emileber

[emileber]

just letting everyone know this post has been cooking for 7 years and it'll finally post in 2028

its so old that when i click edit the corners of the boxes are still sharp

[emileber]

im a fucking sucker for the “character gets so badly injured that they can’t think clearly and start calling for help in a distressingly vulnerable way.” characters who start using nicknames for their friends they haven’t used since they were kids. characters who start begging for their brother they haven’t seen in years to be there. characters who would usually use their parents’ names or call them mother/father/etc crying out mama when they go down. u understand.

[emileber]

the funny thing about socializing cats at the animal shelter is that it can sometimes be quite difficult to tell the difference between a cat who's very scared, but unwilling to move or hiss, and will strike or bite if you touch them, and a cat who's a little scared and unwilling to move, but doesn't mind being touched. which means that sometimes I go through the whole process of acclimating a cat to my hand being in their kennel, getting them used to my hand as a moving object, slowly making my way closer and closer to them, testing which angles of approach bother them the least, and eventually making contact, only for the cat to look at me like "thanks for finally petting me. are you stupid or something?"

[emileber]

btw if you're bored as an artist you should try learning to draw fat and skin folds, it genuinely is really fun once you get into it.

[emileber]

i am a tragedy enjoyer before i am human

[emileber]

I'm going to *remembers suicide jokes are detrimental to my mental health* quit my job and start making shoes for American Girl Dolls

[emileber]

Oh, so that's why everyone was suddenly talking about homestuck again

[emileber]

[emileber]

i think the concept of a software install wizard is so cute… developers know the average person isnt comfortable running terminal commands so theyre like here!!! this wizard will do it for you <3 and we’re all like yay :) the wizard

[emileber]

REMEMBER:

if you don't understand the post at a glance it's because op wrote it wrong and needs your help

if the post doesn't contain all the contextualising information you need to understand it, op is gaslighting you

if you haven't experienced the phenomenon the post describes, op is making it up for clout

if you haven't encountered the type of person the post describes, they're a strawman that doesn't exist

if the post doesn't address a topic you'd prefer to talk about, it's a distraction, missing the point, and talking over you

if the post makes a good point, it is your duty to contribute to human enlightenment by nitpicking it to be more correct

and most importantly:

every online conversation is a competition and you must win

[emileber]

i think the reason "fiction affects reality" trips so many people up is because they think it means "engaging with media that depicts uncomfortable subjects will taint your soul" when really all it means is that "fiction is meant to reflect certain ideas of the world intentionally or not, and it's going affect your perception of it, if you don't go in with a healthy bit of skepticism"

[emileber]

[emileber]

i told my friend’s dad that he was hot (it was in context with the conversation, he was complaining that he was feeling old, etc), and he said a very genuine thank you and the conversation moved on to other topic, my friend was now talking about something else entirely when his dad goes

“i think if i were born in your generation i might have been bisexual”

and friend got kinda mad at me lmao

[emileber]

[emileber]

grandma burger desperation

[emileber]

MORE

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[emileber]

so I had a new roommate move in less than a week ago

…and this morning I discovered a really fun way to learn that he stores things in the oven 🩷

I guess this makes sense except for the fact that his cabinets????

are empty?????????????

(the food there was left behind by the last roommates)

PLUS

as far as I know, this is the only plate he brought 🥸 just the one.

anyway happy carcinogen wednesday I guess!!!!