ephemeralove

[ephemeralove]

He steps into the flowering corpse of the greenhouse as if the earth itself is his home, a noble name and title on the tip of his tongue. Yet instead of a barrier to pristinely separate himself from the dirt, he wields it as one might wield a spade: piercing unflinchingly into the soil, in search of the life within only waiting to be brought to bloom.

"I, I..." Katarina founders for a moment, swept into his talkative energy without the words to buoy herself. "I never... visited myself, but... I heard it was a beautiful place... where they conserved many plants." It served almost as a living record, from what she had heard; the plants there would thrive even as nature was tilled into civilization -- a glass display of so much medicine and history...

...in other words, a source of life, and their responsibility; he is right.

"My name is Katarina." She answers his introduction with one of her own, as well as the slight and stilted bow of a knight. There is much work to be done, and yet the tactician finds herself fascinated by how quickly he plants himself within the work. He is unflinching, unabashed, unafraid -- all the things that cut through her when gold settles upon a gray and ghastly facsimile of silver.

This time she finds not even words to answer him, all of them dry and dying in her throat. He had needed only as many words as minutes he had known her to know that which held her in place. How can he so confidently say that it isn't destruction that blooms her? There is fire seared upon her hand, and she holds it hesitantly over her heart.

"...I've never been good at it," Katarina replies, so softly that even the flowers and leaves might strain to hear her. She had failed Kleine, and failed the boy who used to be Roro; she had failed the knight who believed she could be saved and the king who chose not to bury her. "...I, um..."

But they -- some of them, at least, bites back a bloodied heart -- believe in her. Each movement is ungainly and uncertain, but slowly, so very slowly, she kneels beside him in the dirt, eyes settled on a bold blue flower.

"T... tell me if I do something wrong. I... I want to learn."

for all who come to find

->RESTORATION: +1 Gauntlets

[ephemeralove]

He sighs, and so does she, a quiet thing that slips out in agreement as she vaguely inclines her head. Katarina does not blame them overmuch -- she cannot even begin to fathom the scale of destruction and chaos to be sifted through, let alone how they must have rushed the organization simply to start -- but proceeding with a tangled start so rarely smooths it out.

"...It must have been chaotic," she murmurs, a gentle agreement, one without scorn. Part of her wonders if they had hoped the people further down the line would be able to untangle the knots. A faulty agreement, but tragedy had never known a perfect plan. Her fingers straighten out the creases of the paper in silent contemplation, and just as silent acceptance. This much, she can do.

The mage answers his gratitude with a nod, a hand half-raised to wave farewell, wondering if he will carry on or pause to say goodbye -- and just when she thinks it will be the former, he returns in full. Flustering, her fingers curl into her palm.

"O-oh." Her gaze follows his pointed finger, already aware of what his question must be. She doesn't really know why, either. While she was glad to do her part, she couldn't help but think this... really wasn't the best place they could have applied her skills. Her hands fold almost apologetically, one in front of the other. "...Yes."

"...Oh! Really...?" Katarina straightens up slightly at the offer, eyes widening slightly. The offer of help was already a pleasant surprise, but the suggestion that follows is very nearly perfect. Relief blossoms on her face like a small garden, and after a moment of hesitation, she nods. "If you're really sure... that sounds like a good plan. I wasn't sure what..."

I wasn't sure what I was going to do about that big box. Trailing off, she laughs quietly, a hesitant but earnest smile on her face.

"My name is Katarina. I'm... a Blue Lions student, for now. Thank you for the help..." Paper unfurls in a quiet crinkle, eyes already scouring the mess of words. "The box beside me isn't supposed to go very far... Just to the marketplace, for now."

Brains and Brawn || Tibarn & Katarina

Mission: Heavy Armor +1 || @ephemeralove || Mission Season: Restoration

[ephemeralove]

It almost surprises her when Sakura follows her line of questioning, a voice Katarina had come to associate with sweetness and mischief turned darker, lower. Part of her wonders if she has flecked the priestess with the stain of her unsightly shadow, but another part -- a quiet voice, one she had not realized existed until it spoke -- wonders: hasn't the Miss Silver she knows always been fond of playing along?

She is not used to hopeful voices; how odd, her steady hand. Sakura poses a question that follows the flow of forming thoughts: what was she doing when she met this man?

"...I was going to a seminar about swordsmanship," the mage answers slowly. It hasn't escaped her attention that the man mentioned the same. It didn't have to be her; it could have been anyone. Whoever participated at the seminar. Disdain draws her lips taut over her teeth, eyes narrowing further still. "An 'interactive seminar' that was supposed to give hands-on experience...

