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my granddad just called me to tell me how big his cauliflowers are growing and it was so cute theyre “TWICE as big as the ones you get in the shop”

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There’s a doduo on my head haha

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The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.

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im a cheater

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“I know, I know, I have to admit it. I guess I’m a man, men are allowed to go to the bathroom, but women, what can we say? […] This is a guy who wants to be President of the United States.”  - Bernie Sanders on Donald Trump’s comments on Hillary Clinton

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Mother: “What do you even do in the internet that you dedicate so much time to it?”

Me:

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J.R.R. Tokin’ and George R.U. Fartin’ from Awful Fantasy: The Card Game

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Let's go back to my home planet 👽💚 #snapchat #filter #alien #demon #whateveryouwanttocallthis #blue #hairdye

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Went on a hike with these two 🌲🌞🐶 #puppy #chihuahua #wienerdog #chiweenie #mix #chiweeniesofinstagram #husky #terrier #mix #hike #nature #colorado #life #coloradogram #noco

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my kink is a happy n fulfilling relationship

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Almost Dawn by Forrest Stanley