faceless-man-in-empty-room

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

سألتني ايه وصلني هنا، قولتلها مش هعرف اقولك الحقيقة، اخر مرة كلمتها و اخر مرة عموما هنتكلم، حسيت حقها تعرف ايه وصلني هنا، كتبتلها كتير عن اكبر خسارة في حياتي، ماقدرتش ابعت، ولا قدرت اكدب، لابد ماكدبش، هربت و غيرت الموضوع

أنا مرهق و كنت احب تلفي دراعاتك الصغيرة حوالين دماغي، لا دراعاتك هنا ولا أنا برتاح لما المس او اتلمس بعدك

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

حقك عليا يا أغلى مني عليا

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

هي الدنيا تبقى دنيا إلا بيك ! ❤

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

مخي و انا داخل على أي بنت مش فاهمة ليه كل الناس بتبعد عنها

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

لسه بحاول و لسه مش عارف

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

I was going to start this with a sarcastic tone. To destruct the possibillity of the unknown entity (enemy) in my mind. Watching every word I said, judging me for it, I consider myself to be a writer, I'm sure I'd be good if I give it time and effort, but maybe not this life time. I love story telling. Also because I like introductions. A hell lot, always did. Anyways, I was going to analyse a quote mostly written on the videos of men just a little while before ending their lives. "A star shines the brightest before it dies. (I'm sure you'd tell me an essay about that if i mentioned it when you were here. You loved the stars dearly. Fuck the stars. Fuck you.) So yes sarcastic unkown entity (enemy), its going to be a cliche about men's sadness, I think I win this round, maybe because I no longer hate my enemeis the way I did. Would be an overstatement if I said: I hate no one! I hate a ton of people. See again I thought I won this round but the entity kept me going right and left to not write something that'd feel like a teenage girl broken apart. But that I win as well, a teenager a couple years back at a therapy clinic was sobbing in the other room, because she hates it. She hated all that I hated but couldn't expressed. Not even with half this courage, she hated not wanting to eat, not wanting to sleep not being able to make friends, not being like other people. She had both her parents. I didn't tresspass, I even heard her over my earphones, a room of a complete desruction, parents trying to help but unable to do shit, and a little human being broken to their bottom of soul, wondering what the fuck is happening. What's sad; completely heart wrenching: Little (human) girl back there, would live her life, if ever she did. And will never know how that thing was probably the strongest thing I ever heard a little human said, If I did when I was her age, I surely completely go fucking mad about how helpless I'm and how awful my life is going to be. But no I wouldn't say if she had luck. I'd pray for her

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

if i was. i made sure its far more than enough

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

اكتر حاجة بدوس على وشي عليها طول الوقت، إني طول حياتي خليت ناس تحاسب على مشاريب ناس تانية، و عمري ما عرفت اقف، "دمي دا بيجري فيه كرات دم بيضا و حمرا و" لأ و مش نسوان زي ما فتحي عبد الوهاب كان بيقول في سهر الليالي، كنت فاكر إنه سيم، طبيعي، بس انا عروقي كلها خوف، كسم الدم اللي فيها قاطم مالهوش حس، خوف حد ماعهوش فرامل، عاوز يفرمل مش عارف، عاوز أموت، عشان الخوف يخلص بس للأسف برضه -و هو تناقض صحي- برضه مش عاوز اموت بحلم كنت اكون جنينة، حتى لو هنا، برضه هيقعد عندي محبين بيعطوا، و بيضحكوا و بيتخانقوا و قطط و حيوانات، إستراحة، بحلم فعلًا بأكتر شكل مبتذل ممكن، أنتصر على موتي بإني أفضل أحن، أفضل أقرب صورة بشرية للجنينة

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

He lingers in my Memories —

As one already Dead. 🥀

[faceless-man-in-empty-room]

إيه مفهوم السعادة بالنسبة لك

الطيز الكبيرة