eldritch-abomination-kill-me

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

Hey, old man is your blog slowing down now?

Don't make me beat the spirit back into the ya

I’m literally just taking one big nap. When I recharge you’ll tell me to shut the fuck up

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

wait u have a gf? how the fuck did you pull

I have many qualities

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

Do you think lemon/lemonade is an adequate name for a grey kitten

No. Name that fucker The Smoke .

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

Jerking off is incest

Sometimes I feel like you guys say things because you're bored

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

The animal shelter announces they are switching things up and letting the pets choose their humans. Your friends got cats and dogs. Your niece got a hamster. What arrived at your doorstep was a bit unconventional.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

The war was a hundred years ago, yet you still find yourself startling easy. Unsecured cargo hitting the inside your hull sounds awfully similar to a boarding vessel. You're about to disregard the sounds when you realize the ship's mass has increased.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

Found memoryless in a forest, you lived for years on a widow’s farm. She tried everything to help you remember. Nothing worked until the day you saw her held at swordpoint, and your true identity came rushing back.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

The teleporter was supposed to be instant. To your horror, as the one in charge of marketing, it is not. Now you have to find a way to sell this 'miracle machine' that slowly reassembles people, bones first.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You've been "trapped" in a "VR" game for years, learnt magic, had a family, etc. But now they've "rescued" you from it all. Waking up on the hospital bed you reflexively cast a shield. Which works.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

"Alright, to complete your entry for Ultimate Robot Fighting, do you accept your robot being "brutally executed" by the opponent if you lose? This is opt-in only and entirely optional, for the sake of the show. If you face an opponent who has opted in, you will be obligated to finish them off."

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

When you died to a vehicle accident, you expected to become an adventurer in a high-fantasy world. Instead, you were a crystal tied to a broken starship, one out of many in a field of barren space. Undeterred, you start to turn the wrecks into a Dungeon, becoming a powerful battleship as well.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You were a child when you wandered into your fathers lab during an experiment. Since then you have been able to see the worlds beyond, and occasionally your father too. Today, as an adult, they are threatening to commit you, so you decide to pull something for the first time.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You were a child when you wandered into your fathers lab during an experiment. Since then you have been able to see the worlds beyond, and occasionally your father too. Today, as an adult, they are threatening to commit you, so you decide to pull something for the first time.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You pretend to be a small-time villain. At worst, you annoy the local supers but your crimes never hurt anyone. All fun and games until things change when a truly sadistic super villain invades your turf and murders a few of the supers. No one has seen the extent of your true powers until now.

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

“QUICK YOU HAVE TO SHOOT THE RIGHT ONE!!!” BANG “sinister chuckle You picked wrong.” “No I didn’t.” “…huh?”

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You scream, seeing a monster in place of your roommate. "Yeah," it says, staring back, "not my best morning."

[eldritch-abomination-kill-me]

You're a psionic who has just been forcefully enrolled in a magic academy because someone saw you using telekinesis. Now you need to pass all the magic classes in order to be considered proficient enough at magic you won't accidentally kill civilians.