elbienamado

[elbienamado]

Nova’s comment pulled out an incredulous laugh out of Bibi. “I’m gonna be honest, I’ve been called a lot of things since coming to Ogden but ‘unicorn’ is a new one for me,” Bibiano laughed, his face scrunched up in confusion.

“But I’ll take that last part as a compliment since it means those guy’s genius marketing strategy is actually working,” he joked, pointing to the retreating peanut gallery of frat boys. “Guess I can’t be too mad at them now.”

Bibi lifted an eyebrow at the strange new expression on the other student’s face, a cog clearly running rampant in their head as their eyes gleamed with interest. He gave them another quizzical smile, feeling like a tiny, trembling rabbit in front of a hungry wolf. “Yeah, body oil,” Bibi responded, feeling suddenly self conscious about his shiny, exposed chest. It be weird and noticeable if he crossed his arms, right?

A bark of laughter was pulled out of Bibi’s mouth at Nova’s last question. It had caught him completely by surprise. But they were funny, he’d give them that.

“It’s a special events thing. Usually,” he answered in between chuckles. And he would have probably left it at that, if he didn't have a bad habit of saying ‘yes and’ when he should just quit while he was ahead.

“As for that last part, I am not at liberty to say whether or not Sigma Alpha Epsilon has ever had or will ever have an OnlyFans account after The Incident. You’ll have to go through my lawyer if you want to schedule an interview to discuss that,” Bibiano replied, lifting his chin in a mock challenge.

Despite what anyone who knew of Nova's background, which he hoped was few and far between, thought, it took far lengths to draw any offense or upset out of them — much farther than an accidental, almost run in, even if it the event had come with the unsavory aspect of an unknown substance coating their hands. It's no effort to remain un-phased, mirthful even, a scoff of amusement escaping his lips as his glance drifted towards the now disappearing flock of boys before back to the one that remained in front of them. "I totally would actually." The whole Greek life situation was as much a mystery to Nova as Greer's disappearance, more like the story-line in a television show that anything he actually held weight to. "You guys are kind of like unicorns to me and not only would that certainly fit into what my imagination of it entails, I'm also in no position to call a unicorn a liar." Their brows lift and it's clear within an instant that the things running rampant through their mind are anything but clean. "Body oil?" Unfortunately for him, what was meant to be a defense only opened Bibiano up to more of Nova's absurd thoughts. "Is this like a special events only thing or are you guys giving each other massages on the daily? Because I'll tell you right now, there's no need for any special fundraising when you guys could be banking off of OnlyFans."

[elbienamado]

The very first lessons Bibi had ever learned from his parents was how to feel shame. And it was that same humiliating miasma that permeated every single part of him from the inside out the moment he had made eye contact with Malik. A crushing, soul deep mortification that bled into every single molecule that made up ‘Bibiano De La Cruz.’

Bibi felt his breath quicken in his throat as it collapsed upon it’s self. He didn’t know why he was having such a big reaction. It wasn't as if he had failed to mention the state of his home life to Leaky. Malik had always made himself available to be a shoulder to lean on, so Bibi had—but only in the abstract.

Bibi had an image to upkeep, after all; even in front of his closest friends. Especially in front of his closest friends. He always had to be the immaculate, untouchable ‘golden boy.’ A perfect mirror to Greer’s own larger than life persona. So it only made sense that no one could ever find out how bad things had degraded in the De La Cruz household. How both his parents ignored his calls and left him on ‘read.’ How he hadn’t gone home during Spring Break because he hated feeling like a intruder in his own childhood home; ducking into empty rooms and hiding behind furniture to avoid his father’s wrath, his mother’s disappointment. Because it was all just so—pathetic.

Bibi was so pathetic. Pathetic despite the popularity he had gained in high school and college because at the end of the day he was unwanted by the only people who had ever really mattered to him. His parents. Greer. Surachai.

It was such a fucking cliche and another humiliation. Bibi wondered how Leaky would respond if he admitted these things to him out loud. Though the PIKE VP had been nothing but kind to Bibiano in the handful of years they had known each other, his mind conjured up the sound of Leaky’s laughter—warm, dulcet, and so deep Bibi could feel the buzz of it reverberating in his bones.

The prickly sting of embarrassment flooded Bibi’s cheeks once more. No, Malik wasn’t like that; out of the friends Bibi had been able to choose on his own, Leaky had been one of the best. Had shown him nothing but loyalty and bottomless compassion.

