRAPPIEST BLACK LACE NIGHTGOWN & IS BEGGING ME TO HAVE SEX WITH HER BUT I CAN'T BUT I WANT TO BUT I'LL KILL HER BUT-

[edwardskhakipants]

This is how I think Renesmee looks like, and I don't mean it as a eewww stinky demon doll baby.

I think she would look like a literal doll, porcelain skin but with the little blush and rosy lips, unusual eye color, healthy hair and precious curls. And the way Rosalie (yes, Rosalie not Bella) dresses her wouldn't help with her blending in with a normal human child.

I think most people go for the horrible looking puppet on Twilight that they kinda forget how she's supposed to look like.

And yes, I got my interpretation from the Illustrated guide.

I don't care about Renesmee enough to hate her, she's a little creepy and I love that honestly, you go demon baby! terrorize everyone around you, girl!

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Being a young adult is so strange. You enter a coffee shop. The 20 year old girl waiting behind you cried all night because she just came to a new city for university and she feels so alone. That 27 year old guy over there works a job he is overqualified for, he lives with his parents and wants to move out but doesn't know what to do about it. That one 24 year old dude already has a car, a house, and a job waiting for him once he graduates thanks to his dad's connections. The 26 year old barista couldn't complete his higher education because he has to work and take care of his family. The 28 year old girl sitting next to you has no friends to go out with so she is texting her mother. That couple (both 25 years old) are married and the girl is pregnant. The 29 year old writing something on her laptop has realized that she chose the wrong major so she is trying to start all over. We are not alone in this, but we are actually so alone. Do you feel me

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[edwardskhakipants]

a guy can pass out at the mere thought of getting blood drawn but feel inexplicable fondness and lust towards vampires. It can happen