"...Is this the interaction?" She'd assumed it would involve demonstrations of technique, or perhaps offerings of guidance against striking dummies. Not once had it occurred to her that her would-be instructor would attack her without a word of warning! And she had more experience than many fresher faces at the Officers Academy; how would a fresh-faced rookie have fared in this thoughtless test?

"Yes-- yes! You understand!" The man half exclaims, half pleads, oblivious to the mage's growing frustration. "The students get much more realistic experience without any of the danger. I was going to teach them how to deal with interrogations too, but..." Katarina stares at him a moment longer, then turns her head to the side and sighs.

"How were they supposed to know they weren't in danger?" The mage accuses him, her voice many degrees colder. "I didn't know. You attacked me without any warning and hunted me through the woods."

"I--" His voice cracks. "I was at the meeting place!"

"I thought it was a trap," she counters quietly. The man founders in response, brow gnarled, mouth agape, expression desperate. He stammers something, but never past the first word... so concerned with what he had meant that he does not think on what he has done.

"...What if I was a first year?" The tip of Katarina's blade retreats from his throat, replaced by a question soft, yet sharp. "What if... what if I thought you really came to kidnap me? ...To kill me? ...You should have just explained first."

"...I..."

He falls silent. Katarina disregards him entirely, turning toward Sakura. Gray eyes fall upon the priestess, mournful where it had once been steel.

"...We should still turn him in," she suggests quietly. "He should be reprimanded..." A hand reaches up to fiddle self-consciously with her bangs, adrenaline dying in her veins. "...ah, um... Sakura? I'm sorry... for dragging you into this."

a mystery in monochrome

[ephemeralove]

"Oh! D... do you think so...?" The confession surprises her, enough that she simply watches for a moment as he secures his new charm, the one she'd received still idly pinched between thumb and forefinger.

Katarina has not lied to him. She has not, but somehow it feels as if she has. How can she lead him to believe more in luck when she herself is so uncertain? She holds her wrist near to her chest as she finally remembers to affix her own pearl, looking in its direction and yet somewhere slightly beyond it. Well, it isn't... such a serious thing, is it? But, still... guilt needles her anyway; it might have been a bit careless.

"...I agree," she answers, a bit more slowly than before. Her gaze is pulled up toward him when he speaks of his homeland, a quiet, rapt attention. "I don't think it's bad, either, but... I might understand. A, a bit."

Though she had felt its absence differently, always in her earliest memories the broken mirror, the forgotten coin, the black cat obstructing the path. She had come to disregard luck as it sounds that Leif has much more quickly than she had thought to believe in it again.

Katarina of Altea is silent longer than she means to be.

"...There was a long time where I didn't believe in luck. I didn't think about it, either..." --because if she did, what then? Was it her fault, or was she always meant to be that way? Every answer had become unbearable, so she had stopped asking the question.

"At least once... no, twice -- I really must have been lucky. But... I was also lucky because they worked hard. And, I..." ...maybe she shouldn't undermine her own example. "...a-anyway! What I mean is, um...

"Maybe... maybe sometimes even luck is hard work. O-or maybe it saves itself for specific moments...? But either way, even obvious victories... are never guaranteed. Your losses... and also your victories, your hard work, your luck... all belong to you." A self-conscious flush creeps up her neck, uncomfortably warm, her tongue leaden and unwieldy in her mouth. After a beat, the line of her mouth draws taut in a barely withheld grimace. "Sorry... I'm not sure that made any sense."

shades we're painted in

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025: first half.

[ephemeralove]

A soft knock on the door, trepidation leaked from her rosy lips as soon as she opened the door.

"Happy birthday!!" the petite priestess was not to be seen, as she was holding a large bouquet of roses, yellow, red, white and rose. "This for you, I hope you like flowers, I grew them in the greenhouse and I thought that they fit perfectly on you" she giggled, emerging from the side of the bouquet. "And that's not it, I have something else!" and as she handed the bouquet, she revealed from her small pouch, a tiny handmade gift hidden insde a small box decorated with long ribbons resembling he colour of Katarina's hair: inside, there was a small sword-shaped pin.

"I hope it remind you of the little adventure we had together!" and she happily smiled, handing the box as well.

Katarina never expects anyone at her door, not on normal days or-- well, they're all normal days, really. They can only ever be normal days anymore, now that Kleine is gone. Still she opens her door with a quiet hand, peeking out from the crack like a dormouse from its hole.

"--Sakura?" She recognizes her voice at least, if not her face, buried as it is beneath a flurry of roses. Yellow, white, red, and very nearly a garden -- like one the priestess is saying she grew them in, one she plucked them from, just for her. For a normal day fashioned into a birthday because the real ones were forgotten. It's all the mage can do to accept the flowers in quiet wonder as her friend keeps talking, cheerful like birdsong, the lone celebrant.