Bibi eyelash fluttered in surprised as he looked at the white carnation in Leaky’s hand. Purity, sweetness, good luck, ‘a mother’s love.’ Bibiano reached out with trembling fingers and gingerly took the flower from his friend. Two heavy tears breached the confines of his lashes, dripping slowly down his cheeks. Embarrassed, Bibi quickly lifted his hands to cover his face, inadvertently crushing the carnation against his jawline. He pressed the palms of his hands into his eye sockets and let out a heavy exhalation of air.

Taking a few calming breaths he scrubbed his face with his hands, trying to calm down the swell of emotions that had built up in his chest. It was silly that such a small thing, and a joke at that, had been what made him cry. But he couldn’t help it. The gesture felt like confirmation that Leaky thought of Bibi when they weren’t together; cared enough about him to think of ways to make him laugh the next time they saw each other.

Moving his hands away from his face and lifting his head, Bibiano felt a fresh set of tears threatening to leak of out if his eyes. He looked up and tried to blink them away before taking another deep breath and turning to his friend. Bibi tried for a smile but felt the muscles in his jaw twitch as the corner of his lips wobbled up and down—he hoped it hadn’t been too noticeable.

“Thanks Leaky,” Bibi croaked out, surprised by how rough his voice sounded even to his own ears. “But, I’m already being a bad date by being late to pick you up. I don’t want to ruin your night any more than I already have.”

honestly, going with friends to events was always the way to go in leaky's mind. especially his disaster last semester when he'd accidentally asked two girls to be his date for pike's fall formal. late at night that embarrassment still haunted him, so to refrain from making that kind of mistake again, leaky was more than relieved to attend the spring fling with bibi.

as a kind gesture, and sort of a joke, he'd picked up a carnation from the school mart for bibiano on his way over to his dorm. to his surprise, the door was cracked, which leaky assumed was for him. without a second thought he pushed his way into the room, about to make some sort of grand and silly gesture to bibi when he caught the words of a conversation he certainly shouldn't be listening in on.

swallowing, leaky didn't know if he should turn back around and knock, acting like he'd just gotten there, or clear his throat to announce his arrival, playing it off like he hadn't walked in on a vulnerable moment. bibi was obviously blinking back tears, annoyed and hurt by whatever was happening on the other line.

just as he was quietly trying to retreat, bibi looked over at him, voice quiet. "uh..." he considered lying, saying he just walked in. but something about bibi's face convinced him otherwise. "just enough to see you're upset." leaky noted stepping forward and giving a sheepish smile. "you okay dude? wanna talk about it?" he moves toward his bed before holding out the white carnation. "oh, and uh i got this for you."

[elbienamado]

mikaishii:

Fingers splayed as she held her arms out wide as if the sticky film might spread like a disease. She tried to be a good enough sport about it, though, schooling her face into something not quite as off-putting as the grimace she felt on the inside. If she thought too hard about the fact that she was partially covered in something sticky that’d rubbed off a man, she was likely to vomit, so she straightened herself, forcing her mind down friendlier paths. “What are you trying to sell? Your dignity?” She snorted a small laugh at herself and nodded her chin in his direction. “You got a towel in your bag of tricks, Krispy Kreme?”

Bibi felt his cheeks pinch with mirth at Mika’s joke, but felt the sting of embarrassment heating up his cheeks at the discomfort he had clearly caused her. Placing a hand on his neck, he gave her a shy smile and mumbled softly, “Yeah, I mean, kinda? It comes with the territory.”

“This,” He said, motioning to his body with a wide flourish of his right arm, “Is a new strategy to sell the whole ‘stupid frat boy’ fantasy people have about us. For both the people who like us and hate us.”

“You’d be surprised how much the circles overlap at the dunk booth,” He chucked scratching his right cheek. “It brings in the big buck, so I can’t really complain too much. It’s all for a good cause in the end, right?”

He laughed again with embarrassment when Ishii asked for a towel; then he turned to the SAE frat boys standing behind him, lifted an eyebrow, and extended a hand, palm side up. In seconds a clean, folded towel was placed into his waiting hand, and he shifted around to smile cheekily at Mika.

“But the frat life’s not without its own perks, though. Despite the whole lack of dignity thing,” He smiled, offering over the sport’s towel with another sympathetic smile. “Anything else I can do for you, Ms. Ishii? To make up for this whole ordeal?”

[elbienamado]

Bibi’s heart almost jumps out of his chest when the sharp complaint reaches his ears. He tries to skid out of the way but overcompensates for the sudden change in momentum and ends up falling onto his hand. Bibiano hisses in pain, realizing he skinned his palms and knees in his attempt to soften his fall. He hears his SAE brothers ask if he’s okay so he waves them off with a single smarting hand.

