embelom7

[embelom7]

thinking about my of tears and time and did a (bad) rough sketch of something from it,,, augh,,, it originally started as a swap au, but it grew into something more the more i thought about it!! also has some inspiration taken from the lovely overkill au with some aspects!! </3 but the hope is to turn into an askblog one day once i plan out more stuff abt the story!! lots of more info about some context for this scene under the cut!!

sif and mira's relationship is!! a bit strained at the start!! as the change god's "chosen" one's self-appointed bodyguard, siffrin has... a lot of mixed feelings about the change god and its beliefs after meeting the deity face-to-face! they hold a LOT of resentment to CG for making bonnie, a literal CHILD, the so-called "chosen one" to save the country, which more or less carried over to mira when she joined the party. he doesn't trust her; half of it is because of his already skittish and distrusting nature and the other half is because he's worried mira was going to take advantage of bonnie being blessed by the CG for her own intentions. it really doesn't help that when mira first joined the party, she would ask bonnie a LOT of questions about the CG, how they got blessed, etc etc, which made siffrin have to step in on mira's end, she doesn't mean any harm, of course!! she was just initially very excited and genuinely intrigued because the CG isn't, well, known for directly involving themselves in anything, nevertheless SHOWING themselves to anyone!! she soon stops her questions, though, after sif stepped in and upon realizing bonnie really,,, doesn't know anything about this either, and that she shouldn't be overwhelming a kid with this; they don't know why they got chosen, either. she was VERY apologetic about it!! but she still noticed that sif would?? never really talk to her, he'd brush her off, and she could sometimes feel them staring directly at her, as if analyzing her, which!! made her pretty anxious. she doesn't want to be on sif's bad side; she genuinely wants to be friends with him, but they're very cold and aloof to her (more so than to anyone else), and eventually during their travels, it got to the point where she couldn't really!! take it anymore!! hence the confrontation they had a long, long talk about it, and upon getting to know mira a bit better through it and realizing that she did not, in fact, have ANY nefarious intentions, they!! are very embarrassed to say the least. and while their relationship w/ mira is much better than it was before because of the communication, they!! are still haunted by this moment and how they allowed themselves to get into their own head SO MUCH and jumped to conclusions because of his overthinking. makes him cringe every time he thinks abt it LMAO essentially this au's version of the "this is the happiest i've ever been" memory with mirabelle in the OG game!!

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i forgot ive been wanting to post these, but!! prom doodles from roughly a month ago of my bf and i as isafrin (ft one of our mutual friends as odile LMAO) based on the interactions we had!! he's very isabeau coded (in the best way possible)(im very unapologetically gushy about him)

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happy pride!! made a new pfp for myself with my futurefrin giggles!! alts of the pfp i made are under the cut!!

[embelom7]

It would be really funny if Loop joked about technically being the creator of the current time line, actually.

"Stardust I fucking made you and I will UNmake you." would be so fucking funny???

Or-

"Loop this sucks."

"So?"

"You made this timeline, do something about it."

"No."

"SO ALL GODS ARE JUST LAZY?!?"

"Yes, actually."

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This is entirely self indulgent and I haven't even gotten to the indulging part yet.

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FLASHING IMAGES WARNING? ACT 4-5 SPOILERS

trunk siffrin

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⋆⭒˚.⋆Quand le Directeur n'est pas là ( les acteurs dansent )⋆.˚⭒⋆

> ACT 5 [ it's over. ]

Loop says they try not to look the Fighter's way, and that he's never going to see them anyway, so it doesn't matter. Well... What happens when he does look their way?

First | Previous | [ The curtains have closed. ]

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sometimes i love having so many aus of isat because i just imagine a little group of them watching some of the other aus in horror (they bring popcorn and snacks)

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friend i got into isat and i had yet another lovely conversation about the blorbos

loop youre a mod!!!!! you gotta ban the misbehaving chatters!!! (siffrins intrusive and self loathing thoughts)

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did a little ISAT text box thing of one of our convos using the dialogue maker by kongkrog!! we got to the "beauty alliance" vs "opposite ends of the age spectrum alliance" bit when we were on the phone the other day, and i was loop LMAO she DID choose the beauty alliance though because, and i quote, "isabeau and mirabelle are my ride or dies"

one of my best friends just bought and started playing isat (much to my joy and whimsy)(thankfully somehow i havent given her spoilers on what happens despite my HEAVY obsession with it) and i LOVE giggling deviously to myself as she shares her theories and thoughts with me

im just so joyous that i have someone else to talk to about this stupid little game i love so dearly 😭

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i really love how intensely Mirabelle reacts to act 5 Siffrin botched friendquest.