"I--" And there is a box, too. Hands fumble to accept it as she shifts the bouquet into the crook of her arm, all flurried blinks and hasty shuffling and the grace of a newborn foal. Eventually, reverently, she undoes the ribbons-- holds them there between her fingers-- and opens the box just a crack. A sliver of silver, a fraction more, and a flash of surprise across her face like summer thunder, subtle and transforming.

"...It's beautiful," Katarina murmurs softly, in time. The chiffon uncertainty she had donned at first is nowhere to be found; only a full and gentle appreciation, soft to the touch. A cautious hand closes the box once more, not to hide the gift away, but to keep it safe. What a waste it had almost been -- what a waste of a beautiful day, worthy of celebration.

"Thank you, Sakura. This means so much to me. I... I'll wear it to my next exam. For luck, or... encouragement." Hazarding a small smile, she holds it close to her heart, turning her head just slightly to smell the flowers. They're always so different from what she'd expected.

"Would you like to go to the market with me? I think... I'd like to buy a slice of cake." A breath, a laugh -- one and the same. "I'd be happier to buy two. Maybe... we can even stop by your flowers on the way back?"

[ephemeralove]

{ engagements

...She looks a bit silly with a bracelet slid over her gloves, no? Katarina eyes the pearl she's been given with some small, brief apprehension. Then again, she supposes she was always going to feel a bit awkward. Rather than wasting the encouragement she's been given, it would be better if she could make the most of it.

Uncurling her fingers from her palm, she makes her way toward the throng of people. To start with, there are a few people she wishes to find...

Tracker

Seashell: Nanna ; Ingrid ;

Starfish: Azama ;

Anchor: Edelgard ; Fiora ;

Turtle: Yunaka ;

Pearl: Kris ; Stahl ; Leif ;

[ephemeralove]

When he puts it like that, she actually does begin to feel a little bit better. Putting herself out there, even if she's been doing it in small increments, isn't limited solely to the social aspect -- garbing herself in something so drastic and striking had been nearly as nerve-wracking, sometimes. The intensity and contrast had been daunting at first, for all the days of her life she had tried to make little and so much less of herself.

"You're right," Katarina answers, somewhat uncertainly at first and blinking at her sleeve again like it's some sort of revelation. After a beat: "...Yes, you're right. It... takes a lot not to get lost in this sort of crowd."

Just as much as it takes to stay lost in this sort of crowd. She had only ever dressed for the latter until just recently. Being able to change tack like this was a small victory in its own right, wasn't it? Though it ill-suited her to think of it as such. "I hadn't thought about it like that. Thank you..."

He seems unsure of her compliment. Or maybe he mistakes her for admiring the pearl itself? She's far from bold enough to clarify regardless, accepting the charm with a ginger touch. Though, he says it's the same color... Katarina holds the pearl up curiously, eyes flickering between the two.

"...They really are," comes the quiet breath of wondrous agreement. With all the variety of people and pearls alike, it feels almost serendipitous. Would it be strange to call a coincidence well deserved? "That's... lucky, isn't it?"

--she grimaces internally. Conversation was never going to be an easy beast to conquer, but... He saves her by inquiring after her own instead, prompting the tactician-knight to extend her pearl-laden wrist.

"They're grey," she answers even though he can see for himself. The simple bracelet is nearly the same hue as the pearls -- it creates an interesting effect, though the faint pull of her lips upwards is wholly irrelevant to that. It is as simple as a same color, really; this coincidence may not be deserved, but she is glad of it nonetheless.

"...I didn't think they would have darker colors here." It didn't seem very noble -- less flashy and more drab (supposedly) -- but perhaps pearls and the like were exceptions to that. "I like it, though. Or... I like that my friend and I got the same one. That's lucky, too... I think."

[ FASHION POLICE + CROWDED ]

Bumping into the tactician, Leif tries to keep her from falling too much from the collision, catching her by the shoulder.

“ Whoa! Sorry about that. ”  He quickly apologizes and pulls away once they're both upright, checking over her person to see nothing somehow went amiss. When he does, he recognizes two things.

From afar, he's pretty certain he's seen that bracelet, the one with the moon, on it before. The other, the striking color that she chooses to adorn herself with.

Leif, knowing at this point little good would come of pointing out the former, chooses instead to focus on the latter.

“ ... Katarina, right? Sorry, I remember your name more as Ms. Meadow-Brook when we were at that mansion. ”  Now that he thinks of it, that time was in Adrestia too, wasn't it?  “ You were assigned a color like that back then too, right? Did you end up liking it so much? ”

Or was it a coincidence? Perhaps she was always dressed like this and this was a moment of serendipity.