Twisting around to sit heavily on the floor, his gaze is pulled to the person he had nearly collided into. He stares up at Astrid Fiske in surprise, the adrenaline slowly waning out of his system. “Oh shit, Sassa, my bad! I was distracted and I didn’t see you, I’m so sorry,” Bibi utters in a flurry, registering how bad things could have turned out had they actually collided into each to each other.

“It’s a good thing you managed to get out of the say,” he tried to smile, but his mind was still caught up with the tone of her voice from moments ago. It had caught him so off guard. While it wasn’t like he hadn’t noticed that they had grown more and more apart over the years, he didn’t expect the vitriol.

“Is everything okay, Sass?” He asked from where he sat on the floor.

Sassa had no interest in trying to dunk people in the dunk tank at the carnival, glancing towards the line waiting in front of it with a roll of her eyes as she continued past the horde of frat boys making a scene. She may have been in a sorority, but she hardly found any of them to be worth her time. Even if they deserved to be taken down a few pegs, which she quickly realized the person exiting the tank was someone who certainly did. 

But she’d play the long game, not be fooled into believing that knocking them into some icey water was any sort of real revenge. 

She kept walking by, taking a large loop around to get to the booth she had planned on visiting, just passing the dunk tank as Bibi had apparently exited, the tall male nearly knocking her over in the process. Her upper lip curled up, the invisible feeling far too familiar, especially in the presence of someone like him. “Watch out,” she said in a low voice, daintily stepping out of his path so she wouldn’t get taken down. 

[elbienamado]

Bibiano wasn’t sure what to think when he first spotted the figure in the distance. So, it had partially been concern that compelled him forward, out of the dunes where he was doing his morning exercises, and into the backshore. The other person could be hurt or maybe upset. And given the events of the last school year, Bibi felt obliged to at least check if whoever was sitting alone on the beach needed help.

As he stepped closer to them, something itched in the back of his mind. The way the person was slouched over themselves reminded him of something, of someone? His eyes traveled up to their oddly familiar dark hair. It wasn't a true brown, technically speaking, but not a true blond either; what was the name Greer had called that hair color? A dirty-blond?

When that thought finishes processing in his head, Bibi blinked at the young man sitting in the sand. A memory of the same person, as a child, hunkered down in the middle of the Morrison’s lavish summer villa popping up in his mind’s eye like a slap in the face.

‘Ah, It’s Eddie,’ He thought belatedly.

Bibiano and Edward had never exactly seen eye-to-eye growing up. As Bibi couldn’t find it in himself to understand the cold indifference the younger man had shown to his twin, Cara. As such, he could help but root for her and conversely against him. It wasn’t as if they ever truly budded heads, though. Since it wasn’t exactly a great look to get into fights with your girlfriend’s little brother; but if Bibi took a special type of joy treating Edward with the same chilly disinterest he had shown his twin, well, that was between Bibi and God.

But things had changed now that Greer was missing and it’s not like Bibi ever truly hated Eddie. Still, he hesitated to call out to the other student. It had been a while since they had last talked as Bibi had been keeping his distance from the twins, uncertain if his presences would be appreciated. Though if he was completely honest to himself, he knew that was partially a lie. He didn’t exactly want to play mediator between the remaining Morrison siblings while still wrestling with the realities of everything that had gone down during the last semester. It was selfish, he knew that, but it wasn’t like he had ever actually been their big brother.

Lost in thought, Bibiano hadn’t realized just how close he had gotten to Edward until the other man turned in surprise. Eddie says something about talking to himself and all that Bibi can do is squint in confusion. ‘Shit, is he actually doing bad mentally right now?’ Bibi thinks, his heart rate increasing.

“Can you run that by me again, Ed?”

