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#never put any hawaii pics on here so here they are#Also i feel like being sad on ur finsta is a lil out bc people get concerned abt u super fast if youre sad on there#and i dont want attention that much#it just feels good to put feelings out into the mf internet and let the internet deal w it instead of u ya know#any im sad as hell lol#I feel like ive done a bad thing and now i can never come back from it#i dont understand why im so dumb#and keep myself from being happy ... all the time#most of the badness that happens to me is my fault#and also i just hate hurting people#and i feel like such an inconvenience to everyone i reach out to so i feel like i just need to keep everything in until it stops mattering#and i never bother anyone else again#or i wait until things get so bad that i cant control myself and i just lose it and people have to help me then because i cant help it#and then im not responsible bc theyre chosing to help#idk#in the words of er*ca circa 2017 i hurt everyone who has ever loved me lmao#great thing to tell a child lmao but its still sticking with me! and actually! shes probably right lmao!#anyway no one owes me any time or attention and i have no right to ask for it#and when i do#i feel good for a second and then worse later!#So! the answer is that i shouldnt reach out anymore i guess.#I just need to sleep :(
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i have rocks and crystals and i like them and i like to buy them and i’m always afraid ppl will be like “oh u must kno something about Witchcraft or Spirituality” but i don’t know dick about shit i just like shiney rocks, i’ve got a Crow Brain
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not to be a “this whole website is one giant social experiment” but it honestly blows my mind on how tumblr has completely twisted the genuinely good philosophy of “be thoughtful and think critically of the media you consume” and turned it into this extremist mindset where something is either completely ideologically pure in every single way (which, bad news. is impossible) or it’s the work of Complete Evil and must be banned and ignored in its entirety if found to be slightly problematic. and from this mindset has blossomed a black and white lens on human nature and a terrifying 1 strike and you’re out system with no growth mindset whatsoever
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i wish i were a tiny mouse tucked up in a tiny bed under a tiny patchwork quilt in a burrow under a tree. no responsibilities except making raindrop wine and rose jam and making sure i sweep the little doorstep every morning
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#im really tired#ive been doing okay but tonight feels v bittersweet for some reason and im just crying a lot lol#i know once i get back to school everything will probably be okay???#or at least my reasons for being sad will probably change#idk id just like to not feel so bad all the time :/#its okay like my life is pretty good rn?#i just get easily irrationally lonely#I guess#i just wanna be held damn#i miss everything :(#But im better off!
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y’all talk a big game about loving the Found Family trope, but have you ever personally burst into tears while watching 2000 Disney classic The Tigger Movie, in which Tigger realizes the existential horror and bone-aching loneliness of being “the only one” and starts desperately trying to contact other tiggers, building up his hopes only to have them crumble like like cheap honeycomb, but then he realizes that he already HAS a family right here with his friends in Hundred Acre Woods? huh? get on my level.
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sentiment
#i used the god is a woman bath bomb!!! it was heavenly!!#this is heavily inspired by sweetener!#i love ariana grande aaaa
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starting my 2019 out right by crying to panic at the disco music
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spoonfeed me my kid cuisine meal or i will say the f word
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