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yeah

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Conversational skill check: Work acquaintance mentions in an offhand tone with no discernible expression that they have recently lost over 20 pounds. They fail to elaborate. A response is expected.

Me, rolling a 6: …On purpose?

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someone give picture of the anime guy with 3000 bones i want to look at it

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How the fuck am I supposed to meet a fellow lesbian and then convince her to date me

Don't know anything about lesbians, but maybe if you walked around carrying a baseball bat that'd be really bad ass.

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honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

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stop playing it cool, just be passionate and intense and insane and whoever sticks around is meant for you

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cat mama

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No, no. I can have one more shot, I swear. I won’t start behaving like a flamboyantly gay pansy stock character in a pre-code film again. I swear. You can trust me. Darling, you must trust me.

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I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. A guy asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight

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I love seasonal fruits they're like girl we're back lol

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hey guys check it out I can do a frontside 180 with my stomach haha

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down with the cis bus ?????

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You're so cool, please never get cancer.

I’ll try

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hate an x reader fic do not put me in a situation

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does anyone have that quote that goes something like 'white germans under the nazis lived just fine as long as they were loyal to the state, gave their children to the army, and paid their taxes, and in this sense many americans would be comfortable living under fascism' trying to find who said it but google is giving me jack shit

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Just so you know, a normal response to a child breaking something is to first check to see if they got hurt and then if they’re old enough make them help clean it up. And then afterwards explaining to them how to avoid doing that in the future. At no point is yelling necessary to make them understand why they shouldn’t do that.

[erinchavi]

The Mermaid, 1939 by Henry Clive (Australian, 1882–1960)