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[esfarrapsdodia]

Second draft!

Well, that was not a daily update, not even a wekly one, but I'm here!

And you too Camomille (I like the fact there is actually no one reading it but I keep assuming you are; it's better actually, being you and me alone in the internet world. I was actually always relutant on making a blog, someone could end up reading too soon. I don't know, I mean I'm writing then someone will read it and I don't know, be inspired or laugh their eyes out, and I'm also scared of someone read it... Yeah, MOVING ON)

SO! Last time I came, I said I had some goals, probably, I just remember two. One was to find a study book and the other make a routine!

I did! It took more than a week, and I almost gave it all up, maybe I did not, and came to update!. Lol.

So, I found the book, I got genki (on a super legal way, since my parents super know what I am studying and also I`m a grown independ woman, of course, that`s the truth)

Yes, I know it`s ilegal, I promisse if I like it I`ll buy it in the future! It`s just that I don`t even know if I`m going to make it and I am planning to buy an advanced English book (since I still want to study in Canada or German to my second degree). And that stuff is expensive.

Anywhays! Let`s go to some legal stuff I`m doing to study! I also found two websites that seems to be working out on the learning senteces? LingQ and Hukumusume.com. I will explain

The first one is from a seems to be really king old man that knows a bunch of cool languages and made a website to help language learners out.

It has some cool future but I`m just on the first story, basically they offer me a bunch of grammar lessons and some easy stories in japanese that I translate slowly till I start to get the language working. Something around it. If it`s working, I ain`t really sure, I mean, I am better at understanding the Japan quote structure, what is great! But it is still really slow and hard, but even he said it`s gonna take a lot of determination to get somewhere! So I`m holding on to that! Also, I try to stay motivated sinse Twisterd wonderland is not translated yet and I am too anxious for understand the game, also I subscribed to some music channels in japanese and I`m so curious for the comments and the no music videos.

This kind of motivation has two sides since, A- I get hyped and motivated/ B- I get too scared since it`s taking too long and I want to get them now. And feel bad I`m a slow learner and etc

But, I try to think on the things I know.

For example!

I learned some news particles (basicale some syllabes that make a bunch of words work together, like the glue of the japanese senteces), I just knew one way of using NO and HA. Till now, there is only one way to use ha, but I am starting to feel more confortable with the second way of using NO. And also I got the NI particle better (it`sm more or less like the at in english). OH! Also, I learned that jin means from somewhere, so you can say Japan jin, that would be like japanese, but I don`t know the country names or cities in japanese so I can`t make a sentece out of it, YET

BUT BACK TO MY POINT

ROUTINE

I said I was going to make one.

So, I got myself a new goal, that was accidental.

So, my mom found a website that gives some tips if you want to get into a foreign university, and I basically found out I have no sufficient extracurriculars (Also, I`m 18 it`s not like I`m going to get myself so many opportunities that easily) so we needed to make ourselves some oportunities! That`s one of the reasons I decided to make a blog out of my language learning progress. I mean, I started it and since I`m not telling anyone about this idea of mine (I don`t want to feel pressured if I don`t finish), I needed to have a place to cherrish my accomplishments! And since the website said I should focus on my liking and dreams and also making a website to share it would be nice. Here I am (ALSO, notice that sharing in a website no one knows who you are and isn`t really reading it makes things easier >3)

Back to the extra thing I got in my routine!

It`s an online theather course.

It sounds weird, I know. Maybe it does now to you Chamomille, but I`ll clarify

I`m the shy/introverted girl from my school, the one that speaks so smothly it seems like there is a rat that speaks (but when I`m excited I scream and chat like a megaphone, turned on a super powerful battery), the one that didn`t really engaged into school dances and presentations. It`s not because I did not want too, NO. I actually lied to myself that was the reason. But I just got so scared of the eyes of people on me, the judgemnt I thought that was there that... I couldn`t move.

In fact, I just hid myself on things I could do, write.

I am a writer, even thought I am in a personal block (again), and I even helped on mini school theathers to make the script. But that was not the only thing I wanted to do, and since I had no much experience in good interactions with real people, my dialoges lack smothness. I tried to fix it myself, Let`s briethly say, I could not.

I mean, let`s be fair, I improved a lot! I moved myself to talk, I participated on a RPG session (a lot actually) with people I didn`t even know, somehow that worked out for a while. I made myself talk in big group chats, I even had conversations that lasted more than some are you okay patterns. Yeah, but it was not enough. I lacked movement, I was so scared to mess everything up! I can`t really say, but I have rules in my head, really thouth ones, that if I break, Everyone is going to hate me, that`s final.

That get`s me over the heels and so exausted.

But there was a thing I always hear of theather courses, that even shy people get themselves more confidence and more social skilled when they engage on this kind of art.

So I thought, I`m already 18, I`m going to need social skills, I am needing some strong help. So, yeah.

That`s how it ended

Course to Enem (somehow like SAT)

Theather course

Japanese

Oh, I take swimn classes so I wont dye by diabetes (it`s in my family bloodline)

It sounds simples, but not much since I have terrible focus and Enem is in november,

God, help.

