existential-renegade

[existential-renegade]

The consequences of action is not the biggest guilt held but are merely the shadow of the lost opportunity dissipated by those decisions. You can’t take back the faded fragments of a past I never had.

I’m left to wonder if there was ever the chance, I’m left to question why I can’t even utter the words I once did. They now sit stagnate a jumbled swamp of viscous emotion, elevated acidic complexity like a puddle of oil in the rain.

Nothing can be said, nothing can be done. Nothing but hope reduction that has been diluted by time.

[existential-renegade]

This song is way beyond amazing!

All about it it’s just perfect! The lyrics, the melody, Dan’s voice, everything!!!!

[existential-renegade]

Lost in a sea of madness; a tempest amidst the volcanic ash and nuclear fallout in the vail of twilight. Somehow every now and then I found myself calm, with you wrapped in my arms…

Years have passed now and the shell shock is constant, the war 360 degrees and the storm is right outside the front door. All I know is you’re out there and that this time; this time I don’t how to get you home safe. I’d die if it made a difference. I’d give up every life I had and every life I have left.

[existential-renegade]

You understood; even when you couldn’t understand.

I don’t know why we came here. All I needed was you. The distant denial in a revolution I didn’t need to fight. For morals that have no existential grounds only mortal virtue, just to find a better way.

This is more than just a war for a world but a battle against the whispers of a fated infinite. A battle against god itself so I stripped armour for you. The only way to truely win in virtue. This battle fought in a moral wasteland on sacred ground, consecrated; in death.

And now? You’re gone.

Fairy Dance - Karl Wilhelm Diefenbach c.1901. Edited by The Clayshaper.

[existential-renegade]

As my eyes pierced through the abyss for an eternity by literal definition, the perspective in my mind shifted. Only then, was I able to see the horizon within the distance and as the abyss filled with light I finally felt consumed by the destiny I chose. It seems as if only now I understand the true sonder of the abyss and the essence of truth within the glow I found.

... ideal beach day ...

[existential-renegade]

By adif.robotics

[existential-renegade]

[existential-renegade]

The ghost of the past caught me but as the night struck and the chaos ripped through the fabric, suddenly a warm presence violently punched through my soul to scrape off the crude.

Lady of the Lake by Diana Van Damme

[existential-renegade]

To feel lost yet found, a sense of self that had to exist to know the difference. Sometimes you lose everything to really understand that. Pretty confident in who I really am yet that is all you are all you have, you had to loose everything for that. Yet to wonder if all you came to this world with is all you ever had regardless of the reality you come from or the one you came to inhabit.

I’m more than ok with that, all I hope is that one day you are too. Maybe then and only then our souls could handle it together. I’m believe there’s a reason I can only see through my eyes and a reason I could see through yours the instant we met.

Going to start posting again on here! Here's a study I did of Loki a few months ago!

[existential-renegade]

I have to choose to be the highest levels of moral success and capability of being. I do, I feel it I have to, just know that. Who else can sense it for us? No one …yeah, never met this “Know one” guess it’s up to me… I am now one.

I am, I can, I do, I feel, I know, I sense, I will, I do, I believe, we are.

The power you crave

My patrons will get (May 2024 only):

$7 "Because you can" tier - SFW 4k version

$10 "All you need" tier - everything above, plus PSD file

[existential-renegade]

Wish I died when I was with you, my life ended when I lost you for the first time.

[existential-renegade]

death

[existential-renegade]

Gratitude seems to be such potent essence of wisdom a taste of that which is magical, rooted in the edges of the now. Appreciation; this golden lining to the fated vessel known to us as physics, a jar of lightning. Physics that determine the options present to the free will of those sentient inside the sands of time; dust contained by the fabric of reality…

Free will and destiny are irrelevant to gratitude.

Burial Mound, oil on canvas by Zack Dunn

This artist on Instagram

[existential-renegade]

insp.

[existential-renegade]

Am am the most annoying person alive, I know; I haven’t quite worked out how solve that yet.

(No sympathy required or desired)

thisisyourfaceondogs. gouache watercolor

[existential-renegade]

Is this to be expected of life… is this a sentence?

The Forerunner, 1894 by Eugène Trigoulet.

[existential-renegade]

Reality seemly this relentless paradox doing the opposite of all when witnessed, when I care for it. The outcome opposite of that desired but why?! What magick is needed to be uttered and echoed? Who will form this reality of peace and nirvana?Please I beg why does it all must be a lessons based on lives after life? Why could i just had peace the first time?

What is the true point of continuous lessons? Is it to prepare the essence for an eternal fate of dread and if so why would any god create such a thing? If a god were alone in the abyss clearly it may create company but that would indicate it’s not omnipotent if it were unable to just had created only serenity to begin with.

I know to much and yet to little to solve it only way is forward and to find the evolutionary piece that can interact with the fates and the fabric of physics itself as a being. Is that to violate some inter-reality law or is it ethically acceptable on that scale?! …What is demanded of me?

Greater Morula, Photoshop painting by Dariusz Kieliszek