✍︎ open starter

Beneath the light grey sky of the early Sunday morning, three dark figures emerge. They soar downward in circles until they disappear behind the mist that fluctuates above the river. The desolate campus beach was the perfect place for an encounter between a man and the witches that haunt him. Outside of his field of vision, the vultures morph into human form – three elderly women clad in dark, thick cloaks –and levitate just above the water eerily, vigilant of Edward's every move, almost as if expecting a prompt to act. His attention divided between the Weird sisters, the sketchbook on his lap, and his iPad, lying unlocked in the sand. "Tell me, thou unknown power-" He recites from memory in a whisper. Still, the words are heavy with the unique energy that only someone who has once portrayed the cursed king himself can conjure. And then he recites the new, updated version which he intends to have in the final script of the game, "Show me the source of your power–" It lacks authenticity, energy... Spirit. "No, that's– That's not it. Um," His tone returns to his regular standard American now, a bit of frustration as he concludes that the scene is not playing out to its fullest potential. He reaches for the notebook and starts sketching the immense demonic figure that now lures over him in an attempt to unclog his brain as if seeing the whole scene play out without dialogue would help him find a voice for his protagonist. "This just feels so... bland." Talking to himself helps sometimes. Almost as if an invisible interlocutor follows him around to pose questions and to find holes in his logic. "Maybe if the–" His heart skips a beat as he notices a real, human shadow stretching over him. Not a malignant creature invoked by his childlike imagination, but an actual person. "Holy shit." A hand reaches for his chest instinctively as though he was about to have a heart attack. He turns to face his unexpected companion, already preparing an apology for the awkwardness of their encounter, "Sorry you caught me talking to myself. I just wanted to hear this dialogue out loud to see if makes sense." And then he chuckles charmingly as if running into someone reciting Macbeth and sketching 20 feet tall demons on a Sunday morning at the beach was the most common thing to ever occur. 

[elbienamado]

Beartown -Fredrik Backman

[elbienamado]

 ironlvngs: with the reactions that link had gotten since the leak from a lot of people close to greer — cara’s stinging the most — he was sort of surprised, when he wasn’t met with a bit more hostility from bibi. it made link think, what was he angle here ? mostly because he couldn’t trust anyone, and the other part was because there was no way he’d have seen that speculation about link and greer and be fine and dandy. but either way, link does continue to play nice. at the end of the day, it wouldn’t hurt to have someone like him on his good side — or as much as he could be, at least. 

“ ah, damn. i knew i might regret skipping out on that. see you next time ? ” though he often can’t stand the likes of SAE, or PIKE, or whatever the fuck the rest were, the initial one second thought of being between them all was kind of fun. well, that’s buried and categorized as a deep and dark fantasy. “ so what’s all this about, then ? ’

Bibiano cringed internally as Link stared him down. He couldn’t tell if it was suspicion in their eyes or something else. It wasn’t that hard for him to guess what they were thinking, considering all the facts, it was strange that the SAE prez hadn’t been more hostile. Bibi hoped Link would take the hint, but was disappointed when they just responded in kind.

Some in the peanut gallery behind him cooed with interest when Link continued suggestively; Bibi shouldn’t be annoyed when he started it but he had hoped his frat brothers would stop and think with their upstairs brain instead of the other one. He turned his head to give them a sharp glare before turning back to to Crawford.

“Nah, it’s cool, we’ll take a rain check instead,” Bibi said, trying to keep his expression neutral, thought he was probably failing tremendously.

He nodded at their question, and motioned to his own oil-slicked body, “Oh, this? Just basic marketing.”

[elbienamado]

To say that Bibi was surprised when Reina grabbed on to his wrist and pulled him into the dance floor would be an understatement; he had been distracted looking for Leaky who’d he lost in the crowd a couple of minutes before. But a smile spread across his face once he recognized her voice.

“Oye, Reina, ¿te das cuenta de quién estás sacando a bailar? ¿Segura que puedes conmigo?” Bibiano asks, Cuban accent thick in his phrasing. He then places a hand over his abdomen and starts with a basic Salsa step. “My mom put me in hella dance classes as a kids so you better watch out, Rei.”

Bibi let out a laugh and slowly begins to move towards her with a simple 8 count, hand extended, “Pero si estás segura, estoy a su servicio.”

STATUS: Closed for @elbienamado WHERE: Spring Fling WHEN: Sometime in the middle of the event

The Spring Fling had been going on for a few hours or so now, Reina had a few (maybe too many) drinks in her but she was enjoying herself. She had spent a lot of time chatting with people who didn't seem already preoccupied and complimenting them on their outfits. The Ogden student body knew had to do two things, throw a party and dress for the occasion. Now she was wandering around, people watching, trying to predict who would be hooking up with who, if those that showed up with a date would be staying with their date.

She grabbed a small plate of finger foods to snack on when suddenly one of her favorite songs came on. She set her plate aside and grabbed the person closest to her - it just so happened to be Bibi. "Come dance with me!" She said in Spanish, smiling as she started to pull him toward the dancing crowd.