--it is surprisingly nostalgic, bumping into someone like this, and surprisingly novel for having been the one charging ahead the last time. I-I'm sorry. I was in a hurry, and... Excuse me, did you come here to become an Altean knight as well? If only she had been as sturdy and as swift, she could have spared Kris from even just one more small hurt.

"I'm alright," Katarina reassures him, the corners of her lips quirking faintly upwards. She has never been blessed with the gift of an easy smile, but gratitude makes up enough of the difference. And she is grateful, though the expression naturally fades as recognition begins to take hold. He's--

"Oh," she answers, very eloquently. The tips of her ears suddenly feel hot -- yes, he was one of the lovely Baroness' assistants during her grand event. Yes. He helped with her attempted 'attempted murder'. Yes. A hand brushes at her hair self-consciously, but it passes soon enough, swept away with a quiet exhale that is not quite a laugh, but lighter than a breath.

"...yes, that's me. I hope you've been well, Leif." From what she had heard, he'd done his job quite admirably. The conversation turns to the color of her dress, and she raises a gloved arm as if to reexamine it. "Oh... I did. Actually..." Her voice softens somewhat, as if confessing to the the least of her sins. "...I wore that same outfit to the ball last year. The color is a bit too strong to wear every day, but I saw this dress..."

...She gets the sudden, distinct feeling that she's talking too much about something boring. "...I thought it would be nice... for a special occasion, at least."

As she hastens to cut herself short, Katarina turns her attention toward Leif's ensemble instead. It proves a stark contrast to how she last remembers him, this time clad in a striking blue and wreathed in brilliant white. And an earring, too! A... ...hm?

Since then, I've embraced pearls as though they are a mark of my love...

Is it? Could he be--? Yes, she supposes Nanna's outfit does look much like his! Without so much as realizing it, her entire expression changes subtly, yet wholly, warm in full where before she had been reserved as she is to the rest of the world. So, she had marked him with her love.

"...You have a lovely earring," Katarina smiles. "It suits you." Oh, how she would love to ask Nanna if her guess is correct... but not tonight.

[ephemeralove]

Katarina giggles softly for the flicker of disbelieving she knows has come and gone. It isn't anything he's done that betrays it; just a vague certainty she holds in her chest.

"...I like your usual outfit better," she tells him quietly, eyes turned to her wrist as she fiddles with her bracelet. The task doesn't require so much attention, but it eases some of the weight of shyness. "It's more... you. But this is good, too. It's..."

Handsome, she considers telling him. She considers it for a very long moment, then considers mentioning instead that their shared lodestar would certainly find it handsome as well. Neither happens; instead he says something terribly kind, or wonderfully cruel. He says that she looks beautiful.

He says that she looks beautiful and that horrible thing she's been bleeding everyday in a vice grip beats wildly, vividly, painfully out of time. He says that she looks beautiful and she knows, instantly, that she's doomed, embarrassment throwing messy, ungainly splotches of red all across her cheeks, her already clumsy tongue turned leaden in her mouth. He says that she looks beautiful and she knows it doesn't mean anything she wishes she didn't want it to mean.

"Ah-- I, um... I...!" Katarina hides beneath her bangs and regrets so very much that she attempted to style her hair today. Gray drops to the ground like a stone, even though she's safe in the knowledge he'll just think she's flustered by the compliment itself. A nail scrapes lightly at her cheek to sell the big, fat lie, and she squeezes tighter and tighter, until she hears her heart go pop.

"...Did I make it that obvious?" The question is meek, a little breathless. Another quiet laugh dispels the shock, and she is as she ever was. "Someone else asked me the same thing earlier." Maybe she should have worn something different? Though if she had, she never would've gotten to hear that. Nor would she have gotten to spend that time with Nanna, either... yes, she's happier like this.

"No..." The tactician shakes her head, gently rejecting his apology but accepting the pearl from him with a careful touch. Their charms may look the same, but -- oh... he smiles, however faintly, and she understands. Smiling back at him, it isn't that her lips are drawn any wider than usual, or that she bares her teeth in a pearly smile, or even that she is spurred to laugh just a little bit more in full. But the boy from Sera, though he makes himself a shadow, puts the light back into her eyes. Always.

"...I like this better, too."

@ephemeralove sent:

Kris dressed up? ...It's surprising enough to distract her from her own self-consciousness for a few passing moments, gray eyes grown just a touch wider, marking the occasion with a silent attention. --she smiles, after a moment. "It suits you." The softly-spoken compliment comes with the slight cant of her head, as if knocked askew by some unsaid revelation. It remains as such when she turns her gaze down, gloved fingers worrying the lone pearl on her bracelet. "...Here." Her voice grows softer still. "Just in case."

