eisenvulcanstein

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it doesn’t have to be good it just has to be done

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— @eternaldroplets on x (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

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A dark comedy about a cult leader who suddenly comes to his senses, realises that running a cult actually fucking sucks, tries to quit several times but the followers are too clingy, until he realises that the only way to get rid of them is to fake his own death in the most credible, believable, tangible way possible, in a way where absolutely none of them could deny that they really saw their leader straight-up die right in front of their eyes. Wouldn't even cross their minds to doubt that the corpse isn't the real deal. Their idea that their precious leader could never die (he said so once, while on cocaine) is shattered, their whole world is shattered.

So the former cult leader weasels out of it and starts a brand new, completely normal life somewhere else, happily pretending that absolutely none of that ever happened.

And then the followers find him again.

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Add realism to your fantasy stories by having characters from different backgrounds struggle to pronounce each others' names.

"My name is [low guttural sound] but I don't want to hear you butcher it. So you may call me She Who Arises With The Cold Mountain Sun."

"...Is that what your name really means? All that in just one word?"

"Yes. If you stress the wrong syllable it comes out as 'She Who Coldly Wakes Up The Mountain Sun', or 'The Cold Woman Who Wakes The Mountain Sun', and you will not call me that."

"Oh, huh. Could we just call you Mountain Sun, for short?"

"Hmh. It's boastful, almost bordering on blasphemy, but it is flattering. I accept it."

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everyone on replies is terrified of this fact but i just think it's so sweet and heartwarming. she's holding our hand and leading us somewhere secret and we're both giggling like kids. i love her

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Spite can be a incredible motivator

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huge shout out to this little kid for writing my favorite poem

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A fantasy story starting with the protagonist minding her own business gathering firewood, when a demon appears out of nowhere announcing that she belongs to him now. The protagonist demands to know on what grounds, she's never signed no damn contract. The demon is kind of baffled by this, and awkwardly explains that just now her father had promised his firstborn for something, and she is his firstborn.

The protagonist digs her heels in and says no, she never knew her biological father and by the way the demon explained the situation, evidently her father also doesn't know that he already has a daughter, so therefore the man who had made no contribution to her life after he bred and fled has no claim to her as something he could barter.

Not giving a shit about the fact she's gambling her life in doing so, the protagonist makes contact with the local woodland fae, asking them to negotiate on her side. The fae think that this is fucking hilarious and go with her. So, having lawyered up and with a reluctant demon in tow, the protagonist heads off on a quest to find her father and do whatever it takes to wrangle everyone involved into unmaking the contract.

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when your stomach is really mad at you and you're not sure which one of your fourteen unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it

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Any day now

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Hey just a quick check in- now that musk is like severely imploding on trump and their severed ties

Yall won't forget this part right?

Yall won't forget he's still a massive scumbag right? That he's still a nazi right? That won't get lost in translation right???

(I don't THINK it'll get forgotten but I really want to remind people that just because Musk is now bashing trump for all the shit we've known about him for awhile that we don't forget he was complicit. If anything his bashing and airing out trumps laundry makes it worse, because he KNEW all that and still worked with him.)

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