elfkingofzaron-blog

[elfkingofzaron-blog]

“That’s so cool,” Kyle murmured in awe, taking one into his hands as Stan voiced his agreement. His fingers traced the blade carefully, reveling in how he was holding an actual katana, before he fixed his grip on it and swung it around a few times, not really mindful of who he had almost hit.

Stan, thankfully enough, had swooped down and scooched Ike away, the Canadian baby babbling, “Sord fight! Sord fight!” as he rolled around the ground, laughing and giggling as Kyle’s SBF sighed in relief before throwing a look in the ushanka wearing boys direction. “Jesus dude, watch where you swing that thing!”

“Sorry!” Kyle apologized immediately before putting it back down, wary. At the shades wearing boy’s words, he raised an eyebrow. “Dude, are you like, from a ninja clan? Nobody logically has this many katanas in one place.” Pause. “... Yeah, I think I can wait for ones with scabbards. Mom will kick my ass if I bring it home like this.”

yard sard || open

You see no absolutely no problem with a posse of kids younger than you wandering around without adult supervision. At least they’re getting outside of the house. At their age, you used to feel that under the strict training of your bro, you were kind of stuck at home most of the time. So you’re not making it any of your goddamn business what kids want to do with their free time. Hell, you don’t even know if it’s supposed to be school time–they could be skipping for all you care.

And it doesn’t strike you as a bad idea to let them handle your old katanas either. Sure, why not. You were swinging them around at a young age yourself. “hell yeah theyre cheap and when i say cheap as in im selling them for cheap. and also theyre pretty fucking cheap lets be real here”

You shrug off the question from the redhead. “i just had them sitting around no big deal” This is true. After you made a few more, they kind of just sit around your apartment like a form of twisted self-inflicted sword trap punishment for procrastinating on your yard sale.

“want to buy some? they dont come with scabbards though because i kinda forgot” You shrug again. It was a different captchalaogue code for making them with scabbards “but if yall wanna wait for a bit i can go grab some since idk theyre cheap but theyll cut you accidentally if youre not paying attention”

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;P It’s definitely not the download rate of all my games, that’s for sure.

Besides the sky you mean?

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Besides the sky you mean?

hi everyone im jade nice to meet you!!

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Heya! I’m Kyle!

hi everyone im jade nice to meet you!!

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Speaking of Michael Jackson taking over my little brother’s body, I don’t remember if we have photos of that occurrence.

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Dude, how the fuck did you not know this?!

Michael Jackson is dead?!

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I haven’t seen so many ‘whasamattadear’ jokes since Clyde tried pulling them on everyone in the second grade.

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We promise to be on our best behavoir, your highness Corrin!

dude dude listen have you ever heard of ‘royal supervision’

we’re at a gala, we have to be behaved; it’s a queen hosting this thing i don’t want to get my ass kicked by a queen. i’m sure your mom will let you guys go when she hears theres a queen

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Well, okay, I guess you’re right. I’ll go call up Stan and Mom.

dude dude listen have you ever heard of ‘royal supervision’

we’re at a gala, we have to be behaved; it’s a queen hosting this thing i don’t want to get my ass kicked by a queen. i’m sure your mom will let you guys go when she hears theres a queen

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Aw dude, of course I wouldn’t bring him! He’d probably ruin it for everybody! And sure, maybe I could ask if Stan wanted to go!

I’d have to ask my mom though. This is pretty serious business - it’s not even in Northedge anymore, dude!

@elfkingofzaron theres a gala you wanna bring your bf along i’m bringing tweek

dont bring the fatass or im kicking you off the boat

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Today was a surprisingly normal day for Kyle Broflovski. He had been tasked with babysitting his little brother - or rather following him around so he didn’t get into trouble - while his parents were out with Stan’s parents, so he, his SBF, and his little brother were walking around aimlessly, mindlessly chatting about anything that came to mind, until Ike made a babbling noise that caught both of their attentions.

“Yard sard,” Stan read out loud, and the two super best friends laughed. “Dude, dude, let’s check it out. Maybe we can get stuff for cheap.”

