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If you are a vampire NEVER feed from someone named Richard. 400 fucking years and everyone still calls me Dick Sucker

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if this gets 100,000 notes then i, the worlds greatest space agency will personally shoot donald trump into the sun

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you ever get assigned something as a project in school and for the rest of your life you have a strange attachment to the subject. in like seventh grade i had an assignment to make a poster about the elemental propoerties of osmium and to this day everytime someone mentions it im like 'YEAAAAAAH OSMIUM MENTIONED!!!!!!!!'

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oh I see. it was the crime of wanting. that's why I deserve it.

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Joining the war on queerbait on the side of queerbait bc after a time you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing after all as wanting. It is not logical but is often true

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this episode has convinced me that it is vic, not brennan, who is sam's true narrative foil. his archnemesis. a worthy adversary who does not hesitate to throw his psychological torment right back at him

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Very depressing how Orpheus gets a dad, a mentor, and a wingman all in one and Eurydice just gets three women telling her to kill herself

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EXCUSE ME????

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ok so the other day i was at sears. I was in the baby section. Im standing there looking at clothes and a lady who works there comes up and is like “oh are you expecting?” And i was like “uhhhh” and because im a dumbass i was like “no i already delivered.” And she was like “How long ago?” And i was just like “two weeks.” And she said “wow! You look great! When i had my first son, i looked like a mess for six months. Is it a boy or a girl?” And i was just awkwardly like “a girl….” And she asked her name and i said Chernobyl and she was like “oh what a cute name! It sounds really familiar.” And i honestly just stood there going through all that and pretending i had a human baby two weeks ago named Chernobyl because i didnt wanna tell this poor lady i was buying baby clothes for my fucking baby opossum

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having a freeze response to stress is so funny in the context of normal adult stressors. millions of years of evolution are trying to tell me that the email will not find me if i stay very still and do nothing

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good response to a lotta shit you see online can just be "what do you mean we"

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SEVERANCE 2.04 Woes Hollow / 2.10 Cold Harbor

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in addition to neil banging out the tunes, you also have to leave out cookies and a trans flag for lup tonight (tomorrow is 8 years since her debut episode)