He has to bite down on the reflexive ‘Does it?’ and similar such responses that come to mind first thing. Kris knows Katarina, knows that she least of all—besides their liege and guiding star in one, that is—would say the attire suits him and not mean it. There is no reason to doubt her regardless of his own feelings on the matter, so he simply does not; the corners of his mouth upturned just enough to appear smiling instead alongside a kinder sheen in blue eyes.

“...I really wasn’t planning to wear anything nice for this. You can thank the guy who made it his personal problem to change that when he found out,” he replies dryly, ruining the moment anyway. “But I’m happy to hear that you think so.”

It’s easier to relax around her even in the midst of his self-imposed duty, expression softening again before long. “You look beautiful yourself. Really took a liking to that color, huh?” He’d thought as much last year too of course, but foolishly neglected to tell her outright. It should be acknowledged though– that she seemed even just a little more comfortable now, to dress as she does for these things. Knowing how far she must have come to reach such a point whether seen or unseen, what else can he be but happy for her?

“We’re matching,” he blinks, lifting his wrist to reveal an identical pearl bracelet gleaming against the blacks of his glove and sleeve. “Sorry I don’t have a different one this time.”

There is a certain quiet joy in knowing they received the same accessory though. No one else will be able to tell the difference when he accepts the proffered charm and swaps it with his own, holding out the latter for her to take in return. ‘This is yours now,’ the boy from Sera seems to say with the faintness of his smile alone. ‘I’m giving it to you.’

[ephemeralove]

[ FASHION POLICE + CROWDED ]

Bumping into the tactician, Leif tries to keep her from falling too much from the collision, catching her by the shoulder.

“ Whoa! Sorry about that. ”  He quickly apologizes and pulls away once they're both upright, checking over her person to see nothing somehow went amiss. When he does, he recognizes two things.

From afar, he's pretty certain he's seen that bracelet, the one with the moon, on it before. The other, the striking color that she chooses to adorn herself with.

Leif, knowing at this point little good would come of pointing out the former, chooses instead to focus on the latter.

“ ... Katarina, right? Sorry, I remember your name more as Ms. Meadow-Brook when we were at that mansion. ”  Now that he thinks of it, that time was in Adrestia too, wasn't it?  “ You were assigned a color like that back then too, right? Did you end up liking it so much? ”

Or was it a coincidence? Perhaps she was always dressed like this and this was a moment of serendipity.

--it is surprisingly nostalgic, bumping into someone like this, and surprisingly novel for having been the one charging ahead the last time. I-I'm sorry. I was in a hurry, and... Excuse me, did you come here to become an Altean knight as well? If only she had been as sturdy and as swift, she could have spared Kris from even just one more small hurt.

"I'm alright," Katarina reassures him, the corners of her lips quirking faintly upwards. She has never been blessed with the gift of an easy smile, but gratitude makes up enough of the difference. And she is grateful, though the expression naturally fades as recognition begins to take hold. He's--

"Oh," she answers, very eloquently. The tips of her ears suddenly feel hot -- yes, he was one of the lovely Baroness' assistants during her grand event. Yes. He helped with her attempted 'attempted murder'. Yes. A hand brushes at her hair self-consciously, but it passes soon enough, swept away with a quiet exhale that is not quite a laugh, but lighter than a breath.

"...yes, that's me. I hope you've been well, Leif." From what she had heard, he'd done his job quite admirably. The conversation turns to the color of her dress, and she raises a gloved arm as if to reexamine it. "Oh... I did. Actually..." Her voice softens somewhat, as if confessing to the the least of her sins. "...I wore that same outfit to the ball last year. The color is a bit too strong to wear every day, but I saw this dress..."

...She gets the sudden, distinct feeling that she's talking too much about something boring. "...I thought it would be nice... for a special occasion, at least."

As she hastens to cut herself short, Katarina turns her attention toward Leif's ensemble instead. It proves a stark contrast to how she last remembers him, this time clad in a striking blue and wreathed in brilliant white. And an earring, too! A... ...hm?

Since then, I've embraced pearls as though they are a mark of my love...

Is it? Could he be--? Yes, she supposes Nanna's outfit does look much like his! Without so much as realizing it, her entire expression changes subtly, yet wholly, warm in full where before she had been reserved as she is to the rest of the world. So, she had marked him with her love.

"...You have a lovely earring," Katarina smiles. "It suits you." Oh, how she would love to ask Nanna if her guess is correct... but not tonight.

[ephemeralove]

[ SPLASH ] Edelgard has no interest in going into the water. In fact, she'd prefer to stay as far away from it as possible. The chilling air encompasses her every stride, finding solace in that very act alone. Her back is turned to it and opts to focus on Katarina instead.

