emeraldphnx

[emeraldphnx]

Mungkin memang aku yang kurang berterimakasih dan berkata-kata indah.

Sehingga hidup tidak lagi menoleh padaku.

Hidup.

Apa aku bisa tanpa hidup?

Kemudian, apa mati?

Kurasa hidup tak membuangku.

Hanya mengacuhkanku sampai ku ingin mengakhiri hidup.

Hidup.

Apa aku tanpa hidup?

Mayat yang bernafas.

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Hidup ingin aku untuk melompat.

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Aku membayangkan diriku berteriak melepas kemarahan sembari memaki pada kebodohanku sendiri di sebuah balkon tak berpintu di pinggir tebing.

Marah. Kecewa. Seolah-olah dunia tak memberi pilihan lain untuk keluar dari balkon itu kecuali dengan cara melompat ke jurang dari balkon tepi tebing itu.

Persegi panjang, yang kubayangkan. Teralis hitam kelam tanpa aksen. Tinggi sepinggang yang tentu saja membuatnya sangat mudah untuk dilompati.

Aku tak ingin melompat.

Aku gak mau, sungguh.

Tapi aku lelah.

Tidak, tidak lelah.

Aku frustasi.

Aku frustasi karena terus-terusan berdebat dengan hidup.

Tak ingin kalah egois agar hidup menuruti keinginanku. Mauku.

Hidup? Tentu saja acuh.

Mana peduli.

Tanpaku, hidup akan terus berjalan.

Aku, yang kecewa dan sampai pasrah tentang harus menangis, memilih tidak menangis lagi.

Memilih menerima diri,

tentang kapan harus melompat dari tepi balkon itu.

Karena, hidup tak memberi sedikitpun pengertian dan kelembutannya.

Mungkin itu yang diinginkan hidup.

Mungkin hidup memang ingin aku melompat.

Mungkin memang aku harus melompat. 1

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I miss u V!

[emeraldphnx]

Instagram: abookandadream

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My latest travel sketches at Florence, Italy. Done in a Stillman & Birn gamma pocketbook with Cotman watercolors and a sepia Pitt marker

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Haim cover Shania Twain ‘That Don’t Impress Me Much’ for Like A Version

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Hi. I miss you.

I wrote this with smile. Finally. I get back to see you again.

It's been several years.

Now I'm a mother of toddler.

Rockhead wife of a "I don't wanna hear it" husband hahahahah.

Nice to see you again.

See ya.

Dear no one,

I’m gave birth. I marry Darcy. I am a living Bridget Jones.

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Still,

Not really a happy ending for me.

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Dear no one,

I'm gave birth. I marry Darcy. I am a living Bridget Jones.

[emeraldphnx]

Incredibly saddened by the scenes of Notre Dame burning. The cathedral has stood and survived so many centuries, serving as a backdrop for innumerable significant moments in French history. Despite knowing the continuous labor necessary to keep such an old structure functional it is easy to take Notre Dame’s continued presence for granted. Twelve years ago, I took my first trip across the Atlantic to the city I’d longed to see most since I was a child, Paris. Walking down the Seine and seeing Notre Dame for the first time remains such a vivid memory. For over a decade this place had only existed for me in images and history books, and now, here it was, in all its towering glory. No longer a flat, still photo I could grasp in my hands but a stone behemoth rising over the city. 

This is not the first time Notre Dame has suffered or even burned. Eight centuries cannot pass without leaving scars. No matter the damage everything can be rebuilt, and we have records of artifacts that will not survive. Firefighters are attempting to remove as many items as possible. Several statues had already been removed for restoration. As of posting no one has been wounded or killed for which we should all be grateful. Hopefully, this will be an event future visitors learn about a few centuries from now when they visit the cathedral, the restoration serving as yet another testament to Notre Dame’s enduring legacy in Paris.

(Image: Map of Paris c. 1615)  

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Astronomical Clock, Prague 

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Saat Malvi ngirim gua foto ini dan gua jadi mengidam ngidamkan kopi hangat.. tetiba penampakan minuman ini muncul di layar hp gua...... Oh Tuhan. Godaan macam apa ini :') padahal main hp pun, pandanganku berbayang-bayang~

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Detik barusan, mbeeer bikin ngakak. Dengan jawaban jawabannya yang nyeleneh wkwk. Btw. Iya. Pingin ngeask juga ke Mbeeer, kapan gua jodoh sama Jefri Nichol~ tapi ingat dulu doi pernah muji foto gua sampe ngepm, rasanya jadi tak perlu. And I love this castle gif wkwkwk 👊