BUT, I have a routine, the fourth attempt this year! But this one seems better than the last one. And I have you, Chamomille on my side!

I think I sound desesperated.

Wait a second

THis was suposed to be a japanese learning diary...

Okay

Well!

I did include around two hours of japanese per day, the first one is updating flashcards and my apps (that helps me with hiragana and katakana) and the second one is purely readind and making new flashcards. First in the morning, second in the early night.

Since it`s the one I am more passionate about, I get one hour to be one of the first things I do to make myself more motivated byu the rest of the day and the second the last activitie so I will have energy to do it even if I am tired.

I don`t know how good this routine is, that is the first official day, since I was feeling quite bad since back back yesterday, alas monday, I was not making great improvements, but I did a good job today, and I hope tomorrow will be better!

Alas, my next goal!

1. I want to really follow the japanese routine (together with the rest of it, but this is a japanese blog after all)

2. I want to read the second page of lingQ story (it is divided in pages)

I won`t start with the textbook right now, I`m still working hard on my kanas and lingq to get grammar into this mess, also, I only study two hours per day, I want to focus on reading a lot first!

[esfarrapsdodia]

First draft!

So, hi!hi!

How is life?

Hope it's fine! Cheers for you and also thank you for starting a journey on my blog <3

I believe since you will take a while to read my production it's good to have a name associated with the creator, I mean, I tend to always think the writer is a woman and call they by "she" all the time, but it's memorable to have a name. So you can call me... Tea. I mean, like the drink. I did not have enough time between the "I should do it" and the "I am doing it"; and I like tea (and you can use any pronouns on me, it's fine). Also, I think it is fair calling you guy Chamomile, my favorite one. Sounds cute, but anyways. I am thinking of all this whole bunch of words and getting myself to believe this is a whole of pointlessness. But I like it. It's fine.

Moving on!

I started a blog! Technically it's a secondary blog, and the only reason I'm using this one instead of the main one is. I'm lazy and a perfectionist. This is my brand new Idea, I would like to start it from dust, and my main blog is concentrated on being a very good bunch of messiness. And I would like to get the house clean before starting.

And that's the reason I'm buying a new rent-free one. Pretty good, huh?

Moving on! Again!

This blog is to write about learning Japanese and is supposed to make me motivated. AND, I'm bad to deal with a lot of people, but I get bored of writing on Word, or Evernote, or Notion, or Google docs, or any other underrated website to work as a diary that I've already tried out. And like I said I like clean things, I dislike cleaning them.

That is precisely why I'm starting here! With you by my side, dear Camomile! Or Darling Camomile! Just, hearts for you Camomile one. I don't make sense sometimes, sorry not sorry!

THEN

How is it working?

Why am I explaining things for a sake of organizations if it's supposed for me to not get many readers? I like it, my friends say I'm probably good at teaching. I don't tell them "well, Teachers are good at making a point, I try to organize the messy bunch of points connected in my head that are, themselves, trying to make a point"

If you, Camomile, laughed, I should be a comedian. Well, I laugh at anything, literally, so I can't tell I would make a good one.

AGAIN, HOW IS IT WORKING?

I'm supposed to get here

Daily

Weekly

Any of the two above is fine, nothing more.

To update the tea flavours of the progress I'm making!

This way, I can keep myself motivated and I will also be able to practice English, cause if you didn't tell I'm not a native speaker. A. I'm doing good! or B. You're not as well, hugs!

I love hugs, I say it a lot.

SO

FINALLY

MY PROGRESS

I started learning it, like, years ago, but gave up, a lot of times. BUT I'm doing it again, not the giving up part, obviously (hopefully).

Then, I started again, I believe there have been... Three days? Four? No historic person here. Anyways, I have already made myself learn the hiragana (one of the Japanese alphabets, you can call it that way), and some of the katakana... Some of it.

The Kanji (the feared alphabet) I just progressed like, one? It's fine, they are not the point at the moment.

And some words, like numbers, and some colors.

As you can probably tell I'm kinda lost, that's why today I'm going to finally decide how the heck this is going to progress! I mean, I need a textbook, apps aren't going to be enough, and I have made my research, unless I want to sound like a kid or a rude adult I can't guide myself by anime either. That is my mission for today!

Also, I would like to say that, the last attempts usually ended on the alphabet. I never finished learning hiragana properly, so I guess I am in a new area since I am starting katakana! But I know I have to make a better plan, I'm 18y now, I have to get myself really organized if I want to get to a college AND learn Japanese. Let's not talk about crazy ideas today, just don't Camomile. I know you are about to write about it now, stop.

And also, I figured that having games to help me learn instead of only writing the structures a lot of times helped me a lot, I got more motivated to get through. I also tried to read them from music and Netflix Totoro (I found out they are on hiragana and katakana, not much of Kanji, THANK GOD), just a bit, we only have one screen and my mom watches it a lot. Like a lot.

Well, that's for today! Thank you for the warm company Camomille! Tea is going to achieve her mission!

Have a nice day!