"It's been some time since we last spoke," she said in greeting. "How are you finding Adrestia? I'd like to hear your thoughts." In succession to her words, the princess unlatches the anchor charm dangling off her bracelet and extends it forward. "As strong of a fighter as you are, there are many more sides to a person than simply how well they can hold a sword or axe. Don't you think?"

There is a cooling breeze of water propelled by a larger gust of wind, bringing small droplets of water into the Imperial Princess's hair. She runs her free hand through it and dries it in the air. "I must say.. I've been wondering how others are taking to the venue change. While I don't mind, it certainly isn't Garreg Mach."

Katarina has no reservations about the water -- indeed it would have been difficult to keep any she might have had while carving her heart into Altea's distant shore -- but there is still something peaceful about watching it from a distance, as though apart from the world.

Though she is reminded time and again that she is as much a part of this world as anyone else, for better or for worse. And... somehow. (Two deaths past, and still she remains.) A voice calls out to her, tethering her to the earth.

"Lady Edelgard," she greets in turn, and though she does not smile outright, there is a shadow that falls away from her eyes as she turns from her vague reverie. As her gaze settles on the other it softens and warms, keeping its gentle touch even as her eyes turn back to sea.

"Adrestia..." Katarina turns the word over on her tongue, an implicit promise of thoughts carefully considered. After all, she speaks to the heir to the empire; there could be many layers to her curiosity, or perhaps none at all.

"...What I've seen so far is beautiful," she says to start, because it is. "It's also scarred... and mysterious." One cannot forget Rusalka, though whether it is the seed or the fruit of the forces that felled Garreg Mach she cannot say. "Ah... although that isn't a bad thing. The place I come from... is a bit similar. What matters most is that it's resilient."

Silvery gaze cuts toward the princess, a figure wreathed in crimson and gold like flames. She does not envy Edelgard the task that will one day fall upon her shoulders; the burdens lay as heavy as the wounds run deep. When that time comes she will be tried by a fire far more bitter than the one she wears tonight -- but Katarina has reason to believe it is not if she overcomes, but when.

"It's a wonderful place." She smiles quietly. "That's what I think."

Eyes flick down toward the anchor after a moment, accepted in silence and reciprocated in kind, a pearl held in the cradle of her palm.

"...That's true." Her smile widens just a touch, though there is a faint wryness in its stitch. "No matter what you think you have to be--" --a puppet, a knife-- "--you'll always be a person, too." Thus the same must be true of self-made shadows and seaside princes-become-kings, and so too of princesses wreathed in fire. Her gaze drops down to the gifted charm, affixing it to her bracelet with quiet reverence.

"...I'm bad at cooking," she murmurs abruptly, a bashful pink staining her cheeks, just because it feels right to share another facet of herself, however small... albeit thinking this does not make her feel less foolish once the words are spoken. "But I still study the recipes anyways."

Katarina watches the water splash her hair as if yanking on the moon's silvery ponytail. She doesn't revel in the imperial princess's minor inconvenience, but still -- it feels nice, somehow. A calm, simple moment.

"There are mixed opinions." There is a faint crease to the corners of her eyes, a subtle, empathetic upturn of her brow. "Broken traditions. Unfamiliarity. Loss..." A soft exhale, nearly a laugh. "...Water and sand. Lots of sand. But... I think they still find things to enjoy."

She smiles there, softly but surely.

[ephemeralove]

Oh! With the number of people who have shown up to the ball, it's difficult to find anyway who hasn't made themselves stand out brightly. When she sees the bright teal out of the corner of her eye, she isn't expecting it to belong to the timid woman she'd run into a few months ago. She looks wonderful, don't get her wrong, but Yunaka hadn't expected it from her.

It takes her some time, since she has to avoid all the strangers who might bump her or try to talk to her, but eventually Yunaka is able to make her way over to her. She's already detached one of her charms from her bracelet, so when she taps Katarina on her shoulder and waits for her to turn, she's already ready to hand it over.

"It's nice to see you again." Yunaka smiles. "You look really amazing. I hope you have a good time tonight."

Outside of Kris and Nanna (who she has already visited herself), Katarina largely expects to go unnoticed. Thus it comes as a surprise when someone taps her on the shoulder, gray eyes widening slightly when they land upon Yunaka, hand outstretched.

"Oh," she says simply, and color faintly touches her cheeks. It's-- it's just nice, to have been remembered. To have been complimented and wished well. Even if it's a small thing, it sits in her chest with a gentle warmth. Katarina averts her gaze for a moment, taking the chance to unclasp one of her own charms even as she tucks her smile away.