Kyle nodded, and turned to the teenager who was manning the ‘yard sard’. Truth be told he kind of looked like a prick with the sunglasses he was wearing, but hey, Kyle tried not to judge by appearances until he proved himself, so he nodded in his direction before examining the guy’s whoa holy shit what were those katanas.

“Aw dude, sick, katanas!” Kyle exclaimed. Stan, holding Ike’s tiny hand, hurried over, making sure to keep the katanas out of the baby’s reach before he goggled as well. Kyle knew Craig owned a katana, but Jesus Christ right here in front of them were a lot of katanas. Which all looked suspiciously alike. “Dude, how did you get so many katanas?!” This question was directed at the sunglasses wearing teen, the two ten year olds staring in awe while Ike babbled, “Sod fight! Sod fight!”

yard sard || open

You’re rich. Like, filthy fucking rich. But right now it’s only in boondollars and grist, which funny enough, is not a legitimate currency. You got rich from time travel economy shenanigans (complicated) and leeching off of a friend’s money through a torrenting program (also complicated), but neither is an option you’re willing to entertain at the moment. And since you still don’t really have a high school degree or have anyone to sign off on a worker’s permit, you’re out of a job too.

So you’re selling some old stuff. A bunch of torn and carefully mended puppets, a shitty ironic skateboard that is getting such unreal air that you needed to tie it down like a balloon, a few katanas that you just cloned. Some cherry bombs, copies of Game Bro magazine. SORD. 

Things that any kid had. They were mostly cluttering up your place anyway. All of it in a pile under a sign that had “yard sard” sharpie’d underneath. You sit in a folding chair next to it. The moment you sell out (which you undoubtedly WILL), you’ll just clone everything again for a new stock. It’s the perfect way to convert your current currency into something you can use here.

“hey buy my stuff” You say to the first person to pass you by. “got some really cool stuff here including lemonade since i guess this is that kind of business” You don’t actually have lemonade. If this person calls you out on it, you have some old soda in your fridge that you can toss some yellow food coloring in. Close enough.

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11 & 12!

11) describe your ideal day.

Just being a normal ten year old kid with either all of my friends, or just with my Super Best Friend. Literally. That’s all I ask.

12) dog person or cat person?

I don’t really know. I’ve had experience with both since my SBF Stan has a dog named Sparky and Cartman has a cat named Mr. Kitty. So far only Sparky seems to like me, so I’m gonna have to go with dogs.

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4 and 13?

4.) do you like your name?  is there another name you think would fit you better?

Yeah! And no, I don’t really think so. I’ve already spent at least ten years of my life as Kyle Broflovski that whenever somebody thinks of red hair, green ushanka, and Jewish, they think of me. As they say... it’s just so right for me.

13.) inside or outdoors?

I mean, I definitely like playing outdoors with my friends and doing whatever ten year olds in a redneck town do for fun, but as it is, I’m kind of sickly, so Mom tends to bundle me up unnecessarily, and it’s kinda hard to move sometimes in all the winter wear.

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identity ask.........oh shit

if someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

do you like your name?  is there another name you think would fit you better?

do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing? do you identify yourself by the things you do?

are you religious/spiritual?

do you care about your ethnicity?

what musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime?

are you an artist?

do you have a creed?

describe your ideal day.

dog person or cat person?

inside or outdoors?

are you a musician?

five most influential books over your lifetime.

if you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you’d have turned out the same?

would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”?

what’s your patronus?

which Harry Potter house would you be in? or are you a muggle?

would you rather be in Middle Earth, Narnia, Hogwarts, or somewhere else?

do you love easily?

list the top five things you spend the most time doing, in order.

how often would you want to see your family every year?

have you ever felt like you had a “mind-meld” with someone?

could you live as a hermit?

how would you describe your gender/sexuality?

do you feel like your outside appearance is a fair representation of the “real you”?

on a scale from 1 to 10, how hard is it for someone to get under your skin?

three songs that you connect with right now.

pick one of your favorite quotes.

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