Isabeau is mostly operating out of concern and, eventually, hurt. he already knows something’s up before Siffrin gets to him. he knows something truly awful must be wrong for Siffrin to be lashing out like they are, and as soon as he can’t handle the situation anymore, he leaves and asks (with strained cheer) for time apart to cool off.

most of Bonnie’s anger comes from being upset and afraid that Siffrin would willingly put themself in danger for no reason, when that’s exactly why they’ve been so unsettled since the eye incident. they hate that Siffrin values their own life so little, they hate that they’re the cause of any pain or loss for him, and here he is, putting himself in that situation AGAIN. on purpose. it’s loud and explosive, but it’s familiar, too, being “hated” by Bonnie for this reason.

Odile pushes, and keeps pushing, until her concern overwhelms Siffrin and they strike where they know she’s most vulnerable. she gets physical, just for a moment, grabbing his collar before controlling herself and letting go. her fury shuts down into cold detachment, and she walks away.

but Mirabelle—dear, sweet, gentle, loving Mirabelle, “the most wonderful being on earth,” with her secret “ruthless side” that largely involves lightly badmouthing people behind their backs and then apologizing—slaps them. immediately.

and then COMPLETELY RENOUNCES THEIR FRIENDSHIP.

not just “we’re not friends anymore,” but “we were never friends in the first place.”

that’s!!! pretty extreme!!!!

of course, she ALSO starts by asking what’s wrong. something must have happened for him to act like this. but as soon as Siffrin brushes her off, she jumps past that line of questioning and dives headfirst into re-evaluating everything she thought she knew about them as a a person.

if he could say something like that to her and not see anything wrong with it, then she was wrong to treat him as a friend, wrong to read camaraderie into his teasing, wrong to think they must care about them all under their aloof demeanor.

that’s how Mirabelle phrases it—“I was wrong about you”—but i think that there’s a hidden layer of I was right about you, too.

she talks about the way they tease her like she had to convince herself that he was doing it in a friendly way. she says they talk like they “know better than her” like that’s a thought she’s had for a LONG time.

“Always soooo mysterious, Siffrin, always talking as if you're better than me! As if you know me!!! But you don't, Siffrin!!! You're just as lost and useless as I am!!! So stop!!! Talking!!! As if you know me!!!!!!”

none of this comes across as a new, sudden way to view Siffrin for her. it doesn’t shock or confuse her. it makes her angry, defensive, almost like she was waiting for something like this to happen at some point. the feeling of resentment, frustration, jealousy, being patronized and condescended to—this is something she’s been actively pushing down and rejecting this entire time, but they’ve given her ample reason for it all to boil to the surface. violently.

Mirabelle’s kindness is not inherent or easy. it’s a choice she’s making. she treats Siffrin warmly because she gives him the benefit of the doubt—refusing to act based on anxiety-fueled, cynical speculation, and reassuring herself that his actions are driven by care and friendship even if she can’t quite see it.

“I was wrong about you” doesn’t mean she always and without question believed them to be a fundamentally kind, caring person from the beginning—it’s that her first, colder instincts were right, and she was wrong to convince herself otherwise.

never mind that she asked what was wrong at first. she barely gives them time to speak in their own defense, to explain what they really meant by what they said. all of her suppressed doubts and frustrations are getting aired out now, now that all the trust she’d so deliberately placed in him has been betrayed. her pain feels bigger than this singular moment, so when she hurts him back, she makes sure it extends back through the entirety of their relationship for him, too.

“You're awful. You're not my friend, not my ally, not anything. You never were.”

like the others, she goes back to the clocktower and tells Siffrin not to come back until later. but there’s a finality to the way she ends this confrontation that isn’t quite there with the others. Isabeau and Odile reach their breaking point and remove themselves from the situation, asking for space to cool off but still somewhat leaving the door open for Siffrin to tell them what’s really going on at some point. Mirabelle is the only one who tries to fully cut ties��after everything else she says, her “I don’t want to see you until tonight” reads to me somewhat as “I don’t want to see you anymore unless I have to.”