"Thank you for coming to see me," the mage finally answers, trading pearl for turtle. Holding it in her palm, she strokes the top of its shell with her thumb as if petting it, then turns a bashful half-smile toward the other. "...You, too. You look wonderful -- vivid. Bright."

Seeing movement past the other's shoulder, it occurs to Katarina just how busy someone like Yunaka might be. Naturally, someone with the strength to brighten and elevate a room would be well-loved. Suddenly she's very aware of the time she's occupying.

"...Yunaka? If, um..." A glance at the floor, then back to her. "...I'm good at finding quiet places. If-- if you need to take a moment to rest later..." Her smile takes on an awkward twist, but the small laugh that follows after is sincere. "...Um, anyway... take care. I hope you have a wonderful night."

[ephemeralove]

Subtly, the tide shifts. Katarina does not see it -- not tonight, clouded by tears and regrets and that small, tiny, infinitesimal voice that refuses to be snuffed into silence -- perhaps not ever; she has never had a way with people.

But it still does. Not towards victory, and neither toward loss, for there is no such thing here. But Andrei's voice comes out quietly and Katarina does not flinch -- defies, even in her quietude, but does not deny.

"You accept them," she answers softly. "Even... even if you make the wrong ones." Like allowing yourself to be wielded as a weapon, hiding from your culpability in life and hiding from it in seeking death. But, death? It had only been rejection. Even if it has been painful more days than it has been joyous, Katarina finds that she is glad death rejected her in kind. "And... when you learn to live with them, you realize you've learned to live."

"...Okay." As much as she wishes he was, Andrei is not Clarisse. Neither is he Roro, nor any of the boys he used to be. She cannot justify reaching out to him when he turns away, but-- she watches, still. Waits, just in case he turns around. She never could help herself.

"...Andrei?" A small pause. "I'll... be here."

There is no explanation she could offer that she thinks he would not hate -- but even then, she means it. So she lets the truth lay with the sound of her retreating footsteps, the thing it isn't, and the quiet promise it therefore is.

a night and day we'll never see

[ephemeralove]

{ engagements

...She looks a bit silly with a bracelet slid over her gloves, no? Katarina eyes the pearl she's been given with some small, brief apprehension. Then again, she supposes she was always going to feel a bit awkward. Rather than wasting the encouragement she's been given, it would be better if she could make the most of it.

Uncurling her fingers from her palm, she makes her way toward the throng of people. To start with, there are a few people she wishes to find...

Tracker

Seashell: Nanna ; Ingrid ;

Starfish: Azama ;

Anchor: Edelgard ; Fiora ;

Turtle: Yunaka ;

Pearl: Kris ; Stahl ; Leif ;

[ephemeralove]

"Katarina, please?" She asks with sweet glistening eyes. "Please?"

"...I will be forthright with you. You should know I adore clothing. I believe it an expression of disposition while outwardly projecting what one would love to be perceived as... And it is only right that someone as incredible as you should find something so lovely to match your aptitude. Your beauty is understated, both inside and out, so I'd love to help you..."

She tapped her chin. "A dress could even feel like home, if you allow it to."

Hooking her by the elbow, she guided them both in. "...I could even help tailor the dress closer to your specifications. ...It will be fun!" Laughing on her way in, she waved at the dress store owner who now had her name on her lips and the wisp of familiarity painted over her gaze.

"Is there anything that catches your eyes?"

She has never doubted that Nanna has a way with words (that way, she thinks, is sincerity; captivating, and undeniable). Still it surprises her that she should be lured from her shell so easily, much as she has made it both her armor and her cage -- but when she promises that a dress can feel like home, Katarina feels something stay with her.

"Home..." The word turns over on her tongue. Gray attention drifts from where it had rested on her companion's face to the flurry of fabrics as the two of them breeze into the store, arm in arm. An inscrutable thought comes and goes, little more than a shimmer in dim eyes.

"That..." They abandon the dresses to return to Nanna -- to the sweet anticipation on her face, to the way the shopkeeper answers her with a familiar affection. How she has come to be worthy of such a beautiful person's esteem, Katarina does not know; rather, she suspects that she still is not. Nevertheless something tangles in her lips, wry at first, and uncertain, knotted up with words yet to be spoken. Then in a rush, they untangle -- and to even Katarina's surprise, it unravels as gentle laughter.

"...That would be nice," she admits, and there is warmth in her eyes like summer rain. Simply, suddenly, and certainly, Katarina knows that the greater sin would be to deny her friend this small happiness. Of all the things she has stolen from others, she would not have one be Nanna's joy. After all, she has all the rest of her life to carry her sins; she should not allow them to impose their sorrows on the good that exists around her.

"I believe it," Katarina continues softly, affection in the scant wisp of mirth that haunts her voice. "Your clothes are always... ah." Is it that the words evade her, or that Nanna defies simple description? "...lovely. Bright -- dazzling."

