fakedsmiiles-archive

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I’ve returned! ...However, I will be moving blogs. This blog will be an archive after today, and will be moved to a completely different URL. This blog has given me one emotional roller-coaster that I had to jump out of quickly.

For those of you that have still been following me, even through my inactivity, thank you. I appreciate your dedication to me and my muse.

For those of you that will be getting to new URL, I hope to see you on the hopefully greener side.

Thank you, everyone.

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[fakedsmiiles-archive]

I’ll see you again.

There’s a faint buzzing at Kamina’s apartment as an envelope and a small purple box appears on the top of the couch. The envelope is tear stained and has blurred, inked letters on the front, writing in a dark purple hue, as if mixed with black or grey, but the letters... the letters spell a dangerous word. 

Goodbye.

The box held an unfamiliar piece of jewelry--a bracelet with multiple jewels on it--and there’s a note underneath it that reads: This was my mother’s bracelet. Keep it safe for me, and I’ll always be with you. There’s no signature or anything, but it has the same hue as the ink on the envelope. 

Were he to open the envelope, the first lines would be depressing, but hopeful. One could even consider it desperately foolish, but it was something, considering that this letter was written in a color that only he would recognize.

A vibrant purple.

       I know that today is Easter Sunday, but I couldn't put this off any longer. When and if I return, give the bracelet back to me as a camaraderie signet, and I'll know that you're not mad. As long as you wear that bracelet, I'll always be watching over you, no matter where I am in the world. I am bonded to you, after all. Kamina, please take care of yourself. The rest of this letter is just to show you how much I care, and how sorry I am that I have to leave you.       Kamina, you're my world. My lone star when dusk is falling. The first person to truly love me, for me. You were always there for me when I needed you, and I couldn't do that in the slightest, even when you called for me. For this, I am sorry. I am sorry that I couldn't be the significant other that I desired to be, because I loved you more than I could ever express, and I obviously hardly expressed it at all. Kamina, you are the only person that has ever gotten through to the inner person that I am, and learned things about me that I haven't ever told the people I've known for most of my life. You are my knight in shining armor, but I haven't been a very good damsel for you, and I don't wish to hurt you any longer.        I remember the first time we met offline. You were so excited, so happy to see me in person, and you didn't care about the extras that I harbored, and you didn't care that I was different. You took my differences and made them normal. You took my differences and held them as if they were precious treasures to you, and they deserved so much more than what anyone was giving them, and for this, I thank you, Kamina. You did this as a normal reaction, I'm sure, but it meant so so very much to me, and I would be glad to go back in time simply to relive such an experience with you. I remember the first time I found myself falling for you. It was like my world flipped upside down. Every time I thought of something, my mind put you in it somehow, even if it sounded bad, or looked bad, you were always in my mind, and eventually I got tired of the mystery and it made me find out that you reciprocated, and I couldn't have been happier. Everything you've done, everything we've done we've done together, you were standing there by my side, and I couldn't thank you more for simply being there when I needed you, and I'm sorry I couldn't do the same. You are my light, my night, and my knight. Don't ever change.        I have loved you for so very long, and so very much and you have shown you loved me as well, but I don't think that me disappearing for so long and so often is good for either of us. I would be honored to continue being with you in spirit, my love, but for right now, I don't think that it's best for either of us to continue to be with one another. Until the day comes that I am free from the curses I cannot explain... until the day comes that I am free from the hauntings of my past, I must leave you. I am so sorry for this, my love.

      Je'taime mi amor. Take care, and tell Simon I said goodbye.

                                                      I'll see you in a better place.

[fakedsmiiles-archive]

iunification replied to your post:i might put this blog on an indefinite hiatus...

do what’s best for you and your health hun. <3

i dont know what went wrong it was going so well

[fakedsmiiles-archive]

i might put this blog on an indefinite hiatus

everything thats been happening to her is really weighing me down too and i dont want that. but i dont know. 

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Reblog if you live in North America

I’m really curious about what the distribution of tumblr users looks like worldwide…

South America  Africa  Asia  Europe  Australasia   Central America  (Antarctica???)

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More singing for you guys.

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Tilting her head inquisitively for a moment-- it was almost as if she was trying to figure out something, but it quickly swam away as her childish smile reappeared at the mention of her brother. “Vraiment?! Tu ferais ça pour moi, madame?” At hearing the older’s words, she seems to hop in place a few times before speaking once more, tone dying down from a childish tone, to one of underlying grown up, ‘i’ve seen more than i should’ tones and a cover story of a kid. “Merci! Momma sera si fier quand je trouve petit frère.” Her words are confident, as if she'll find her brother, who is, according to her, lost, when, in all actuality, he is not. Not that she's old enough to realize this.

“Oui, vous pourriez dire que je suis comme votre mère” She says with a nod, forcing the normally edgier qualities out of her voice, if there was one personality trait that stuck with Dariana after the split, it was her light sides inability to harm grubs in anyway “Et si vous cherchez pour votre frère, peut-être je peux vous aider”

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*fucks up a lot* haha this is okay *fucks up big time* this is okay *gets fucked up* hahahahahaha this is fine *people insult me* this is fine *receives terrible grades* this is okay. *reminded of an interview tomorrow* sighs.

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kinda rests my head in my hands

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TL: baby come back. you can blame it -- temporalLust [TL] began pestering princessAriel [PA] at 18:37:30 -- TL: ALL -- temporalLust [TL] began pestering princessAriel [PA] at 18:37:35 -- TL: ON -- temporalLust [TL] began pestering princessAriel [PA] at 18:37:43 -- TL: ME~~~~~ -- temporalLust [TL] began pestering princessAriel [PA] at 18:38:10 -- TL: hahahaha.

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PA: uuuugh TL: kind of your fault there, mm. PA: i kNOW TL: plus you could have just, i don’t know, /waited/. PA: I KNOW TL: not to mention that this eeeentiiiirrreee epidemic you’ve got going on here could have been avoided if you just let your character be HAPPY YOU TALENTED SHIT. PA: *I KNOW* PA: GODDAMN JADE WHAT THE HELL I KNOW

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hhhnnnggg

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“We are young, we are gold, trying things we didn’t know... looking at the sky, see it come alive... All our fears, became our hopes, climbed out every locked window. The lines made, fell upon the rain...”

The song came naturally to her tongue, and it was like wind chimes on a sunny day in mid-September to the ears--pleasant, and welcome. Perhaps it was to get rid of the heart stopping feeling that her playful words had cut deeper than she intended them to, but she knew they did. Of course, it wasn’t as if she couldn’t... make it up to him... (Hopefully, she thought, I can.)

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> Your mouth opens as if you wanted to say something but there’s a stab in your heart, as if there was a dagger there, and you realize it’s because of your title. Fuck, it hurts. And that is because of you.

alright see you soon

> It’s all you can manage before simply moving to sing with all your heart. It’s what you’re made of, after all.

I resent that. But yeah…alright…in person though.

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you know i could tell you things that are unheard of and despised that have happened to me and people i know and you wouldnt believe me so

try me

I’m not sure you’d really believe me if I tried to explain.

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no but really maybe i could......