I can’t wait to never see you again.

even back at the clocktower, Mirabelle doesn’t really defend Siffrin’s place in the party when Odile suggests leaving them behind out of concern for their trustworthiness on the most important day of the journey. Isabeau and Bonnie protest out of sentimentality and faith in Siffrin’s abilities and connection to them, and Mirabelle agrees, but…

“I agree, but... B-But would he even agree to come with us, still? Maybe they won't even come back tonight...”

she doesn’t say much outside of that. maybe the stutter and hesitation here are signs of regret about how things happened, but she lacks Isabeau and Bonnie’s confidence that Siffrin even wants to come back to them in the first place. she doesn’t trust that their bond was real anymore. maybe it never was in the first place, or maybe she broke whatever was there herself.

and she’s still mad when they finally catch up to Siffrin at the King! and she makes sure Siffrin knows that—after saving them, assuring him that he no longer needs to fight, that they’re all there for him. she still cares, of course she still cares—she’s still hurt, too, but they can figure that part out once there’s less world-ending stuff going on.

she’s the first to say that they all reserve the right to still be angry at Siffrin later—and that they’ve already forgiven him.

she’s also the first to say we want to stay with you, too. it’s not just you.

she was wrong! she thought they didn’t care but they care so much, it’s overwhelming, it’s world-ending.

i think she’s gonna be wallowing in guilt post-canon the moment she remembers what she said and did TO SIFFRIN and not just what Siffrin said to her. especially now that she knows Siffrin’s exact hangups, and especially especially if she figures out what Siffrin was trying to say.

they put themself through hell out of loneliness and fear that none of the others cared about him the way he cared about them, he was going insane from repetition and exhaustion and hunger and trying to keep them all safe and together, and all they did in the midst of all that was say something kind of mean to her one time (that turned out to not even be MEANT to be mean it was supposed to be HELPFUL they just SAID IT ALL WRONG) and she SLAPPED THEM? and told him that they WEREN’T FRIENDS AT ALL??? how could she!!! she should have known better!! what they said hurt a lot but still!!!

so when they eventually manage to try to talk about it, they end up almost in, like, a guilt competition.

Mirabelle apologizing for how she reacted, that she shouldn’t have yelled or hit him, that she doesn’t want to be the kind of person who acts that way out of anger and she’s sorry that she made Siffrin expect that reaction from her, she should have known better and believed in him more and they only messed up like that because they were losing their mind in a time loop but what’s HER excuse—

and Siffrin going nononono stop I deserved it—(HUH DON’T SAY THAT NO YOU DIDN’T)—and that he should never have said such awful things to her, ever, and she was under so much pressure already with the weight of the country and everyone’s lives and futures and her religion and their whole party counting on her to do this impossible task because she’s the only one who can, all this unbearable expectation and hope crushing her, and they KNEW that but they thought they could skip to the ending as though her feelings didn’t matter at all, like helping her wasn’t as important as saving a little time—

until they’re just. in tears together, apologizing for all the horrible things they did in between complimenting each other’s strength and kindness and resilience and how much they admire each other and saying that no, everything you did was completely understandable, actually, the only one who sucks here is me. which neither of them will accept coming from the other!!

they’re so similar, in ways they couldn’t really understand, before.

warm, affectionate, perfect Mirabelle, the resolute hero, a beacon of compassion and hope for all those around her, who wears her heart on her sleeve, her fear making her courage shine all the brighter—nothing like the insignificant, forgettable Siffrin, too terrified to be known, too fragile to touch, too selfish and disgusting to bear letting go.

cool, mysterious, unflappable Siffrin, the worldly traveler, as charming and silly as they are confident and skilled, who brushed off losing an eye like it was nothing, accepting the risks of this journey with barely more than a shrug—nothing like the anxious, stagnant, undeserving Mirabelle, a fraud and a nobody crumbling under the weight of a mission too important to be entrusted to someone like her, doubting herself, doubting her friends, doubting her mentor, doubting her faith, too weak and brittle to bend and change the way the world needs her to without breaking.

not worth bothering others with their problems. they should be able to handle this alone. stay positive, stay calm. breathe in, and out.

they’ll struggle with it, still—the hiding, the minimizing—but now, they understand each other a little better. they can hold each other accountable for what they leave unsaid.

it’ll get easier, eventually. they have plenty of time.

[embelom7]

one of my best friends just bought and started playing isat (much to my joy and whimsy)(thankfully somehow i havent given her spoilers on what happens despite my HEAVY obsession with it) and i LOVE giggling deviously to myself as she shares her theories and thoughts with me

im just so joyous that i have someone else to talk to about this stupid little game i love so dearly 😭

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greetings isat tumblr,, for my first offering i give to you another doodle of loops sweep!!!

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The time we got Détresse 4 times in a row and the beginning of a very long standing inside joke

Mirabelle- @shininglife (any pronouns)

Siffrin- @senroak (bot/it/she)

Odile- me :3 (any pronouns)

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SIFFRIN SIFFRIN SIFFRIN SIFFRIN PLEASE GOD

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Out of Touch

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Some isafrin tomfoolery while I animate something.... Fun.... For the isat enjoyers :3