eggsformylegs

[eggsformylegs]

One time I was cooking with a girl and we were both bilingual but we didn’t have a language in common so we were just sitting by the fire doing prep work quietly and I was peeling little garlic cloves to mince and she put her hand on my arm to stop me and demonstrated how you’re supposed to press on the clove with the flat side of your knife to break the shell off all at once to peel it and I was like oh! And I imitated her and she nodded in approval and we went back to quietly peeling and mincing the garlic and I don’t want to be hyperbolic but in that moment I was like wow I truly understand the universal thread of human love and connection inherent in our souls or whatever

[eggsformylegs]

*walks up to a gay couple* wait which one of you is the heart cat and which is the skull cat

[eggsformylegs]

glassblowing videos are great because you get to watch the incredible precision and skill of a seasoned professional as they craft the tackiest item you’ve ever seen 

[eggsformylegs]

translation: “My sheep! [bah! bah!] You are my life. [bah! bah!] Walk behind me…[bah! bah!] Sing (after me).”

[eggsformylegs]

HUGE NEWS!! THE SUPREME COURT JUST HAD A MASSIVELY IMPORTANT RULING THAT RESULTED IN NEARLY HALF OF OKLAHOMA BEING RETURNED TO THE NATIVES!

HERES AN ARTICLE ABOUT IT

[eggsformylegs]

[eggsformylegs]

someone teach me how to draw bears

[eggsformylegs]

[eggsformylegs]

Me when my players are trying to guess the answer to a puzzle

[eggsformylegs]

…good morning …it’s already baby hours

[eggsformylegs]

the funniest hp lovecraft story is the one where some guy’s family offended an evil wizard who then cursed his entire family saying that all the men would die before they hit like 30. the protagonist is going crazy trying to find a spell to break the curse and then the big reveal was that the wizard was literally just breaking into their house and killing them himself. 

[eggsformylegs]

(this thread)

Had a bit of a rant this morning. Gender is a construct and biology is a joke. Trans lives matter.

[eggsformylegs]

i honestly dont get why people stopped reblogging things they like on here bc like what are you afraid of??? people thinking youre cringey?? guess what bitch! youre on tumblr! it's all cringey! reblog everything you like and do it shamelessly no one fuckin cares

[eggsformylegs]

murdoc eat deodorant instead of applying it

[eggsformylegs]

[eggsformylegs]

Tfw when men do that thing where they pretend they have no control over their temper. LOL It’s so funny like am I supposed to pretend that I don’t know you’re completely self-aware and present during this rage performance. Or should I pretend you’re the tortured hero in a movie, possessed by a series of fabricated flashbacks of the war and your father

[eggsformylegs]

All day I have been thinking about this image. All day. Horse