effulgenthallie - Tumblr blog

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scoobies and dawn: idk buff its kind of shitty of you to work so much that you can’t hang out with us :/ that’s like.. really annoying :/ we miss you

spike: if i was crawling on my hands and knees through a burning desert and an angel offered me unlimited pints of virgin blood i would still rather lick the hamburger scented sweat from the back of your neck and if you asked, i’d let the sun turn me to dust

buffy: i think i’m no longer human, that’s the only way my feelings for spike make sense

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spuffy brainrot has fully set in. i think they should have sex and she keeps her cross necklace on and he gets little burns all over his body WHO SAID THAT

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She deserved better!!!

- me about every female character on buffy

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— Virginia Woolf, in a letter to Violet Dickinson, September 1907

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i gotta go to sleep but first let me just say in btvs 5x22 “the gift” when spike and buffy go to buffy’s house there’s that little moment of disconnect where spike is very aware that he can’t enter and he doesn’t try to push the issue at all, he’s just like i can wait here and you can hand me the weapons, but buffy doesn’t seem to remember at first that he’s not allowed in, like it just doesn’t occur to her, and when he reminds her she readily gives him permission. and you can see him smiling but like trying not to make a big deal out of it but he’s obviously so pleased and so moved. i just love seeing that slight disconnect in their relationship where spike thinks he’s not welcome inside, because that was what she told him the last time it came up, and he didn’t want to respect it then but he’s respecting it now. whereas buffy in the past few episodes has come to rely so much on spike and has such comfort and trust in him at least with certain things that in her mind she’s just like, well obviously he’s allowed in, that’s not even a question. and in this little moment you see how thrilled and honored he is to be trusted this way. oh it’s so cute

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Collage #168

Willow is such an autumn girl, her personality feels like a warm hug while drinking apple cider.

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spuffy can be a lesbian age gap ship if you’re brave

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3.14 || 3.15 || 6.13

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buffy text posts pt. 2! these are so fun to make :))

(pt. 1)

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Every Tara look: S4E17 Superstar

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spike + textposts

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If there's one thing Spike's gonna do, it's tilt his head to the side like a dog while he listens to Buffy talk

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crazy that Holden Webster is the only vampire we see that is sired by spike. the vampire who gives buffy a therapy session. and is a little shit. and just kinda wants to have a conversation with buffy before they have to duel to the death. hmmmmmmmmm.

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spike to buffy‘s face like “well me personally i’d go on a suicide mission for you because i love you” two seasons before he does. william you are so important.

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My favourite collage I've done so far. Absolutely in love.

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buffy knows spike loves her during season five. buffy knows spike loves her when she comes back and seeks comfort/silence in his presence. and as she comes back to herself and tries to make peace with the fact that she’s Here Again, she still knows he loves her. and i think part of the Big Bad Grabbing The Slayer For The Darkness routine they both cling to is that it allows them to pretend this huge thing isn’t between them so they can get what they both want (someone to stay).

and like obviously buffy cannot allow herself to believe that he loves her for many reasons, but she DOES believe it, she can’t make herself unknow it even though she tries so hard. which is partially where the breakdown with tara in 6.13 comes from because the cognitive dissonance of soulless spike loving her as if he has a soul while she is so lost within herself that the only way she can reach for him is to use him (which would be fine if he was the big bad grabbing the slayer for the darkness) which is hurting him! unfathomably! but he’s supposed to be the corruption! how can he??? any of it???

meanwhile spike has watched the woman he loves be brought back as a shell and he wants to see the light in her eyes and he can touch her now and sometimes that’s enough to make her laugh but he can’t linger in those moments or she’ll go away again! so he can play the role he needs to play so she’ll stay, as if he could keep her anywhere she didn’t want to be. as if he wants her to be in the dark instead of bringing him into the light. but how could he ask for anything more when he already got her back and he didn’t even need to kill her afterwards.

and so they hurt each other and he forgets himself and asks her if she even likes him and it’s too honest and he’s asking too much (he asks for nothing) so before she can throw her life away like it’s nothing, he puts the game face on, makes himself a target, and swallows it all. and she can’t unknow. and it would all be fine except he’s a vampire and she’s the slayer and how can he just say it like it’s nothing when she needs to beat his face in just to keep from screaming.