[elbienamado]

Bibiano brightened when he spotted Alethea stepping up to the booth. He grinned and waved at them with both hands from where he sat above the cool, dark water. Out of all the people Greer had pulled into their circle after coming to Ogden, Alethea had been one of the few he had ended up truly liking.

“No worries, Ale! Just have fun!” He responded, cupping both hands over his mouth so they could hear his voice better. Bibi watched closely as she threw the first ball but he could tell the angle had been wrong before it flew off to the side of the target.

The next ball was closer to the mark, almost grazing the top of the red circular target. Giving them a sympathetic smile and a double thumbs up, he yelled out to her, “You almost got me that time! Good luck with the next one!”

to call alethea athletic was definitely a stretch. they had terrible hand-eye coordination, and most certainly didn't have a history throwing balls at targets and hitting them. but it seemed like a fun enough time to at least try, she had seen many people take their turns and miss, so it wasn't like they would be singled out and humiliated if they were to miss the target.

stepping up, they gave bibiano and smile and small wave. "i can't promise it's gonna be much of anything. you'll probably stay dry for a while now." they laughed, passing off her tickets and collecting the three balls carefully.

with one toss, the ball flew to the side, and she twisted her lips to the side, trying to figure out the best way correct. "i get two more tries you know." she noted, pointing in his direction before tossing the ball again, this time it going a couple inches above the target. closer, but still not it.

[elbienamado]

throwing up so hard right now

[elbienamado]

Natasha Trethewey, from Thrall: Poems; "Mythology"

[elbienamado]

Rollo May, Man's Search for Himself

[elbienamado]

“The best friends of our childhoods are the loves of our lives, and they break our hearts in worse ways.”

― Fredrik Backman, Us Against You

[elbienamado]

Bibi’s smile widened as Ivy went in for a hug. Laughing he returned the gesture and lifted the shorter woman slightly. “You have no idea how good it is to see you, Flaca. What did you end up doing for Spring Break?” He asked, releasing his childhood friend and pulling away.

He nodded at her response, slightly distracted by the faint smell of weed he had caught on her clothes. Had it been any other friend Bibi might have commented on it but, he knew it was better to just let it go when it came to Ivy. Bibi’d never known her to be someone who would willingly take a lecture from anyone, much less from him of all people.

Bibiano smiled gently as Ivy continued to speak, then he followed her gaze to the top of the Ferris wheel. He was surprised by the wave of painful nostalgia that stirred up in his chest as her words brought up a hazy childhood memory; Bibiano and Surachai on the Times Square Wheel as children. Bibi pointing out various famous locations in the distance as Surachai looked on with wide eyes; their faces pressed against the glass of the gondola as they reach the top.

Snapped back into the present but Ivy’s question, Bibi cringes. He recognized the tone in her voice, it was the same one she’d use when they were pre-teens and she’d caught sight of the fresh bruises Bibi was sporting. Though he appreciated her concern, he most certainly did not want Ivy beefing with ‘Dartboard.’

Bibi grimaced at the thought and then caught himself, trying to school his features and body language into something a little more casual and relaxed.

“Oh? That’s weird, I’ve just been doing, y’know, the usual. Did the dunk tank this year too, so maybe that’s why…?” He let the final question drift off into a laugh that sounded forced to his own ears. Chuckling stiffly, he turned to face the Ferris wheel once more.

"Do you want to get in line?" He asked hoping she wouldn't notice that he was just trying to change the topic.

Ivy gave a small smile when she was greeted by Bibi upon looking up, noticing he seemed a bit jumpy. “Ah, it’s so good to see you!” she said, leaning in for a hug. She had always been a hugger with people she was friendly with, despite seeming like the type of person who would rip your hand off for trying to touch her – which did hold true for anyone she didn’t like. It was nice running into someone she was actually familiar with and liked talking to. “I’m just chilling, been at the carnival for a bit and figured this was the place to be,” she said, gesturing to the ferris wheel they were approaching. “I like the view from up high at night. All the lights and fresh air. Feels like a little escape.”

She shrugged and continued, “so how have you been? You seemed a little… jumpy before. Everything okay?” She was somewhat concerned, as she had always thought Bibi seemed like one of the few ‘good’ people she’s met in her life, and found herself protective over those people. To her, it seemed like good things always happened to the people who didn’t really deserve it, and bad things tended to happen to good people. "What have you been up to here tonight?"

[elbienamado]

[elbienamado]

sun bleached flies — ethel cain

[elbienamado]

it’s unfair how i have the responsibility to heal myself when i didn’t cause my wound in the first place