enigmaticdamned

[enigmaticdamned]

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. 𝐈𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐢𝐝𝐨𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐈 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲.

There’s no greater betrayal than the one that comes from someone who shares the same blood as you in their veins. The one who creates you. A father. Noel Maher. I wish I could remember him for what he pretended to be. The man with a smile like a palette of warmth, a sunlit mirage that masked the colder currents beneath the surface. A man who kept himself up in the latest fashions. A true wolf in sheep’s clothing. The best business man. There wasn’t a deal that he couldn’t make. I wanted to remember him for all the things I admired him for. Instead I remember him as the man who stood over me with a blade in my chest. He meant to kill his only living son and that didn’t matter to him. He didn’t even care for what got us there either.

𝐅 𝐋 𝐀 𝐒 𝐇 ��� 𝐀 𝐂 𝐊

“I don’t want him apart of this. You promised you would be good for him and that he could be good!” My mother shouted at my father. I can hear them in his study. I suspect they are unaware of my presence or that I’d be coming by this late. “My patience has run thin, Roselyn! Our son will do what I tell him. I ask of nothing from no one except to fall in line with no exceptions.” His response to her was cold and careless. I never heard him speak to her in that manner when I was around. I could hear her storm off, swinging open his office door. I stayed hidden behind the corner, keeping my presence discreet. “You know. . . for years I stood by and turned a blind eye to all the blood you shed. I looked at you and pretended you were an angel when I knew you were the devil. You begged me to have our son and you promised me you wouldn’t do this to him. I could turn a blind eye to everything but I won’t with this! I will do everything in my power to stop you!” She finally walked away, descending the stairs and he got up to follow her. “You dare?” He asked her but she ignored him. I slipped out the back door, figuring I’d go home that night and give them some air. I wondered what my mom knew and why she was so adamant to stop him.

I went to sleep that night thinking I’d wake up and start unraveling this mystery at dawn. Instead I was disturbed not even two hours later by a phone call from the hospital. “Mr. Maher, your mother is in the ICU and her condition is critical.” For a second I spaced out and all I could hear was the pounding of the beating organ in my chest. My world crumbling around me. This doesn’t feel coincidental. Did my father hurt my mother?

I hung up before I could get the full details from the doctor. I heard something along the lines of her slitting her own wrists and I knew it in my soul that was furthest from the truth. In a panic I rushed out of the bed, grabbing the clothes I had just taken off to shove them back on. I snatched my keys from my dresser and then I headed to my black Audi to race back to my parents place. I skipped stop signs and stoplights, driving almost 80 miles per hour to get to him.

I will unveil the truth. I don’t think he will look me in the eye and tell a lie.

When I arrived I hopped out my car without even removing the keys or closing the door behind me. I was nothing but rage that needed to be purged on him. What could be more important than the bond between family? If you can’t trust family then who could you trust?

I walked inside the house and I looked around for him. I started with his office but he wasn’t there. I looked everywhere until I successfully found him in the backyard sitting by the pool with a glass of whisky in his hand. It was almost like he was celebrating something. I wasted no time as I approach.

“What the fuck did you do to her?”

Enraged I asked him, knocking the glass out his hand and it shattered on the ground. He looked up at me. “What is this about, Nolan?” he asked nonchalantly. He isn’t even pretending to be upset or show any remorse. Is this the monster I looked up too? Is this the moment I see him in his real skin. The truth that had been veiled in the smoke and mirrors of affection, cloaked by the tender illusions of our shared vulnerability.

“I heard you two arguing last night! I was there! I thought I’d leave to give you both some air but—” I couldn’t get my words out because he cut right in “So then you heard enough to know she was threatening my empire. A means to a very tragic end don’t you think?” He spoke of my mother like she was nothing but some outsider threatening his stupid fucking empire! I wanted to break him down for it. “You coward! She is my mother! Your wife! Does that not mean anything to you? Is expanding your empire everything?” I reached down my fingers ruffling up his shirt to grip him by his collar. I raised a fist to strike him but he catches me by the wrist and he said “You like your life don’t you, Nolan? The fancy cars you drive and your penthouses! You wouldn’t have all that if it weren’t for me! I sit back and make all the hard decisions while you and Roselyn enjoy the luxuries!” He stands up to push me off of him. I shake my head in disgust. I’m filled with regret that I ever looked to him as someone I wanted to be like. All the things I did to impress him. I was truly foolish in the end.

I have so much love for him that it makes me ache. It makes me angry and for so long it trapped me like an animal in a cage.

“Fuck you and your empire! I’m going to take it all from under you and make you watch it burn down! You aren’t my father! You are nothing to me, Noel Maher!” For the first time I felt free saying those words. Like the cage I was in had opened.

In my father’s eyes flashed a devil that I never seen before. “It’s a real shame. I thought you’d take after me instead of your pathetic mother.” Blinded by my rage I didn’t see the sharp thick blade that he lunged forward right into my chest cavity. I looked up at him in disbelief, feeling real betrayal for the first time in my life. Not from an enemy nor a friend but my own father. In that moment I learned blood spills blood. So if I can’t trust family then I can’t trust anyone. “You…how could you?” The only words I could force out. The pain of the blade was crippling as he sticks it deeper. Each breath I take I could feel the air getting shorter. With the little strength I had I tried to push him off and he shoved me to the ground like I was light as a feather. “I watched all the footage from my cameras last night and I knew you were here! I figured you’d come back and come to your senses about all this but I realize you could never take after me! You disgust me!” He spoke down to me as he tried to press his foot down on the blade to push it deeper. Treating me like scum beneath his shoes. Hovering over me like he was a god that gets to decide the fate of my life. I reached up to catch his foot, trying to relieve myself of the pain and stop the deadly blade from pushing deeper into me.

“𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙙𝙤𝙜 𝙚𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙜 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙. 𝙎𝙤𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙’𝙫𝙚 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧.”

𝐏 𝐑 𝐄 𝐒 𝐄 𝐍 𝐓

Those were the last words of his that I remembered as the darkness swept me away and I drifted into unconsciousness. It has been seven years since it happened. The scar on my chest is a reminder of how lucky I was to escape deaths embrace.

Today marks the anniversary of my mother’s death and I feel I don’t deserve to mourn her. I am out of Noel’s clutches completely but he is still out there and we are at war with one another. I have my own position of power now which makes me untouchable but he is still a powerful man himself which makes it even harder to get to him.

This mark on my chest feels more like a reminder that I failed to get my revenge as long as he still lives.

I stand on my patio, gazing out at the beautiful view the penthouse had to offer. I couldn’t properly enjoy it thinking about Noel. I’m reminded of how my mother said he begged her to have me. I often questioned why he wanted me. To have a child without intention to love them. I was only here to be molded in his image. He didn’t want me to live my own life. He wanted to live through me in the worst way.