But what of Katarina? What does one ask to be perceived as when she so often asks the world to forget? One hand closes over the side of the scarred other, drawn close to herself in a beat of uncertainty.

Is there anything that catches your eyes?

Not at first. It takes a second glance to notice the dark dress squirreled away in a corner of the store. Katarina approaches hesitantly, reaching toward the garment but never touching. In the dark of it, flowers bloom -- those things that only blossom when touched by light.

What does she want them to know? She has only ever wanted to be known by those who matter to her; perhaps that is why, even if softly, she murmurs her answer aloud.

"I'm..." The hand withdraws, fingers curling into her palm. "...becoming myself."

Suddenly her head turns at a bashful angle, the side of her jaw brushing against her shoulder. Specklings of pink warm her cheeks, but she meets Nanna's eyes all the same.

"...Thank you. This means so much to me. Not the dress-- ah, not just the dress-- but you. Your friendship..." Being seen. Being known. Her gaze dips to the floor before rising again.

"Could we... stop by another store on our way back?"

After a heartbeat, Katarina dares to smile.

"I'd like... I want to get you a present, too."

[ephemeralove]

It's only in moments like these where she misses the dark. All-encompassing, all-consuming, at least when it swallows her whole she knows there is nothing. Out in the daylight there is nothing that hides her well enough, garish purple sticking out like an unwanted flower that had never known a garden. Out in the daylight she covers her ears, and the world still exists outside of her.

She covers them anyway. Nails carve at the tender flesh of her nape, head wedged into the point of her joined elbows. If he's going to hurt or even kill her, then she doesn't want to see it coming. That's the only other good thing about the dark -- at least, until your eyes adjust.

"Don't-- don't kill me," she begs; the hypocrisy sticks to her skin more cloyingly than all the dirt and grime. With the way he had moved to parry her, there's no way he doesn't at least know she meant to hurt at best; at worst he already understands she had meant to kill. Yet here she is, a coward and a fool begging for her one paltry life when she'd meant to reap two.

"N-not yet," Reese hurries to add in pacification, as if asking to live is too much; as if, but isn't it? "I just need to-- medicine-- my sister--!" It all comes out a jumbled mess, and as she says it aloud she even begins to doubt herself. The first step is to buy time, to undermine herself so that he'll follow suit, and she can turn the tables. A lamb leading the wolf to slaughter.

But what if it doesn't work, if he doesn't believe her? Kleine isn't like her -- she's strong, confident, worthy of Lady Eremiyah's praise... She'll be okay if Reese dies, right? If she has to be? Maybe even if she doesn't have to. Plus she has Roro and the other boys, too. So if she thinks about it -- dying doesn't sound so bad.

"You..." That desperate grip on the back of her head slackens, heat welling up where her nails no longer dig into her skin. Where before her frame had been taut with fear, Reese slumps against her knees. This time when she speaks, it is quiet, oddly calm. "You can kill me after. I promise."

beyond memory and dream

[ephemeralove]

"It should be," she agrees in a soft voice, scurrying back in the direction of the voice once they'd managed to separate from the hunters. "But if the hunters didn't hear it, then it may have used magic to talk to us... which could make the radius much wider. Maybe..." Lips press together, thoughtful, hopeful, but also doubtful. "Maybe it can guide us to it now that we're apart from the group."

"Yes," the voice breathes in her mind; what first echoed in her skull suddenly takes direction. Katarina straightens slightly, eyes cutting across the path. "I can. This way... please, help me..."

Whatever it is, it's hidden itself well enough that she can't see it yet. "...I hope so," Katarina answers his question. "The hunters might not believe us if they can't hear it... but that just means we have to work ahead of them. If we can keep them apart long enough to get it to safety..."

"Safety," the voice repeats longingly; this time it sounds closer, more to the side of the path. Katarina follows suit, kneeling at the side of the path, brushing her fingers through the grass in a performative search for her 'lost trinket.' What truly has her attention, however, is the pair of eyes glinting from within the foliage.

"Here I am," the voice whispers. "Are you... friends?"

KK Slider Saves a Monster

Anniversary | Lance +1

[ephemeralove]

♡

●●○○○ | ATTRACTION ○○○○○ | AFFECTION ●●○○○ | INTEREST ○○○○○ | LOYALTY ○○○○○ | TRUST

I'm sorry that I startled her so badly. With everything that's been going on... and it wasn't for anything important, either. I shouldn't have bothered her.

But... it's selfish, but part of me is glad that I did, if it's not too much of a burden on her. She's... bright, in a captivating way. And the thing with the bear was cute. I should make mine quickly...

LOW | ●●●●● | HIGH