elaborateruses - Tumblr blog

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leverage season 1 plot

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I hate it when I talk wistfully about the ancient world and then people are like “you wouldn’t survive back then” yeah obviously I would die immediately but do you think achilles would be able to survive in the modern world if he had to send one polite email? no

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litmus test for tumblr olds

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GLaDOS: I spent some time researching common human insecurities so I might better insult you. I've discovered that physical insecurities often manifest due to feelings of envy stemming from comparing oneself to others.

GLaDOS: There are no other humans in this facility. Just you. Therefore, you lack a source of envy of which would trigger the feelings of insecurity in your tiny simple human brain.

GLaDOS: A shame, isn't it? I thought so too. Which is why I've taken it upon myself to artificially create a humanoid body for myself so that you'll have someone to envy. A female figure who is taller than you, more mature than you and has larger breasts than you. Gaze upon my new form of perfection and shrink away in your envy. You'll never achieve this level of perfectio- why are you smiling at me like that. Stop it.

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Full isometric game map of Portal 1 video game.

by VGCartography

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shes my barbie doll and brother im playing dress up

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glados saying "once testing starts, im required by protocol to keep interaction with you to a minimum. this will be our only chance to talk." during the beginning of portal 2 only to immediately talk to chell during every single test is funny on its own but that along with the cut scene where she stops the elevator between tests to ask if there's "anything you'd like to say to me? anything at all?"...she's so lonely and desperate </3

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stop putting GLaDOS in polls she's TOO powerful. she's ratioing everybody. sweeping like she's cleaning up for company. why would you put the queen of the fucked up lesbian robots on your poll on the fucked up lesbian robot fucker website? it's barely even fair.

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glados' problem is literally just that she's super fucking horny but the only way she can do anything about it is force hot girls through test chambers

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Yes but what if the Torment Nexus has a like, really hot deep robot woman voice while she tries to murder you and the puzzles are really fun

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actually glados would love “btw. if you even care.” as a way to end literally any sentence if portal was made in the 2020s. like yea. this test was previously a military training course that uses live turrets with real bullets btw. if you even care.

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truly no video game moment will ever surpass the part in portal 2 where glados says "well, this is the part where he kills us" and wheatley says "hello, this is the part where i kill you" and you unlock the achievement titled "the part where he kills you" (description: this is that part) and the chapter title appears on the screen and reads: chapter nine: the part where he kills you

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this is so insanely accurate i dont even know what to say

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GLaDOS is literally the funniest character ever. Her arc culminates in her saying "I hate you so much it's not even worth the trouble of killing you, so just fucking LEAVE. And on your way out here's a full choir to sing 'Goodbye My Darling,' an Aria I wrote in Italian about how I love you and want you to be safe, which mentions you by name. Don't read into it. Get the fuck out. And here, something to remember me by: a box with a heart on it. Leave." to a woman who has literally never responded to anything she's ever said

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number of individual swear words in every fob album

take this to your grave: 2

from under the cork tree: 0

infinity on high: 3

folie a deux: 5

save rock and roll: 10

american beauty american psycho: 1