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Favored Myself with a Self-Date

📌 Went to the Salon and had my hair trimmed.I still love the previous cut I had from my favorite hairstylist in CDO but sadly, that salon was closed. But having a cut no matter how the style looked like is better than keeping dead hair and split ends. 📌 Bought myself an iced coffee and some ramenSa sigeg ramen, I can already tell what product I’m having. 😂 This one is mild Jin Ramen with Eden…

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Get a Word

Today’s message during the 9 AM Service is “Get a Word!” Looking back on what happened this year, I realized I received so much from the Lord. And I just want to share 20 things I got from the Lord this year. “COME!” He said. – Matthew 14:29 The ocean is scary and overwhelming but be a wet water-walker than a dry boat-rider. God’s next big thing is out there, out of your comfort zone. “SEEK…

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It Ends Here

11.29.23 Wednesday. Today’s class was remarkable. A phenomenon that nobody saw coming just happened. It came to us as a surprise but for the leaders that were there, it was predetermined. School of the Spirit was moved to the last session that day. We were getting ready for our class, which was expected to start at 8:30 AM when we noticed that our teacher brought a lot of backups. When I say…

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You Bloom Differently When You're Loved

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Thoughts of Depression

Sometimes the world seems so big that it makes me feel so small, that hiding from giants is like hiding in a roofless house. Sometimes it becomes so small that I feel like I just don’t fit in, that running away is like running in circles. Sometimes it’s suffocating … and I feel like dying, and in the middle of the battle, I’m unsure whether I want to survive or see the light. I look to…

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Dear Ma, Happy Birthday!

Ma, I may not remember how old you would have been today but I surely won’t forget that today could have been another wonderful celebration. I am amazed how you could always bring this whole family together. You’re truly a sunshine, Ma. And that is something I cannot do for this fam. I guess I’m too scarred to carry this family. I’m sorry, Ma. I’m just not you.

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Dear Mama, It's My Birthday Today

Dear Mama, It’s My Birthday Today

Year 2020 was your last birthday call. I had to scroll back so just I could check if you had any birthday greeting for me. You never had. You just call me whenever we could because we were both very busy then. And you’re not just that person who is into words though. I remember celebrating my birthday in the middle of your wake and I had to buy myself a birthday cake because nobody else will…

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Dear Mama, We Remember You

Even in your death, you pulled us together, Ma. You’re gone but it feels like you’re just taking a vacation somewhere far. And look, Ma! Our fam has become bigger. JR has finally found a girlfriend, Donna. Peter brought Khatlyn. Even Jeric and Kim with their baby Nana were present. Jerico is single again, by the way. For the first time, Mac and Jc came with Aunt Gilda. If you were here, you…

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Dear Mama, I Can't Sleep

Dear Mama, I Can’t Sleep

I remember, one time you called me and nagged at me saying, “Nganong mata pa man ka? Gabii naman. Nag bilar nasad ka.” Then I would crinkle my eyebrows and answer, “Hala kay nanawag ka diba? So mata gyud ko.” Then you would laugh. I miss our silly fights, Ma. I still wish everything was just a nightmare. Don’t worry, Ma. As I remember you tonight, I won’t be crying. I just miss you. That’s…

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Dear Mama, We've Got Another Baby

Dear Mama, We’ve Got Another Baby

Kim, Jeric’s partner, gave birth today. I could imagine how your reaction will be. You would put a wide smile on your face, wider than the one in the photo, and then you would say, “Halaaa! Kadungan sila ug birthday ni JR?” (Oh my! The baby has the same birthday as JR.) Oh, you would then celebrate that Jeric’s baby is a girl. You would be cheering that, finally, more and more ladies are being…

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09.18.22

those days At this hour, it’s 10 PM in Riyadh. You would call me then, sometimes while you’re on your shift, hiding in one of the empty rooms. Then I would nag at you for using your phone while working and then you would tell me that it’s okay because you didn’t have much work to do and you’re really bored that’s why you called. Sometimes you’re home. You would call me while eating a bar of…

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How sad it is to be literally and figuratively alone. To feel all the pain and loneliness at 3AM. When I can’t think of anyone to call at this hour, I can’t help but think I have no one. I am at my ugliest, darkest, heaviest, and most confounding moment. And it is when I am my weakest and most sensitive self that it’s so hard to break down to just anyone unless I’m sure that, that person is a…

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Dear Self

To be lost and found over and over again Dear Self, Remind yourself how on fire you are right now, how the Word of God refreshed your soul and reset your mind, how your Spirit was awaken from sleeping, and how excited you are to move mountains, shake the earth, and transform lives. This is what you are called to do after all. But know that you might come back to being in a plateau again, get…

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LifeCon Day2

second day ×××LC2022D2 On the first morning of LC2022, the speaker asked, “Who is your king? Who sits in the throne of your heart?” I was quick to answer under my breath, “Jesus, of course”, not until he suggested, “Is it your self?”. I paused. And thought. My self? Dominating my heart? Could be. I mean, it isn’t impossible that my journey to self-love have come down to the road of…

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LifeCon 2022 Day 1

Perspective at the Balcony ×××LC2022D1 First day of the conference was an adventure at Alabang Zapote Road as we got lost our way looking for our destination. We arrived late enough to miss seats close to the stage so we have to go up and stay at the balcony instead. Worship began. The crowd downstairs was very hyped. It looked fun. But I didn’t feel like joining the jam. I closed my eyes…

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I Am Still Here

××× 12 years in the Teaching Ministry, from a volunteer who doesn’t know a thing about the Bible to becoming the Ministry Head. I’ve seen many faces, been under different heads, served with volunteers who come and go, witnessed toddler babies becoming kuyas and ates… 12 years and I’m still here. Once, someone asked me, “Ate, ngano nagstay paka bisag ikaw na lang isa?” I’d be lying if I said I…

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If Multiverse Was True

If multiverse is true, I wish my other me is super rich, has millions in the bank, owns a penthouse, drives a fancy car, travels on a private plane, goes to any country anytime I feel like, buys all yummy food, fancy clothes, and branded shoes, aaaand writes for a living. What a dream! I don’t mind being single for life only if I live so comfortably as how I imagine.